"Leadership is hard to define and good leadership even harder. But if you can get people to follow you to the ends of the earth, you are a great leader."

-Indra Nooyi

You don't have to yell. You don't have to yell...

I sit in the harsh light of my laptop screen, my eyes clamped shut as I chant my mantra in my head. The fact that my mantra during raid night is 'you don't have to yell' should be disturbing but it's honestly not. It's normal at this point. What is disturbing is the fact that we're on week two of our newb switch up and we're getting nowhere fast.

What the hell was I thinking?

"Bad, you gotta get in there! Don't make Arkies do all the work." I quip into my headset watching as my off-tank misses his taunt again, causing the health bar for Arkies to dip into the red and forcing me to use my Lay on Hands, a move I specifically save for instances where we need a full health recovery. This shouldn't be one of those times.

"Better late than never." A deep cocky voice points outs as my main tanks voice drifts through the headphones, responding to his tanking partners screw up.

I find myself repeating his words to my monitor, twisting them into a sassy high-pitched whine. Okay, maybe Arkies is the same level of obnoxious he was when we met.

"Cut the crap both of you and focus. This should be a tank and spank boss."

Trying to refocus our main defense's attention isn't an easy task, it never has been. Between the casual aloofness he's developed over the years and his ability to push my buttons on a moment's notice, it often ends in an argument. It also doesn't help that I know everyone's concentration is slipping by the second leaving us teetering on the edge of an unwarranted silliness spiral.

"Yes, ma'am!" Arkies declares a little too enthusiastically, his mic going silent.

Laughter floods the discord channel causing me to jump in my seat. Shit. My mouse jerks and I watch as I heal myself rather than Arkies. "Y'all bicker like an old married couple." The Biebs chokes out through his laughter.

Fucking Biebs... I'm not sure why he's still here, it's not like his damage is anything special and he's always standing in something he shouldn't be. More often than not he's to blame for our failed boss kills and non-productive time spent socializing.

I watch as it takes seconds for my main tank's health dips into the red and then disappears altogether. It takes a few more for the off-tank and myself to follow, our health completely drained and our avatars collapsing in their personalized dramatic ways. Those dull-witted, empty-headed morons...

A low whistle sounds in my ear. "Nice knowing you Biebs." One of our ladies Kat mumbles.

"In his defense, Ell did heal herself rather than Kies." My elemental shammy Mcqueen interjects.

I sigh in aggravation as I pinch the bridge of my nose and remind myself to breathe through the anger before I speak. I am the one at fault for a miss-heal, I won't deny that, and Biebs is the cause, but he's not the one I'm now holding accountable. Arkies started the bickering in the first place, leaving him the one I now blame for a failed attempt to take this boss down and the raid member who will take the brunt of my fury.

"I'm not going to kick Biebs," I grumble clenching my jaw. "But Arkies is a completely different story."

"Woah now, you can't just kick our king out. Put him in the dog house for a night at least!" Beibs declares in his classic overdramatic and childish tone.

A sinister grin crawls onto my face and for a brief moment, I wish they could see it so they'd know how pissed off I am. If they want to play 'pick on Ella' then fine, we can play that game and I'm not in the mood to play nice. "Guess who will be joining him if they can't keep their mouth shut." I hope the point has been made. Don't fuck with Ella. Period.

The channel is quiet, giving me time to catch my breath and try to cool my head. Not going to happen though, I need more than just a meager few seconds to come down from the ledge I'm on. We need a break.

"Take five," I grumble dropping down into my personal channel. All I want is a quiet place to decompress for the few minutes I have so I don't end up kick another guild member as I have in the past. The familiar bing sounds off in my ear, letting me know that the only person with enough gonads to follow me has dropped down into the channel with me.

"Yes?" I question, rubbing my eyes, not trying to hide the fact that fatigue and irritation plague my mood. I know that once my crew hits the silly goof off stage of raid night, without a doubt, it is over.

"You know you killed me right?"

I roll my eyes at my screen, a heavy sigh exiting my lips as I try to compose myself internally. Yelling at Arkies never gets me anything but excess anger, something which I don't need at the moment. I morph my frustration into sarcasm instead and funnel it into my words. "Your point?"

"No point," he responds with ease, "Though an apology could be quite satisfying." He muses out loud, the familiar air of humor lingering his voice.

"Apology huh?"

Over my dead body. Never once have I apologized to Arkies for anything and I'd be damned if I ever do. I snort to myself, wondering what could possibly give him the notion that it's even a possibility but stop myself short. He was antagonizing me once again, in that casual and playful way he always does. Asshole...

"And how would you handle these morons, oh great king..." I ask, putting extra emphasis on the word king as my annoyance begins to slip through and into my words.

"Don't appreciate the sarcasm El," he states a sliver of playful reproach in his voice before continuing on, "but you should try not being so..." He stops mid-sentence as he probably searches for a diplomatic way to say what he's thinking but it's easy to see where he is going and it strikes a sour chord with me.

"Controlling, overbearing, bitchy?" I question, anger hot in my face once again. I hate that despite having six years of cordial correspondence online he continues to push my buttons until I snap.

Arkies sighs heavily. "El, that's not what I said."

"Break is over." I quip, not wanting to talk any longer. This is always how it goes down between Arkies and I. He thinks he can scrutinize me by pointing out my leading flaws and then pretends it's all okay when it clearly isn't. There is a reason he's on the other side of my line and this is it.

"Are you still going to heal me at least?" He questions now backtracking.

Classic. I growl under my breath. Who does he think I am? "I'm not that petty. I'm done leading this shit show for tonight though. Good luck."

I don't give him time to respond before jumping back into raid chat to address the group. "Arkies will be leading the raid tonight since he thinks he can do better," I state, the irritation still in my veins from our brief tiff. If he wants to scrutinize me then he obviously thinks he can do it better.

"Not what I said." Arkies corrects, joining the rest of us.

"But probably implied." Kat points out.

An awkward silence drifts through the discord channel before Arkies begins to speak again in his classic overly confident tone. "Guess it's time to show El how it's really done."

His voice holds so much promise I swear I can see him smirking at his computer screen despite having no idea what he looks like. I shake the imaginary image from my mind, rolling my exhausted eyes at his cocky declaration. Before I can stop myself I hold my mic button down to give him another taste of my sass.

"I seriously doubt that."