| I Want To Be With You ~ chloe moriondo |

It hasn't hurt like this in quite some time. The tears rolling down her cheeks are harsher on me than the fire that scarred me forever. She bats her eyelashes and tries to rub them off quickly with the back of her hand, but she can't hide the bloodshot eyes and the runny nose.

Why does it hurt so much?

She is too beautiful to cry, too pure a soul to be polluted by misery. I'll fuck up whoever has hurt her. Is it because I asked her to pose for me?

"What happened, Niji?" I ask, pulling her hand as she tries to leave my side, "Why are you crying?"

"It's really nothing," she says, sitting back down with a thump, and when I don't reply for a solid minute, she adds a meek "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cry."

I turn her face toward me to find her eyes still rimmed with water. She looks away and stares at a random spot on the floor until the tears become too heavy for her eyelids to hold, and they drop on my hand. Warm and fat, like summer evening rain. I can't stand this any longer.

"Tell me who has hurt you and I will see to it that tonight is the worst night of their life." I tell her. And I mean every word of it.

Niji gives out a little laugh - the mocking kind, the you-should-know-this-already kind of laugh. "You've already half-succeeded then. It's not my worst night but I've pretty much ruined it for myself. And you."

She laughs when she sees my face, probably all scrunched up and confused. The leftover tears jerk off her beautiful round face. "I just went down an overthinking spiral, Maki-san," she says, lightly touching my fingers on her face. "Don't worry, okay?"

Then I do something that surprises even me. I pull her face closer and kiss her in the middle of her forehead. For as long as I hold the kiss, it could have easily been a scene from a South Korean romance. And I'm surprised by how it doesn't bother me. I don't find it cringey, or awkward.

Niji is shocked too. Probably more than I thought she would be. She doesn't say anything for a little while and only stares at the general vicinity of my arms. Her expression mellows into a small smile and she whispers, "Thank you, Maki-san."

I touch the nape of her neck, underneath her hair, and pull her face close to my chest. It feels oddly intimate, possibly more intimate than fucking. It's been quite some time since I've let someone get so close to me. Physically, as well as emotionally. "You, I won't hurt," I whisper to her, scratching the back of her head in a rather caring manner. "You, I can't hurt. But I will take care of you. Make sure your negative thoughts are turned to positive. If you let me."

"Yes." She gasps, heaving her head up from my chest. "Yes, please." This time, she pulls me closer, her forehead against mine, her lips on mine, her fingers in my hair. She kisses me, and kisses me, and kisses me. And I let her. Until her hands move to my shoulders and I let out a wince. I think she shrinks away from me when I remove her hands, a little too sharply.

"I'm sorry." She sits back down and I realize she was almost on top of me. Her kisses had made me lose my sense of space and movement, and I hadn't felt how I was easing back on the bed, allowing her body to move over mine.

"I'm sorry, Maki-san. I shouldn't have... not without asking... I'm sorry."

Oh! She knows.

I sigh. "I think..." I emphasise on the 'ink', "two interruptions are omen enough that tonight should be less about sex, and more about... other things."

Niji looks at me guiltily, her mouth drooping into a literal sad emoji. Fuck, she's so cute! "I'm sorry," she says, looking away, "I'm sure you had plans and... I ruined them."

"Oh please." I lie down and spread my arm on the bed. "Come here. You're little spoon."

"Of course." She smiles and puts her head down on my arm. I touch her waist with my other hand, giving it a little squeeze, before sliding across her warm, soft belly. She breathes her tummy in a little momentarily but lets go soon.

"What's your favourite colour?" I ask, giving her shoulder a little kiss.

"Orange." She replies almost instantly.

"Orange? Really?"

Niji giggles. "Why? You don't like orange?"

"I don't know. It's a little too bright for me. I thought your favourite colour is pink."

"Pink suits me, yes." She says it with a level of natural confidence that I wish she always had. "But my favourite color is orange. Specifically the orange of a sunny side up." And I instantly decide what I'm gonna make her for breakfast in the morning.

"What's your favourite colour?" She asks me and I blank out. I don't think I've ever seen the world in colors, but more so after Nobara left. It used to be at least black and white before, but now it's more of a muddy, retro-movie sepia.

"What do you think is my favourite colour?" I turn the question to her.

Niji shifts so she's laying on her back now, sandwiched between my arms, and I just wanna grab her cheeks so bad, kiss her so bad, push my tongue in until she's moaning just from smooching. She's careful with me, always maintaining at least a little distance, making sure her hand never touches my body. How and when did she figure it out?

"Mmm... I think it's either black or red. You seem like you had a goth phase in high school or the first year of college." She giggles again. It's such a wonderful sound, it can heal all my misery. She asks, "Am I correct, Maki-san?"

I squeeze her cheeks so her lips pucker and say, "You're wrong. I had my goth phase when I was ten," and I kiss her. All tongue and teeth, my hands on her boobs. When I sit up straight over her, she looks utterly disheveled but she whispers, "Wow," and I know - I somehow know - this beautiful girl will tear down all my walls one day soon and I will be left vulnerable to the world of hurt again. I also know that there's nothing I can do to avoid it.

So I lay next to her, I lay with her. For days, and nights. And I convince my sister to fill in for her, I take her to my jujutsu sorcerers only parties, I learn more and more about her childhood and why she is as fragile as she is, and I wish to one day let her touch me in all the places she wishes to touch me.

Towards the end of June, on a particularly rainy afternoon, I get an unexpected call. Actually, I was expecting this call much sooner but with a completely different tone of conversation.

"This is Jordan Thatcher. Am I speaking to freelance photographer, Maki Zenin?" Said the voice on the other side. No matter how hard he tried to sound smooth, it was the voice of a seasoned killer. Jordan could never disguise the lackluster lack of empathy in his words.

"Yes, this is her." I too feign an interest in what he has to say.

"Great!" He sounds excited. "I might have a job for you. Are you available today in the evening?"

I was going to spend the rest of my day at the apartment, waiting for Niji to come home from her ballet practice but I'm not one to ditch making money. Even if the money is coming from the dirty hands of a monster.

"Sure. What kind of a job is this? If you got the number from my website, you should know there are certain events I don't cover."

He laughs. "Don't worry about that. This is just a shoot for the college dance club's website. Just come to the ground floor studio at the Katsushika Block by six-thirty. Our dancer and the scene should be ready by the time you arrive. All we need from you is a little direction and the photos. Sounds good?"

"Yes, sure." There's a prickling feeling down the back of my neck. "I know some people from the dance club. May I know who I'll be working with today?

"Just come, Maki. Knowing you, I promise you a good time. Along with the money, obviously." He lets out an almost maniacal chuckle before hanging up.

Fucker!

I think about texting Niji but what if she's not a part of this? Because if she was, and she knew they were calling me to cover it, why wouldn't she inform me beforehand? I know it'll make her miserable knowing there was an opportunity to be a face on the club's official website and she wasn't asked to be in it.

She has been on edge for over a week now, ever since her parents called to tell her they'll be visiting soon. I'm not aware when that soon is but I know it's soon. I woke up this morning to the overwhelming stench of burnt cigarettes and found her in the middle of a cloud of stagnant smoke that I had to fan out into the balcony. My poor plants!

Gojo owns the whole building so we won't get in trouble but the fact that the smoke detector didn't go off makes me wonder how long it'd be before anyone knows if we actually do get in trouble.

Changing my mind, I drop a regular text.

M: Hi, baby! Thought we'll get some Pad Thai noodles for dinner today. You have anything else in mind?

An hour later, and with no reply, I drop another text.

M: Hey, did Mr. and Mrs. Gushiken finally tell you when they're coming over?

Another hour and a tour to and from the apartment later, I find myself in front of the Katsushika Block with my camera bag on my back and tripod cover swinging from my shoulder. They're waterproof and safe from the rain but my hair is vulnerable.

Niji has still not responded. It's six-fifteen and I don't like to be early so I take a turn toward my regular smoke shop. Yuji and I had to recently exorcise a fucking notorious curse that was nesting there, bringing the whole vibe down, and the place looks a lot cleaner now. The regulars sitting outside also seem a lot more jovial than they used to be a couple of weeks ago.

I recognise a very familiar bulging of biceps peeking from the side of the shop. A purple Takada-chan fan club t-shirt and his signature loose blue pants that he has been wearing since our Jujutsu High days.

Wait! Todo doesn't smoke.

I buy my Marlboro Light and walk toward him. Before I make the turn to face him, I hear his deep gravelly voice. I stop to eavesdrop. Because, why not?

"Don't worry," He's saying, "We're all here with you and for you. Have you seen me?" He flexes his arm. Maybe he's with someone he's trying to impress. I start to leave but his next words stop me.

"Have you seen my best friend's muscles? Yuuji, I mean. What about Kamo? Panda? Maki? You must have seen Maki's arm, eh? She's pretty strong. She'll take him down by herself."

Okay, wow. I guess I'm not forgotten. But who is he with?

"Say, how long are you two together now? Three months? That's the longest she has ever been with someone since..."

"Hey!" I barge in. My tripod slips off my shoulder and I drop my Marlboro on the plotchy ground. It's a whole scene but at least I've stopped Todo from doing the absolute unspeakable.

Sure enough, Niji is sitting beside him, in her slacks and a hoodie, a half ashed cigarette in hand while Todo holds a bottle of diet Coke in one hand and munches on some french fries with the other.

"You know, in some cultures, this would indicate a long life," Todo says, dipping a fry in some mayo.

"They actually called you?" Niji's voice is barely a decibel above whisper. She stands up and pulls me toward her. "Don't go, Maki-san. I'm very sure this is a trap. Jordan sensei specifically wanted to invite you for this shoot from the very first."

There are tears in her eyes. These tears have been more frequent in the last few weeks and every time, I feel like punching a wall. Or an actual person.

"Baby, tell me what happened." I make her sit and squat between her knees.

She sniffles. "I don't know what got into his head today but he wants to take some photographs of me for the club's official website. Photos of me pole dancing. And since the start..."

"Pole dancing?" I had no idea Niji could do that.

"Yes, Maki-san." She doesn't explain the pole dancing. "Some handymen have come and set up a pole in the middle of the studio and he has been making me practice on that for the last three hours. This is the first break I could get. And that too because Utahime sensei came in and vouched for me. Anyway, I really don't think you should go. I think he knows. About us. Somehow. And it'll be really dangerous for you."

This sure is a predicament. But I have to be strong for her.

"You think Jordan can hurt me? Or, are you scared that he'll hurt you in front of me? You think I'll let that asshole lay one finger on you?"

Niji quietly shakes her head. "But, Maki-san..."

"No but, baby. Come here." I rise a little on my heels and pull her forward with the sides of the hood around her face. She moans into my mouth as I bite her lower lip, tasting the bitterness of coffee and tobacco, and the salt of her sweat from her chin.

I have made some compromises, allowing her to touch my face. Just my face. She understands that it will take me much longer than she might have anticipated. She just wants to make proper use of as many inches she's allowed to touch. So she does. She cups my face in her hands and kisses me back so, so earnestly.

Some of her kisses make me want to cry. I think she's in love with me. I think I...

"Simp!"

A cough and that comment make us part. Niji chuckles.

It's Panda and Inumaki, peeping from the side of the shop. Todo offers them his fries and they each shamelessly pick up handfuls.

"Why don't we tag along?" Todo says, gulping down a mouthful of chewed potato. "So even if Jordan pulls out some trick, we'll all be there to put a stop to it."

"Salmon," Inumaki agrees. Does he even know what's up?

"You guys want me to look like a fucking loser, you morons?" I interject. "I'll handle him myself if he needs to be handled. I don't need your help."

"Maki-san." Niji holds my chin and turns my face toward her. "Asking for help doesn't make you look like a loser. I promise."

I sigh, knowing there's no arguing with her after this. She's become increasingly bolder in the last couple of months, sometimes edging on bratty. It suits her.

We come to a compromise. Todo stations just outside the Katsushika Block, and Inumaki and Panda loiter in the corridors of the first floor to keep an eye out for any signs of commotion. Niji enters the studio first. I go in a few minutes later and just to keep up the facade of not knowing each other, we let Jordan introduce us to each other as "artist and muse", as he puts it. We bow to each other before getting on with it.

Can you guess who fell first? If your answer is Niji, you're probably wrong. But let's see how this plays out. A little angst coming up in the next chapter or the one after that. Enough with the fluff now, am I right?

A/n: If you liked this chapter, please consider leaving a vote and commenting about what you liked or what you'd like to see in the next chapters.