| 72 |

| 𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐀𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚 𝐕𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐜𝐞 |

~ a week later ~

Camille had already signed the house papers in Castle's name the moment he turned eighteen. So he still has his current house. But the thing is, Castle doesn't want to live there anymore.

"There are just too many bad memories there." He admits, absentmindedly drawing a pattern on my thigh with his finger.

"So you want to live here?" I ask.

We're lying on his bed at three a.m. My parents were asleep when I checked before coming into his room in our house.

Dad took a few hours to absorb Castle and me being together. After that, he's being...annoying. He was already pretty annoying but now he's being extra annoying.

Castle bites his bottom lip. "Not really."

I furrow my eyebrows. "You don't want to live here?"

"I love here, Holly," he says, "I love being around you. But sometimes I feel like...this is not my space. I haven't earned to live here."

"That's not what—"

"I know. I know." He cuts me off. "But it just seems really...not okay, you know? Your dad already set me up with a job that pays really well. He let me stay here without any problem. He took me to therapy and paid half my bills. That doesn't sit well with me, Holly. I'm really grateful for what he did but I feel like I'm taking advantage of him."

"But you're not." I argue.

"I know. But this feeling won't go away." He sighs. "So yeah, I was thinking of finding a place for myself."

A momentary feeling of sadness comes over me at the thought of him moving out from our house, but then an idea pops into my mind that has me grinning. "Without my dad at your place, we can do whatever we want when I come to see you."

He rolls his eyes. "We're already doing a lot with him in the house."

"True. True." I shrug. "I'm gonna help you decorate your new place."

"And we're doing that with the money I earn." He states firmly, giving me a pointed look.

I scowl. "Fine."

"I'm serious, Holly. I know you like spending on me, but I need to do things on my own."

"You've always been doing things on your own, Castle." I grip his hand, gazing at his face. "You deserve more."

He looks back down at me. "Then I'm gonna give myself more."

"Fine." I sigh. "But don't stop me if I buy you a few gifts here and there."

"Don't stop me if I do the same."

"Hell no. I love gifts!"

He shakes his head at me, a smile appearing on his face.

Castle shifts onto his side so he faces me. I do the same to face him too. A smile comes on my face at the sight of him. I scoot closer to his body so our faces are closer.

"This year has been really messy, hasn't it?" I whisper.

He nods. "I think it was the best year too."

"Yeah?" I ask.

He nods.

"Why so?"

He looks down at my hand before he lightly presses my fingertips one by one, playing with them. "Because I met a certain someone."

My smile grows. "Oh really? Who?"

"This person has the most amazing smile. This person is really annoying and doesn't know when to quit but I know how to deal with that. This person always makes me feel like I'm at home and that I can let loose and relax."

My heart grows warm. "Do I know this person?"

He nods.

"Who is this special person?" I scoot closer to him, peering at his face.

He smiles at me. "Elias Versace."

My smile instantly vanishes.

A scowl spreads across my face. This fucking bitch.

"Fine. Go sleep with my dad then." I move to get off the bed.

Castle laughs, his hand encircling my wrist to keep me from leaving. "I was kidding. I was kidding."

"No. No. I get it. You're in love with my Dad and you want to sleep with him and marry him and have his babies. That's alright by me." I half-heartedly try to tug my wrist free from his grip. "Don't let me come between you both."

"Holly, I was kidding." He's still laughing. He always laughs so cutely. Makes me wanna pounce on him and suck that mouth.

"But I'm not. Go live your merry life with my Dad." I state.

"Okay, fine. I'm sorry!"

I look back at him to see him grinning widely.

"How can I date you when you're in love with my Dad?" I ask, keeping a serious face.

Castle's grin falters a little. Silence falls in the room as his gaze suddenly carries heavy emotions as he stares at me. His grip on my wrist loosens, slowly moving upwards to clasp my hand. He doesn't say anything for a long moment, making me think he's not gonna say anything at all.

But then in a small voice, he whispers hesitantly, "He's not the one I'm in love with."

What?

Every joke on my mind falls apart, replaced by shock and bafflement. It's like his words entered my body and paralyzed me and all I can do is stare at him with wide eyes while I try to process what he just said.

I wrack my brain for a response, trying to place all my thoughts into one sentence but all that comes out is a whispered, "What?"

He stares at me, his gaze unblinking. I can see the effort that takes him because Castle would never say something like that openly and still stare at me. He would be taking his words back. He would be changing the topic. Or he would be telling me to get lost.

But he's staring. He's trying to hide his nervousness and waiting for my response. He's trying so hard to hold my gaze and not hide away.

"Castle." My voice comes out low and unsteady. "What did you say?"

He swallows slowly, his grip on my hand tightening. "Holly...I..."

My eyes remain on him, eagerly. I perfectly understood what he meant but I still want to hear it. I need to hear it.

"I...um..." He fumbles around with his words. The block he has on his nervousness slowly slips the more seconds pass. "I..." He looks around as if looking for help.

I tighten my grip on his hand, making him meet my eyes. His words silence altogether when he sees the intensity in my gaze.

Then he breathes out a single long breath.

"I love you."

Oh fuck.

I can't breathe. I can't move. It's like my lungs lost all oxygen in one single breath and I can't breathe anymore. Different emotions hit me from every angle, making me feel too much at once. I need to hear it again. I need to release the breath I'm holding. But more importantly, I need to hear it again.

I feel like someone grabbed me and placed me on top of the world where I can suddenly do everything. Fuck, what is this guy making me feel?

I know what he's making me feel.

The gates of Castle's nervousness finally bursts apart, because he starts. "I—I mean I've known for a while that I loved you. No person would feel absolutely broken at the thought of someone being away for three months. But I did. I can't stop thinking about you. At all. Even when you're close to me, I need you closer and it—it's just—I can't imagine life without you anymore and I—"

He gets cut off when my lips come over his in a slow, sweet kiss. My heart thrums. It feels too full. It feels too big. Way too big to fit in my chest. My lips move over his, wanting to crush him into me. My body quivers with joy and happiness. All because of this guy in front of me.

Pulling back, a smile spreads across my face. Castle blinks at me, in a daze from our kiss but also nervous.

I can't help it. My hands slide around his neck, pulling him closer for another kiss. A low moan sounds from his throat when I pull his lips between mine, kissing him as slowly and torturously as possible.

Breaking the kiss, I pull back slightly and gaze into his deep hooded eyes. My insides jumble with excitement, happiness, peace and something so much more. I wanna take laps around the country. I wanna go up to someone and break their bones. I wanna kiss Castle so fucking hard until he's bruised with it. I have so much energy suddenly.

I'm nearly shaking when I say, "I love you, too, Castle."

He smiles. Somewhat in relief but a whole lot like in bliss.

"Now come here and kiss me again." I say before pulling him in for another kiss.

The kiss turns different. It turns much deeper and more passionate than before. My heart pulsates with his as my tongue glides over his lips, slipping past them and tangling with his own. My hands fist his hair, angling his head in a way to allow me to kiss him deeper.

A moan slips from Castle's throat that instantly turns me the fuck on. I slide my leg over his hip, pulling my body until I'm on top of him, pressing my chest to his without breaking the kiss.

His hands roam over my back before slipping under my shirt and gripping my waist. He always holds me there whenever we do something like this. And I love it.

His hands move towards the hem of my shirt and I quickly help him tug it off before slamming my lips back on his. His hands find bare skin and I shiver in delight when he doesn't hesitate to run them across the bends and curves of my back and waist. I wasn't wearing a bra so my naked chest presses against his.

My own hands slip under his hoodie, feeling his skin slightly jagged and rough in a few places because of all his scars.

I pull away from the kiss only to ask, "Can I take this off?"

He nods, and I tug at his hoodie. He leans forward for a few seconds allowing me to easily slide the top over his head. We've gotten way more naked than this but even still, there's always this need to make sure Castle is alright with whatever I do.

My mouth moves down, kissing the underside of his jaw, causing a breathy gasp to escape his lips. His hands rake through my hair as my mouth moves to his neck. He moans when I suck his skin into my mouth, biting it before licking over his neck leisurely.

My mouth moves down, kiss his chest, down his stomach to the waistband of his sweatpants. I grab the waistband, peering up at his eyes. He nods then I pull his sweatpants down. My mouth immediately turns dry, staring at his length.

"If you have any restrictions, you better get them out now." I groan low in my throat.

He looks down at me, silent for a long moment. "Are we going to...have sex?"

"We're doing whatever you allow me to, Castle. So state your rules and restrictions now. You do realize this is tempting me so fucking bad." I grab his dick, making him slightly jump under my touch.

Castle licks his bottom lip in hesitation. He stares at me, in thought, remaining silent for so long that it nearly kills me.

"No restrictions," he finally says.

I blink.

What did he say?

"Wait what?"

He sets his mouth in a firm line, nodding once. "No restrictions, Holly."

I let go of his dick and sit up, crawling back to him.

"No restrictions?" I question.

He nods.

I peer at his face to make sure his heart agrees with what he's saying. "Meaning you're ready?"

He nods. "Yeah."

"Are you sure, Castle? You don't have to do this just because we did our little confession today."

"I'm sure." He states, firmly.

My hands come over his face, pulling him in a long deep kiss. "You tell me to stop when it gets too much for you, alright?"

He nods.

Gazing at his eyes for a few more seconds, excitement pools low in my stomach making me grin. "You have no idea how long I waited for this."

He gives me a nervous look.

"No need to be nervous." I run my hands through his hair. "Just one word and I'll stop everything. Got it?"

He nods.

"Good." I say then drop my voice into a low command. "Now back against the headboard and eyes on me."

Anticipation and anxiousness flares in his eyes, but even more is the desire. I slide back down his body, settling myself on his thighs. His eyes are wide and waiting as he watches me. My hands circle his length, making him stiffen beneath me.

"Relax." I murmur, softly.

I squeeze him slightly, getting the feel of him. Slowly, I trail my hand up and down, squeezing and kneading in some places. Castle's hands remain tense on either side of him.

I work my hands around him, feeling him getting harder underneath my touch. Within a few moments, his shoulders slump down in pleasure when my hands move faster. He leans against the headboard, breathing slightly heavier than before.

"There you go." My voice comes out as a low hum. "Relax. Just like that."

I move my hands for a couple more minutes, getting him ready and wet. Castle watches my hands the whole time with fascination and yearning. When he seems ready enough, I settle myself lower on his legs. Then I bring my mouth down.

His hands jerk to my sheets, gripping them in his fists when I take him in whole, sucking him into my mouth. My tongue flicks against his head, licking him up and down before sucking him back into my mouth.

A noise escapes Castle's mouth. Something between a moan and a pleading. His thighs start squirming and I have to hold him down as I work my mouth along his length. He makes more of those sounds when I remove him from my mouth and pepper soft teasing kisses up and down. His hips unknowingly raise up, wanting more.

My heart feels full and delighted, watching him squirm and needy beneath me. He looks so fucking sexy right now with his glasses slipping halfway down his nose, his head thrown back against the headboard and his hands gripping the sheets. His hips continue to squirm, wanting more of me. Tiny breaths come out in needy gasps from his mouth. I can literally come just by watching him like this.

I suck him back into my mouth. He lets out a whimper when I hollow my cheeks and take him completely in, his length hitting the back of my throat. When I feel he's hard enough, that's when I start the real work.

My hands wrap around his base, squeezing him as I suck him further into my mouth. I feel him pulse and that only makes me want to go harder. Castle jerks under me, a moan falling from his lips. He can't stop squirming.

"Holly..." He whimpers. Then moans. "Holly. Fuck..."

His eyes fall shut, squeezing tightly. His hands grip the sheets in a death grip as he tries his best to remain quiet.

I pull my mouth off him, getting his attention. "Eyes on me, love"

The nickname must've done something to him because I feel him twitch in my hands. His eyes open and focus on me. His heavy and hooded eyes. The look in them makes me ache between my legs.

My mouth goes down again, kissing every inch of him before sucking him back into my mouth again. His head hits the back of my throat, making me moan.

"I hope you're really ready because—fuck," I groan with a rasp. "I can't wait any longer."

Castle's barely able to reply. His breathing is heavier, and his chest heaves up and down as if he ran a marathon.

"Hey." I smile up at him, making him meet my eyes, "You good?"

He nods.

"You sure?" I question gently.

He nods again.

"Did you enjoy that?"

A blush covers his face in an instant.

"Yeah." He mumbles.

"Good." My smile widens excitedly. "You're gonna enjoy this even more."

He looks at me in anticipation. I didn't forget his huge boner right in front of me. Far from that. I'm gonna make him feel so good.

Raising myself onto my knees, I pull down my shorts along with my underwear. A sharp inhale appears from Castle when my body is completely bare and on display for him.

I tug off my bottoms quickly, discarding them on the side of the bed. Looking back at Castle, I chuckle when I see his eyes taking me in. His face is red and the desire in them is so deep. It makes me want to remain like this forever.

When he realizes I'm staring back at him, his eyes quickly snap up to my face, embarrassed.

"Aww, Castle." I crawl towards him, giving him an eyeful as I do so. His eyes are wide, but they don't move from my face. I settle my knees on either side of his thighs. My hand comes up to his face, running my fingers across his cheek. "Didn't I tell you?" My lips near his mouth, brushing against his soft skin before I pull back to give him a lustful look. "There's no shame in desiring."

"There's no shame at all when it comes to you." He retorts back, breathily.

A grin spreads across my face. "Life's too short to be shameful. Now remain just like that against the headboard and give me a fucking kiss."

His eyes flare in passion before his lips close over mine, pulling them between his. My hands snake around his neck, pulling myself closer so that our naked chests press against each other. My center comes directly over his and we both moan into each other's mouth at the feel of pleasure that zaps through us.

I kiss him deeper, twirling and stroking my tongue against his while my hand reaches down to grab his dick. Castle groans into my mouth when I start stroking him.

I pull away from the kiss only to say. "I'm on the pill."

He nods, before putting his mouth back on mine without a word. The act surprises me and I can't help but chuckle. "Really needy, aren't you?" I breathe against his lips.

"You said there's nothing to be shameful about."

"And I said correct." I state before plunging my tongue into his mouth, deepening the kiss. Castle's back remains plastered to the headboard as I kiss him. My hand guides his dick to my entrance, letting him feel the heat and wetness emitting from there.

"Feel how much I want you?" I groan against his lips.

His eyes dart down to see and a flush spreads across his face. I put my finger under his chin and tilt his face up so he meets my eyes.

"Last time. Are you sure you want to do this?"

His gaze softens all of a sudden and there's a vulnerability to his eyes. "I love you." He whispers them so lowly; I almost don't hear him. "I'm not used to this."

"Sex? Obviously not, you're a virgin."

He shakes his head. "Not that. This...this softness. The way you care for me. I still can't believe this is real, Holly."

My own gaze softens at his words. "I'll always care for you. No matter what you think about yourself, I'll always be here."

His eyes lock on mine. Then he gives a firm nod. "I'm ready."

I raise my hips and guide his dick to my entrance, bracing my other hand on his shoulder. Then in one swift motion, I sink down.

I moan. His eyes nearly pop out of their sockets before a whimper escapes his mouth. My center pulses with pleasure as he fills me completely. It hurts a bit but fuck, I like it rough too. I just want to keep going.

"Want me to keep going?" I ask.

He nods, wordlessly.

Nodding back, I place both my hands on his shoulders, before raising myself up a couple of inches and sinking back down.

This time Castle groans, his eyes squeezing shut when my walls clench around his length, taking him deeper. I raise myself again, my nipples brushing against his chest, making them hard. This time, I lower myself a little faster, shuddering at the feel of pure bliss crawling up my spine.

"Want me to keep going?" I ask, barely able to keep my own eyes open with him deep inside me.

He nods, his head leaning back against the headboard. "Please." He says with a rasp.

I raise my hips again and slam back down. A moan tears out my mouth while Castle gasps. His hands fly to my hips, gripping my skin as he nods. "Keep going."

I move. Pulling up then slamming back down. Castle's eyes squeeze shut as if he's savoring the feeling. His palms feel amazing on my hips as I move. What feels even more amazing are my breasts that rub against his chest, turning them painfully harder.

Another moan tears free from Castle's mouth when I slam back down. My hands slide around his neck, pressing my lips to his swollen red ones as I quicken my pace and don't stop.

He breathes heavily into my mouth as I ride him faster. His hands tighten on my hips, not to stop me but to feel me move. His lips move clumsily over mine as pleasure takes over his senses. My senses are dull too, to everything except the feel and presence of Castle. My legs quiver slightly as I raise myself again before pushing back down. A moan lodges from my mouth.

"This feels so fucking good."

He nods. His eyes are heavy with passion and desire as he looks at me.

"I miss sex so much." A sigh escapes my mouth. "I hope you're not expecting anything after this. I don't have sex with the same guy twice so get dressed right after and leave."

He raises an eyebrow. "Am I allowed to shed a few tears?"

"Cry your heart out." I nod.

"What about name-calling?"

"Give me your best." I grin.

"Should I create a fight and right before you say something, make a dramatic exit?"

"I'll play the dramatic music."

"Deal." He nods.

I break into breathy laughter. My gaze locks on his to find enjoyment in his eyes. There are no traces of tension or nervousness in him now. There's only content, desire and something much deeper.

I feel my heart flutter in my chest. The things this guy makes me feel...it feels so fucking good. I always knew there was something about him the moment I was trapped with him in that library. I was always fascinated and amused by him and fuck, now I love him. It feels amazing. It really fucking does.

I slam back down again, making a breathy gasp tear free from Castle's mouth. The sound draws my attention to his dark swollen lips. I move again, making him groan. My focus turns sharper in drawing out those sounds. My mouth pulls his lips between mine, wanting to capture his noises.

My pace increases, making me breathe heavier too. Our kiss turns desperate, eager as if we're holding each other together while I rock my hips faster and harder. Heat pools low in my stomach making me groan. I'm almost there.

My walls clench around his length and I feel him pulse inside me. My breasts plaster against his chest, rubbing them along as I move up and down. Our breaths mix together. Sweat coats our skin. Castle's hands run along the sides of my waist. An inaudible cry escapes my mouth when his head hits some deep part within me. My teeth bites down his bottom lip, making him whimper.

My mouth moves lower, kissing and sucking his neck and collarbone. My face scrunches up in pleasure when I feel the muscles near my spine tightening. My pace is fast but not too fast to draw out the feeling. I feel his shoulders bunching up beneath my hands and know he's close too. We try keeping extremely quiet but it's hard when every movement causes us to breathe heavily or moan.

My arms wind around his neck, pushing him to my lips as I fuck him harder. I kiss him harder too like my life depends on it. My moan comes out louder when he kisses back with the same hardness, biting my lips before licking them. His hips start moving upwards to meet my rhythm. It doesn't take long after that before my walls clench tightly around him, and I come apart with cry.

"Oh fuck." I gasp.

Castle follows after, his hips jerking into me as he comes. Our mouths fuse together the whole time, trying to swallow each other's sounds. His hands are tight bands around my waist as if he's holding me for dear life. My hands are around his neck, wanting him as close to me as possible as we tremble and shake in each other's arms.

For a moment, we both remain like that, with his face pressed on the curve of my neck and shoulder and my head leaning against his. Our arms remain around each other as we try to catch our breath. He's still inside me and I have no intention of pulling myself up and leaving him.

A few minutes later, he pulls his head back, looking at me with heavy, blissful eyes.

I bring my hand up to brush away a few strands of his dark hair that sticks to his forehead. His head nearly rolls off when he leans into my touch tiredly.

I chuckle. "Looks like you're spent."

He nods, breathing softly through his mouth. "That was...good."

"That was amazing." I correct him.

He nods.

"Let's go and clean up." I say, placing my hands on either side of his face and giving him a small, sweet kiss.

He returns the kiss, softly.

He takes a shower in his room while I sneak upstairs to my bedroom to take one. We could've taken a shower together, but I feel like Castle wouldn't want that much intimacy all at once.

Soon though. He'll get comfortable with this soon. And when he does, damn him if he thinks he's ever escaping me.

After taking a quick shower, I dress into my night clothes before sneaking back downstairs into his room. He's already sitting on his bed, waiting for me.

He looks up when I enter and a flush spreads across his face. He averts his eyes away from me. I shut the door behind me before walking straight to him. Pushing him backward by his shoulders, I climb on top of him before nestling my head on his chest and wrapping my arms around him.

"Don't be shy after what we did." I murmur to him.

"I thought you didn't sleep with the same guy twice." His arms come around my neck, pulling me closer to his body.

"I guess I'm sort of addicted to you."

"Addicted? Only after a one-night stand?"

"Mhmm. Your dick's that good."

I can feel his skin getting warm. "Shut up, Holly."

I chuckle. "I'm not lying."

"Go to sleep." He dismisses me.

"Satan doesn't need sleep."

"What does Satan need then?"

"Blood of virgin males. You offering?"

His mouth comes down to my ear, whispering. "I'm no longer a virgin."

"You're exceptional. I can take your blood too."

"I think you already took a lot tonight." He murmurs.

"I need more. I always need more when it comes to you."

His hand comes on top of my head, slowly running his fingers down my hair. His chest moves up and down softly as he breathes.

"Same." He whispers, in a low voice.

★・・・・・・★

You people finally got what you've been waiting for!

There's more in the next chapter so don't think this is the end yet!

Don't forget to vote and comment and let me know your reactions!

Words: 4,700

Date of publishing: 19th August 2023