Parker Matthews | 𝟭𝟵𝟵𝟲
Wiskayok, New Jersey

Parker fumbled with her backpack, one strap dangling over her shoulder and the other dragging against the floor. Lottie's voice echoed through the house, sharp and frantic.

"Parker! We're going to be late!" Lottie shouted from the front door, her foot tapping impatiently on the hardwood floor. "What are you even doing up there?"

"Almost ready!" Parker called back, her voice muffled as she rummaged through the clutter on her desk. She grabbed her keys and a random notebook that she hoped was the right one.

Lottie groaned, tilting her head back dramatically. "We were supposed to leave ten minutes ago! If I get another tardy, I'm getting detention!"

"Okay, okay, I'm coming!" Parker stumbled down the stairs, still zipping up her bag. Her hair was half brushed, her shirt slightly wrinkled, and she had mismatched socks, but she looked relatively presentable.

Lottie gave her a quick look over and sighed. "You couldn't even put on matching socks?"

Parker shrugged sheepishly. "I couldn't find matching ones."

Lottie rolled her eyes and grabbed Parker's arm, dragging her toward the door. "Whatever, you don't have time to change. Let's go!"

As they rushed out to Lottie's car, Parker's mind ticked through her mental checklist. But as the car engine roared to life and Lottie sped out of the driveway, something nagged at the back of her mind.

Her pills.

Her heart sank, but she didn't say anything. They were already late, and Lottie would flip if she asked to turn around.

"Why are you so slow in the mornings?" Lottie asked, glancing at her sister as they hit the main road. "It's like you're moving in slow motion."

Parker forced a laugh, clutching her bag tighter. "I'm just not a morning person."

Lottie huffed but didn't press further, her focus shifting to weaving through traffic. Parker stared out the window, her chest tightening slightly. She told herself it was fine—missing one dose wouldn't be a big deal.

But as they pulled into the school parking lot, Parker couldn't shake the gnawing unease building in her chest. Something about today already felt off, and she couldn't tell if it was the rushing, the forgotten pills, or both.

"Come on," Lottie said, slamming the car door shut. "We might just make it to first period if we run."

Parker nodded, slinging her bag over her shoulder and following her sister toward the building, trying her best to shake the feeling creeping up her spine.

———

Parker and Lottie walked side by side toward the gymnasium. The air smelled faintly of freshly cut grass, and the distant sound of whistles and shouting hinted that the soccer team was already warming up on the field.

Parker shifted her duffel bag on her shoulder, glancing at her sister. "You didn't have to wait for me, you know. You're already late."

Lottie rolled her eyes, adjusting the strap of her own bag. "Yeah, well, someone has to make sure you actually get to practice instead of wandering off."

Parker nudged Lottie with her elbow. "I'm not a kid, Lott."

"Could've fooled me this morning when you spent two hours getting ready."

"Shut up, I'm not a morning person."

Lottie laughed, shaking her head. "I know. You're like nocturnal or whatever."

They reached the school's main doors, Parker hesitated for a moment, glancing toward the gym entrance.

"You okay?" Lottie asked, her teasing tone replaced with genuine concern.

Parker nodded quickly, forcing a smile. "Yeah. I was just thinking about today's routine. Coach is probably gonna kill us if we mess it up again."

Lottie gave her a knowing look but didn't press further. "You'll do fine, you always do." She bumped Parker's shoulder gently. "Besides, your coach can't be scarier than ours. He's pissed at Isa so we're running suicides for every missed goal today."

Parker winced. "Glad I'm not on your team."

"Trust me, so am I." Lottie grinned, then glanced at the field. "Alright, I'll meet you at the car after practice."

Parker nodded, already feeling the slight tug of nerves as she glanced toward the gym doors. "Yeah, good luck out there."

"You too. Don't break a leg—literally." Lottie flashed a quick smile before jogging off toward the field, her cleats clinking faintly with each step.

Parker watched her go for a moment, then took a deep breath and turned toward the gym. The muffled sounds of squeaking shoes and shouted instructions greeted her as she stepped inside.

A couple minutes had passed, and Parker had felt fine up until now. There were no signs of an episode and no warning signals creeping in. But the gym was loud—too loud. The echoes of sneakers squeaking against the polished floor and the rhythmic clap of hands to the beat of the music ricocheted in Parker's skull. Her heart pounded harder than it should have from a simple roundoff. Something was wrong.

Her vision wavered as if the gym's fluorescent lights were flickering, even though they weren't. The edges of her world felt distorted, like she was staring into a warped mirror. Then came the whispers, faint at first, blending with the hum of the gym.

"Parker, focus!" the coach barked from across the room, jolting her back to the present. She forced herself into another routine, but the floor beneath her felt like quicksand. The whispers grew louder, more insistent, twisting into words she couldn't quite understand.

She couldn't stay there.

Without a word, Parker bolted, her sneakers slapping against the floor as she shoved open the gym doors and stumbled into the empty hallway. She clutched at her chest, struggling to breathe, the world spinning around her.

"Parker?"

She whipped her head up to see Van standing a few feet away, her brow furrowed in concern. Van was still in her soccer gear, her cleats dangling from one hand and her duffel slung over her shoulder.

"What's going on? Are you okay?" Van took a cautious step closer, her voice soft but worried.

"I—I'm fine," Parker stammered, backing away until her shoulder hit the wall. The whispers were deafening now, overlapping, one voice rising above the others in a sing-song tone: They're watching you. We're coming.

Her hands flew to her ears. "Stop," she whispered under her breath. "Just stop, please."

Van froze, the duffel slipping from her shoulder and thudding to the floor. "Parker?"

The hallway tilted, and Parker slid down the wall, her knees curling to her chest. Her breaths came in rapid, shallow gasps as the voices grew louder. She tried to ground herself, digging her nails into her palms, but it wasn't working.

Van crouched beside her, her movements hesitant. "What's happening?"

"They won't stop," Parker choked out, rocking slightly. Her voice was barely audible. "I—I can't—"

Van's eyes darted around the empty hallway, panic creeping into her expression. "What won't stop? Parker, what's going on?"

"They're here," Parker whimpered, tears streaking her cheeks. "They're in my head."

Van's hands hovered awkwardly in the air, unsure whether to touch her or keep her distance. "Okay, uh... I don't know what to do, but I'm here, alright? You're safe. It's just me and you."

Parker shook her head violently, her hands clutching her hair as if trying to physically pull the voices out. "They're not real, they're not real, they're not real."

Van's heart raced as she sat down fully, crossing her legs and placing herself in Parker's line of sight. "Parker, listen to me. Whatever's happening, I'm not going anywhere. I promise. Just focus on me, okay?"

Parker's breaths were ragged, but she flicked her eyes toward Van. The voices still screamed in her mind, but Van's steady presence anchored her, even just a little.

"I'm here. I've got you. You're not alone." Van said, trying to keep her voice steady.

Parker let out a broken sob, her body trembling. Slowly, the world began to stabilize, the voices fading into the background like static. She slumped forward, her forehead resting on her knees.

Van hesitated, then placed a gentle hand on Parker's shoulder. "You okay?"

Parker shook her head, her voice hoarse. "No. Not really."

Van nodded, her grip firm but reassuring. "Do you want me to go get Lottie?"

The younger Matthews shook her head. "No, I'm okay."

Parker's breathing was still uneven, but the worst of it had passed. She leaned back against the wall, wiping her tears with her trembling hands. Van sat beside her, legs stretched out, her soccer cleats forgotten on the floor.

"So," Van started hesitantly, her voice soft. "What was that?"

Parker blinked rapidly, forcing herself to meet Van's concerned gaze. "It was a panic attack," she said, her voice unconvincing even to herself. She forced a weak smile. "I guess I just freaked out a little."

Van tilted her head, studying her. "Parker, I'm not an idiot. That didn't look like a panic attack."

Parker's hands clenched into fists, and she stared at the scuffed tiles beneath her. "It's nothing. I'm fine now, okay? Let's just drop it."

Van sighed, leaning her head back against the wall. "Alright, fine. We can drop it, for now. But just so you know," She paused, biting her lip as if debating something. "You can talk to me about anything. I swear I won't judge."

Parker didn't respond, her throat tight with the weight of what she couldn't say.

Van let the silence hang for a moment before breaking it. "You know, I've been keeping something from everyone too."

Parker frowned, glancing at her. "What do you mean?"

Van hesitated, her fingers fidgeting with the hem of her jersey. "No one knows this, but Taissa and I have been together for a couple weeks. Like as in she's my girlfriend together."

Parker blinked in surprise, the confession cutting through her lingering anxiety. "Wait, what?"

Van shrugged, her cheeks reddening slightly. "Yeah. We've been sneaking around, keeping it quiet. I just—it's scary, you know? But I wanted to tell you. You're the only one who even knows about us."

Parker stared at her, unsure how to respond.

Van gave her a small, reassuring smile. "So, yeah. I get it, okay? Whatever you're hiding, whatever's going on, I'm not going to judge."

The sincerity in Van's voice hit Parker like a wave, loosening the grip she'd kept on her secret for so long. Her hands shook slightly as she folded them in her lap. "I have schizophrenia," she said quietly, her voice barely audible.

Van straightened, her eyes wide but calm. "Schizophrenia?"

Parker nodded, biting her lip. "Yeah. I've been dealing with it since I was little. The voices, the hallucinations—they just hit me sometimes, like today. That's what that was." She let out a shaky breath. "You, Lottie, and Mari are the only ones who know. I haven't even told my team."

Van didn't say anything at first, just nodded slowly, processing. "Wow. That's—a lot," she said softly. "But, Parker, that doesn't change anything. You're still you. And I still mean it, I'm here. No judgment."

Parker let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. For the first time in ages, the weight on her chest felt a little lighter. "Thanks," she whispered.

Van nudged her shoulder gently. "Anytime. But I should probably go, I'm already super late to practice."

Van had just started to push herself up when Parker reached out, her hand trembling slightly as she grabbed Van's wrist. "Wait," Parker said, her voice wavering. "There's something else."

Van stopped immediately, settling back down with a curious tilt of her head. "Okay," she said, her tone calm and inviting. "What's up?"

Parker's stomach churned, and she rubbed her palms against her thighs, trying to calm the nerves buzzing in her chest. "I shouldn't be nervous, right?" she said, more to herself than Van. She met Van's gaze with a shaky smile. "I mean, you just said you wouldn't judge me. And you're, you know, with Taissa, so..."

Van's eyebrows lifted slightly, but she stayed quiet, letting Parker find her words.

Parker exhaled sharply, her fingers tapping anxiously against the floor. "Okay, I'm just gonna say it. I'm gay." Her voice cracked slightly, and she winced, her cheeks flushing. "And I've been dating Mari for a year now."

The silence that followed made Parker's heart pound, but it only lasted a second before Van's face lit up with surprise and something close to delight.

"Wait, Mari? As in our Mari?" Van said, a grin breaking across her face.

Parker let out a nervous laugh, her shoulders relaxing just a little. "Yeah, that Mari."

Van leaned back against the wall, shaking her head in disbelief but still smiling. "Wow. I did not see that coming. You and Mari." She turned to Parker, her expression softening. "That's awesome. I think you two make a good couple."

Parker blinked, caught off guard. "You do?"

"Yeah," Van said, nudging her gently. "You're like the perfect balance for her. Mari is well—Mari, and you're like this ball of sunshine."

Parker felt her cheeks heat up, but she couldn't help the small, shy smile that crept across her face. "Thanks, Van. I didn't think it'd feel this good to finally tell someone."

Van grinned, bumping her shoulder. "Anytime. I'm glad you told me. For the record, I'm totally rooting for you two."

Parker laughed softly, the sound light and genuine. "That means a lot."

Van stood up again, extending a hand to help Parker to her feet. "Alright, now we really need to get out of here before someone thinks we're ditching practice."

Parker took her hand, pulling herself up with a quiet nod. "Thanks, Van. For everything."

"You sure you're okay?" Van asked again, her tone cautious but sincere.

Parker nodded, though her posture remained tense. "Yeah, I just don't think I can go back in there right now."

Van shifted her weight, her cleats clinking faintly against the tile floor. "What are you gonna do? Just wait here until practice is over?"

Parker hesitated, her fingers tapping against her arm. "I was actually thinking, do you think your coach would care if I sat and watched your practice instead? I mean, just on the sidelines or something. I don't feel like going home, and I really don't want to go back in there." She gestured vaguely toward the gym.

Van blinked, caught off guard by the request, but then shrugged. "I doubt coach would care. He's pretty chill about stuff like that. As long as you don't try to join in and mess up the drills, he won't even notice." She gave Parker a faint grin. "You don't really scream soccer player anyway."

Parker let out a small, dry laugh, the tension in her shoulders easing slightly. "Yeah, running after a ball isn't really my thing."

"Good. Because trust me, it's harder than it looks," Van teased. Then her tone softened. "But seriously, if sitting by the field will help, go for it. I'll let coach know you're cool to hang out."

Parker nodded, a flicker of relief crossing her face. "Thanks, Van. I just need some space, you know?"

Van gave her a reassuring smile. "I get it. And hey, if you feel like talking, I'm around. Otherwise, just enjoy the view of us running laps and missing passes."

Parker smiled faintly. "Sounds thrilling."

Van laughed and started toward the exit leading to the field. She glanced over her shoulder. "Come on, you can watch us get tortured on the bench."

Parker followed her, the tension in her chest loosening with each step. It wasn't much, but just being out there, away from the gym, felt like the breath of air she desperately needed.

———

Parker followed Van across the sidelines, her duffel bag slung low on her shoulder. The noise from the field was somehow easier to handle than the chaos in the gym, and she was grateful for the open air.

As they approached the benches, Lottie spotted them from the corner of her eye. She furrowed her brow, her ponytail bouncing as she jogged over, cleats thudding softly against the grass.

"Parker?" Lottie called, slowing to a stop in front of them. Her tone was a mix of surprise and concern. "What are you doing here? Don't you have cheer practice?"

Parker shifted on her feet, glancing at Van before meeting Lottie's eyes. "I, uh—I left.

"I found her in the hallway, she was having an episode." Van added.

Lottie's eyes widened, and her gaze darted between Parker and Van. "You told her?" she asked, her voice tinged with surprise.

Van raised her hands slightly, palms out. "Hey, I didn't push her to say anything. She didn't have to tell me. But she did, and it's fine. I'm not gonna say anything to anyone. I can keep a secret."

Lottie stared at her for a moment, her expression unreadable, before her lips curved into a small smile. She nodded, her shoulders relaxing. "Thanks, Van. Really."

Van shrugged, a crooked grin on her face. "Don't worry about it."

Lottie turned back to Parker, her tone softer now. "Are you okay? Do you need anything?"

Parker shook her head, a faint smile tugging at her lips. "I'm fine now. I just didn't want to go back in there, so I asked if I could sit and watch your practice instead."

Lottie studied her for a moment before nodding. "Alright. You can hang out here. But let me know if you need anything, okay?"

"I will," Parker said.

Lottie reached out, squeezing Parker's shoulder briefly before glancing back at Van. "Thanks again. You didn't have to do this."

Van shrugged again, but her grin softened into something more genuine. "We're friends, and that's what friend do, right?"

Lottie smiled, then jogged back toward the rest of the team. Parker watched her go, the weight in her chest easing a little more.

Van nudged her lightly. "See? Told you it'd be fine."

Parker smiled faintly and sat down on the bench, her mind a little quieter as she watched the team prepare for practice.

———

The front door slammed shut with a soft thud, and then there was the sound of hurried footsteps echoing through the hallway. Mari and Parker were racing toward Mari's bedroom, laughing as they dodged the furniture in their path.

Mari was still wearing her soccer uniform, her hair messily pulled back into a ponytail, her face flushed from the suicides she'd ran today. Parker was in her cheerleading uniform, her pompoms left discarded in the hallway, her makeup slightly smeared from her episode in the hallway but somehow still radiating that carefree energy that made Mari's heart race. They'd spent the whole afternoon together, teasing each other, stealing glances in between practice, but now, in the silence of Mari's house, everything felt different.

They reached Mari's room, and without saying another word, they both dove onto the bed, laughing as they tumbled into the blankets. Mari's uniform crinkled as she rolled on her back, Parker's laughter spilling out in a high, light sound that made Mari's chest flutter.

"Okay, wait!" Mari gasped between laughs. "You can't just show up to my house looking like that and expect me not to completely lose my mind!"

Parker grinned, propping herself up on her elbows to look down at Mari, her hair falling in soft waves around her face. "What, this?" she asked, pulling at the edge of her cheerleading skirt dramatically. "I thought I'd look cute for you. You know, for all the special things we're doing today." Her voice was teasing, but her eyes sparkled with something more intimate, a playful warmth that made Mari's heart skip.

Mari chuckled and rolled her eyes, her fingers brushing Parker's arm. "I can't even look at you right now without—" She was cut off by Parker leaning down and kissing her, soft but full of warmth, as if the kiss was something they'd been saving for just this moment.

The laughter from earlier died down, replaced by a soft silence that hung between them. Mari could feel the weight of everything that wasn't being said, the closeness of their shared space, the stillness of the moment. It felt like time had paused just for them.

Parker pulled back slightly, her forehead resting against Mari's as they both lay there, breathing a little heavier now, the quiet tension in the air thickening.

Mari could sense something was on Parker's mind, the way she kept glancing away, the way her fingers fidgeted with the hem of her uniform. Finally, Parker spoke up, her voice quieter now, laced with a hint of nervousness.

"I—um, I told Van about us."

Mari froze, her eyes widening. "What?" she asked, surprised, and for a second, a rush of worry flooded her chest. "You told Van? How did she—"

Parker let out a soft breath, running a hand through her hair. "Yeah, I told her. I know we hadn't really talked about telling anyone yet, but after what happened earlier in the hallway, I couldn't keep it to myself anymore."

Mari sat up slightly, propping herself up on her elbows to look at Parker. "What happened in the hallway? You're not making any sense right now, Parker."

Parker's face grew a little somber as she shifted in the bed, her eyes flicking away to the corner of the room. "I had an episode during practice. I forgot to take my meds this morning and I felt it coming on so I ran out of the gym. It was humiliating and terrifying."

Mari's heart clenched at the vulnerability in Parker's voice. She reached out, taking Parker's hand in hers. "Parker," she murmured, her thumb gently brushing over the back of her hand.

Parker met her eyes, a mixture of relief and embarrassment on her face. "But then Van found me. She saw what was happening, and she helped me through it."

Mari's brow furrowed. "Van helped you?"

"Yeah," Parker nodded, a small, grateful smile appearing on her face. "She was there when I was freaking out and to make me feel more comfortable talking to her about it, she told me about her and Taissa. About how they're together."

Mari blinked, surprised. "Van and Taissa? Holy shit," Her voice trailed off as she processed the new information.

Parker gave a slight shrug, her voice soft but steady. "I think Van just wanted to show me that it was okay. That I wasn't the only one with something to hide. So I told her about us."

Mari was quiet for a moment, the weight of it all settling in. She hadn't expected this, hadn't thought about how much Parker might've been carrying in secret. She squeezed her hand tightly, her chest full of emotion.

"I'm glad you told her," Mari said, her voice a little choked up. "It feels good knowing we're not the only ones hiding something."

Parker leaned in to kiss Mari again, this time slower, more deliberate. "It does." She pulled back slightly, her eyes full of affection. "I love you, Mari."

Mari smiled, brushing a stray lock of hair from Parker's face. "I love you too, Parker."

They lay back down, their fingers intertwined as they melted into the comfort of each other's presence. Outside, the sun was starting to set, casting a soft orange glow through the curtains. The soft hum of the room filled the space as Mari and Parker lay side by side on the bed, their hands intertwined. They had spent the last few minutes in comfortable silence, the sound of their steady breathing and the occasional rustle of blankets was the only noise in the room.

Mari turned her head slightly, glancing over at Parker, who had her eyes closed, a content smile tugging at the corner of her lips. Her cheerleading uniform was slightly wrinkled, and her makeup was smeared, but she still looked beautiful to Mari. Everything about this moment felt easy, like they didn't have to say a word to communicate. But after a few minutes, Mari could feel the weight of the quiet finally urging her to break it.

Parker, however, was the first one to break the silence.

"You know," she said lazily, her voice light with humor, "I think you might want to take a shower. You've been playing soccer all day, and, uh, there's a distinct smell coming from you right now."

Mari blinked, half laughing, half surprised. "Excuse me? A smell?"

Parker grinned, her eyes sparkling with mischief as she pushed herself up on one elbow, her face now hovering over Mari's. "You're basically radiating that post soccer exhaustion. The sweat kind."

Mari shot her an exaggerated look of mock offense. "Are you calling me gross, Parker Matthews?"

Parker raised an eyebrow, her smile widening. "Maybe, Mariana Reyes."

Mari rolled her eyes at her full name but couldn't stop the smile spreading across her face. "Well, if I need a shower so badly, why don't you join me?" she asked, her voice low and teasing. "I bet you need a shower too after all that cheering."

Parker blinked at her, surprised by the suggestion, and then a slow, wicked grin spread across her face. "How could I say no to a sexy soccer player like you?"

Mari's laugh bubbled out, and she leaned up to kiss Parker's cheek quickly. Her heart skipped at the way Parker looked at her. She was always so effortless about making her feel wanted, desired. It was both thrilling and comforting all at once.

Parker chuckled and nudged Mari playfully. "What can I say? A cute, sweaty athlete who can probably kick my ass in soccer? Yeah, I'm not turning that down." She stood up, smoothing out her cheerleading skirt with one hand, her other still holding Mari's. "But if I'm joining you in the shower, you're gonna have to keep up, okay?"

Mari raised an eyebrow, a challenge sparking in her eyes. "Oh, I can definitely keep up."

Parker threw her a look that was a mix of playful and suggestive. "Oh, I'm sure you can." Parker tugged Mari's hand, pulling her gently toward the door.

"Come on, then. You can't keep a cheerleader waiting."

"Aye aye captain." Mari laughed, shaking her head. "I'm holding you to that promise, you know."

Parker flashed her a grin over her shoulder. "I wouldn't dream of backing out."

Afterwards, Parker and Mari sat curled up on the couch, their damp hair still drying from their post practice shower. Mari's arm was draped around Parker's shoulders, and Parker had tucked herself close, her head resting on Mari's chest. On the screen, James and the Giant Peach was playing.

"You know," Mari said, her voice low, "I forgot how weird this movie is. Like, the bugs? Creepy, but kind of cute."

Parker let out a soft laugh. "That's why I love it. It's weird but comforting. It reminds me of being a kid."

Mari smiled and kissed the top of Parker's head. "I like seeing you this relaxed."

Halfway through a quiet moment in the movie, Parker suddenly jolted up, her eyes wide and darting around the room. Her whole body tensed as she scanned the shadows, her breathing quickening.

Mari sat up immediately, concern flashing across her face. "Hey, what's wrong?"

Parker's gaze kept darting around the room as she clutched the edge of the couch. "I—I heard something, like someone was whispering."

Mari glanced around the room, her voice calm but firm. "Parker, there's no one here. I didn't hear anything."

Parker's eyes flicked to Mari, her panic easing slightly, but not fully gone. "Are you sure? It sounded real. Like laughing or—I don't know."

Mari reached out, gently taking Parker's hands in her own. "I'm sure, I promise. It's just us."

Parker exhaled shakily and leaned back into the couch, though her posture was still a little stiff. "I forgot to take my meds this morning," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. "I've been on edge all day. It's like my brain's just waiting for something to go wrong."

Mari's expression softened, and she pulled Parker toward her, wrapping her arms around her tightly. "Hey, it's okay. I'm right here." She rested her chin on Parker's head, her voice steady and soothing. "I'll always be here, and if you ever think you're hearing something, I'll tell you what's real and what's not, okay? You don't have to figure it out on your own. I'll never leave you."

Parker relaxed a little more, leaning into Mari's embrace. "Thank you," she murmured, her voice trembling slightly.

Mari kissed her forehead. "Now, let's finish this weird little peach movie."

Parker let out a soft laugh, her body finally settling against Mari's as the movie carried on, its strange world helping her find a bit of peace again.

—————————————————————————
alex's corner!
I promise we're getting to the plane crash soon