CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

THERE IS A SENSE of emptiness that engulfs a person when everything has been destroyed. Loneliness that resides within the corners of one's soul, of one's mind waiting to consume the person whole once the time is right.  It is a part of every human, some peoples' biggest fear  —  one that forces them to seek refuge in others, in hobbies, something to distract their mind from the truth.

Emptiness, loneliness, these feelings tend to become companions that last longer than relationships of any sort. Comforting people in the depths of the night, caressing their broken hearts  — letting it bleed once more like the wounds that were never healed.

Though, like any companion, over time it latches onto a person longer than it should, without knowing how to say goodbye. Soon it becomes a part of that person, an extension as if it is another limb. And like that, it fools humans to think it's something necessary to hold onto when in reality it is the one thing holding that person back.

As if it is a blindfold, it wraps itself around a person's face, covering one's eyes making them blind to any attempts loved ones take to dig them out of the hole they've dug.

"Trevor, you know you can tell me anything right?"

"Yes, Mom."

"Why have you been taking sleeping pills from the medicine cabinet?"

As if its tongue speaks only of magical spells that keep one committed to it, too afraid to let anyone in and steal the emptiness they have promised to love and cherish until death do them part.

"Kate hasn't spoken to us in weeks... do you think something happened at her friend's sleepover?"

"Leave her alone, if she wants to be an adult and make her own decisions, she should face the consequences."

"She's our daughter!"

As if it only knows how to remain in one's heart forever, knowing nothing else besides residing in the darkness where it waits for a person to find it once more. A bad habit, everyone falls prey to, one that keeps them wrapped around its ring finger.

"I'm sorry, Raj. We have excellent grief counselors that will help you get through this tough time. My wife is a therapist, maybe she'll be able to help you process your feelings."

"He's here, he's just late for class  — he's on a trip. Why do you keep telling me I need a therapist?!"

"It's been two months, Raj..."

Until death does them part.

    When time continues to move without them, when the feet continue to hit the ground, the whooshing of bodies speeding to catch up to today, there is one thing that remains, waiting for a person stuck in time. Emptiness. It waits for that person to look back instead of forward, to seek solace in nothing but the emptiness that grows within them from the core. It waits, the way the person does for time to allow it to move on. Waiting, waiting, waiting, until one or the other succumbs to the bounds of the clock.

    Knees hitting the ground make the loudest of noises, the sound of losing oneself, the most deafening song. The moment one accepts that they have lost the most important person in their lives, it extends its hand guiding one through a sea of darkness, digits made to entwine with them, welcoming them. It encircles them with an embrace so warm, they do not realize that over time it has become stone-cold, swimming in their veins, until all that is left is ice, too afraid of the warmth. No other hand fits into theirs like the hands of Emptiness, the others, too warm, daring to melt the person away.

And like that, one vows to only latch onto one thing  — emptiness.

And their final dance  — death.

+ + +

Tyler's eyes shifted from the window that overlooked the field below to the board littered with symbols he did not comprehend. A sigh resonated within him, but he didn't have the energy to emit it, instead, he lowered his head, the desk coming into his vision. His eyes searched for yet another thing to escape into, exhausted with only being able to feel the loneliness that roamed free in his body as if it had been hijacked.

When that failed, he lifted the pencil on the desk and attempted to solve the question that had ingrained itself into his mind. His teeth latched onto his bottom lip ever so slightly as he scribbled doodles on the paper as the teacher walked around to double-check that everyone had at least attempted the problem.

With finals around the corner, and teacher evaluations due, he knew that the last three weeks of schools were the most important. Though, he knew that a mere month would not be enough to save the failing grades that had tied yet another rope around him, holding him back from escaping this year that had given him a taste of hell.

"Mr. Meyers," her voice graced his ears, though he did not lift his head to acknowledge that he heard her. "Mr. Meyers, may I take a look at your answer?" Her dainty fingers brushed his bare arm causing him to flinch back from her warm touch. He watched her hands skim through his answer, a small breath escaping past her lips and dancing in the distance between them. "Your performance in this class has been on a gradual decline, Tyler." Her voice was hushed, the tone of concern in each syllable heightened the pitch of her voice. Although, even that was not enough for Tyler to rip his gaze away from the paper that had a single red 'X' on it. "You didn't even attempt the other problems, I allowed thirty minutes,  and all you finished was the last question  — half of the last question." She corrected herself.

" —  Can I go to the bathroom?" Tyler interjected, finally looking up at the woman who'd left no stone unturned while trying to get the old Tyler Meyers back. He watched as her eyebrows furrowed, a wrinkle of worry digging deep into her forehead. "You don't need to worry," he found himself reassuring her, but he didn't even know what he didn't want her to worry about.

Perhaps life did continue without a person.

Perhaps one's life was not as significant as he'd thought.

Tyler slid out of his seat, shuffling out of the room as numerous eyes watched his every movement. The moment the door shut behind him, he breathed a sigh of relief,  free of the confines the room had placed him in. His head turned to the left then right, wondering if the bathroom was truly his destination, or perhaps skipping school altogether. Tyler shut his eyes as he tried to make a decision so menial.

"I should..." he found himself talking to himself, biting down on his tongue so no one would look at him with the same judgemental gaze they'd adorned every time he stepped in their field of view.

Ever since he'd gotten into that fight with Dominic, it seemed that the remnants of the social circle he once belonged to had alienated him beyond what they had already been doing over the months after that party. Now they all lived happily in Dominic's palm, acting like his best friend, refusing to listen to what the people who suffered at the hands of his sinister actions had to say. Like him.

Tears stung Tyler's eyes as the guilt bubbled deep within his gut, daring to explode and poison the organs that were trying so hard to keep Tyler alive, despite his mind wanting otherwise. He wandered to the one memory he'd stored away forever, but he'd learned how short forever was when his first love was snatched away from him.

Tyler let out a shaky breath as images of that night flashed before his shut eyelids as if to snatch him and drown him in his sins. His hands cupped the sides of his head attempting to drown out the sound of the song that played in the background as he watched her run to Venus with Dominic trailing behind her the way a predator watches its prey.

"Tyler, just do me this one favor."

Does it hurt?

"No, she's my ex-girlfriend, it'll be weird."

On a scale of 1-10, how much does it hurt?

"Come on, we're bros, just get her to come to the party  — get Venus to invite her if you're scared."

One being practically non-existent.

"I'm not scared of any bitch."

Ten being excruciatingly painful.

"Then invite her."

How much does it hurt?

"Fine, she'll be here. I'll make sure of it." He snatched the red invitation card from Dominic's grasp, tracing Kate's name that was etched on the card.

Or does it not hurt at all?

Is it the guilt or the pain of knowing that there is blood belonging to another on their hands. Or is it the guilt of coming face to face with the person they are that brings them to their knees or the sins they have committed against a friend?

Is it guilt, or is it pain, that is enough to drown a person silently while others watch.

Or is it both?

"— Leave." Tyler gasped the word, clutching onto the t-shirt that had dampened due to the sweat.

Just as his feet had received the command to turn left he was met with the face of a ghost, staring at him with her locker open. Her mouth slightly agape, probably because of what he had become in the span of the months the two had spent without thinking about each other's faces.

Tyler's vision blurred as he stepped back, terrified of the cumulation of the wrongdoings that stood in front of him.

However, he could not stop himself from pointing out how he saw himself in her  — the sunken cheeks, the dry lips that were littered with scabs one could see from afar, and the absolute lifelessness that swam freely in her irises. As if she'd enchanted him, he took another step forward in her direction and all that was exchanged between them as he took hesitant steps ahead were their shaky breaths that seemed to perfectly capture the states of their minds.

Two people, stuck in the past as the world moved along without them. Two people, ruined by the man who didn't know when to stop.

Two dead souls  — all that was left of the pair who had welcomed the emptiness with outstretched hands.

"Kate," he whispered her name loud enough for only him to hear, despite standing right across from her. Her name tasted like a forgotten memory of his favorite candy growing up  — a sweet taste he'd outgrown momentarily but now craved endlessly because it represented a moment that was not frozen. Tyler bit his lip wondering if he was even allowed the right to even say her name after all she had suffered because of him. "I'm..." Tyler whispered, reaching to grasp her hand, but when she flinched back a sob swallowed the word he was to say next.

"Leave." Her voice was shrill, nothing like the woman he'd left her as.

Nothing like the Kate that had been his friend, the one he'd damned the night he got Venus to invite her to the party. She was no longer the Kate he'd tormented with snide comments all while pining for her best friend.

"Kate," was all he could muster, too afraid that if he said anything past that she would hate him more than she does at that moment.

"Tyler, please leave me alone." There was a sense of patience in her tone that had always been reserved for him whenever he would annoy her with his childish antics.

How much more did he remember of her, how much had he truly forgotten?

"I'm sorry." He blocked her from shutting the locker, and the single statement was enough for her arm to drop back to its side, refusing to meet his gaze. A tear glided down her cheek as she shot her head to the side, but the way her shoulders shook slightly was enough for Tyler to know that she was never going to be okay. An apology would never be enough. "It'll get better, and the mornings will become good again. Please just don't give up."

"You've lost the right to say that to me." Kate's gaze met him, her hands latched onto his arms forcing him to look into the eyes of the woman he'd destroyed. "You watched them tear me apart until I fell down. Now that you're scared to fall apart you come to me for forgiveness?" Her stare was brazen as she dug her nails deeper into his skin until he gasped in pain, though that did not give her enough satisfaction to substitute the loneliness that had driven her mad. "I'll accept your apology when you die because only then will you know what it feels like to have no one, absolutely no one."

And with that, she was gone, and he was left with the imprint of her anger on his arms, the words she'd spat at him as if it were a weapon dancing in his ears like a haunting song inviting him to disappear forever. The sound of her sneakers scuffing the hallway floor soon drowned out with the sound of the bell ringing three times, and when it rang the last time he'd finally broken apart from the trance he had placed himself in.

Tyler pulled at his hair as he attempted to shield his face away from passersby, afraid to show yet another person his downfall. I'm tired, his brain had a fleeting thought that seemed to ring in his mind each time memories he'd bottled up became undone for the umpteenth time. As if their only purpose was to shackle him down, the sins the only thing he could breathe in, the icy water paralyzing him from moving forward.

Without his mind having to put more energy into thinking about what to do next, his feet walked towards the exit, ignorant to his exam that was going on right now. Briefly, he thought of what Lily would be thinking, staring back at his empty seat at the edge of the classroom. He didn't have the energy to fill that seat anymore or any role he'd taken up as a human on this planet.

He pushed open the door and was greeted by the humid spring air enveloping him in a hug too warm for his liking. Tyler looked ahead at the sea of trees ahead of him, wishing to be a tree in his next life.

He was too tired of this life.

Maybe it was just a foolish misunderstanding that he would be on anyone's mind after all he had done. If Venus Wilson was the one that poured the gasoline, he was the one that lit the match.

"I'm sorry," he cried out to the town that had caged him in. "Let me breathe." He whimpered, clawing at his neck. "I can't breathe."

"I can't help but hate you!"

"I'll accept your apology when you die..."

"Tyler, she's lying!"

"I'm sorry," Tyler heaved as he covered his ears, afraid that someone would hear his thoughts and throw him in a hospital. "I'll be good. I'll make this better."

" — Tyler?" A deep voice ripped him away from his misery. Tyler slowly turned around, looking up at the figure that stood at the top of the steps that led into the school. His stomach dropped when his face became clear once he'd squinted, shielding his eyes from the sun. "Tyler?"

"It was all my fault, I should have believed you," Tyler muttered, tripping back as he faced yet another ghost. "I'm sorry." He croaked out, although he knew that a sorry was not enough to erase the marks he'd left on their bodies and souls. He turned on his heel and bolted for his car, wiping his tears away.

"Tyler!"

Even his name had started to sound like an insult, synonymous with the devil.

"I'm sorry," Tyler whispered for the last time before disappearing into his car and away from the school that had imprisoned him. "I don't think I can be good."

+ + +

Lily gazed back at the vacant seat that was to be occupied by Tyler before letting out a sigh, turning back to hand in her exam that was littered with scribbles around the border. She sent the teacher a meek smile before dashing out of the door, already imagining the lecture she was going to give Tyler for jeopardizing his grades  — Stop, her mind halted her steps, you're not his girlfriend, and with that realization, Lily's shoulders sank, the strap of her backpack far too heavy for her to carry. She looked down at her feet as if frozen in time.

She knew she wasn't his girlfriend, she was the one that broke up with him. Lily knew she liked Trevor, the one thing she was certain of at that moment in her life, but why was it when Tyler did things like this she had the need to protect him from himself. Why did she feel as though he was on his way to write a fate he was not destined for the way her mother did  — No, her mind froze the last thing that was running free  — her thoughts.

Lily shoved her hand into her pocket, digging out her phone only for her screen to light up indicating she'd received a message. When her eyes focused on the name, her blood ran cold. She straightened her back as she subconsciously shifted her gaze side to side, analyzing the hallway containing only a few students.

Some stared at her, accusing fingers pointed at her, as whispers she couldn't decipher floated in the air, creating an atmosphere that made her stomach twist. Her mouth opened to tell off the girls that looked like they could be middle schoolers but stopped herself instead, dropping her head to look at her phone once more.

Her breath grew as shaky as her grip on the phone. Days of being terrorized by his texts had felt like years to her, subtle threats that she didn't expect to leave lasting marks on her psyche. The marks that made her feel afraid in a hall full of people that would act as witnesses if something were to go awry.

"Nothing will happen," Lily reassured herself, though when unlocked the phone she was met with a picture of her back.

He was watching her.

"What did you do Lily?"

"Boo," his breath tickled Lily's neck, causing her to turn around only to come face to face with the man that had become a regular visitor in her nightmares. "Did I scare you?" Dominic raised an eyebrow at her before a cocky grin found its way to his visage.

Lily's eyes widened, stumbling back a few steps. Once she realized that he was enjoying her acting helpless, she found herself trying her hardest to remain as rigid in her stance as possible. Her feet planted on the ground as people continued to gather around the two, the whispers growing to a low murmur that seemed to beat along with her heart  — erratic and frighteningly fast.

"What do you want?" Lily's voice came out shaky and she cursed herself for even opening her mouth. However, the way 'poor girl'  floated around them and the way Dominic's once smug grin faltered she didn't curse herself for too long. "Haven't you done enough, are you going to do this in front of people too?" There was a sense of emptiness, hanging on each syllable that escaped her lips. An emptiness she'd adopted in return for her friends' sanity.

Loneliness was something she could get used to, but for them to get used to the life they'd lived up until now with no hope left  — that was simply the worst punishment she could think of.

"He made me invite her to the party... I was so drunk, she was so drunk. We shouldn't have been there, she shouldn't have been there, and then she was crying  — no one knew what to do ... we just believed him. I mean who would believe her?"

"Lily, why do you keep lying to everyone about what happened between us  — if anything happened between us," Dominic snipped. He ran his fingers through his hair, pulling ever so slightly on his dirty-blond roots before they fell limp to his side.

Lily watched every movement of his like a hawk does with their prey. She was afraid that she would become his prey with the way she had been letting his empty threats affect her. Those sleepless nights with his words echoing in her mind had driven her to the point where she'd contemplated whether this was even a good idea, but she knew that stepping back was no longer an option.

Once a rumor was out there, it was there for good. Lie or not, she'd joined the cycle, and like all the passengers she'd learned that the cycle is neverending far too late.

"— Lily?" A voice in the crowd drowned out her thoughts forcing her to face reality. Dominic in front of her, tempting her to break her facade, to admit everything was a sham  — whatever everything was. He wanted her to break so he could be the hero again, the same way Tyler feigned innocence to become the hero.

There were so many cycles in life and humans found themselves choosing the ones that only lead to loneliness and despair.

Her throat ran dry as her mind instructed her to let go of her thoughts, to hit him with the lowest blow. "The same way nothing happened between you and Kate that night?" And with that statement the last traces of cockiness evident in his expression disappeared, his gaze that once roamed around the hall enjoying the scene he'd created zeroed in on Lily, eyes burning with a sense of rage that only made Lily hold back a smile.

She'd gotten under his skin and his reaction was enough of a confirmation that he knew what he was doing that night.

"What are you talking about?" He hissed, latching onto her forearm as if afraid the spectators would hear. "You didn't even go here  — who told you?" His fingers dug into her skin. "Is that what this is about?" Realization washed over him like a tsunami had hit, the color in his face seeped away and all that was left was his ghost faced with the accumulation of his sins. "Whatever that bitch told you was a lie, I would never do something like that to anyone, not even a slut like her!" Lily ripped her arm from his hold. Rage, anger, fury ran free in her body as she tried to keep her emotions at bay.

"He made me invite her to the party... I was so drunk, she was so drunk. We shouldn't have been there, she shouldn't have been there, and then she was crying  — no one knew what to do ... we just believed him. I mean who would believe her?"

A sea of gasps filled the air, lingering in the small circle as Dominic clutched his cheek. Lily retracted her hand and shut her mouth that had fallen agape the moment she'd realized what her body had done. She found herself leaning back, almost as if she were cowering in fear of his next move, however, time came to a standstill at that moment.

He remained frozen, caressing his cheek as if he were trying to make sense of the abrupt connection of her hand against his cheek. Lily watched with wide eyes along with the others. A wave of silence had blanketed the hallway as everyone watched Dominic's face contort to several unrecognizable expressions. But when he let out a low laugh, licking his bottom lip, Lily knew that what she'd done was going to cost her.

She watched as Dominic reached into his pocket, his eyes fixed on her as he did so, almost trying to relay what was to come in the following days, but the fear in her body had struck her paralyzed. All she could do was watch how he pulled out something from his pocket, a blur of motion before a single color blinded her eyesight.

A bright red card was trapped between his index and middle finger. He cocked an eyebrow at her, tilting the card towards her, although Lily remained still. She watched as he reached out to grab her hand, the way his touch felt like fire on her skin. All she could do was watch as she tried her hardest to not unload the contents of her stomach. The red card fell gracefully on her hand, before slipping onto the ground from her grip. Dominic's eyes fell to the ground as did everyone's but Lily's remained in the same spot.

"Give this to your boyfriend," Dominic said.

"He's not my boyfriend," Lily finally spoke up as the faceless men and women around her started whispering in the language of damnation, the sole purpose to spread yet another rumor. "What is this?" Lily pointed at the card.

"A party invitation, your friend is invited, make sure he comes." Dominic smiled at her causing the hairs on the back of her neck to stand. Lily felt as though she had cotton in her mouth as if she had unlearned the process of speaking at that moment. "Maybe you should come too," He bent down to pick the card up, looking up to her from his kneeled position. "Tyler, Kate, Trevor. Where do you fit in there, I'd like to know."

Lily opened her mouth to outright reject his offer, but the sudden mention of Trevor's name halted her in time. Her mind racked for any sort of explanation as to how he knew of her connection to Trevor but she came up emptyhanded. She could feel the stares of those around her, as if they were several tiny spotlights aimed at her, waiting for her to seal her fate.

"He made me invite her to the party... I was so drunk, she was so drunk. We shouldn't have been there, she shouldn't have been there, and then she was crying  — no one knew what to do ... we just believed him. I mean who would believe her?"

Her gaze dropped to Dominic who remained at his knees. His eyes contained no sense of remorse, instead, a hint of playfulness swam free in his pupils. Lily gulped, before snatching the card he'd held out for her and walking away.

The whispers grew distant with each step she took before there was only emptiness that covered her senses. Lily hunched over as her hands clenched at the fabric above her heart. The red card had been crumpled then uncrumpled as she sank to the ground, tears streaking her face.

"You're okay now," she reassured herself, before standing tall once more.

Lily reached into her pocket to retrieve her phone and clicked a button. The recording was saved, though it was of no use. He didn't confess again. Her fingers found themselves scrolling through the endless audio recordings both Tyler and she had taken of each conversation they'd had with him in hopes that he would confess. It was far too late into the game for Lily to recuperate, it was time to face the enemy head-on. Lily's thumbs tapped multiple letters before sending a text to Tyler.

'Party. Friday at 10 PM.'

"What did you do Lily?"

She looked ahead at the doors that would lead to the parking lot, a familiar face coming into view. All she wanted to do at that moment was to run into his arms, but she knew doing so would drag him into another mess he couldn't handle  — she couldn't handle. She couldn't run anymore. Dominic couldn't run anymore, it was time for him to taste the fruit of his deeds.

His past sins had finally caught up to him, and he was slowly being cornered into a wall he didn't know existed. A wall Venus had unknowingly set up for him the moment her own plan went off the rails, a mess created by Venus Wilson. A mess Lily Tran would clean up, once and for all, no matter the price.

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hello everyone! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, I'd like to apologize for the late update. as some of you may know, I was exposed to COVID-19 two weeks ago and had to get tested. I am in better health now, hence the update!

I aim to get back to weekly updates but maybe switching gears to double updates a week with the Watty's around the corner!!

the next chapter will be the last chapter of part two, it may be longer than this and I may split it into two parts (but boy is it going to to be intense), make sure to stay tuned for more updates by following me!!

be safe,
love roman