"You look distracted."

"I am," I admitted, before finishing off my champagne.

I absent-mindedly watched numerous faceless bodies mingle and dance all round the gigantic ballroom at the Olympus hotel in Manhattan. We were at the most awaited social event for all the mothers and daughters in New York City, the debutante ball.

It gave them an excuse to have designer dresses made and to be able to introduce their teenage daughters to society – parade them, more like. That was all there was to it.

I might be here physically, but my mind was in a suburban town across the river. I couldn't help but wonder what a particular someone was doing right now.

"Still thinking about that girl?"

I looked at Gavin, jealous that he didn't have to escort anyone tonight. He didn't have to be here. Not really. He could've stayed at home and skipped tonight's event.

I wished I had that same luxury.

"Aurora told me," he simply said.

Of course, she did. I turned my attention back to nowhere, not saying anything. I knew he wouldn't easily drop the subject, though.

"Is she really that remarkable?"

The corner of my lips lifted up slightly at the thought of Meadow. "She did leave quite a few marks on me." Literally.

"Why didn't you introduce her properly then?"

"I thought the answer was clear," I said, nodding to Conrad.

Gavin shook his head. "Conrad's just Conrad."

"That's not an excuse for his behavior."

He snorted. "There's never an excuse for his behavior."

I only sighed.

"It didn't bother you before."

"I didn't know any better before."

"And you do now?"

"I'm learning."

I could feel my childhood friend staring at me, making me glance at him. He had a bewildered expression on his face.

"Wow, you have changed," he noted.

"It's about time, isn't it?"

"Because of that girl."

Because of the girl.

He shook his head, refusing to acknowledge it. "It's just a phase, man."

I pursed my lips. "Is it?"

"You'll get over it once fall semester starts and everything goes back to normal." He sounded like he truly believed that.

"What if I don't like our normal routine anymore?"

He looked at me, with narrowed eyes. "You're serious."

I only stared at him, keeping myself silent as I let him figure it out. Gavin studied me for ages, before letting out a scoff. He stepped away, stopped, and then turned back to look at me. He gazed at me as though he didn't know me anymore.

"What the hell did they feed you over there?"

"Reality."

"Their reality is different from ours," he pointed out firmly.

"It's not, though," I said calmly. "Not really."

He looked at me for a few more moments, nodding. "Fine, I get it. You had some sort of eye-opening retreat, but you can't ask us to change just because you're on the path to becoming a saint."

"Don't exaggerate," I replied, rolling my eyes. "I'm still game to party or go on our spontaneous trips out of the country to skydive or whatever it is that interests us."

"What's your problem, then?" he demanded.

"The party favors," I deadpanned, giving him a hard look.

Understanding crossed his features, and he shook his head. "So that's what this is about? You don't want to use anymore."

"We can survive without it."

"We can." He nodded to a distance. "Good luck trying to convince those two."

"Conrad's only doing it because he can." My eyes traveled to our friends, and my attention zeroed in on Aurora. "Aurora, on the other hand..."

It wouldn't be easy to persuade her. She'd been relying on that dirty shit for years. I couldn't imagine the withdrawal she'd go through.

"While you contemplate on that, I'm gonna go and get more of this," Gavin said, raising his wine glass as he backed away. "Looks like I'm going to need it."

I sighed. "Thanks for the help."

"Always welcome."

Bored, I looked around the room. I caught my sister and her friends mingling, but I stared too long and one of them noticed me.

Ah, hell.

"Alex!" Kimberly called, waving me over.

I would keep it brief. While I liked them in general, I had more important matters to handle tonight than my sister's friends doting on me.

"Good evening, everyone," I greeted them, when I neared their group.

"Ah, the infamous Alex." Brian, Kimberly's husband, grinned at me. "Or should I call you Anders now?"

"Anders is fine, thanks."

Brian laughed, while Todd (my sister's husband) smirked. I faintly wondered if I would be this way with Gavin and the others in the future. My sister and her friends had known each other since high school. They were able to stay close through the years.

Then again, the circle we revolved in didn't have much room to move and expand unless they literally moved out of the city.

"I heard you ran into Dana in New Jersey," Kimberly said.

I nodded. "And her fiancé, Ethan."

"Was he pleasant to you?"

I thought about it. "Quite."

"That's hard to believe," Todd muttered.

"Be nice," Maxine told her husband. "He improved a ton from when we first met him."

"I don't know, Max." Brian tilted his head. "Remember when he offended his own uncle at that fundraising event? His cousin, Byron, had to calm things down between them before they could cause a scene."

"Neanderthal," Todd murmured.

"That's mean," my sister said, looking at him disapprovingly.

"I'm sorry, you're right." Todd lightly kissed the side of her head to appease her. "I shouldn't insult neanderthals by comparing them with the likes of him."

The corner of my lips twitched, daring to smile. Todd was my hero growing up. I always looked up to him, and that included his humor.

I was about to chime in when I caught my friends sneaking off to another room. And I knew immediately what they were planning to do.

"It was nice catching up with all of you," I told my sister and her friends. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to my friends."

As soon as possible.

"Have a good night," Brian said.

"Please do visit little Lincoln!" Kimberly pleaded, referring to their son who was practically my nephew already. "He misses you."

"I will," I assured her, kissing her cheek.

Maxine hugged me. "I'll be at mom's later."

"See you, buddy," Todd said, patting my shoulder.

After saying my goodbyes, I set out to find my friends. I saw them sneaking off to the parlor, so I started there. It was empty. I was about to move to another room when I saw the glass door to the balcony wide open.

I walked closer, watching the cold breeze move the curtains and letting me have a look on the people's silhouettes outside. I stopped as soon as I had my feet on the stoned floors of the balcony, eyeing my friends one by one.

Conrad had his head inches over the table, Aurora looked bored as she waited for her turn, and Gavin leaned on the railing as he watched the other two. I was relieved he wasn't participating, but also a little irked that he didn't stop them.

None of them appeared to have noticed me arrive yet.

Conrad raised his head and grinned. "That hits the spot."

Aurora sighed, pushing him away. "Move."

Fuck this.

Without so much as a warning, I marched over to them and wiped the contents of the marble table with a hand, letting the wind fly the dust particles away until they were all gone. Good thing the wind wasn't directed towards us.

"Hey!" Conrad yelled.

"Anders!" Aurora snapped, glaring at me.

Gavin remained silent, just watching us.

Conrad stood up and faced me, looking very enraged. He looked ready to hit me. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"What are you?" I demanded.

"We're doing what we've always done. Having fun."

"This isn't fun."

"Maybe not for you," Conrad spat.

"This needs to stop, Conrad," I said, pinching the bridge of my nose and hoping he would listen to me. "This isn't right."

"Don't fucking act all high and mighty. You're no better than us with all the shit you've done, too."

I let out a humorless laugh. "I may not be any better, but at least I'm trying."

"Trying to be fucking what?" Conrad stepped forward until we were barely inches apart. "Trying to be like those lowlives?"

My face hardened. "Watch your tongue."

"Or what?" he challenged.

My jaw clenched, as I tried to rein in my rising anger. I couldn't lose my temper. That would defeat the purpose of what I was trying to make them see.

I needed to stay calm and collected.

"Stop defending those beggars."

Nevermind.

The thin piece of tether holding me together snapped and I connected my fist into Conrad's face. He stumbled backward and almost lost his balance.

Aurora got to her feet, but she didn't go over to check on Conrad. She was rooted on the spot. While Gavin finally stepped forward and positioned himself between us, in case Conrad retaliated probably.

I looked down on Conrad. "I guess it's true what they say."

He caressed his jaw and spit out his blood, his dark eyes not leaving mine. I used to think he was just lost because no one was there to teach him proper manners and how to be a decent human being. But no, he simply didn't care.

It was all him.

"Money can't buy class," I stated.

"Fuck you, Anders," Conrad gritted out, scowling at me. "You don't have a right to condemn us for choosing this as our means to escape. If you want to stop using, be my fucking guest. That's your choice. Not ours."

"You really want to risk one of us overdosing again?"

"That's not going to happen," Aurora interjected.

My eyes locked with hers. "How sure are you?"

She looked away, and I saw the sadness she was trying to bury deep inside of her. I'd seen it too much. I let her do what she thought she needed to do in order to cope, but I was done letting her destroy herself in the process.

I walked over to her, and whispered, "This isn't the only way, Aura."

"You know it is."

"It isn't, though."

"What other choice do I have?" she murmured, before meeting my eyes with her teary ones. "I can't—I won't be able to bear the pressure without it. She's—" She paused as her lips trembled and she started to cry.

I pulled her to me, cradling her as she turned into the version of herself she was so afraid to be – vulnerable and helpless.

"She's suffocating me, Anders," she sobbed, clutching the front of my shirt as if I was her lifeline. Everything about her turned scarlet as she cried; her eyes, her nose, and her cheeks. "I can't—breathe anymore. I need it—to survive."

"You need help," I said softly.

She shook her head. "No."

"Please," I begged.

"No, I won't go."

"Aurora—"

"She won't allow it, Anders." She looked up at me desperately, looking so scared – far from the confident girl she showed everyone else. "It will taint our family name."

"Nobody has to know," I assured her.

Her forehead creased as she hesitated.

"I'll be there with you every step of the way."

"Me, too." Gavin nodded firmly. "As long as you need me."

Aurora shook her head, her face scrunching up again as she wept. "I can't tell her. Please don't make me tell her. I don't want her to lock me up again."

Her pale hands slowly let go of me and she hugged herself as she slid down to the floor, as though she was curling up into a little girl.

"This is what you want her to resort into?" Conrad demanded, his voice shaking in visible anger. He was too worked up.

Gavin faced him. "Shut the fuck up, asshole."

Conrad kicked the chair nearest to him. "This is bullshit."

"The door's right there," I told him. "What are you waiting for?"

He held his hands up and left. I'd talk to him again once he'd cooled down. It was pointless to talk to him in his current state. I just hoped he didn't do anything stupid.

Besides, someone else needed my sole attention right now. I knelt down in front of Aurora, and brushed her hair gently.

"You don't have to talk to your mother."

"I don't?" she asked, sounding hopeful.

I shook my head. "I know someone who can."

Gavin frowned in confusion. "Who?"

"My mom."

* * * * *

I left Aurora and my mom to talk in the study. She always had a soft spot for Aurora, and vice versa. I had no doubt she would do everything she could do to help.

"You're doing the right thing," Maxine said.

I sighed and sat on the armchair in the living room of my home. Seeing as I had fond memories here, I should've felt relaxed. I was back in my comfort zone.

But all I wanted was this night to be over already.

I rubbed my face, tired of the events tonight. Somehow, a part of me craved to go to the diner with Meadow and just chill – embrace the quiet night.

"Gavin went to the kitchen to get coffee," my sister informed me, as she looked at me from the long sofa she occupied. She put down her iPad on the coffee table, bringing her full attention to me.

I nodded. "Where's Todd?"

"Tending to our son."

I made a mental note to drop by my nephew's room tomorrow morning.

Maxine reached out and grabbed my right hand, studying my reddened knuckles. "Does this have anything to do with why Conrad has an upcoming bruise on his face?"

"We got into a fight," I admitted.

"I see. Are you still friends?"

"I guess we'll find out soon enough."

She stared at me.

"What?"

"There's something different about you."

Huh. "That seems to be a popular opinion today."

"But what do you think?"

I shrugged. "I'm still me, only wiser."

She laughed, letting go of my hand and leaning back. "Well, with where you were when you left, that's not really much of an improvement."

I let out a small smile. "Says the one who almost failed her classes if not for her boyfriend tutoring her."

That made her scoff in disbelief. "Not everyone is gifted in math and science like you and Todd."

"You're forgetting history, literature, economics, geogra—"

"Alex, please shut up."

I burst out laughing, and I remembered how Meadow always made me laugh – be it unintentional or not.

"In other news, you'll be pleased to know that you're officially off the hook. You can spend the rest of the summer with your beloved freedom."

I blinked in surprise. "Are you serious?"

"Yes." My sister nodded. "Mother's convinced you've learned your lesson. She's heard good things about you from the people at that youth center."

I leaned back, and let out a breath. "Wow."

A part of me wondered if they talked to Meadow about me. It wasn't a secret that we spent a lot of time together – not to anyone in Mount Valley.

"I know," Maxine breathed out, looking thoughtful. "You must have really made an impression there."

I stared into space, letting the news sink in. This was what I had been waiting for this whole summer, getting my freedom back. I officially had it again. I thought about all the things I could do without restrictions.

Most of all, I wouldn't be stuck in one place anymore.

But then... it wasn't too bad being in Mount Valley. It even ended up being fun, in the most unexpected way. I genuinely enjoyed myself. And it was all because of one girl.

Hold on, did this mean I wouldn't get to see Meadow anymore?

"You look like I gave you bad news," Maxine mentioned. "Aren't you supposed to be celebrating?"

"I should." I finally got what I wanted. I was back home, in a city that I loved.

"So why aren't you?"

"Why aren't I?" I repeated, spacing out.

Meadow's sun-kissed face filled my mind, with her long hair flying back from the wind as she laughed in delight beside me in my car.

"Are you alright?"

I looked at my sister, and admitted, "I don't know."

She got to her feet and walked over to me. She leaned down and placed her hand against my forehead to check my temperature.

"I'm not sick," I told her.

She frowned, looking deep in thought. "But—"

"I'll go take a walk." Getting up, I kissed her on the cheek. "I'll be back."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"No, I won't be long." I glanced at the door to the study room where my mom and Aurora were still talking, before heading to the front door. "See you in a bit."

"Okay." Maxine didn't sound too convinced. "Are you sure you're alright?"

I looked at her over my shoulder. "Don't worry, Max. I just need some fresh air."

She didn't look like she believed me.

Nonetheless, I walked out and took a stroll along Park Avenue.

It was already past midnight, yet the city was still very much alive. I watched the honking vehicles passing by, people minding their own business, and tall buildings that covered much of the sky.

Every soul was too busy with their fast paced lifestyles. Nobody ever bothered to stop and look around them long enough to see their surroundings anymore.

It was quite different from the cozy town just over the river, where everyone took their time with everything and almost all had smiles on their faces.

Yet this city was home – my home.

And suddenly, I knew what to do.