THE HOUSE OF Zeta Alpha looks like something straight up on Bridgerton. A white Georgian-style home with four long white columns that reach up to the second floor, the fraternity Greeks letters in black just below the roof. It's huge and a little intimidating at first but as I walk down the stone path that leads to the black-painted front door entrance of the place I exhale a breath to relax my nerves. I pause in my steps a few yards away from the entrance where a couple of other guys made their way through in their tuxedos. I looked down at mine, pressing a hand against the black Armani Exchange polyester blazer to straighten it out along with the white shirt underneath it. I adjust the black bow tie around my neck and inhale and exhale one last breath before continuing my journey inside.

I make my way up the stone steps that lead into the Zeta house directly behind a few other guys. The moment I enter through the door I'm greeted by an underclassmen in white button-ups and slacks. In his hands is a silver tray with glasses filled to the brim with something. He offers me one and I politely take it before walking off and taking a cautious sip.

It's champagne.

I continue walking in the house, taking in the traditional exterior of the place. It's no secret that Zeta is a very exclusive and lavish fraternity. Their membership is ridiculously overpriced and just getting a single interview to get in takes a lot of work, and with so many men of high society donating to their organization they only seem to grow more prestigious and it is clear as I walk around the lavish house that they've been putting my father and the other Zeta Alpha alumni money to use.

There's a fireplace burning as I enter the main room, and three beautiful chandeliers hanging from the high ceiling. There was a very expensive black designed rug covering the middle of the floor underneath some of the furniture, a white plain one under the piano in the far right corner. Portraits lined the walls, some large and some smaller, each with a different face of a man that belonged to the Zeta Alpha Frat. I stared at them for a moment, an eerie feeling creeping up my spine as I thought of those pictures watching me as I went down the line from the founder in 1902 to the current times, coming across a familiar face that made my lips press into a thin line.

I never notice how much I and my father look alike until I was reminded in times like these when his face is the first thing that catches my attention. Same head shape, almond eyes, heart-shaped lips, and a cheeky smile to go along with all the things that make CJ Bergman the man he is today. I don't know how to feel as I look at his picture — a part of me thinks I should be proud to be here, to be following in the steps of my father making him proud, cementing myself in the Bergman legacy but then there's another part of me that can't help but think how all of this is so stupid and out the blue and I don't belong here.

What if they don't accept me? Will my father be upset? Suddenly, my blazer felt too big around my shoulders, and my tie too tight around my neck. Am I fit for this? Do I belong here? My thoughts started to get to me and the high ceilings seemed to circle around me, closing in. The rays of light emitted from the chandeliers that hung from the ceiling seemed too bright and I have to blink several times to recollect myself.

I can't let myself fall apart - not today

"Well, well, well . . ." A familiar voice snaps me out of my thoughts and I turn around to see Jaylen behind me with his hands stuffed inside the pockets of a surprisingly nice-looking suit. "I knew I smelled bitch in here."

"You're smelling your top lip," I tell him, matching his hardening stare.

Oddly enough and much to my dismay, the suits he wore tonight cling it him nicely and for once he looks like a decent human being. His graphic T-shirts, shorts, and Jordans were replaced with something more subtle for tonight's occasion, his black hair styled nicely in a way a few strands covers his big forehead. He honestly looks like a different person in this light but then he takes my glass of champagne from my hands and downs the whole thing in a single gulp, a low burp escaping his mouth and he's back to normal.

"You disgust me."

He rolls his eyes, twirling the empty champagne glass in between his fingers. "Yeah, and this damn suit is fucking choking me so I guess we all just have our own issues tonight huh?"

"Dinner will begin in fifteen minutes," a voice calls from the center of the room causing both of us to turn around to see who it belongs to. I see it's Tatum after a few moments, he's in the middle of the floor surrounded by everyone as he continues to speak. "but until then why don't we start with introductions."

"We'll go around the room in a circle," Tatum instructed, the few already pledged Zetas behind him nodding in agreement.

Everyone got in a circle in the middle of the room as we were instructed. Another round of champagne has been offered and I politely decline the underclassmen who came by while Jaylen gladly accepted, taking two off the tray. I made sure to not be close to him as we formed the circle, standing directly on the opposite side of him. When he notices me staring at him he sticks his tongue out like a child, brows furrowing and face scrunching up in a way that irked me like no other. I would've done it back but I could see Tatum and the others watching me from the corner of my eye and I refrained.

Each guy in the room gives a little bit about himself like his name, where he's from, what he likes to do, and why he's interested in joining Zeta. When it was nearing my turn, I exhale a breath I didn't even know I was holding but I gathered myself quickly once all the eyes in the room turned to me.

"I'm Cassian Bergman," I began, making sure my voice was loud and clear so that everyone could hear me. I try my best to ignore Jaylen's stare from across the circle, a slight smirk on his lips that I want so badly to smack off. "I'm originally from DC, but I was born in New York. I like soccer and my reason for joining Zeta is to be a part of something bigger than myself, an organization that holds its men to a higher standard of living while also teaching them valuable life lessons in the process." I just said nothing but the men in the circle all clapped for me, I looked over at Tatum to see him smiling at me with a nod of approval.

More and more guys go around introducing themselves, most of it all sounding the same and after a while, I start to zone out. Until all the eyes in the room fall on Jaylen. He seems unfazed by the stares of everyone, a pleased smirk on his pink lips as he meets them all with a confident glint in his eyes.

"Wassup, I'm Jaylen Park. Born and raised in Oakland," he nods his head at that part making a smug look on his face as his hands fly up making an O with his fingers earning a few chuckles from the others. "I like to play soccer I'm pretty sure you all have seen me out there, and I want to be a part of Zeta alpha because . . . it seems cool." his words so nonchalant and effortless.

A round of applause is offered to the boy, Tatum and the other Zeta members sending him nods and smiles. "I appreciate the honest Jaylen." Tatum smiled at him.

Jaylen shrugged his broad shoulders. "The best policy baby," he says with a smirk. I rolled my eyes at his obnoxious confidence.

The next person was introduced and after everyone was done the food was done, and we were escorted to the dining area of the house. There's a long table clothed with a white sheet and on it are white plates and silver utensils, designated seating that is provided by the cards on the table with our names on them. Everyone starts to search for their name and seats the table. I find mine in the middle and take my seat, taking the card with my name written on it.

Cassian Bergman

"The third . . ." Jaylen's voice randomly comes in beside me as he takes a seat next to me. He takes the card from in front of him, his Korean name written on it and his lips pursed upwards.

Why did they have to sit him by me?

Once everyone is seated Tatum talks some more before the servers start coming out with the food and drinks. The menu tonight consisted of Butternut Squash Ravioli with Rosemary Browned Butter. The portions are small as usual but it's just the appetizer so I didn't expect much to begin with. A steak for the main course, with mashed potatoes and asparagus. The steak would be personally cooked to our liking so the servers came around and asked everyone how they would like theirs cooked.

"And for you sir? How would you like your steak served?" the man asked Jaylen who was too busy chugging down another glass of champagne he didn't even notice him a first, but when he did he quickly removed the glass from his lips, wiping away the wetness with his sleeve.

"Umm . . ." he thought for a moment, eyes wandering around the place. "on a plate," he answered.

"N-no, sir. How would you like your stake cooked?"

Jaylen sent the man another look, brows raising at him. "On a stove?"

"He'll have it medium well," I interject once I see the server getting impatient with him, and he nods before moving on to the next person. I looked down at the table to see Tatum already staring at us, an amusing smile on his thin lips and that's when I realize this isn't just a dinner but also a test. An easy way to see if we have the manners and etiquette it takes to become a Zeta and Jaylen was failing miserably.

"What the hell is this," Jaylen raised a brow as he pokes around the appetizer with his fork. "where's the real food?"

"This is the real food idiot. Just eat it." I tell him lowly.

He rolls his eyes to the other side of the room. "This is a kid's meal. Two bites and I'm already done. If I would've known they'd be feeding us like this I would've stopped by Mcdonald's."

"Can you stop complaining? They're watching us."

Jaylen makes a face before he follows my glances toward the end of the table and sees Tatum and the others staring at everyone eating. The blonde notices Jaylen and sends me an acknowledging head nod that he returns moments later.

"Shit . . ." he mumbled.

"Just eat . . . carefully." I squint my eyes at him, my legs brushing up against his under the table. "and stop slouching and get your elbows off the table."

Jaylen quickly snaps into proper form, his eyes scanning me up and down realizing he's not mirroring me. "Jesus Christ, is this the kinda shit they teach you in Nepo baby school?" he asked, inserting a fork full of food in his mouth.

"Don't talk with food in your mouth," I whispered to him, nudging his leg beneath the table.

He swallows and sends me a look. "Alright now, don't start something you can't finish Bergman." he nudges me back under the table.

"I'm trying to help you out. You're the one embarrassing yourself."

Jaylen scoffed. "Please, they love me. Unlike you, I have an authentic personality and not some cardboard cut out of someone else."

Jaylen's words cause me to halt in my movement, his words hitting me harder than they should've to be honest. It's like a poison dart has just been shot into my neck and the poison drained through me rather than skating over my skin. I blinked at him, holding back the unknown feeling that seeped through me because of what he said. "Fine." I managed to mumble after a few moments had passed turning my attention back to my own plate.

••••

After a non-fulfilling dinner, everyone went back to the main room to talk and network about God's know-what. I too much didn't care at this point, and after that unpleasant meal that barely did anything to my stomach, I just wanted to get out of there. I don't belong here with these guys and I don't want to. I raised a glass of champagne to my lips and took a sip, the bubbly drink doing nothing to bring up my already somber mood.

My eyes move around the room at everyone talking amongst each other as I stood isolated in the corner of the room by the fireplace. Jaylen was in his own little corner talking to a group of people, his eyes wide and eccentric as he rambled on to the others. They looked at him with a certain glint in their eyes, he holds up a finger and everyone stops to listen to what he has to say. He has that vibe to him, one that easily draws anyone in. Maybe he was right about me. Maybe I just don't have the personality for this, and maybe I am just a copy and paste of someone else.

"Cassian . . ." a voice calls from the side snapping me of my thoughts. I turned to see Tatum with a wide smile standing in front of me.

"Oh, hey Tatum," I replied, trying to mirror his smile with one of my own but it didn't come off as authentic.

"Can I bother you for a little chat?"

I nod my head and Tatum gestures for me to follow before turning on his designer loafers. I walk behind him as he leads the way to a more secluded place of the house where a few others members of Zeta stood in their suits with drinks in hand.

"How'd you enjoy tonight?" Tatum asked, the others joining us.

I shrugged my shoulders up at him. "It was fine. Something different for me."

"Different in a good way I hope." one of the zetas chimed with a slight chuckle, the other joining in shortly after.

Tatum nods in agreement. "I brought you over here away from everyone else because I wanted to let you know firsthand that you've been accepted."

I blinked at him. "Really?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't we accept you? You meet all the qualifications and then some," another Zeta adds from the side. "you easily fit in."

I made a face at them. "Do I though?"

"Of course," Tatum nods. "one of the most qualified in the room if I'm being honest. Right boys?" he turned back to the members behind us, and they all nod in agreement but even with all this approval I still couldn't find it in me to be happy.

"How else did you think we'd pick? Jaylen Park? Please," Tatum let out a scoff, the other erupting into laughter behind him. "let me you in a little secret Cassian," he leaned in closer. "I only invited him here because I just wanted to laugh. He's so stupid I'm sure the only thing in his head is a monkey playing the tambourine. Did you see him eating? It's like watching a child."

"And his speech? What the hell were those symbols he made with his hands?" another Zeta chimes.

"I doubt he even has enough money for the membership." 

I don't like this. Not one bit. I don't like how they're standing here talking about him like he's lesser than for things that just make him — well, him. He's from Oakland, that's his city and he loves his city as a person should he's not the type to go to five-star restaurants in his free time? He shouldn't be judged for things like that.

"But you Cassian," Tatum turns back to me, placing a hand on my shoulder as he cocked his head at me with a smile that I wanted so badly to smack off. "you have everything we're looking for. Plus you are a legacy child. Do you know awesome it would be for our Zeta Alpha fraternity if we had the son of the CJ Bergman as part of our house? We'd be the talk of Zetas around the country."

So this is what this is all about. I'm so stupid. I should've figured it out from the start. These guys don't actually like me for who I am, what I have to offer, or any of that. They just care about my last name and just want it attached to their stupid fraternity for bragging purposes.

"I-I'll be right back," I tell them when the realization starts to kick in. Tatum sends me a look before nodding and turning around to the other members. I make my way back through the house trying to digest the last ten minutes in my head.

I turn a corner and see Jaylen in the main room talking to the others. They laugh at something he says, and I walk over there and latch a hand on his wrist. "Lemme talk to you for a second," I say without giving him a chance to decline because I drag us away from everyone else to a more sectioned-off place of the house.

"Woah, Bergman, thank God you don't be yanking on my dick like this," he whispers harshly I move us into the secluded corner.

"We need to get out of here," I tell him.

"W-what? Why?"

"We don't need to be here."

Jaylen made a face, brows knitting together. "What the hell are you talking about? Did you have too many glasses of champagne?" he presses the back of his hand against my forehead and I slap it away.

"No Jaylen," I kissed my teeth. "these Zetas just wanted me to join their stupid fraternity because of my dad, and they just were talking so much shit about you earlier and I-"

"Which one was it?" Jaylen parked, eyes widened a bit as he searched the area. "What they said? I'll whoop their ass."

I grab ahold of his balled fists to keep him in place. "No, let's just go. It's not even worth it. I can't believe I'm so stupid. I should've known something was up from the jump."

Jaylen look at me and shook his head. "You're not stupid. How the hell were you supposed to know these dudes are assholes? If anything they're the idiots, not you."

I exhaled a heavy sigh. "Let's just get out of here. I'll feel a lot better once I'm out and away from these people."

Jaylen looks down at me then, our eyes locking on one another. Oakwood hazel meeting dark obsidian and for the first time tonight, I don't feel so alone. His eyes remind me of sunshine, like a warm hug warming the bones, it feels safe, and with them on me how could I have ever felt alone? It erupts a strange feeling in my stomach that makes my grip on Jaylen's balled fist loosen a bit.

"We can go but I gotta do one last thing first," Jaylen says to me, a playful grin stretching on his lips.

"And that would be?"

He moves past me. "Just watch this," he reassures with a wink before rushing back to the main room with everyone else.

I follow behind to see Jaylen shuffle back into the room. He grabs one of the wine glasses from the underclassmen, banging a spoon against it causing a loud dinging noise across the room that immediately catches everyone's attention. "Yo, everyone!" Jaylen calls for everyone's full attention as he jumps up on the nearby dining table still clinging the spoon against the class. Whispers could be heard across the room as everyone watches the boy on the table, and I couldn't fight the curiosity that came over me wondering what he the hell ye has up his sleeve.

"Is that everyone?"  Jaylen asked, giving the glass one last ding before it shatters in his hand, champagne and glass falling to the floor. "Oops." Jaylen smiles teasingly before tossing the rest of the glass to the floor without a care.

"What is going on?" Tatum's voice could be heard as he finally comes into the room with the others from before. He notices Jaylen on the table and his green eyes widen. "What are you doing!"

"Oh wassup Tatter Tot," Jaylen winks at the boy. "I'm just trying to get the party started that's all. Everyone here looks so lifeless and boring I thought I was watching The Walking Dead."

"Get down right now Jaylen." The boy shakes his head no, a childish smug on his face as he folds his arms across his chest warranting a few chuckles from the people in the crowd. 

"I just wanna everyone to open up a little," Jaylen continues. "We're in college for Christ's sake and here we are stuck in a fraternity house drinking champagne — cheap champagne by the way because I'm on my sixth glass and I'm still sober. Anyways, this shit is boring and the whole "event" you had planned for tonight is bullshit. They're not gonna accept most of you here and you wanna know why? Because Zeta fucking sucks. Their entire organization was built upon elitism and privilege and if you don't benefit from those two things then I got some news for you buddy. . ."

"So why waste time here trying to get accepted into this boring ass organization, wearing these ridiculous uncomfortable suits when you can go down the block to a party that accepts everyone!?" Jaylen asks the boys, a lot of them nodding in agreement to my surprise. I looked over at Tatum and the others to see their face redden with anger as Jaylen continued on, the boys agreeing with him more and more as he ranted.

"Jaylen get down right now!" Tatum demanded, pale face completely red he looks like a tomato.

Jaylen sent him a look, "if you say so boss," somehow someway Jaylen slides off the table, leaning forward so that it falls over with him along with all the clutter on it, glass and plates smashing to the floor, food, and drinks spilling everyone. Tatum let out a blood-curdling scream at the sight and Jaylen just laughed aloud as he rounded up the guys that didn't want to stay and marched them outside.

Tatum fell to his knees when the room became nearly empty with only himself and the previous Zetas standing in there alone. He turned back to me to see me leaning against the wall, his tear-stained eyes practically pleading with mine. I sent him one last wave before pushing myself out the wall and making my way outside with the others. "See ya Tator Tot."

••••

EXCUSE ANY MISTAKES OR ERRORS

Cassian in his little suit tonight :)