Leering at the home stood near the end of the long, winding driveway, Yoongi tries his best to keep the bile down that's threatening to exit his system.

The warmth of the car heater has begun to slowly cool since the engine had been turned off but, despite the chill licking at his skin, the man remains sitting behind the wheel, sweat beading at the nape of his neck, staring straight ahead.

He has so many memories in this home, from the moment that Jungkook and his mother moved in all those years ago.

Most were good, some were not, and some were the source of the guiltiest thoughts Yoongi's ever had.

All of which involving his kind, lanky younger step-brother; with his inquisitive eyes and toothy smile.

Their parents had started dating when Yoongi was ten.

Within a year of meeting they were engaged and it wasn't until the engagement party that Yoongi met Jungkook.

He had been a skinny, chronically shy eight-year old with slightly long hair, his fringe swept just enough out of his eyes for him to be able to peer curiously around him without too much obstruction of his view, but also long enough for him to hide behind if his head was ducked low enough.

Those dark, round eyes the size of Jupiter were always– have always been– so wide, taking in the world around him quietly.

The more comfortable he became with Yoongi– letting his bright smile show more freely– the more Yoongi felt compelled to protect him from the world.

Made Yoongi want to work tirelessly, doing whatever he could to keep that smile on Jungkook's face.

Over the next few years, Yoongi and Jungkook progressively became closer.

The older couldn't go anywhere without his little shadow in the form of Jungkook tailing close behind.

By the time Yoongi started high school– Jungkook in middle school at that time– it was as if they were real brothers.

Even the couple years difference in school didn't keep them from spending nearly everyday together, often opting to stay home to laze around with each other rather than hang out with their schoolmates.

When it was time for Yoongi to go off to college, Jungkook took it the hardest.

Yoongi and Jungkook both struggled with Yoongi moving away for the school year, but the knowledge that he would be back the following summer to spend the break at home made the time apart a bit more bareable for the two boys.

Yoongi spoke to Jungkook more than he did their parents while he was attending school.

They would talk about anything from Jungkook's classes to new songs and artists Yoongi had discovered, to Jungkook's brief stint on the baseball team before he decided he liked individual sports better and decided to take up boxing.

They even talked about Jungkook's discombobulated feelings about guys and girls.

This specific conversation lead to Yoongi sharing with the younger that he himself was bisexual and Jungkook concluding that he too fell under that spectrum, realizing with Yoongi's assurance that it was okay to be attracted to boys the same way he was to girls.

When the homesickness got to be too much, Yoongi would call Jungkook and listen to him chatter, the sound of his voice along with his laughter never failing to unravel the built up nerves in Yoongi's chest.

It was bittersweet for the two when Yoongi ended up not returning home in order to do a summer internship– one not usually awarded to freshman that he'd applied for on a whim.

The brothers were sad but also excited for the opportunity because it was going to help Yoongi get a leg up for his chosen career path.

If not sooner, Yoongi had promised to come home for Jungkook's birthday in September.

To their pure delight, that promise he was able to keep.

When it was time for Yoongi to come home, upon seeing Jungkook it was immediately apparent that this Jungkook wasn't the same one he had left previously.

He may have sounded relatively unchanged on the phone, but he only looked similar to the lanky boy Yoongi had left behind.

Jungkook had suddenly grown to be this taller, lean seventeen year old.

One thing that hadn't changed was his habit of hanging onto not only Yoongi's every word, but his body as well.

He still always seemed to be draping his arms around Yoongi's shoulders– paying no mind to how he easily outweighed Yoongi by ten kilos– to lean against him, resting his chin on Yoongi's shoulder or his head.

Whenever they were near each other, Jungkook always seemed to be touching Yoongi to some capacity.

Jungkook had always been a touchy, cuddly child, but now– and Yoongi wracked his brain many nights debating if he were imagining things or not– the touches seemed to be a little too gentle, sometimes lasting a little too long to just be friendly.

Or, brotherly, for that matter.

Yoongi had been doing an okay job of steadfastly ignoring the shameful tug of attraction he felt every time he looked at Jungkook.

That was until the younger had caught him alone in the kitchen one evening during a visit home during Yoongi's winter break.

Yoongi purposely didn't meet Jungkook's eyes as the younger sauntered into the room.

"Hyung," Jungkook voiced, sounding tense, "I've been looking for you."

"Oh?" Yoongi answered back, focusing intently on the iced coffee sat on the table in front of him.

Jungkook only hummed in answer.

Yoongi could feel goosebumps on his arm at the same time his body tensed when Jungkook slid into the chair next to him– despite there being three other chairs situated around the circular dining table he could have chosen to rest.

When Yoongi heard a sniffle in the silence between them, he snapped his eyes to Jungkook to see him staring at his hands, looking like he was on the verge of tears.

Immediately Yoongi forgot all about the cup he'd pretended to be so interested in– as well as everything else that wasn't Jungkook– and leaned over to put his arms around his brother.

Feeling the weight and warmth of Yoongi's arm pulling him into a side hug, Jungkook curled into Yoongi's side.

"Promise you won't hate me?" He'd asked in a quiet, nervous voice.

"I could never hate you," Yoongi promised easily. "Never."

Jungkook worried his bottom lip to keep it from wobbling while Yoongi waited patiently for him to either voice what he was thinking, or to simply be there to support and hug him for as long as he needed wordlessly.

"I think I'm in love," Jungkook whispered finally. "I think I'm in love and I don't know what to do about it... If I even can do anything about it."

Yoongi felt his heart abruptly stop before it began pounding wildly in his chest.

At first the words hurt him, but then he'd been overwhelmed by the sudden rage– which he later concluded was jealousy– he felt towards whoever the no doubt undeserving person was who was fortunate enough to gain Jungkook's affection to such a degree as him falling in love with them.

Yoongi took a deep breath, telling himself that he was going to do the mature thing and help Jungkook through his turmoil.

He could contemplate stalking and possibly murdering a stranger later.

He had tugged the distraught boy closer then. "Hey, that's not a bad thing, Kook-ah. It may be kind of scary, feeling so much for someone, but that's great. I'm happy for you."

Jungkook didn't say anything, only twisting in his seat, burying his face into the juncture of Yoongi's neck and shoulder.

Jungkook's shoulders began to raise shakily as he took a couple deep breaths before speaking again.

The words were delivered quickly, lost to Yoongi as week as Jungkook's voice was completely muffled.

Yoongi had nudged Jungkook. "What was that?"

"It's you," Jungkook repeated shakily.

Yoongi's heart stopped again. "W-What?"

Jungkook rubbed his nose against Yoongi's neck. "I'm in love with you..."

Yoongi shoves back from Jungkook a little too harshly. Confused and disbelieving, but mostly shocked.

He exhaled, the sound more of a gasp then a stable breath.

"I'm in love with you," Jungkook repeated.

"No you aren't," Yoongi answered curtly.

Jungkook followed as Yoongi leaned away. "Yes, I am. I love you. I'm in love with you."

"We're brothers, Jungkook. You are my little brother," Yoongi argued firmly, enunciating every word.

"Not by blood," Jungkook had pointed out immediately. "Nobody would care."

"I care!" Yoongi snapped.

His heart was thundering behind his rib cage then and he could hear the erratic rhythm in his ears.

Jungkook pressed on. "I bet our parents would be okay with it. They know how close we are. And this isn't much different from childhood friends falling in love."

Yoongi shook his head. "No, Kook. You- you don't love me. Not like that. You're just confused! You don't know-"

"I know what I want!" Jungkook had raised his voice then, something he rarely did. At least not in a serious way.

In that moment, he was nothing but serious.

He was standing in front of Yoongi then, eyes full of unshed tears and his heart on his sleeve.

Yoongi had never seen him look so upset. So determined.

Yoongi could see just how much conviction Jungkook was putting behind every word and it terrified him.

All of these words, all of these feelings of guilt and confusion and worry that Yoongi had been suppressing and denying came flooding back at once.

It was overwhelming. And Yoongi... he couldn't handle it.

So what did he do? He ran. Literally.

He pushed his chair away from the table, got to his feet and left, taking off to his room to hastily pack what he could before leaving the house.

He'd spent the remaining time in his hometown at his childhood friend Jimin's place before going back to school, purposely avoiding his parents home where Jungkook was before leaving again for school.

Their parents had been confused, of course they were, and Yoongi could tell they didn't quite accept his excuse of needing to get back to school early to complete a project he'd forgotten about, but they didn't press or push for more detail. To his relief.

He ran away like a coward, and he's been running ever since.

He ignored phone calls, texts and emails until finally, Jungkook stopped trying to talk to him.

The day that Yoongi realized it had been nearly a month since Jungkook had attempted to contact him, he went straight to the nearest bar and got blackout drunk.

He's managed to avoid Jungkook for two years now. He's become a pro at dodging him, vetting family gatherings– insuring Jungkook's whereabouts, confirming his attendance or lack of– and avoiding holidays like the plague.

And now he's here; sitting in front of the house where it happened, two years later.

He couldn't get out of this visit. Not this time.

(His mother had cried when she'd called to ask if he was coming. She never cries.)

Jungkook's in that house which means Yoongi's going to have to finally face the full consequences of his stupidity.

No point in prolonging this any more.

God knows he's done that long enough.