TRIGGER WARNING

I remember having this debate as a kid. If I were to jump, I wouldn't die, I wouldn't even be hurt. My sister would then tell me that the water would hit me like cement.

I told her that people jumped off cliffs all the time. Maybe it's the mindset if you're trying to have fun, then the water will take you in as a cushion, if your you're trying to kill yourself, it turns to cement.

Or maybe the fun kills you, and the death makes you truly live. Either way, I am about to find out.

New York City, unless some tourists are driving by, no one will stop me, the rest will let me jump.

People come here to follow their dreams, and when they don't work out, people move to Canada. The friendly people are in Canada, the asshole rich, dream chasing fuckers are here. Meaning my suicide should be a success unless the water screws me over.

Even if I don't die. I will stay in the water, I will refuse to swim to the surface, I will remain underwater until my lungs give up.

I once closer to the edge, but continue to hold on to the railing. My legs dangling, my ass stuck to the cool rail, maybe that's what will screw me other. Myself sticking to the fucking railing.

I am not stalling, I am just trying to take it all in, one last time. I watch the birds, I see the light sky. I the cold air touches my skin. Maybe this is what they mean by y life flashing before my eyes. I just become more aware of my surroundings.

I never thought I would be here, I mean, I kinda knew. I would look towards my future, and I just never say it. I didn't look forward to it, I wanted to be different, and I thought the future would give that.

When I actually looked though, having a family, traveling, living a different way. I seemed so impossible. I knew thought it was because I would kill myself though, but here I was.

I didn't want those things, I didn't want what I had. I tried to leave, to restart, but everywhere I went. It was the same I tried to run. It followed, I decided to get help, I only realized how shitty things were.

10 last seconds in the world, 10 last seconds of hell.

6 last seconds

4

3

2

1I don't stick to the rail, I just fall through the air. I have no thoughts, I have no Felix in my body. I watch as the world rushes to the sky, and I rush towards the water.

I feel it, scared, a slight regret. Maybe the water will take me in like a pillow, maybe I still want this, perhaps I don't. Maybe I was stalling before.

"Hello, fuck can you hear me?"

My chest has so much pressure, my head has a pudding headache, and I can hear a voice. Rather I have to deal with my broken body in heaven, or I am in hell. There is also the slight chance that I didn't kill myself.

The pressure begins to rush towards my head, not adding to my headache, but shooting out of my mouth. A force puts me onto my side. I feel like I am reverse drowning. Throwing up uncontrollably with no air.

Then it stops, and my eye open.

I see the sunrise first, followed by the outline of the city. I stare at it until I am forced to look towards the voice.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" A man says

For a split second, I think he's an angel, he's perfect, gorgeous.

"I feel like shit."

"Yeah, that's why you jumped right?"

"I feel like shit from hitting the water."

"Right, did you regret it."

"What a stupid question," I say, but my answer is yes

"I was just out here on my river boat, saw you. I was trying to yell at you when you were up there, but you clearly didn't hear me. I pulled you out of the water, the moment you went in. You were unconscious, maybe from impact, maybe your body shut down in the air because you were so scared. I don't know."

I Know most people would look at him and say that he's an asshole, but I don't say that.

"Thank you," I say

"Yeah." He smiles, his smile tells me he is an Angel. One too pure for this world.

"I think we should get you to the hospital."

I just nod and then sit there in silence for the rest of the ride.

"Whats your name?" He asks pulling me out fo the boat.

"Piper."

"I am Norman." He says.

"Well thank you, again," I say.

"Yeah." He says looking right into my eyes. We walk over to his truck. He hops me in, and then we head to the hospital.

Thanks for all those who followed me and have bene supporting me. I hope you all liked this. I made this a pretty long imagine (about 300 words longer than usual.) Again, if you have ideas/requests/ want to help brain storm some ideas that would be much appreciated, please message me.