THE NEXT DAY after the team family day felt like a blessing. Not because we're one day closer to the game but because my parents are finally out of my sight. Back in their hotel suite doing whatever — I don't care and I don't want to see them again until after the game. They bring me so much stress and anxiety and they don't even know it. The breath of relief I feel whenever they exit a room is so inexplicable and relaxing that I don't know if I should feel ashamed or happy.

However, today I am extremely happy because it's the day I have dinner with Jaylen and his grandmother. He texted me this morning about the location and said he'd meet me there so I've spent all afternoon getting ready putting on a navy blue polo sweater and cargo. I've never met anyone's family before because most of the time everyone I've dated family already knows my family because all rich people too for some weird reason — but wait Jaylen and I aren't dating? Are we? Is this considered a date? No, I'm just meeting up with him and his grandmother and having Korean BBQ.

I try not to think about it too much as I make my way to the address of the restaurant Jaylen had given me earlier and when I get there I see the boy standing outside waiting for me. A baggy hoodie and even baggier pants as his eyes wander around until they see me a few feet away. His eyes lit up and he met me halfway.

"She's already in there seated and waiting on us." Were the first things to come out of his mouth. I nod my head and follow behind him into the restaurant.

Smells good in here.

That's my first thought as I walk into Haengbog, the restaurant that is a few minutes away from our school. I hear a few students in some of my class talk about this place all the time, and how the food is really good and the soju will get you wasted if you drink enough. I've had Korean food before so I'm not a stranger to it and I think it's delicious. The place, in itself, is warm. Cozy. It briefly reminds me of something from an old film. The intimate seating, the dim lights, the smell of sizzling meat, and the trays of fried chicken and beer that were being carried to a table at the corner - all of it felt so invitingly comforting in a strange place; a welcome change.

Jaylen guides me to a table in the back where a seat is already occupied by a smaller woman. Her face is round and hearty, cheeks full and blushed with makeup to only enhance her already glowing tan skin. Her silk black hair was short and bobbed, styled in a way that made her look even more radiant. Jaylen takes a seat next to her and I fall in beside him.

"Did a waitress come yet?" Jaylen asked her and she shook her head, the bob following her every movement like an extension of her body. "Not yet but it's only been a couple of minutes." She answered before turning her attention to me. "You must be Cassian?"

I offer her a smile, my practically beating out of my chest for some reason. "Yes, nice to meet you. Jaylen talks about you all the time."

"What does he say? Does he talk shit?" She leans across the table a bit, sending me a raised-brow look before letting out a small laugh. I'm caught off guard by her personality but then I remember this is the woman who raised Jaylen Park and things start to make a little more sense.

"Hey, anything I want to say to you I can say to your face." Jaylen joins in and his grandma quickly sends him a deadly look that I'm sure all mothers are just naturally born with. The two start bickering in Korean for a bit and I found it assuming how they get along because even though I haven't known her long I can see how well they treat one another that quickly.

"So sorry about the wait. What can I get you to drink–" the waitress finally comes up to our table and when I look up to see her I'm caught off guard to see Mina Choi with an apron tied around her waist and a notepad in her hands.

"Ah, hell no." She lets out a groan when she notices us.

Jaylen gasped a bit. "Choi, what the hell? I didn't know you worked here."

"Well yeah, tuition isn't gonna pay itself so you know." She shrugs her shoulders as she hands us all menus.

Jaylen's grandmother looks up at Mina and then back over at us. "Friend of yours?"

"Halmeoni, this is Mina Choi. She goes to school with us." Jaylen introduce the two, Mina immediately turning to his grandmother and lowering her body a bit in a bow before speaking in Korean. She raises back up and turns to us. "What do you want to drink?" Her soft demeanor when she was speaking to his grandmother was completely wiped away.

Jaylen sent her a smug look that caused Mina to roll her eyes in the other direction before he leaned over to me, eyes trailing down to the menu in my hands despite the one sitting right in front of him. "You know what you want?" he asked me. He's so close his head is practically on my shoulder and I can smell the citrus on him. "I'll have whatever you get," I tell him and sends me a wink before leaning over to his grandmother across the table and doing the same until they both decide on something. Jaylen orders the food and Mina writes it down in her notepad.

"I'll try to get that out to you all as quickly as possible." Mina forces a smile on her lips and Jaylen sends her a small nod.

"Aye, Choi since you work here can we get a discount or something?" He asked her and she made a face at him before turning on her heels and walking away. "I'll think about it." I hear her say.

His grandmother smiled at him from across the table. "She was pretty," she says to him and he flinches a bit in his seat but he quickly collects himself and agrees.

"Yeah . . . she is." He shrugged nonchalantly, eyes glancing over to me but I try not to look at him for too long.

She then turns to me, a hand coming up to straighten out her already straight haircut. "I've never met one of Jaylen's college friends before."

"Really?" I blinked at her.

"Yep," she nods pursing her lips. "You're the first one."

I looked over at Jaylen to see him waiting for me to glance in his direction, a slightly embarrassed look on his face as he tried to sink into his seat a bit from my stare at him. "Have you ever tried Korean food?" his grandmother asking me another question takes my attention away from him.

"I have," I answer.

"That's good. We always come here but it's usually just us so when he said he had a friend coming I wasn't too sure if this would be a nice place to meet," she says, smiling.

"No, the restaurant restaurant is fine. The ambiance, the food - everything is great and wonderful Misses Park." I say, to which she replies "Just Miss Yuna is fine." The look on her face is nothing short of priceless. She beams at my words, to say the least. Her smile reaches her eyes like Jaylen does when he smiles.

Mina returned with a large platter filled with raw meat and vegetables, as well as bowls of white rice. I experimentally placed a thin slice of beef onto the metal grid and watched with fascination as the meat started darkening with a satisfying sizzling noise.
"You like it that thin? Nah, try it like this." Jaylen says to me, reaching over me and cutting up a piece of meat for me and placing it on the grill. "I promise it'll taste better than that little slab you got cooking right now."

"You've never cooked meat for me before." Miss Yuna says to him, as she places her meat on the grill sending him a teasing look. Jaylen bickers back in Korean which only makes Miss Yuna laugh aloud, cheeks growing bright red.

"I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding," she said.

I immediately became engrossed in this new experience, excitedly placing beef and some vegetables onto the griddle. Once one of the slices of meat was cooked, Jaylen took it off the barbeque, dipped it in sauce, wrapped it around in a lettuce wrap, and handed it over to me with his chopsticks. I was almost tempted to just bite it off the chopsticks but then I remembered this grandmother was right in front of us so I refrained and placed it in my hand ignoring the third-degree burn I was giving myself. I tossed it in my mouth and it was delicious.

"Good right? See, I told you."

"Alright, not too much you ain't no Gordon Ramsey."He nudges me playfully before returning to the food and drinks in front of us. I went back to enjoying the barbecue, quickly saving a piece of food that started to burn at the edges.

We eat and eat until our stomachs are full and our table is nothing but laughter and empty bottles of soju. Miss Yuna shows me baby pictures of Jaylen she keeps in her purse and he sits beside me with reddened cheeks, groaning and whining like a child asking her to put them away out of embarrassment. "Jaylen never really gave me any problems growing up. He didn't talk back, he cleaned his, took out the trash, and did whatever was asked of him. I'd say his only problem was sneaking out in the middle of the night thinking I wouldn't notice." She sends him a teasing look and Jaylen makes a face at her.

"I'm gonna get some more drinks before I end up blowing my brains out at this table." He dramatically says to us before excusing himself from the booth and making his way over to Mina who's leaning against the counter on her phone.

"He's so easily flustered. I think it's funny when its face gets all red like a tomato," Yuna said from across the table, a small laugh escaping her lips as her eyes followed him across the restaurant. "he's so sensitive but that's a trait I think he gets from me unfortunately."

I raised a brow at her, taking another swig of my drink. "Jaylen and sensitive are two words I never thought I'd hear in a sentence together."

"Oh he's sensitive," she replies putting the photos back in her purse. "But he knows how to hide his emotions well. He only really opens up around people he likes and cares for." I withhold a smile at her words as the memories of the night Jaylen and I shared after our failed attempt of joining a fraternity, and how we sat on a bench eating tacos trauma bonding all night. I never really knew he was sensitive — or more so I never really thought of him to be but then I remembered how he acted when I first got here and how he hated my guts from the jump and all the things that followed after that start to make a little more sense.

"I would assume he's been very open with you?" I let out a small chuckle. "And why would you think that?"

"Because he's told me," she says in a sweet tone, head rocking side to side in a teasing manner causing the the bob haircut to move right along with her. I sent her a look, brows raising out of curiosity. "He's talking about me to you?"

"Only twice but still more than anyone else he's mentioned from his school," she says to me with a sly smile. "he told me you have a famous dad and that you have a smart mouth."

My face fell flat at that. "Oh . . ."

"He also said you're really smart," Miss Yuna continues with a small chuckle escaping her lips as she plays around with the rice on her plate. "and that you've helped him a lot both on the soccer field and just at school in general and for that I want to say thank you."

"Oh, you don't have to thank me, Miss Yuna-"

She holds up a manicured hand. "I think it's warranted, no? Like I said my grandson doesn't introduce me to a lot of people but when he does I try to get an understanding of them and from what I've gathered about you so far you seem to have a good head-on your shoulders and it seems to be rubbing off on my grandson and for that I am thankful."

"Oh . . ." I don't know why I repeated the word. A singular word that flys out my mouth so easily and yet the smile it leaves stretching on my face holds all the weight. I don't realize I'm smiling until Jaylen's grandmother is looking at me, big brown eyes like his full of kindness and tenderness that it felt like a warm hug — a comforting one that wraps me in and never lets me go. I look over at Jaylen who left to get another drink minutes ago but he's now with Mina at the Dance Dance Revolution machine in the restaurant forcing the poor girl to join him. Mina acts like she doesn't want to join the game but the minute it starts the two are battling it out on the arcade machine looking like a mess not one beat was hit.

Miss Yuna turns back to me with a smile on her face. "Enough about me and Jaylen, how are you feeling? Must be very excited knowing you're a contender for the draft huh?"

"Is it," I replied. "It's all I've ever been working towards so it feels really good knowing that the hard work is paying off, but Jaylen's also a contender and he's really good so it could go either way." I realize how I managed to turn the conversation back around to her grandson after she just tried to switch the subject to something else. I'm making it so obvious and from the grin growing on Miss Yuna's bright round face I might as well be wearing a rainbow shirt right now, but it's hard not to talk about him. For the last few months he's been everything I see, everything I feel and think about. In the midst of it all, amid all the anguish, amid all the misery, Jaylen was my moment of peace.

"Well I'm happy for you and I hope you get the chance to finally make it to the league and finally see your hard work pay off . . ." She takes a sip of her drink before looking over at me again. "But I'd be lying if I didn't say I want Jaylen to get the pick instead."

"It'd be weird if you didn't feel that way, Miss Yuna. He is your grandson after all."

"I know and he's worked so hard to get where he is right now and I'd hate to see all his hard work just go to waste like that if he's not picked. It'll crushed him and I don't think I could bear to see the pain on his face, he's already been through so much, witnessed so much at an early age that I just want this one thing for him."

"I understand."

She looks back at Jaylen who's just finished a dance battle with Mina, the two bickering about the score on the arcade game in front of them, and from Jaylen's taught and Mina aggressively wrapping her hair in a ponytail, I would assume he was victorious.

"Most people are born lucky," Miss Yuna turned back around to me and said, a slight hum in her words as she rested her chin in the palm of her hand on the table. "They're destined for greatness from the day they come into this earth and blessed beyond, but every once in a while, ordinary people with hearts full of hope make little wishes that come true, and suddenly the world becomes a lot more magical for them and anything seems possible, you know?"

Her hands reach across the table and hold onto mine, and as I suspected there's comfort in her palms like that of a hug from an old relative you've missed along the way but could never remember their name. "I think Jaylen is one of those people. I think he knows how to love better than most people which is why he found everything that happened with his mom and his dad, and then with me and my husband all so pitiful because he knows it is not supposed to be like that, and so when he does eventually grow to love someone he does it hard, you think so?"

"Huh?" I blinked at her for a moment as if she'd been speaking a language I couldn't understand, but then she sent me a knowing look and I fumbled under her gaze.

"Cassian, I'm old but I'm not that old," Miss Yuna's soft chuckles filled the booth, and the air around us, was so warm and comforting. "I've been around Jaylen for all nineteen years of his life so I like to think I have a pretty good read on him and his actions if I do say so myself and I see the way he looks at you, he speaks about you, hell he even fixed your food for you. He cares for you deeply, it's easy to see." I don't know whether to feel embarrassed, relieved, a little self-conscious, or maybe all three. My head is a spinning mess at the moment as I look back at the older woman in front of me who's managed to gather so much out of me in such a short period.

"I only ask this one thing," she starts again, hands finally releasing my own and I desperately craved her touch again like some sort of crutch keeping me from falling out of my seat. "Do you care for him?"

Do I care for him? I would do anything for him if he were to ask me. Cross any ocean just to see him, hike any mountain, and wonder about any jungle if it meant I could be with him for just a few minutes. He makes me feel like I can carry the galaxies at my fingertips. He's made flowers grow inside of me in places I didn't know we were still alive. He's made me smile a bit more and laugh a lot louder than anyone else has and I've only known him for all of three months, and in that period I've done things with him I've never done with a single soul. He keeps me grounded in my worst days and gives me hope for a better beginning.

But that's a mouthful so I just exhale a low sigh and smile and settle for a small. "I do."

••••

The dinner with Jaylen and his grandmother was probably one of the best dinners I've had in a while I've had dinner at Lebron James' house before and I still had a million times more fun tonight. Mina even got her boss to cover to bill for us so we didn't even have to pay anything. We walked Miss Yuna back to her hotel which wasn't that far from the restaurant and watched her make her way inside, endlessly waving at us like she wouldn't see us again tomorrow. When she finally inside I turned to Jaylen to see him already looking at me.

"Did you tell your grandmother about us?" I asked him.

He blinks at me rapidly like that's a response, but then he collects himself and kisses his teeth. "What the hell are you talking about Bergman why I would do something so stupid— I did, I told her that we might have a little something going on my bad."

"Jaylen!"

"I said my bad. She just asked who is this mysterious person I'm bringing to dinner and I just started talking about how smart and cool you were and it might've let it slip out a bit."

My gaze softened a bit and I nudged him with my shoulder. "It's okay and I'm pretty sure she would've figured it out anyway from the awkwardness I was at the table. At least she's accepting, I love that for you . . . well us? Wait, are we an us? Is what we do considered an us thing?"

I don't realize I'm rambling until Jaylen makes a face at me, head tilting to the side like a lost puppy. "Bergman, you just had dinner with the important person in my life. What do you think?"

"I mean it's just we've never had that conversation," I tell him. Jaylen stuffs his hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth on his tennis shoes. "We're having it now, aren't we? Or am I tripping?"

"I think we both are."

"So are we boyfriends?"

"Boyfriends is crazy . . ." I shake my head at the word, a slight chuckle escaping my lips. "But I think we are. I don't know this first year being gay so I don't know how this works."

"Mine too, so let's just go with the flow."

We both nod at each other before extending out our hands and dapping one another up, bringing each other in and patting the back. We break away and make a face at one another before bursting out into a fit of laughter.

"We kinda suck at being gay."

"There's no manual on how to be LGBT, I don't think."

"Are we LGBT?"

"I think so," Jaylen scratches his head and puckers his lips in thought for a moment. "But I think we're just the B. Do we gotta get ignited into it like a gang?"

"We should've asked Mina before we left."

Jaylen shakes his head. "Let's try this shit again and let's get it right this time," he clears his throat and straighten up his posture before looking at me with a determined smile. "boyfriends?" he asked, the word rolling off his tongue with so much force I found it hard to contain my laughter but I fix myself and straighten up my neck and face him with my head on strong. "boyfriends!"

Without warning Jaylen leaps into my chest, arms tattooed wrapping my neck and I without much hesitation start to swing the 6'feet something athlete around like a child, our laughter filling the streets of the city. I finally place him down after a few spins, the laughter still on our lips.

"Okay, that was very LGBT of us." He nods in approval.

"Alright, we're getting there," I tell him before leaning to press my lips to his, the kiss is the sweetness of passion, a million loving thoughts condensed into a single moment. In the moment of the kiss, we are our pure and vulnerable selves. In his kiss, I am home.

We pull apart, lips wet, and blood rushing. Jaylen ran another hand through his silky dark hair, teeth biting down on his bottom lip as he looked at me. "Now that was gay." I rolled my eyes playfully before nudging him with my shoulder as we began to start making our way back to campus, but before we could step too far, I heard someone from behind us.

"Excuse me, excuse me," the voice calls out.

Both Jaylen and I turn around confused. We turned to see an older-looking man, with a large smile on his face chubby face. I could sense Jaylen sizing the man up, his eyes scanning him up and down prepared to pounce at any moment but then I noticed the man was wearing one of my father's jerseys, my last name plastered on the back.

"You're CJ Bergman's son!" The fan of my father said knowingly. At this age I'm used to my father's fan coming up to me though it's become more uncommon in the last few years It still happens from time to time, and with him being in the city I'm sure it's bound to happen a little more now. "Can I get a picture?"

Jaylen sent me a look wanting me not to but I don't want to be an asshole so I turned back to the man and shrug my shoulders. "Sure but it has to be quick," I tell him and the man nods hurriedly, before practically shoving Jaylen out of the way and holding up his cracked phone to snap a quick picture. I force a quick smile.

"Thank you so much. I'm a real big fan of your dad and your brother." He tells me and I still keep that forced smile on me as I nod. "Thanks, they appreciate the support." I wave at him as an indication that that's all I can do for him right now. I turned around and Jaylen followed as we began our journey back to campus.

"I don't know how to feel about having a famous boyfriend," Jaylen says smartly and I roll my eyes at him. "I'm not famous. My dad is famous, and besides if you wanna make it to the league you're gonna have to get used to people wanting to take pictures of you all the time."

"Yeah, whatever."

••••
EXCUSE ANY MISTAKES OR ERRORS

Nobody:

Miss Yuna and her bob: