No Fighting Please

Chapter 2

We were all staring at Charles. Charles had his watch precisely set with the clocks of this school. So the second he would stand up that meant the bell was JUST about to ring.

This was the only way he could have any sort of attention. Charles was pretty low in the social latter; blame it on his annoying laugh that you could hear through all the school. Loud and annoying.

My chin was starting to throb a little from the hit it had just taken. I hoped it wouldn't bruise... Last thing I wanted was to have the teacher call the DPJ. My parents didn't fancy authorities that much. Go figure.

They also had a problem with parental authority. Well that depended really. When mom really got worked up about something, like that time I broke the new dishes set she had JUST bought at Stokes, while taking it out of the box she had almost murdered me. Dad could get angry at you too. When you stood in front of the TV during a hockey game. Especially the Canadians. Because he wanted them to lose. Yes even after all those years he was still a Nordiques fan. If you said "Dad don't you know the Nordiques aren't a team anymore?" he would tell you "Oh they still are... they still are" and do a double tap on his chest or something.

Oh phoque!

Charles just got up. I was three seconds late!

I grabbed my agenda and pencil case and binder that were already stacked up and ran out, trying to follow Vincent and Emma who were making their way out the class.

When I reached Vincent I kicked his butt just for the fun of it. And well my chin too. But mostly for the "YeeeEEP" sounds he does and the jumping on the spot. He looks like a girl when he does that. Priceless, really.

Vinc turned around and pointed me "You. Trouble!"

I pointed at him too, sticking my tongue out like a two year old "You. Idiot! Me. Chin in pain!"

"You two! No fighting! Especially in the stairs! You'll knock out Sec Ones again!" Emma told us, using her mommy voice while we started to descent the stairs.

There were four levels to this school. The basement where our lockers were. Then the first one with the cafeteria and the gym in the second wing and the art rooms. Then on the second, the one where we were, it was the library and the math classes and all the other filling ones. Third floor were the science labs and the French classes, the English classes and the History class that looked like a museum with all the artefact in it. But you only had course in that one in Secondary Four. We were in Secondary Five now. Our last year of school until we went to Cégep; college.

So now we needed to go down four set of stairs. Four filled, packed, stacked with teenagers flight of stairs.

"Come on! That was awesome! Who doesn't like to see a kid roll down two flight of stairs crying!" Vinc grinned like an imbecile and the kid beside him recoiled in fright.

That too was priceless.

"I don't care about the kid! I'm just saying that you aren't allowed to break Azé's bones. That's a rule" Em said, pushing us a little because some dang stupid kid was going up the other way and phoquing all up the flow.

"Well we're good at breaking rules, speaking of breaking rules want to come and blow up mailboxes with me and Benjamin tonight?" Vinc asked.

Of course he wasn't inviting Em. You needed to run fast to do that. Emma didn't run. Like not "Run fast", Em simply didn't run. She didn't enjoy it. She also couldn't swim and bike. It was the whole "Not touching the ground" factor that scared the crap out of her. Go figure.

"We're going shopping tonight" I told him, gesturing between Em and I.

"Girls" Vinc just said rolling his eyes.

And we had reached our level and the boys lockers were on the left and the girl ones were on the right so that's where we separated.

"Call me if you get bored!" he shouted from over his shoulder and I waved at him and rushed to my locker to get my things because my bus driver was a maniac and he didn't like to wait for us so if I didn't run to it he would leave without me.

"What time do you want me to pick you up?" Em asked me when we both had our bags on our back and were going up the stairs again to leave.

"How about quarter past five?"

With Emma you always needed to wait at the very least half an hour after the time she said she would arrive. So with forty five minutes earlier I would be sure we'd leave for six.

Shops closed at nine on Thursdays and Fridays and we were Friday. That was one of the many really sucky things about Québec. The fact that shop closed so early all the other days.

"Perfect!" she smiled and then went our way to where her car was parked while I ran to the front of the school where the doors to the reception was, to take my bus.

I would have liked to have a car like Em, but for many reasons -one being the fact that I had failed the practical driving test at forty four percent, when you needed seventy-five to pass- I didn't. Also the rule at home was pay half the price of the car and I didn't believe in the whole raising money deal. I believed in buying CDs with it actually.

Charlotte my Human-Sized-Bratz fourteen year old sister was already there waiting for the bus too with her uniform skirt WAY too short -she had tricked it- and the white blouse unbutton. This was just SCREAMING "Mister Teacher I've been really REALLY naughty, but I need an A... what can I do? and then insert batting of eyelashes" porn.

It was a shame really. She used to be less girly girl and more outdoorsy. It was a given since we lived in the middle of nowhere and we were surrounded by forest at the back of our yard, well actually there was a big hill right at the back of my house we would climb up during winter to slide down with our crazy carpets. And across the street, there was one of the many rivers of Québec. St-Amant River actually. Not the nicest one to be honest considering the bottom of it was filled with "pitounes" old lugs that had been thrown in the river from a city up north to then go all the way down to the paper factory in our town. Some lugs sunk in. The bark too. In the end it made the bottom of the river all gooey. Few years back the municipality had started to clean the bottom of it and it was actually nice now, but eight years ago you would have needed to pay me to put my big toe in it.

Well I did go fishing with dad and Frank. I was there mostly to kill the little "téteux" though... the silvery fish that they would caught and that were no good to eat. I enjoyed squishing them on rocks to let the bird feed on them. Yes I was sick that way. But hey! I fed birds!

But we did caught bigger fish too. Once we had caught one huge one, like at least two feet and we had put it in the bathtub to freak mom. Her screams most have been heard all the way up to Chibougamau.

Anyway, point being, we spent a lot of time outside, all seasons long. Charlotte used to always join us, follow her bigger siblings. But ever since she had started Secondary she had developed a little attitude. A prancing skank attitude actually. It would have been lying to say Charlie was ugly. She was beautiful, everyone knew that. And apparently she did too. And she knew it GOOD.

I loved my little sister though, don't get me wrong. I just would have wished she hadn't become superficial with age. It was such a cliché thing. I would have wished she made a personality for herself, and tried to be someone unique, developing her talent and qualities on something a little less vain than painting her face like a clown every morning.

And mom didn't do anything about it because she liked having a girly girl.

I wasn't a girly girl. I didn't enjoy losing time on make up. Why? I had a small acne problem in my first teen years. I hadn't look like a monster or anything but I didn't have a baby doll face. Tried every lotion and cream possible. It would have either dry up my skin or grease it up. I had gotten enough of it at one point and just abandoned the whole project. The whole project being my face.

Now it was much better, but yes I was still self conscious about it and if anyone made mean jokes about it I would round house kick them in the face.

When I raised my head I realized I was almost home.

Of course Charlie didn't sit with me in the bus. She was sitting in the back speaking with two boys that lived on our street, batting her mascara soaked eyelashes.

I just rolled my eyes and turned the volume of my music louder.

When Charlotte and I got home, mom and dad were still at work, as usual. Dad worked for Hydro-Québec and mom was a dental hygienist.

Charlie just dropped her bag right beside the door and rushed to her room, probably to go on Facebook for the rest of the night. Or maybe she'd go meet up with a bunch of her girl friends and they would do voodoo crap with dead chicken legs. I really didn't mind what she did of her days.

The shower was running so either way Frank was home or there was some random person taking a shower in our house. It was a conclusion to consider since we never locked the door. Like ever.

I walked up to the fridge, taking out bread, ham, Swiss cheese, salad, mayonnaise and tomatoes to make myself a nice sandwich. I was starving. Always starving.

When I was putting mayonnaise on my toasted bread, Frank got out of the shower, towel around the waist, shaking his hair like a dog.

"You making me one right?" he said, sitting at the end of the counter, grabbing a tomato and raising it to his mouth.

"Of course I am" I answered him and slapped his hand "And this Frank is a tomato and as far as I remember you don't enjoy eating it raw that way"

My nineteen year old brother frowned at me for a second and then looked intently at the tomato in his hand. And then he shrugged and gave it back to me.

I rolled my eyes at him.

Weirdo.

While I cut the tomato, Frank started to go on and on about a new product the group Gorillaz was selling. Vibrating figures of the members

"... why in hell would someone want to buy that? I'm sorry but me, Gorillaz's drummer, I wouldn't pay two hundred bucks to shove him in my sushi buffet"

I choked on the gulp of the chocolate milk I had just drank "What the phoque?" I coughed.

"I'm just saying"

"And why would you assume that's its main purpose?"

"Kid, do I need to have the sexual stimuli talk with you?"

"Christ, Frank, what did you smoke today?"

"I rolled a joint as big as a chair leg. Honestly why would you assume I'm high? I had school today too"

"You go to Cégep"

"Thanks for reminding me. I am planning on dropping and helping Pablo on his raw material production."

"Raw material being weed?"

"You're a quick learner."

"Anyway why the heck would you drop? Isn't your Cote R, thirty four or something and you're in Science? "

"Ya" he snorted and then we both said "Go figure" shaking our heads.

That's when dad's car parked in the drive way. And that something flickered in Frank's eyes.

"Don't move alright?" he asked and then took my knife which I had been using to cut the tomato out of my hands and then he opened the fridge and took the ketchup out and poured some all over the knife and then some more on himself.

I was shaking my head at him.

Weirdo.

Frank then ran to the front door and opened it hurriedly.

"Oh god! DAD! I didn't mean to... OH MY GOD! Azélie's bleeding! But like, A LOT!" he screamed on the porch, holding the knife up high, ketchup drooling on his chest.

I could hear my dad's voice, getting out of the car, by the open window on the side of the house "You tried the exact same thing two weeks ago Frank but with Charlie"

Frank started to curse while dad walked in and asked me "What as your brother been smoking?"

I just shrugged and dad shook his head "Where's your sister"

"Talking with pedophile on the Internet"

Dad eyes narrowed at me and I just gave him a big grin.

"Alright then. I'm going to take a shower, you can enjoy that ketchup on yourself Frank" dad said and walked to the bathroom while my brother kept cursing and then sat back on his stool.

I cut his sandwich in half while he started to try to get some ketchup off himself with his hand but he didn't have a napkin or anything to put it one so he just started at his hands for two seconds, completely covered with ketchup, frowning and then shrugged and licked it off.

Again, weirdo.

After giving him his sandwich I asked him "Frank, I'd like to know how your mind works. What do you think when you wake up?"

This was for prosperity. I mean how could a guy be so bright on paper but so dumb in life?

"Well in the morning I wake up and I jerk myself" he answered, still licking the ketchup off.

I closed my eyes, shaking my head yet again, snorting in disbelief

"Joke." he added "I never jerk myself in the morning"

"So what? Every afternoon when you get back from Cégep?"

"Yes exactly. Me, city bus or not, at four twenty-three I jerk that sucker"

"You're gross"

"You asked"

"I'm never going to be anywhere NEAR you at four twenty-three then."

"That would be wise" Frank grinned at me and then took a big bite of sandwich, making salad fall all over him.

I laughed at him, shaking my head and left him there taking my sandwich with me.

My brother was an idiot; there was no denying in that.

I climbed up the stairs and turned left, opening the door of my room, glad to smell the comforting smell of it and then stripped out of my sucky school uniform as I opened my lap top. I checked through my mails, while slipping in my jeans and plain blue t-shirt and eating too. I took a few minutes to get on MSN and send Vinc a stupid picture and checked the link he had sent me to a video of a dude singing with way too much enthusiasm "Tu veux mon zizi" doing a pathetic two step dance and I was laughing alone.

Sending each other stupidities was one of the many things we enjoyed doing.

Vinc and I had been friends for a long time. We had always been in the same school, but never in the same class until my first year of Secondary. We had talked before and hung out -Benjamin and I used to compete to know who had the best grades ever since first grade and Ben and Vinc were best friend- so of course I had spent time with him before, but it wasn't until Secondary One that I had really start to just hang with him not because I was tagging along.

It was so simple with him. I could do or say anything and there was never a moment where I would think "ooh I'm making a fool of myself" or "I shouldn't be doing this or saying this" there was no double guessing. Truth is Emma always said that we were both the version of the other but different gender. And it really did feel that way sometimes. With Vincent I didn't have to be anything else but myself and speak anything else but my mind. It was as effortless as breathing.

And I couldn't be more grateful for a friend like him.

I was cut from my mind rambling by the door of my room abruptly opening.

"Is your internet working? Cause mine just crashed?" Charlie asked, still wearing her uniform.

I refreshed an internet page and it showed the "Internet page you have search was not found" thingy thing. "Nope, not working either"

"Stupid rooter! Well could you go unplug it" she asked me.

I rolled my eyes "You're a big girl, you can do it yourself"

"But you're using internet too"

"Christ, Charlie, I'm just done with it. I don't need it anymore. I don't care. Do it yourself"

"You're so lazy!" she whined and walked out.

What the hell? Why was she complaining about me? There really was no making sense into kids these days.

.

At five past six, Emma's car drove into our long driver way.

"Bye guys!" I screamed as I put on my shoes.

Mom still hadn't come back from work. Charlotte was in her room, showing her boobies to strangers on Charoulette -Christ I hoped she didn't-, and Frank was in his room doing... oh I didn't even want to know that one. Dad was sitting in front of the TV. The way our house was built, it was, you walk in and it's all open and there's the living room on your right and in front of you it's the dinning room/kitchen.

"What time are you coming back?" dad asked, his eyes fixed on the TV. Sport channel. A golf game. Lame.

"Don't know. Not too late"

"Alright, have fun" he said and raised the volume.

I snorted, shaking my head but still walked out the house and to Emma's car.

There was no "Sorry for being late" that needed to be mention. It was standard procedure at this point.

"So, where to first?" Emma asked smiling while I buckled my seat belt and she drove out of the long driveway.

"Huh! Dah! Archambault!"

"Then Archambault it is!" she smiled wider.

Archambault was one of the best place to buy books and CDs. Or course most of the times the CDs at Archambault cost more than the ones at HMW but it was one of the only places where we found books in English. Translated books was one of the thing we hated the most because you kinda lost the essence of the real thing when it was translated, plus sometimes they cut out stuff.

Problem was, the closest Archambault was half an hour drive from where we lived, so we didn't always take the time to go super duper often.

"So anything new since, well, two hours ago?" Emma asked me chuckling.

"Nope..." I trailed, taking her iPod which was plugged in the radio to chose which song to play "Oh well, stay away from my brother around four twenty three"

"Should I be asking question?"

"No you should not" I laughed shortly and let Annette Hanshaw's "Mean to Me" play. I had sent it to Emma. I had buzz like that sometimes. I would hear a song and if I liked it I would buy and download everything I could find on that person. I barely ever did any cleaning in my infinite playlist and when I let it go random I had some fun surprises. Mean to Me had been one of those.

Emma was mockingly singing, moving her shoulders with the beat making me laugh but that's when I really paid attention to the lyrics.

"Existential question! Is there people pathetic enough to stay home waiting for a call? Like really, stay home by the phone waiting for the call?" I suddenly asked Em.

She stopped singing and snorted "Yes"

I shook my head and changed songs "That's the kind of people Télé-Jeune runs with"

"No respect what so ever for people that are in love!" Em chuckled, making a little snapping sound with her tongue, shaking her head.

"What can I say people that are in love are pathetic!" I shrugged.

"Tsss! You should be ashame of yourself!" she kept shaking her head, an amuse smile on her lips.

"Oh please! I'm sure Vinc would totally agree with me on that one! It was actually one of our future activity to make fun of the ridiculous way people in love act!" I smirked at her.

"Oh please you! And Vinc can't be brought into this argument, the boy would pretty much agree on everything you say!"

"Eeeh? Sorry! Are we talking about the same Vinc? You know the one I'm constantly fighting and arguing with?"

"The very same"

"And you are aware that we all but fight in the mud over some things?"

"Foreplay" she simply stated

"What?!" I almost shrieked in surprise.

"You know, you're letting him think he has a chance. And there's really nothing worse than thinking you have a chance when you really don't"

"What are you even talking about? I'm not leading him on! He doesn't like me! I don't like him that way, he doesn't like me that way! That plain simple! He's like a freaking brother to me alright!"

What the phoquedy phloqued?

"Well you ain't like a sister to him, sister." she told me, half grinning.

"Christ Em! He doesn't like me! Actually, I think he likes YOU actually! Not me. Please. For my boys I'm just like a boy, minus the dude engine!"

"Why don't you want to see this? Actually why don't you want to acknowledge anyone taking a liking to you?

"Because..." and there it was, the long talk I always had in my mind, the one I didn't want to say out loud "Because I don't believe in love okay? I just don't believe in it. It's all a chemical thing, it's connections in your brain telling you "Ouuu, male. You likey male because male makes baby and you likey baby. Make baby baby baby!" It's just chemicals and hormones and drugs. And cultural background telling you that this guy is attractive and this one isn't. If we were in some place in Mauritania we would be hot if we were over weighted because that would mean we'd be wealthy. Here you need to be skinny like a pole dance with two watermelons for boobs. Oh and if your friends think that dude isn't hot well don't you DARE liking him. We're being influence by everyone and everything. I just don't trust myself enough to know that what I will feel really is love. What if what I think I feel is love but it really isn't? Hmm? And... And I expect too much from love alright? I want THAT love, that beautiful heartbreaking thing. I want that feeling that makes you believe that without the guy you would die. I don't want to go out with a guy just to have a boyfriend, I don't WANT a boyfriend. If I meet the guy, then I would go out with him, but for THE guy. Not for the boyfriend deal. And I just don't trust myself that I'll know when I meet HIM. So I just don't want to love."

I took a big breathe when I was done. I had sort of blurred this all out in one breathe. Olympic record anyone? No?

"Put a lot of thought into this?"

"Yep"

Of course I had, because I had already asked myself about Vincent years ago. But asking yourself, if you liked someone, didn't that mean you didn't really like him? If you put it in question didn't that mean it wasn't there?

"You two would just fit well together"

"Wrong. Me and him together, that would be HELL."

And I honestly believed it would be. Constant arguing without a doubt. We were both too stubborn.

"If you say... But please try to stop being so rational about something that just isn't"

"I'm sorry on that one because if you are right and if he really does like me this puts a big lump on our friendship, but I really don't feel any different. If he did... if he did like me I would like to be able to like him too, but I just don't"

"You're weird sometimes you know that right?"

"Yep."

"But I understand your point" she conceded.

I turned my head looking outside at the passing trees on the side of the highway "Thanks. Now can we change subject pretty please?"

After the half hour drive we got to the Archambault and I all but ran to the CD section.

I started into the Anglophone Section, in the A's. This was going to take a while.

I was almost at the end of it, in the Ws, a small pile in my hand when "She's a Genius" by Jet started to play at the radio. I looked around, trying to find Em because we loved that song but I couldn't see her anywhere. She most have been in the books section already so I kept looking for more music.

I started to sing along, silently, just mouthing the words, and when I lift up my eyes from the CD, there was a boy in front of me, well in other side of my row. He was mouthing the lyrics to the song too, skimming through the CDs.

You read it in books, this moment, when the girl looks up and she sees this guy, she sees THE guy. And it's as if there's her whole future right in front of her eyes, she could look down again and pretend like she hadn't seen him, pretend that it was just one of the many strangers passing by in her life. Her whole future writing down in front of her, almost as if she felt it, touched it, and she can just smile at the thought and then look back down and ignore it, look back down and do as if it had never happened.

But she never does.

The boy in front of me, who definitely looked around my age, wasn't the most handsome had I ever seen in my life. He was good looking, of course with his brown hair and his pale blue eyes and his fair skin. His lips were normal, he had strong cheekbones, and there was just something about his face that felt comforting and calm and kind. But he wasn't drop dead gorgeous. I had seen better looking ones. But I simply couldn't explain it. It was like there was no air around me, I couldn't breathe. And I couldn't move, I felt frozen in my spot, like my feet were fixed on the ground, but I also felt weightless. My heart was beating faster and my eyes were opening wider, trying to see the boy better I guess. My palms were getting sweaty and the CDs stacked in my left hand almost slipped on the ground if I hadn't taken them with both.

I must have looked like such a fool, looking at the boy across from me, who was completely oblivious to me, my mouth slightly parted.

Ya right, way to go Azé, that boy is going to kiss you across from the CD row. You don't know him, for all you know he's some bum with every genital disease it is possible to have. Slackedy slack on the hormone pumping stupid BRAIN!

So I did what all the other girls in movies and books didn't do. I dropped my gaze even though it was almost effing painful to do so! Seriously what the phoque? You read that it's painful, you kinda believe it, or you think ya right, as if, but it's true! It's actually effing painful! It's in your stomach, it's almost like your sore from doing a hundred sit-ups, you feel like holding your stomach, or press your palm against your heart because if you don't it surly will rip out of your thorax and through itself at the boy. What a whore, the heart I mean, just throwing itself at him. And does it really think it stands a chance.

Alright I'm not making senses anymore. And I'm being overly dramatic here. I don't KNOW him. It just a stranger like this, that will become some distant memory in a week.

Grow some balls! Well not literally, but... why am I convincing myself again?

I raised my eyes a little and looked back at the boy, trying to be inconspicuous about it.

It's like I needed, actually NEEDED to look at him.

He was still looking at CDs, silently singing the song, a small smile on his lips.

Why did it make me smile? He was a complete stranger for Kurt Cobain's sake! I shouldn't be affected that way! I should be letting my HORMONES affecting me this way! Hadn't I JUST had this conversation with Em?

Still I couldn't help it, I almost wanted to do big wavy hand signs to get his attention, to have him look up, to have him look at me.

Woo-A-oow...

Can anyone say pathetic? Yes? No?

I looked back down, shaking my head slightly, closing my eyes.

Azélie Tremblay, you are going to turn around, go in the book section and forget that boy in front of you.

I nodded to myself, and opened my eyes, and in doing so, looked up and froze.

The boy was looking at me, looking straight into my eyes.

Usually, when you looked over at a stranger, it was short, you look back automatically because it would be rude to keep staring.

But for some reason neither of us looked back. And I felt my cheeks heating up, something that never happened to me and my breathing was hitching up again and I just dropped my gaze because I obviously realized I most have looked like a fool.

Why wasn't the little "Stranger danger" light clicking in my brain? Why wasn't I just going to the books?

I looked up again and he was still looking at me, smiling. And my cheeks most have been bright red and I was probably heating up the shop. So I dropped my gaze again, biting my lip nervously but raised my eyes again.

This little dance went on for a little while. I kept looking up and down, towards him, and I "think" he was doing the same, or he was just getting creeped by my strange behaviour maybe. Nevertheless I felt stupid for behaving like that but I just couldn't help it.

"Buddha answered my prayers!" a voice beamed beside me, making me almost jump on my feet.

Aside from the boy I had kinda forgot about everything around me.

Emma was frowning at me now though, she most have seen something was wrong with my face, but I just gave her a big fake grin so she just went on about he book she had just found ignoring it.

And when I looked back at where the boy had been, he was gone.

© DarknessAndLight, 2010