"Ben!"

Ben woke up with a start looking around he found he wasn't in his room anymore instead he was in Snoke's throne room.

"Ben!" He heard his name called again.

He turned to see Snoke sitting in his throne and Y/N floating above the ground writhing in pain.

"Ben, Ben," Snoke sneered. "She calls you Ben and you allow it. How many times do I have to tell you Ben Solo is dead, you killed him the minute you killed your father."

His gaze went to Y/N again causing her to scream out in pain again.

"Stop!" Ben screamed angrily.

Suddenly Y/N came crashing to the floor with a sickening crack.

Ben ran to her side but suddenly came to a halting stop before he could reach her.

"I said Ben Solo is dead!" Snoke screamed as Ben went flying backwards into the wall pinning him there.

"Ben!" Y/N cried, as the elevator door opened and what strode in shocked Ben. Walking into the was Kylo Ren.

"What," Ben gasped as he watched as the masked figure strode over to Y/N grabbed her by her hair yanking her upwards so she was kneeling before him.

"That's it Kylo, kill her." Snoke laughed as Kylo Ren reached up and took off his mask and there underneath was Ben Solo. With a smile on his face he turned to look at Ben cocking his head to the side as the two made eye contact. They were the same person except in the eyes, the eyes that were looking back at him were cold and dark, no light in them at all.

"Ben," Y/N cried looking between the Ben before her and the one pinned to the wall.

Without breaking eye contact, Kylo Ren pulled out his lightsaber and ran Y/N through.

"No!" Ben screamed as he bolted upright in bed. Looking around the room he found himself back in his bedroom.

"Ben," He heard a voice sleepy voice say and he turned to see Y/N looking back at him concerned.

"It was just a nightmare, I'm sorry I woke you." He sighed running his hands through his hair.

"Hey," Y/N said sitting up and wrapping her arms around his chest leaning her head on his back. "What was the nightmare about."

"I don't need to bother you with it." He sighed. "Let's go back to sleep." Ben then started to lay down but Y/N quickly grabbed him turning him so he was looking at her.

"Ben, you are trembling, please tell me what happened, let me ease your mind." She said as she leaned her forehead on his.

"I killed you in my dream, well not me but Kylo Ren killed you, and I had to watch. And he just stared at me when he did it. He was almost mocking me as he ran you through with his saber." Ben said as he placed his hand on her cheek.

"Ben, it's alright, you aren't going to hurt me." She said.

"That wasn't what scared me, it was the fact that Kylo Ren and Ben Solo are two seperate people and they are both still a part of me and at any moment Kylo might take over."

"I'm not going to let that happen," Y/N insisted.

"And what happens if I get angry, what happens if I hurt you again. I still haven't forgiven myself for hurting you the last time."

"Then train me," She said abruptly.

"What."

"Train me in the ways of the Force, the way we used to train with Luke, train me in the ways of the Jedi and the Sith..."

"No I..." Ben started when Y/N put her hand over his mouth.

"Only so I can keep up with you. Let me learn like you learned, that way if you ever try to hurt me, and I'm not saying your going to, I know you won't. But if it will put your mind at ease, train me so that way I can defend myself. And then one day we can take out Snoke and the whole fucking First Order together."

"I can train you in the ways of the Force but I can't teach you in the ways of the Sith, I won't..."

"Ben, the only way I'm going to be able to keep up with anyone we need to defeat is if I can beat then at their own game."

"What if you,what if I lose you to the dark, you don't know how strong it's hold is." Ben said seriously.

Y/N giggled slightly as she ran her fingers through his hair. "Ben you are not going to lose me to the dark side," She said as she kissed him.

Ben groaned. "I don't know Y/N"

"Well I've already made up my mind so..." She said kissing him again.

"Y/N" Ben sighed again.

"Nope," She said as she laid down. "Goodnight," She giggled.

"Oh now you want to go to sleep." Ben laughed as he got on top of her kissing her.

Y/N put her hand over his mouth again.

"Say you will train me."

Ben mumbled under her hand.

"Ben," She said seriously.

Ben moved his head so he could talk.

"Fine fine, but if things go to far, we are done. I make the final say." He insisted.

A smile spread across Y/N's face as she almost squealed. "Really."

"But we have to wait until your wrist is better."

"My wrist is fine, you healed it when I asleep. We have to start tomorrow, please I want to start tomorrow."

"Ok fine, fine but I do have other things to do, Hux isn't exactly going to allow me to hang out in my room all day."

Y/N grumbled. "I know."

"But the minute I come back to this room, I am all yours." Ben said smiling as he rolled off of Y/N. "And if we are going to train you need to sleep."

Y/N smiled as she snuggled herself into Ben's chest his strong arms wrapping around her as they fell asleep once more.

When Y/N woke up she found that she was alone in the bed. "Ben?" She called afraid he had left without saying goodbye.

Suddenly Ben strode out of bathroom wearing just his pants and his compression band around his waist.

"Are you ok?" He asked as he tried his hair with a towel.

"Yeah, I just..." She said looking him up and down. "Do you have to go to work?" She asked seductively.

Ben laughed as he walked over to her. "Don't do that or I won't leave and then we will have a whole fleet of stormtroopers at my door." He said as he leaned over and kissed her.

"Mmm" Y/N smiled into his kiss as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"No," Ben laughed again. "I'm serious if we continue this I won't leave."

"Fine," She said as she hopped out of bed.

"Hey," Ben said as she grabbed her by the shoulders. "If you are going to practice by yourself, only use the lightsaber, don't use the Force at all."

"What?" Y/N whined. "Why,"

"I'm surprised that Snoke hasn't felt your energy already, but if you use the Force, he will definitely know you are not only alive but on the ship."

"But I used the Force early and nothing happened."

"Y/N we aren't arguing about this, I'm not risking it. Saber only, when I get back I will teach you how to shield yourself from Snoke's view." He said as he threw on a shirt.

"Fine." Y/N huffed causing Ben to chuckle.

Ben suddenly went over to his pillow and pulled out his old lightsaber.

"How did you get it back." Y/N gasped.

"Phasma was on her way to turn it into Snoke, I just confiscated it from her." He smiled as he held it out to Y/N.

"And you decided to keep it under your pillow?" She laughed as she reached for it but Ben pulled it back.

"It was just a precaution."

"What did you think I was going to kill you in your sleep." Y/N laughed but Ben felt a tinge of hurt run through him as he remembered that night in the temple. The look in Luke Skywalker's face as the light from his lightsaber lite up his eyes. He looked terrified of him, because he knew that Ben Solo couldn't be saved from the darkness. Y/N gasped. "Ben I'm sorry I didn't."

Ben just smiled pushing the memory away. "Don't worry." He said as he handed her the saber.

"Ben, why did you keep this." She asked seriously looking up at him.

"I needed something that reminded me that Ben Solo was still a part of me and that he wasn't completely gone." Ben insisted. "Plus I needed to still feel connected with you somehow." He said as he thought of a memory for when Y/N and he trained.

"Alright, Ben Y/N pair up." Luke said as the two faced each other. "Alright, Y/N you need to the get the red cloth on the stone behind Ben, and Ben you need to get blue cloth behind Y/N. It is your goal to get the cloth before the other and you need to make sure that your opponent doesn't get your cloth."

Ben smiled as he looked at Y/N. The other Padawans had gathered around for that they hoped would be the best fight they had seen. Ben and Y/N were the strongest out of everyone. Murmuring began as people started to bet who would win. Many predicted that Ben would beat Y/N easily, others pitted Y/N to win.

"Get back to back!" Luke yelled over the talking. "You can use any means to stop your opponent, including your lightsaber."

Y/N turned around as Ben backed into her their backs touching.

"You're going down Solo." Y/N thought.

"Oh you are very mistaken flygirl, I'm a Skywalker, don't forget that." He laughed in his head.

"Ready," Luke said and the two nodded, tightening their grip on their lightsabers. "Go!"

The minute Luke said the word the two pulled their lightsaber out of their belt turning it on and turning their two blades clashing.They pushed into each other causing sparks to fly. Y/N quickly threw her hand out sending Ben flying backwards, then she starting to run towards the rock. Ben responded by throwing her head out knocking Y/N's feet from under her sending her falling forward. Y/N caught her self and jumped back up only to be met by Ben charging at her with his lightsaber on. She turned hers on just in time for the blades to clash once again. Suddenly Ben's face fell as he faltered looking at Y/N with a look of sadness and distress. But Y/N was too deep into the competition and she reached up and kicked Ben square in the chest causing him to fall to the ground. She started towards the cloth again when this time Ben grabbed her ankles causing her to fall just shy of the cloth.

"Go Y/N!" Some of the Padawans yelled.

"Get her Ben" Others yelled.

Y/N started to reach out when Ben got on top over her pinning her hands over her head.

Y/N wrapped her legs around his waist and flipped them over so she was on top then she reached out for the cloth but Ben stopped her by grabbing her wrists. The two then looked at each other breathing deeply.

"Ben," Y/N thought leaning closer to him.

"Alright that's enough!" Luke called.

The memory faded and Ben and Y/N were back on the Finalizer.

"Do you remember how mad he was at us after that." Ben laughed.

"Ben, why did you falter? What were you thinking about?" Y/N asked seriously.

Ben sighed. "Snoke was in my head, he kept telling me to kill you."

"Ben, I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize, you were the only thing that kept me somewhat sane." He said as he leaned down and kissed her again.

This lasted for a while before Y/N broke away pushing Ben backwards.

"Alright, go, the sooner you leave, the sooner you come back and we can train."

"Oh I see so that's the only reason you want me around is so I can teach you, I thought you wanted me around because you actually cared." Ben teased as he headed towards the door.

"Hey, if you train me I might have to figure out how to repay you." Y/N said seductively.

Ben gulped as he walked out of the room.

Y/N watched as the door shut. Then she quickly threw off her turtleneck and grabbed her tank top from the resistance.

Looking down at the saber in her hand, although she was on an enemy base and there were people all around her that would love and torture and kill her, she felt calm. Quickly she lit the saber and swung around landed in a side lunge squat the lightsaber straight out to the side.

She continued this for most of the day, just practicing her control and her speed with the saber. She had wanted to practice with the Force, but she knew Ben was write that if she used it Snoke would find her.

Ben on the other hand had to face countless meetings with General Hux about the Resistance fleet and how the First Order was close to catching up to them. Snoke then summoned him to talk about how he felt now that everyone that was connected to Ben Solo was dead. He had to bite his tongue when Snoke talked about Y/N.

"See now aren't you glad that that girl you once loved is dead, she wouldn't approve of the man you have become." Snoke laughed.

The day dragged on as he counted down the minutes until he could be with Y/N again.

"You seem very distracted today Ren," Hux said.

Ben didn't even say anything as he just glared at him.

"Well, Snoke said that you are no longer required to eat dinner with us as long as you are training, and working on your mental training. So I sent a trooper to your room with some food."

"You did what!" Ben almost screamed.

Hux just smiled. "Is there a problem?"

Ben's hands clenched into fists as he swallowed hard. "No it's fine." He said through gritted teeth. "I'll just go... go back to my room." Then he turned and walked down the hall fighting the urge to sprint.

As he went through hallway after hallway he kept expecting to see Y/N being dragged down the hall, but there was nothing. His worry got more and more intense and his pace got quickly. When he finally reached the final hallway he was almost sprinting.

"Y/N!" He called when he opened his door, to his horror he found it completely empty a plate of food sitting on the table. "Y/N!" he called again panicked.

"No, no, no, no, no." Ben thought running his hands through hair tears in his eyes.

"Ben?" He heard a voice say from behind him and he quickly wiped around to see Y/N coming out of the bathroom.

Ben sighed as he ran to her and pulled her in for a hug.

"God fucking Hux!" He exclaimed.

"The stormtrooper opened the door and I ran into the bathroom." Y/N said but Ben just pulled her into him tighter. "Ben, it's ok, he didn't see me."

Ben couldn't even speak as he held her.

"Ben, I can't breathe."

Ben quickly let her go, looking her up and down. He still couldn't believe that she was there, sometimes he worried that she would just disappear.

There was a moment of silence before Ben finally spoke.

"I'm sorry, the way Hux made it sound was like he knew you were here. I thought he had sent the stormtrooper to get you." Ben said.

Y/N smiled as she ran her fingers though his hair. "You have gotten very protective in your old age Solo."

Ben grabbed her hand holding it in front of his mouth. "If I lose you again, I won't survive it." He said then he kissed her hand.

"You won't lose me." She said as she pulled him in for another long kiss.

Ben then broke away, as he pulled out to colored fabrics, one red and one black.

A smile spread across Y/N's face as she grabbed the red one. "You're going down Solo."

"We'll see flygirl." He said as he leaned in for another kiss.

Y/N back up

Y/N backed up as she looked at Ben. "Your distraction tactics will not work on me."

"Fine." Ben smiled.

"Fine." Y/N replied as she turned around placing her back against Ben's.

"On the count of three," Ben started as he stuffed his cloth into his sleeve, while Y/N threw hers onto the table next to the food. "One, Two..."

"Three!" Y/N called as she turned around lightsaber lit as Ben met her lightsaber with his.

She glanced behind him as their lightsabers sparked.

"Where is it!" She exclaimed as she kicked him. "You cheated."

"I didn't cheat if I didn't set any rules." Ben laughed as threw Y/N backwards as he made his way towards her cloth.

"That's not fair you can't use the Force if I can't." She said as she grabbed his ankles causing him to fall over.

As he hit the floor he just began to laugh hysterically.

"It's not funny," Y/N said as she got on top of him. "Where is it, where did you hide it," She said as she began to look through his cloths.

Suddenly Ben stopped laughing as he grabbed her wrists.

The two stared at each other for a moment before Ben leaned up and passionately kissed Y/N.

They continued to kiss as Ben picked her up as they walked over to the bed Ben set her on the bed as he crawled over top of her pulling his shirt over his head as he did so.

Y/N grabbed onto his compression band pulling him into her.

"Is," Y/N started between the kisses. "Is your side feeling better?"

Ben laughed as he leaned his forehead on her forehead. "You really want to talk about this right now."

Y/N laughed "I just don't want to hurt you."

"You won't hurt me." Ben smiled as he kissed her again.

They kissed for a while before Y/N put her hand over his mouth.

"Seriously, where did you put the cloth." Y/N said causing Ben to laugh again as he hoped off the bed. He reached down to grab the cloth out of his sleeve.

"You cheater! I would have never found that!" Y/N laughed as Ben came back and crawled over her.

"That was the point." He smiled as he held the cloth in front of her face.

She quickly grabbed it.

"Well I think we need a redo, it's only fair." Y/N said as she looked at Ben.

"Seriously." Ben laughed.

"Tomorrow." She smiled seductively as she wrapped the cloth around Ben's neck pulling him in for another long kiss as his hands inched the way up her shirt until he pulled it off.

"Flygirl you don't know what you are getting yourself into." Ben said as he kissed her neck.

"I think I do, Solo." She smiled as she kissing him again digging her nails into his bare back.