1979 // The Smashing Pumpkins

Sometime early the next morning I'm struggling to keep my eyes open. I'm on set wrapping up a scene where I have to fight the bad guy, aka the guy playing Emily's dad. Every move is choreographed but we've done it so many times I don't even have to think about which side to throw the punches. It's automatic. And thank God, because I'm so brain dead if I'd have to think through each move, we'd never finish filming.

Joe, a character actor who's been some famous bad guys over his career, sneers at me as soon as the director shouts action. The rain machine soaks us along with everything in the shot. Joe's hair drips into his eyes and down his expertly dirtied up face. The fake cut by his lip looks like it's oozing blood. His strategically ripped shirt is covered in mud, giving the appearance that we've already been on the ground a few times. The lights of the street shine into the alley where we're filming, bouncing off the wet bricks and concrete surrounding us.

"I knew to trust my gut about you." Joe grits out his line. "My daughter may have been fooled but I never was."

I scoff, using my exhaustion to fuel the character. He'd be wiped out after going a few rounds in an alley with a mafia king pin posing as a secret agent.

"You don't know your daughter very well if you think she hasn't figured out the truth."

"Oh, I know my girl. She's a doe. Innocent to the darkness surrounding her."

I chuff a laugh, running my hand over my mouth and chin as I shake my head.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night."

Joe tilts his head, an eyebrow raised in distain. "I sleep like the dead. Something you'll be doing a few seconds from now."

Our director yells cut and then the sweetest words I've ever heard follow it up. "That's a wrap!"

Fuck, I'm beat. Staying up all night to film after the emotional roller coaster of sending Char back to her real life has kicked my ass. I grab a towel from one of the set assistants to rub the dirt and fake rain off my face. After handing the towel back covered in grime, along with my thanks, I walk the block to where my trailer is set up.

But once I swing open the door and step inside, I'm face to face with an uninvited guest.

"What are you doing in here?"

Emily's lounging on the couch in my trailer, scrolling her phone while swinging her crossed leg up and down. Her eyes dart up and shoot me with a look I can't decipher.

"Don't you have your own trailer?" I stay by my door, holding the handle so I can lock it as soon as she's out.

"Yes, I do but the drama is in this one."

Her words, which are sarcastic and accusatory, don't match the seriousness of her tone. I'm confused. We've gotten along throughout filming. She's kind of in-your-face about everything but I've never gotten a vibe from her like I'm getting now. I don't like it.

"Drama? Yeah, that's a no thank you. I avoid drama these days." Something about her body language has me on edge. I need to get her out of here.

"Um, think again cowboy." She turns her phone around and shoves it in my face. "Looks like you're front page news."

Newbie Actor Hooks Up with Pop Star's Agent

My skin prickles as I read the headline. It's mocking and trite but not really that bad. After all, we knew we'd be outed eventually. Might as well be now.

"I'd hardly call this drama. We were under the radar for a while but it's not shocking that the gossip rags picked it up."

Emily closes her eyes. "Did you even scroll?"

I swallow. "No."

She waves her fingers in my direction. "Scroll before you decide whether there's drama or not."

I skim most of the article. It's typical of a rag like this. Speculation from an unknown source about how long we've been together, a few not-so-subtle hints that I'm dating Char out of convenience but that's not unusual when an actor dates someone in the industry. I tell myself it's really not that bad. Until I get to the bottom.

"There's a video?"

Emily nods, now laying across the couch on her stomach.

"They posted to their Web show."

"Fuck."

"Yeah, that's what you were doing."

I freeze for a few seconds before I'm able to look up at her. "What?"

"Watch. You'll see."

Reluctantly, I hit the play button on the link. The reporter talks about Char's link to Brianna and my breakout roll opposite Emily Montano. Then she drops the bomb about hidden footage of us during the tour. A grainy montage of shots flash past, shots of the two of us on different stops, a couple of backstage images, and then a video plays with a lot of sounds of rustling fabric and moans, but not any distinguishable pictures.

"That could be anyone," I say. I want to be relieved, but I have a feeling it's too early to blow this off.

"Keep watching," Emily says, confirming my fears.

Seconds later a bright shot of red hair cascading down the side of a bed comes into view. My head pops up from behind, clear as day, followed by Char throwing her head back, all that red hair flying away from her face as she's making what I know to be her orgasm wail. But before it's any more salacious, the scene cuts off.

"What the fuck! That's in my hotel room." I grip the phone with white knuckles as the realization hits me. Someone was in my room. Filming us? What the hell?

Emily grabs her phone out of my hands before I shatter the fucking thing.

"This is the only outlet with the footage at this point, but..."

"But what?"

"But thousands of screen recordings are reposting it. On every social media site. And a couple of porn sites, too."

"Porn? You can't even see anything happening."

"Apparently there's a longer cut that's more graphic."

"You're telling me there's a sex tape. I made a fucking undercover sex tape and now I'm on porn hub." An eerie calm takes over as I sink into a lounge chair. I've almost forgotten my surroundings until Emily pats my shoulder.

This is disgusting. I feel sick. I know I'll start freaking out eventually but right now I'm numb. I need to call Char but I'm afraid she doesn't know yet. I don't want to be the one to tell her. But I also don't want her to find out and think I don't care. Before I can make a decision whether to call her or not, David bursts into the trailer.

"Sorry," he says, out of breath. "But don't freak out. It's not that bad."

I look at him, silently, starting to feel like my world just ended. And then I picture Char, knowing all she's had to battle against over the last year. I'm hit with the deep understanding that this is not even remotely about me. I look David in the eyes with a renewed purpose.

"I'm not freaking out. I'm seething. It doesn't even matter what they say about me. I couldn't give less of a shit if they drag my name through the mud right now. But they brought Char into it." I stand up, stepping closer to David, wishing I had the resources my character does so I could drown the motherfucker who decided to film our private moment.

"Char is wrapped up in a bitter divorce." I point to the video link. "And this could seriously complicate things for her." My stomach rolls picturing the shit show this is going to become. I can't fucking let that happen.

David puts his hands on my shoulder. "I know. And I've already called Clinton. He's sending a team out here as well as putting one on Char."

I breathe a sigh of relief knowing Clinton is involved. I need to call her but I won't be able to hold her in my arms. To reassure her that I'm in her corner.

"You know," Emily starts, reminding me she's still in my trailer, "These articles paint Curt like the poor, abandoned husband and Char the insensitive, philandering wife."

I see red instantly. The opposite is literally the truth.

"Do we have anyone on this?" I glare in David's direction although I don't mean to take this out on him. It's not his fault. "And who the fuck got into my room? I want security to sweep through and remove whatever devices were planted. And I want the surveillance footage. Whoever planted it is not getting away with it."

"Also already have that taken care of. Clinton made contact with some of his old police buddies. They've been investigating everything since thirty minutes after the video was uploaded."

Fuck. I guess it pays to know a former cop.

"How long ago did this post?"

David looks grim. "Just after midnight but you were already filming and Char was midair, so we decided to take care of it for you."

"We?"

David's mouth tilts up a few degrees. "Zack contacted me. Then Clinton. Your agent. A few contacts I have in the assistant world."

I nod, not having any more words. I feel violated. I can't imagine how Char will feel. Or maybe she already knows.

"I need to call her."

"Of course. We'll give you some privacy." David gives Emily a look. She rolls her eyes but gets up off the couch to leave.

"Don't say I didn't warn you." Emily says as she walks out the door.

"You literally didn't."

"Ah, but I did say that being in the spotlight sucks."

She did say that, practically the first thing out of her mouth when we met.

"Not exactly a bright shining light on the perils of fame."

"Hey, if you didn't already figure out that the celebrity life-style blows chunks, I can't help you." She pauses at the open trailer door, David quietly urging her to keep going. "But, I do remember the first big mess I got in after Queen of Shame came out. And the one thing this will do for you is show you who your true friends are." Emily's face softens. "I think you probably already know."

"Yeah," I say, rubbing the back of my neck. "I do."

Emily finally leaves, pulling the trailer door shut behind her. I lock it and find my way to the back bedroom. Maybe I'll sleep here tonight. I don't think I can sleep in my hotel room again. Which bites because I was looking forward to wrapping up in the Char scented sheets on my bed.

My heart aches thinking of her, wondering if she's crying or hiding or both. I pull my phone out. No messages from her, but she may think I'm still on set and our director has a strict policy on phone use during filming.

I dial her contact and wait for her to pick up, hoping she does.

"Hey," she says, her voice small and weak.

"Baby, I just got back to my trailer. Long night."

"In more ways than one."

"I'm assuming you know."

Char takes a deep, unsteady breath. "Yeah." That one word is so heavy I have to lay down from the weight of it.

"Are you okay?"

She hesitates.

"Tell me."

"No. Not really. Some of the articles quote Curt. I have a terrible feeling."

"What feeling babe?" The dark room around me cloaks this conversation in secrecy. It's could be just the two of us against the world right now. But we have an army of friends, closer to family than any casual relationship could be, and they've got our backs.

"This is the perfect scenario for Curt. It puts him exactly where he wants to be going into court in a few weeks. I look really shitty and he's been coasting undetected for a long time." She sighs. "I had the terrible thought this could be a double whammy for him."

"In what way?"

"He could use this as the excuse for the C1 suit as well. He was under stress from his terrible marriage to a cheating spouse who apparently flaunted her conquests in his face. Now he has receipts."

"It won't get to that."

"You can't be sure."

"I won't let it."

"How? How can you possibly change it?"

She's right. I don't know where to begin. But I can't let the way I feel about her be cheapened by that absolute shitbag of a human.

"Honey, all we have is the truth. It's time to start telling it."

"The truth."

"Everything Curt wants buried. Everything he's said and done to keep you under his thumb and manipulate the band. All of it. He may have manufactured receipts for his narrative, but you've got the real deal. And everyone is on your side."

"The truth shall set us free," she says.

Okay, this sort of went where I thought it was going to go...along with some details I wasn't expecting. I won't expand on that until next time because first I need to see how big of a deal these details become...

Also, I literally could't help myself with the title and the chosen song. The pumpkin theme just happened but I think it works. The articles are painting Char as the cheater but we all know Curt's the pumpkin eater lol!

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

I wasn't born in 1979(quite a few years earlier lol!) but I do remember it. I literally remember a neighbor kid saying in December of that year that "1979's been a good year." although I have no idea what happened to make it a good one, lol!