Choti-Choti baatein yunhi aate-jaate
Yaadein sehlaake jaati hai
Raaton ko sirhaane baasi muskaane
Mujhko Sula ke jaati hai
Milna nahin hai mumkin itna bataaun lekin
Hum Phir mile kyun hain
Tujhko bula naa paaun
Tujhko Bhula naa paaun
Yeh silsile kyun hain
Sab kuch wahi hai, par kuch kami hai
Teri aahatein nahi hai
Sab kuch wahi hai, par kuchh kami hai
Teri Aahatein nahi hai. Nahin hai

═❋═❋═

Everyone wishes for love who would bring the best in them and yet fall in love with their worst everyone wishes for love where they can lean on the shoulder and the person would just hold them sitting in silence listening to each other's heartbeats and falling in love all over again.

I know I have always wished for such love and I had that love but now everything is lost. Though I'm learning not to drown in my worries when my fears are wrapping me in them, the burden of my emotions is getting heavier maybe my family is right maybe I should get married again but my heart is not ready to move on.

What if I start to love again and that person is also taken away from me?

Will I be able to forget and move on?

The first time where my mind and heart are agreeing on something.

I pour some more tea into the plastic cup curling myself into a ball as I pulled over Anay's favorite sweater it still smells like him, every part of him lingers in me, and everyone expects that I should leave this behind, and live my life with some other man.

How do you tell your heart that it's time to love someone else because the person you have always been in love with is gone?

I know it will get easier but I'm not so sure about being with someone else will make it easier or maybe it will. I just want...I just want things to be a little bit easier for me, closing my eyes I can feel the cold breeze playing with my hair sitting here looking at the city away from all the cacophony is what I love about this place.

When I'm sitting up here I can hear my thoughts and sometimes everyone wants to be alone with their thoughts "Mihika" a frown plays on my forehead as I heard Maa's voice.

"Maa?" She moves in my direction.

"Anay loved coming up here, he told me once or twice about this place and he also told me about the time he brought you here," she says looking at the surroundings.

I didn't know that anyone knew about this place except me and him but i'm glad someone knows though since Anay is gone I always find myself alone in every corner of this city except up here. This is the safest place and closest one where I feel Anay is with me holding my hand our fingers intertwined, my head resting on his shoulder as I share everything that has happened with me in the whole day, and he shares about his day.

She sat down beside me I took out another plastic cup from my bag and pour some tea for her "I didn't know that anyone else except us knew about this place".
"Mihika I will get straight to the point," Maa says, after silence for a brief moment to which I just hummed in response.

"I know it's not easy for you or anyone else to accept the fact that Anay is gone and Padmini going to jail doesn't dwindle our pain it will be there but each one of us has to learn how to live with that" her voice filled with love and concern for me.

"Your parents, me, and your Papa Ji we cannot let you live your life like this either, you still have so many things to do".

"Mihika jab aap jisse Pyar Karte hai agar vo Chala jaaye iska Matlab yeh nahi Hota ki aapki Zindagi vahi theher gayi hai, mai jaanti hu jo dard tumhe mehsoos ho Raha hai vo itni asani se khatam nahi hoga par beta yeh akele rehne se bhi nahi jaayega" she adds.

"Aur yeh hum bhi jaante hai Viraj ya koi aur vo jagah Kabhi nahi bhar paayega Jo Anay chodh k Gaya hai par uss dard ko Kam karne ki koshish to kar Sakti ho na" she continued.

I didn't interrupt her not that my silence means I'm agreeing with her but I'm not denying that she is right but I'm not in the right place to get married and live happily ever after with Viraj when it was supposed to be with Anay.

"We are not asking you to forget everything, about the moments you spent with Anay or your love for him, I know Viraj can never be Anay but you are not that Mihika anymore beta you have changed, grown maybe this Mihika can give him a chance".

"He loves you Mihika I have seen in his eyes, when you were crying after the courtroom the hurt was clear in his eyes seeing you hurt, bache you don't get to see or have such love every day in your life you are lucky to get something so beautiful and magical twice in your life" she chuckles all the while making circles on my knuckles.

I wanted to say something but wasn't sure what will be the right words my thoughts distorted all felt like mindless confusion, part of me wants to believe everything and agree to this marriage but a part of me wants to run away from here.

Running away is never an answer sane part of my mind screams.

"We or Viraj are not going to force you into doing anything take your time I know this is a big step, and it shouldn't be taken in a haste" she smiles and places a kiss on my head.

I nodded my head and after sitting for a while in silence Maa left me alone with my thoughts.

I dialed Viraj's number which he picks up on the second ring "everything alright?" I chuckled in my head at how he always thinks that I'm in some kind of trouble.
"Everything is alright, but can we talk not on call in person".

"Yes of course whenever you want" he replies instantly.
"Okay, I'll text you the address" I replied and hung up the call.

∆∆∆

I reached ten minutes ahead of the time I told Viraj to be here and to say I was freaking out would be an understatement my mind was going into a frenzy with all the crazy thoughts which were running like a loop.

"Hey" Viraj's low and deep voice put a stop to my conflicted thoughts.

"What is this place?" He asks as he looked around before standing face to face.
"Anay and I used to come here often whenever we needed time away from everyone" I explained hastily to which he didn't say anything sometimes it is hard to read his face.

"So what you wanted to talk about?" He asks sitting down.

"Us...uh I wanted to talk about us" my voice was high and pitcher at the end.

He just looked at me and I was trying to understand what he is thinking "so...um - - I need time with everything you, this marriage proposal I can't magically fall in love with you or anyone overnight I have loved Anay since I understood the meaning, the feeling of being in love and I don't see it happening with anyone else" I explained to him as I fidget with the corner of my dupatta.

He wasn't saying anything which kind of was making it easier for me to express what I'm feeling " I understand my family's concern and I'm sure for whatever reason they have thought of us getting married it is the right one but I need time to heal my heart, bring myself to understand and I can only do that alone without anyone's help because this is my fight against me and my heart no one else's" I prolonged.

"Can I?" He asks looking at my hand.

I nodded at him, he sat crossing his legs facing me "Mihika I'm ready to wait for however long you want me to because I understand this is not easy" he says moving his finger between us.

"And I would be here for you even if you want me silently supporting you, I know you love Anay and I will never even try to take his place but all I can do is fill the void he left behind in your heart and soul you don't have to carry the weight of your emotions we can do that together but only when you are ready to let me in" his voice soft and low which I have heard before but only around me.

Around everyone else he is tough but he is always calm around me, heat rushes to my cheeks thinking about how I affect him he seems like a different person around me for which I consider myself lucky.

"You can take as much as time you want but I will be here waiting for you with open arms" he hesitantly brings up his hand caressing my jaw and unknowingly I leaned in.

Maybe one day I'll be able to love Viraj but for now, I'm happy with him being with me as my smile which plays on the corner of my lips when he is with me, looking at him like this my heart wants to believe that if I let him love me in the right places all my broken, shattered pieces will be healed and they might learn to love again.

This little gesture of him holding my hand always warms me up, it does something to my heart, I was never a fan of big materialistic things of the world it is always hugs, holding hands, and kisses that makes my heart skip a beat. I was always fascinated by the kind of love where we leave each other notes, pretend I haven't watched some movie or series so we can watch it together with a bowl of popcorn.

We sat there in silence looking at the sunset and after a very long time I was feeling somewhat content in my heart, my thoughts weren't having a conflict about how things will turn out and what will happen next.

I wasn't sure what changed this but I was happy with the change.

••••

Hello and Namaste Everyone!

I know this chapter is very shorter than what I usually write but my readers who have read my other books know I don't drag the chapter unnecessarily I end the chapter where I feel like it should.

Anyway moving on...

What do you think about Mihika and Viraj?