| 01 |

| 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐀 𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐀𝐂𝐄 |

All my hopes and dreams shatter when Mrs. Julie slams the test result on the table. An expression between a wince and anger crosses me as I stare at the big taunting 'F'.

"You couldn't have made that 'F' any bigger, couldn't you?" I mutter.

She looks up at me from her desk, her dark blue glasses slipping halfway down her nose. "You failed."

I can fucking see that.

Julie is kind enough to give me a few seconds of self-loathing before she shatters my dreams further with her next sentence.

"You can't continue cheerleading anymore."

That sentence alone sends me into a wave of panic. "One more chance."

"You've said that before too." She gives me a weary look.

Like a hundred times, I know.

"But this time I'm actually serious," I say. "One more test."

She shakes her head. "Holly–"

"You know I can't quit cheerleading."

"Then you should've thought about studying and passing this test. I literally only asked you to pass it."

My hands clench into fists. She did give me too many chances, and I've always taken her lightly. Studying and I just do not belong on the same page. It's not that I don't wanna study, it's just that I get distracted easily and eventually my boredom carries me to other stuff.

But right now, I'm ready to get home and surround myself with a pile of books just thinking of how I'm gonna lose the position as Cheer captain.

"One more chance." I plead, making sure to show how desperate I am this time.

Julie stares up at me with a resigned expression.

This school gives equal focus to both sports and education. It makes sure that while students are interested in sports and put their efforts into it,  they don't lag behind in their studies and education.

I'm plenty good at sports but in studies...not so much.

I give Julie my best look of determination and desperation, hoping she'll crack once again under my stare.

It doesn't surprise me when she finally does after a few beats with a loud sigh.

Relieve starts to melt my expression but she quickly holds up a finger.

"One," she emphasizes. "Last chance."

I nod rapidly.

"Last and final." She declares.

"Last and final." I nod.

"If you fail this test again, you'll have to quit. You know the rules, Holly. If you're failing, you can't continue cheerleading."

"I know," I grumble, hating to be reminded again and again.

"Also this time you have to get a 'C'."

"What?" My mouth drops open. I frown. "C? You said 'D' last time!"

"Yes, but apparently the idea of at least scoring a D wasn't that motivating to you." She gives me a pointed look. "So a C it is then."

My mouth gapes open. "This is just not fair, Julie."

"Life's never fair." She smiles sweetly at me. "Oh, by the way, it's Mrs. Julie."

I narrow my eyes at her. "And here I thought you were my favourite teacher, Jules."

"Mrs. Julie." She emphasizes before grabbing a stack of papers and tidying her table. "Sorry, but I can't do anything if your grades are gonna drop this low. At least try passing one test."

"I passed the test you gave two weeks ago." I point out.

She narrows her eyes at me over her dark-blue-rimmed glasses. "You cheated."

"So? I still passed, didn't I?"

Julie sighs. "Why don't you just find someone to tutor you?"

"You?"

"Not me." She quickly says. 

"Where am I supposed to find one then?" I ask.

"Don't you have like magic charming powers like you claimed you had last time? Charm someone into tutoring you."

"Who the hell charms someone into tutoring? Were you charmed into teaching?"

She shakes her head. "Just go ask someone."

"None of my friends will tutor me. Fuck, they're failing themselves."

"Language." She scolds before shrugging. "Ask someone else then."

"Suggestions?"

"You could start with the library to find someone. Usually, every study group goes there."

"Okay, so I just go there and grab someone to tutor me." 

"Ask them politely." She emphasizes. 

"And then you'll give me the grade?" 

"If you pass, yeah." 

"You know I worked really hard to get to that position." 

Since I was a little girl exactly. 

She nods. "I know, Holly. I know it's difficult for you to focus and study. You can't be good at everything. A lot of my other kids have such great talents but they fail miserably too because studying theoretically is not their thing." 

The words 'can't be good at everything' and 'fail miserably' make me wince so hard. I hate the word failure. My mind always thinks that if you really want to achieve something, failure is never an option. Some people might argue and say 'failure is the road to success'. But it has never been for me. For me, failure has always been a huge cliffside where if I once fall, I fall. There's no satisfaction for me after that even if I succeed because in my mind there's always going to be the thought that I once failed. 

And because Julie used those words, I decide to annoy her. "Did you hear about the rumours that you and Mr. Mark are a couple—"

"And that's when you get out of my class." She cuts me off,  snatching a stack of papers from her desk and stuffing them into her bag.

"It's funny." I laugh. "You and Mark."

"I'm married." She glares at me.

"That's why it's funny." I grin.

"Get out of my class." She jerks her head towards the door.

I flash her a cheeky smile before grabbing the damned test result from her table and walking out of her class.

"And make sure you cover up next time!" Her voice follows me out of the class. "It's against the dress code."

I pointedly ignore her, making my way down the hallway.

My gaze lands on the test result in my hand, and my whole mood drops again when I look at the big red 'F'.

I squeeze my eyes shut in weariness, blowing out a breath.

It's fine. Everything's fine. Just find someone. Study. Pass. And you'll be good until you die. 

I also have to think about how my dad is gonna fucking flip when I show him this.

A sigh comes out of my mouth before I drag my feet towards the library. Hopefully, I find someone or else I'm really gonna have to say goodbye to cheerleading.

And everyone knows I'd rather die than do that.

｡☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆｡

I already know my presence in the library is foreign to almost every student here. Because when I enter, almost the whole room looks up at me as if I'm wearing a clown costume.

I ignore their stares and instead scan the room. My eyes flick from one student to another, every one of them is either gaping, silently gazing, or pointedly ignoring me.

I spot a girl in the corner, reading some kind of fantasy book with a vivid dark book cover before walking up to her. Her dark hair is tied into two Dutch braids and I admire her hair.

Growing up, I've always wanted dark hair. Being Blonde has its perks, but I think I'll look hotter as a brunette.

I stop in front of her.

She looks up and when she realizes who she's looking at, her eyes widen. She silently elbows her friend, who looks up from her book and has the same reaction. 

"Hey." I smile.

The Dutch Braid girl's eyes couldn't possibly widen even more. "Uh, me?"

I nod. "Will you tutor me?"

I couldn't have been more wrong. Her eyes, in fact, could widen even more. They widen so much; I'm worried people are gonna think of them as plates and serve food on them.

"Um..." She stutters, not being able to form a word. She's barely making eye contact with me.

My smile dims. I sigh and shake my head, turning around to leave. "Never Mind."

Right before I can get out of earshot, the girls erupt into a conversation.

"Was that Holly?" 

"Yup. Did she just ask you to tutor her?" 

"I know, right?"

"Good thing you didn't agree. She'll literally kill you if you say a single bad thing about her." 

"Yeah, I know. Remember when she slammed that kid's head into the wall because he—"

I walk away, not wanting to hear more of it. 

I try with another person sitting a few tables ahead and he has the same reaction.

This won't do.

How am I supposed to find a tutor when people are afraid of me or refuse to even look me in the eye?

I need a tutor.

And I need one fast.

My next test is in twelve days.

And as much as I hate studying, I also adore my position as the Cheer Captain. The way my chest swells up with pride whenever I think of my success; The hard work and efforts it took me to reach my position; I can't let it slip away.

I've always been inspired by cheerleaders since I was a child. The way they do spine-cracking moves while still maintaining a smile fascinated me in more ways than anyone could imagine.

I walk around the library, still asking people, but they all either straight-up refuse or don't even acknowledge me. 

A few minutes later, I get irritated. Seriously? I'm not even that bad! Sure, I don't have the perfect record of maintaining peace and being a calm person, but I haven't even done anything to anyone here. 

"Could you stop making noise?" A guy seated at a table a few chairs beside me speaks up. "You're disturbing everyone."

"What do you mean?" I look down at him. "I didn't utter a word."

His jaw immediately slackens when he takes a look at my face. He stares at me for a couple of beats before snapping out of whatever trance he was in and gesturing towards my feet.

I look down at my pink heels.

A smile appears on my face. "Cute, aren't they?"

"They're making a lot of noise." He rubs the back of his neck.

"You want me to walk barefoot then?" 

His eyes widen a fraction at the look I'm sending him. He shakes his head. "Sorry. Please go ahead." He quickly looks away from me, burying his nose back into his book.

Nope. He can't tutor me either. I still give him credit for pointing out my shoes though.

I start walking again and realize my heels sure are making their sweet sound. While I adore this sound, it's really not fair for me to interrupt others.

Deciding to make this quick, I plan on asking the librarian if she can help me.

I walk towards her table where she's already talking to a tall, lean guy.

Standing behind him, I admire my nails while I wait.

"Are you sure there isn't anything you can do?" He asks.

"I'm sorry but I don't think there are any jobs available for you on the school campus." The teacher says.

"Nothing? I can assist the school in accounting. I've learned enough about it. I can help."

Accounting, huh? How does it feel to be smart in academics? I can never know. I do know that I can lift two girls on each of my arms. So if anyone ever needs something heavy to be lifted, I'm your girl. 

The teacher sighs. "Why don't you ask the principal about it?"

"Can't you put in a word for me?"

"I can't help you in any way." The librarian says in an apologetic tone.

A moment of silence passes as the guy remains silent.

"Alright."

He turns around to walk away but apparently, he doesn't see me standing right behind him because he walks straight into me.

I stumble back on my heels and would've fallen back if he hadn't immediately clamped his hand on my shoulder, steadying me.

"Oh sorry. 'Didn't see you there."

I look up, ready to cuss at him but stop when I see the irritated look on his face.

Oh damn, isn't he cute?

He's got blue annoyed eyes with his dark eyebrows set in a little frown. His hood is up covering his dark hair except for the small part at the front that's peeking out.

He must've caught me checking out his face because his frown deepens.

"Um...excuse me." With that, he leaves my shoulder and walks past me.

I turn to look after him.

He sure is tall with a slim body clad in a dark hoodie and black jeans. He doesn't stop walking until he reaches the corner of the room and sits down on a chair, pulling out his earphones from his pocket and plugging them in.

He reaches to take out a textbook from his bag but pauses. Lifting his head, his eyes meet mine.  He probably sensed me staring.

I expect him to either become nervous or quickly ignore me. It's always the same; they glance at me, they stop, they stare, they realize I'm staring back and then they quickly turn away.

Instead...he doesn't do any of those.

He frowns at me.

My eyebrows almost raise in surprise.

I turn back towards the librarian with a low whistle. "Who is that?" I ask, in an impressed tone.

She doesn't humour me. Doesn't even glance at me. "What do you want?"

"Oh right." I get straight to the point. "Do you know someone who can tutor me?"

At that, her pen stops writing.

She looks up. "Come again?"

"I want someone to tutor me," I repeat.

"Holly Versace." She caps her pen, peering at me. "Is this another prank?"

A grin lights my face. "Oh no, why no, Miss. Why on earth would you think that?"

"Why on earth would I not think that?"

"So is there anyone?" I ask.

"Do I look like I keep track of students who know how to tutor?"

I shrug. "Oh, I don't know. You usually seem to have a lot of free time. You know?" I give a 'no biggie' one-shoulder shrug. "With the Chemistry sir every lunch break."

Her face goes instantly red.

"Don't worry," I whisper. "I haven't told a soul."

I wink at her.

Her face doesn't return to its normal colour though. She's glaring up at me now, fuming in her seat. "Holly Versace—"

I cut her off with a sigh. "Never mind. This is just wasting my time."

I shake my head and turn around, walking away from my still-fuming library teacher who yells at me to come back.

How on earth am I gonna find a tutor and secure a grade 'C' within twelve days?

★・・・・・・★

Hope you people stick around for more! The first few chapters might suck because I legit hate writing the beginning of any book, but I hope it gets better and you people enjoy it. ♡♡♡

Compared to Holly, I'm a VERY academically driven person. I literally CANNOT stand if my grades go below 95%. The self-loathing I go through when I get even a single question wrong in a test ToT.

Also, this story contains a lot of stuff that may make the readers uncomfortable or is unsuitable for certain people. I wanted to make that clear.

I'm a reader who likes reading dark stuff so I kinda wanted to add messed-up stuff in this book.

♥ Hope you people enjoy ♥

Words: 2,300

Date of publishing: 1st March 2023