I ran full pelt from The Rose Garden to the tube, desperately trying to switch my phone on, but it was having none of it. I thought of calling Callie to ask her what I should do, before I remembered I couldn't call her because my battery was dead. I also briefly wondered when I was going to stop being so stupid.

I got back to my flat at quarter to seven and shoved the charger in the little slot, my hands trembling. I waited impatiently while it started up and registered on the network, and waited for any messages to come through.

From: Harry Styles: Wow. You sure moved on quick.

"No no no no no," I breathed. My heart was hammering as I swiped Harry's name and lifted my phone to my ear. "Please answer, please answer, please answer," I muttered as it began its American dialtone. After 4 rings it went to voicemail. I pulled it away from my ear in frustration and called again straight away. It diverted to voicemail again, and did the same on my third attempt.

By now I was almost hyperventilating, and the tears that had been burning at the backs of my eyes since I left The Rose Garden spilled down my cheeks. I couldn't believe he was ignoring my calls. The irony of the situation wasn't lost on me.

I opened up my texts and sat there trying to think how to put everything I wanted to say into a few impersonal characters on a message screen. I finally settled on:

To: Harry Styles: Hey, I just got my phone back, I left it in a bar on Saturday night which is why I didn't call you on Sunday. Sorry for always messing everything up. I really need to speak to you. I miss you. Call me xxxxxx

I decided not to try and explain everything over a text message and hoped instead Harry was not as stubborn as me, and wouldn't take two weeks to get in touch. Turns out I didn't have to wait long at all.

From: Harry Styles: Hey, don't worry about it. Grimmy told me your mate was setting you up with some guy called Adam. He answered your phone when I called you on Sunday. Hope it was a good night. Take care.

I felt my stomach drop to my shoes. Not only because he had jumped to the obvious (and wrong) conclusion, but because he sounded so casual about it. Like he wasn't even bothered. My heart pounded as I swiped the screen and called him, praying to every God in the universe that he would accept the call. He didn't.

I began to cry in frustration as I typed out another text to him.

To: Harry Styles: It's not what you think! I left my phone in the bar. It was about 3am, I was drunk and I got a cab home on my own. Callie wanted to set me up with her boyfriend's mate called Adam, and the barman who found my phone was also called Adam. Please call me back xxxxxx

From: Harry Styles: Wow, both called Adam? That's a coincidence. Sorry I can't, I'm busy.

My hands were shaking. Harry had never been like this with me before - so indifferent, so hard. I didn't know how to take it. 

To: Harry Styles: It is a coincidence, honestly. I wouldn't go back to some random guy's house I don't know xxxxxx

From: Harry Styles: Ha. Wouldn't you?

Oh God. This was awful. I knew he was making the point that I had done exactly that with him only a couple of months ago, but he knew he was the only person I'd ever had a one night stand with. I'd told him enough times.

I tried calling him again but he was still refusing to answer.

To: Harry Styles: Not with anyone else, you know that. You were the exception. I know how this looks but I promise you I went straight home on my own. If you'd just call me I can explain properly. I don't want to do this over text xxxxxx

From: Harry Styles: I told you, I'm busy. It's not nice being ignored, is it? Now I know why you were so quick to think I was doing the dirty on you. You shouldn't judge everyone by your own standards.

I was properly crying now. I could barely see the screen. I called him one final time but wasn't in the slightest surprised when it rang through to his voicemail. My heart pounded as I listened to his answerphone recording and waited for the beep. I took a deep breath and tried to keep my voice steady.

"Hey, Harry. I'm sorry for being a dick on the phone on Saturday night. Everything I said came out wrong, I didn't mean it the way it sounded. I was just trying to be honest with you and I messed it up. I didn't go home with anyone, and I swear I left my phone in a bar called The Rose Garden. You are the only person I've ever had a one night stand with, and even that didn't end up being a one night stand, did it? I don't sleep around. I know what it looks like but I promise you I haven't done the dirty on you. You're all I've thought about since I got back, I..." My voice broke. "I can't even listen to One Direction anymore because I miss you. I can't believe I've just told you that on your voicemail. And you're right, it's not nice being ignored and I'm sorry I gave you the silent treatment for two weeks. You didn't deserve that and I'm sorry I didn't trust you. Please call me. I'm so sorry. Bye."

I kept my phone on loud by my bed all night. Harry didn't call me back.

I was a mess on Tuesday. I barely said a word all day to anyone. My phone was in my desk drawer and I looked at it about twice a minute throughout the day, but I had no texts or calls from Harry. I couldn't bring myself to look on Twitter for fear of seeing pictures of Harry either with a girl or looking like he'd moved on. I still had notifications on for the other boys, and my heart lurched at lunchtime with Liam tweeted about writing new stuff for their new album (Liam and Louis were back in LA). Niall was periodically retweeting stuff, but I refused to check Harry's Twitter, and Louis was unusually quiet.

I tried calling Harry when I got home, just in case he genuinely had been busy yesterday, especially as he was working on the album with the others. He didn't answer, so I sent him another text.

To: Harry Styles: Hey, how's the album coming on? Say hi to Liam and Louis for me. Did you get my voicemail yesterday? I'm really sorry for everything xxxxxxx

I stayed up until gone 1am in case he called or texted, but I woke up at 7 the following morning to a blank phone screen. 

My phone stayed within reach all day Wednesday, and it was nearing 5pm when my Twitter notification sounded and I saw Louis had tweeted. I reached for my phone and read the tweet.

@Louis_Tomlinson: Remember when you were 12 and you used to think those Mac filters for your pictures were cool haha ! Some people still do HA!

I frowned at the screen, not understanding what it was about. It already had 4,000 retweets. I threw my phone on my desk and looked back at my screen. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Sarah staring at me so I looked over at her. She held up her phone behind her computer screen and mouthed "Louis". 

I nodded, and gave her a confused looked and shrugged my shoulders. 

"Zayn," she mouthed.

"What?" I mouthed back. 

"Zayn," she mouthed again. "Naughty Boy." Then she inclined her head slightly towards the door and got up and walked out of the room. I waited a minute before following her and found her in the deserted kitchen.

"What is it?" I asked, pushing open the door.

She seemed unable to contain her excitement. "It's kicking off between Louis and that creepy music producer Naughty Boy - you know, the one Zayn's been working with since he left the band to be a normal 22 year old and live his life out of the spotlight," she said. She was still sore about this. "Look!" she showed me her phone. "They're fighting - about Zayn!"

"What?!" I said in disblief, looking at her phone. I stared at the picture Naughty Boy had tweeted of him and Zayn with the caption 'Replace this', then at Louis' tweet about Mac filters.

"And now Naughty Boy's just tweeted this to Louis - '@Louis_Tomlinson and some people can't even sing.. but who's complaining when there's auto tune eh'. Fucking dickhead," Sarah spat.

"Oh my God," I said, feeling rather defensive of Louis. "Why's he saying stuff like that? Louis doesn't need autotune. That's just bitchy. Poor Louis."

Sarah raised an eyebrow. "Poor Louis? He won't take this lying down. Twitter's already gone into meltdown. He'll be on the warpath before long."

We looked up to see everyone walking past the kitchen towards reception with their bags and jackets.

"Shit, Sarah, it's five o'clock," I said.

"Fancy a drink?" she suggested. "Go onnnnnn," she wheedled when she saw the look on my face. "You need cheering up. And I wanna see how this unfolds on Twitter. Just come with me to Sync for one glass of wine."

I had to admit my curiosity was piqued at this argument between Louis and Naughty Boy. "Alright, just one," I agreed. 

We grabbed our coats and bags, and roped Gary and Nicki into coming with us. We walked up the road and sat outside Sync in the sunshine with a bottle of Prosecco. Within minutes of us sitting down both mine and Sarah's Twitter notifications sounded and we simultaneously grabbed our phones.

@Louis_Tomlinson: @NaughtyBoyMusic Jesus forgot you were such an in demand producer .... How does it feel to be riding on the back of someone else's career ?

"Oooohhhh!" Sarah and I squealed together. Immediately our phones pinged again and we stared at the latest tweet. 

@zaynmalik: @Louis_Tomlinson remember when you had a life and stopped making bitchy comments about mine ?

Sarah stamped her feet and squealed again but I stared at my phone open mouthed. 

"What the fuck?" I said. 

"What, what, what?!" Nicki demanded. "Show me!"

Sarah showed her the tweets while I felt fury boiling up inside me. It was ridiculous to feel so cross about something that didn't concern me, but I couldn't help feeling protective towards Louis after he'd been so supportive of me and Harry. Even though I'd only spent a short amount of time in his company, I felt as though he was sort of a friend. And, I reasoned, Zayn had never even said sorry for pushing his mate into me at that house party and causing me to spill my drink over Harry, so he was clearly rude and inconsiderate. 

Before I could voice my thoughts, another tweet popped up.

@NaughtyBoyMusic: @Louis_Tomlinson Yeah how does it feel mate? You've been doing that for the last five years... I've got Emeli Sande and Sam smith on my CV

"Woah woah woah," Sarah said. "He's getting personal now! But oh my God - #TOMLINSONSLAYSAGAIN is trending on Twitter!"

Gary shook his head in disbelief. "You three are losers," he said. "Why are you even interested?!"

Before any of us could answer, a final tweet came through.

@Louis_Tomlinson: @NaughtyBoyMusic good for you, well done !! I think we've done alright in terms of sales and I've happened to write on most. Keep trying !

"Damn right!" I said. "You tell him, Louis! Fucking cheeky bastard, slating Louis' career like that. Has he looked in the mirror lately?! Dickhead."

Gary, Nicki and Sarah all turned to stare at me.

"Bloody hell, Jess, that's the most we've heard you say since you came back from LA," Nicki remarked.

"Well who does he think he is?!" I exclaimed. "He's just some idiot that no one had even heard of until Zayn started hanging around with him."

"Not exactly true," Gary argued, but I was past listening.

"And as for Zayn," I continued, getting into full swing, "does five years of friendship count for nothing? He shouldn't be publicly siding with that slimeball over Louis."

"Hear, hear," Sarah agreed, scrolling through Twitter. Gary rolled his eyes. "Oooh, the whole fandom is siding with Louis!" she said. "Everyone's telling Zayn off."

"Good!" I said, forcefully. "So they should. I feel like telling him off myself."

"Do it!" Nicki urged.

The glass of Prosecco had gone to my head. "I will!" I said. 

I opened up Twitter and typed a new tweet - @zaynmalik The line is a dot to you #fiveyearsoffriendship #dontforgetwhereyoubelong 

"Will Zayn even understand the Friends quote?" Sarah asked, watching over my shoulder as I sent the tweet.

"He won't even see it!" I scoffed. "I'm only doing it to make myself feel better. I'm going to tweet Louis as well."

"Ooohhh, what are you going to tweet him?!" Sarah asked.

I quickly typed - @Louis_Tomlinson @NaughtyBoyMusic Tommo for the win! #TOMLINSONSLAYSAGAIN This world needs more Tommo sass x

"Ha!" Sarah laughed. "Amen to that." She carried on scrolling through Twitter, reading out funny tweets from other fans while I sipped my Prosecco. "Bloody hell Jess, you've had quite a few retweets," she said after a minute. "The 1D Update accounts are all over it."

I shrugged. "I unfollowed them all. I don't really care."

My phone suddenly pinged with a text and my heart lurched as I saw the name on the screen.

From: Harry Styles: Stop winding Louis up

Shit. I'd forgotten Harry had notifications on for me. Interesting that he hadn't turned them off, though.

To: Harry Styles: I'm not. He doesn't follow me. How are you? xxx

From: Harry Styles: He doesn't need to. 30,000 other people do and it's gone viral. You're making him worse

I felt a bit pissed off at this. I wasn't the only person who was tweeting Louis about his spat with Zayn and the creep. 

To: Harry Styles: I'm not the only person tweeting about it. If you're that concerned about whipping up a media frenzy, tell your 24 million followers to stop tweeting. Don't single me out.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD JESS!" Sarah screamed, knocking over her glass of Prosecco and making Gary jump out of his skin.

"What?!" I said, panicking.

"LOUIS JUST RETWEETED YOU!"

My stomach lurched sickeningly and my heart began to pound. "Shut up, no he didn't."

"He did!" Sarah screamed. "I swear! LOOK!" She turned her phone towards me and I stared at her screen to see my tweet on Louis' Twitter profile.

My phone pinged with a notification and I snatched it up with trembling hands. "Oh my God," I said, hoarsely as I stared at it, not believing my eyes.

"I KNOW!" Sarah squealed, stamping her feet.

"No - you don't... he's just followed me!" I said.

"Fuck off!" Sarah shouted, and even Gary jumped up to look over my shoulder at my phone.

My inner Directioner, who had been hibernating for the last two weeks, was awake and dancing. I felt sick to the stomach at my text exchange with Harry, but I was soaring above the clouds over Louis Tomlinson from One Direction following me on Twitter. It was very confusing.

Before I could begin to make sense of my feelings, my phone pinged again, this time with a DM.

From: @Louis_Tomlinson: Thanks for the support, love. Means a lot x

Omfg. It took everything I had in me to remain calm and not scream. Be cool, be cool, be cool.

To: @Louis_Tomlinson: Always x How's Harry?

His response was immediate.

From: @Louis_Tomlinson: Not good
From: @Louis_Tomlinson: Moody
From: @Louis_Tomlinson: Generally being an arse

I giggled in spite of the situation.

To: @Louis_Tomlinson: I've just been told off for winding you up. Just for the record, I didn't do what he thinks I did.

From: @Louis_Tomlinson: Obviously
From: @Louis_Tomlinson: But he's not the sharpest tool in the box
From: @Louis_Tomlinson: And you did give him serious shit over Swifty

To: @Louis_Tomlinson: Yeah, I was a bit hard on him. But this is different, I haven't done anything!!!!

From: @Louis_Tomlinson: I believe you. He will too, once he calms down.

To: @Louis_Tomlinson: I hope so x

Louis didn't message me back after that. Sarah, Nicki and I spent a good hour glued to Twitter waiting to see if the spat would continue, but it seemed as though Louis had had the last word.

I finally headed home about 7.30 feeling a little bit brighter, mostly because Louis had told me that Harry wasn't fine and dandy, but also because 2 members of One Direction now followed me on Twitter. I didn't text Harry again that night, but after Louis' messages I fully expected some form of contact from Harry imminently. 

I was a little disappointed when I woke up to nothing the following morning. I dragged my feet on my way into work like some sort of neanderthal and flopped into my chair at 8.30 feeling miserable. Gary and Sarah were messing about with their phones taking silly pictures and generally being their usual happy selves, which only served to piss me off more. I scowled as they snapped a selfie by my desk and Gary poked my shoulder. 

"What's up with your face?" he asked.

"Nothing. Don't want to talk about it," I muttered. 

"Is it Harry Styles related?" he asked.

"It always fucking is," I snapped, and he left me alone after that. 

I got a Facebook notification that Sarah had tagged me in a picture and I opened it up on my phone to see she had posted the selfie of her and Gary standing by my desk. I looked extremely fed up in the background, sitting at my desk staring down at my phone. I was just about to untag myself when a message came through. My heart lurched.

From: Harry Styles: Where's all your One Direction stuff gone from your desk?

What the fuck?

I actually looked around the room, half expecting to see him standing there, but of course he wasn't. I turned back to my phone. What the hell was I supposed to reply to that? How did he even know I'd removed all traces of the band?

To: Harry Styles: I took it all down. I didn't need the constant reminder of you when I was trying to get my head around you and Taylor Swift.

From: Harry Styles: There is no me and Taylor Swift

To: Harry Styles: I know x

I didn't get a reply, and I didn't want to push him, but I took it as a tiny step forward. Maybe sense was finally starting to prevail and he was beginning to believe that I hadn't gone off with another guy. 

I sat with Sarah in the kitchen at lunchtime.

"Have there been any sightings of Harry on Twitter?" I asked her casually as I ate my chicken wrap.

She shook her head. "Nothing at all," she said. "It's like he's gone to ground since you left LA. The 1D update accounts are all asking where he is. He's not tweeted and he hasn't been pictured out anywhere. It's weird isn't it."

"Mmmm," I mumbled. I wasn't sure whether to take this as a good thing or a bad thing. He was either holed up at home, or cleverly avoiding the paps, or had somehow managed to stop them printing pictures of him. The last scenario was the least likely, as he was always a hot topic, in every sense of the word. And even if he'd got some kind of injunction, he couldn't stop fans snapping pictures and sharing them on Twitter. The second scenario was almost as unlikely. I knew from my own limited experience that the paps were unavoidable, especially where Harry was concerned. Which only left the first scenario - he had turned into a hermit.

The question was, why?

~~~~~~~~~~

I decided to get out of London for the weekend to visit my mum and dad. I couldn't cope with staring at the same four walls of my flat for two days, and I couldn't face faking a smile and hanging out with my friends. I drove up to Cambridge on Friday night and spent Saturday hanging out on the sofa with Maddie watching chick flicks and eating junk food.

I woke up late on Sunday to Maddie bounding into my room excitedly. "Jess - wake up! You have to see this!" She thrust her phone in my face. "The 1D fandom are trying to get more recognition for the FOUR album, and for Louis. They're campaigning for No Control to be released as a single!"

I sat up and took her phone off her, and squinted at the screen, reading the article she was showing me.

"They want 17th May to be No Control Day - the same day as the BBMAs!" Maddie continued.

"BBMAs?" I repeated, confused.

She rolled her eyes. "Billboard Music Awards. They're big in the US. Get with it."

"Sorry," I muttered, sarcastically. 

"This is INCREDIBLE!" Maddie shrieked, making me jump. "We have to get on board with this. YOU have to get on board with this! You have like a gazillion followers on Twitter. What a great opportunity to promote it!"

"I'm not doing any promotions," I said. "I'll support it because I love Louis and the rest of the band, but I'm not going to start campaigning for anything and drawing attention to myself."

"At least retweet it or something!" Maddie urged. 

We spent the day on the sofa again, mostly scrolling through Maddie's Twitter and finding out exactly what this Project No Control was all about. My soft spot for Louis was growing as I realised this would do wonders for his confidence, and also would stick two fingers up at that pathetic idiot Naughty Boy for ridiculing Louis' vocal abilities. It never ceased to amaze me just how much the fandom came together to support the boys in times of need.

I retweeted all the Project No Control information, and as we sat down to eat my mum's roast dinner I quickly sent a tweet.

@Louis_Tomlinson @Real_Liam_Payne recognition for this song is long overdue #WeWantNoControlAsASingle #ProjectNoControl xxx

"Put that gadget away at the dinner table please, Jessica," my dad scolded, and I rolled my eyes while he wasn't looking.

I half hoped Harry would text me after my tweet about Project No Control, but nothing came through, and by the time I got back to London that night I was feeling miserable again. I got into bed and scrolled through Twitter, but as I had unfollowed all the 1D updates my news feed was pretty boring, and I turned my attention instead to my message conversations with Harry. I went through every single one, grinning like a fool as I remembered the thrill and excitement of it all. It seemed like so much time had elapsed since I first spilled my drink on him, but in reality it was just over two months. It felt I'd known him for years, which when I thought about it, I sort of had. He just hadn't known me.

I stared at my phone in my hand for a while, before tentatively typing a text to him.

To: Harry Styles: Hey you. How are things? x

There. That was breezy, wasn't it? That didn't scream I miss you, I love you, I'm sorry I keep messing up, please forgive me! 

I almost dropped my phone when a reply came through pretty much straight away.

From: Harry Styles: Good thanks. You? x

Oh God. Finally. A kiss at the end of the message. And a question that required a response. I could only hope that by 'Good thanks' he actually meant 'Miserable and missing you.' 

To: Harry Styles: Alright. Been to my parents' for the weekend. Maddie is going crazy over Project No Control. What have you been up to? x

From: Harry Styles: Filming a sketch with James Corden for The Late Late Show. We're on it next Thursday x

To: Harry Styles: Really? That's awesome. How is he? x

From: Harry Styles: He's good. He asked after you x

Oh God. Why was he saying that? Was he trying to make me cry?

To: Harry Styles: I miss you x

I didn't care if I wasn't being cool. My heart was breaking. It took about five minutes before a reply came through. It was the longest five minutes of my life.

From: Harry Styles: I miss you too x

I literally sighed with relief. I hesitated for a minute, then swiped my finger across his name. He answered on the second ring.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hi," I said back. I paused. "I'm sorry."

"Me too," he said. 

"Last Saturday night... it wasn't what you think," I began.

"I know," he sighed. 

"Do you, though?" I said. "Do you believe me?"

"Yeah I do," he muttered. "Sorry for being an arse."

"It's fine," I said. "I'm sorry I gave you such a hard time over Taylor Swift." I gritted my teeth as I said her name. As much as I believed Harry, I couldn't help hating her guts.

"It's ok," he said, but I could still detect a slight tone in his voice. I decided to let it go. 

"Have you listened to any One Direction yet?" he asked.

"No," I said. "I haven't really felt like it to be honest."

"Oh ok." 

Oh God this was awkward. What had happened to the light-hearted, fun conversations? The flirting, the teasing, the audible grins?

"When are you next home?" I asked.

"You mean back in the UK?" he said. "Not until June. The European leg of the tour starts on the fifth in Cardiff."

Oh. He wasn't coming back for another four weeks? "Yeah I know, that's the one I've got tickets for," I mumbled.

"Oh yeah," he said. There was a short silence. "We're writing some good stuff for the new album."

"That's great," I said, aware I was sounding forced. "How are Louis and Liam? And Niall?"

There was another pause. "They're all fine. You'd know. Didn't Louis follow you on Twitter?"

"Yeah, he did," I said. "He messaged me to say thanks for the support over the Zayn thing."

This conversation was so awkward it was making me want to cry.

"He got into trouble over that," Harry said. "He shouldn't have got so wound up." He sounded accusatory.

"I don't blame him," I defended. "That slimeball Naughty Boy got personal. All Louis did was take the piss out of his Mac filters. I'd have done the same, it was a stupid picture. And Zayn shouldn't have said what he said either."

"You don't know anything about it," Harry snapped.

"I know it was out of order, what they both said to Louis," I snapped back. "I didn't see you jumping in to defend him. You were too busy blaming me for the entire fandom winding him up."

"You were making him worse!" Harry said, his voice rising. "He was practically skipping around the room when he saw your tweet! You could have done so much damage!"

"To what? Your ego?!" I yelled. "Are you jealous or something because I tweeted your mate and not you?!"

"Don't be ridiculous," he scoffed.

"Millions of fans tweeted Louis," I ranted. "I didn't even think he'd see it! I only did it to make myself feel better because Zayn and Naughty Boy had really pissed me off."

"Yes and millions of fans saw your tweet!" Harry shouted. "You know everyone thinks you're my girlfriend, so by association people think you're expressing opinions of the band! You could have caused chaos! You could have damaged our reputation!"

"Is that all you care about?!" I practically screamed. "Your precious reputation?! You need a fucking reality check, Harry! Sorry if people thinking I'm your girlfriend is causing you problems! I'll set them straight, shall I? Or maybe send a tweet disclaimer? Opinions expressed here are solely my own and do not reflect the views or opinions of One Direction or any of its affiliates!" I wasn't even certain I was making sense, but I was past caring.

"Stop being dramatic," he said.

"Don't tell me how to behave!" I roared. "I'm not some pathetic doe-eyed sap who jumps when you click your fingers! You should know that by now!"

"Oh yes, I forgot, you're far more interested in hanging out with the rest of One Direction, aren't you," he sniped.

"No, actually," I replied. "You were the one I was interested in hanging out with. But now I can see you're just a childish, moody, arrogant arsehole. I told you from the start I don't do clingy. I'm not the sort of girl who's going to hang on your every word, and sit around waiting for you to call, and you don't know how to deal with that do you? You're used to getting what you want, when you want. Well sorry to disappoint you Harry. You're not calling the shots anymore. I'm sick of feeling like shit because of you and your string of conquests. I promise I'll never hurt you, you said. Trust me, you said. Well, balls to that. I stuck up for your friend the other day, along with millions of others, when two idiots were publicly laying into him, and all you can do is moan about fucking collateral damage. You need to sort out your priorities."

"First of all, when have I ever called the shots in this relationship?" Harry spluttered. "You've had me wrapped around your little finger from day one. Second of all, my string of conquests as you so eloquently put it are nothing to do with this argument. This is about you and your complete naivety about the consequences of posting shit on social media. And lastly, Louis is just fine, thanks. He didn't need you sticking up for him. He's a big boy and he can take care of himself!"

"Well that's not what he said to me!" I retorted. "He said 'Thanks for the support, love. Means a lot.' Means a lot. I think you just didn't like it because you've got some weird complex about me being a fan and liking Louis. Well just for the record, I'm crazy about you, Harry, and no one else has ever come close. So next time you want to use me as a scapegoat for your own insecurities just you remember that."

"That... that is just ridiculous," he stammered. "I haven't got a complex about anything."

"And as for being wrapped around my little finger, that's a load of bull. It's the other way round! I've accepted your explanations for all these womanising rumours, despite all the evidence backing them up. I told you I was scared of getting hurt and it just keeps happening! No doubt there will be another one next week that will have a 'perfectly innocent explanation' and I'll be expected to just have faith in what you tell me. Funny how you never publicly put your side of the story out there, isn't it! No, because it's far easier for you just to ignore it and leave everyone else, i.e. me, to deal with it. Why acknowledge the rumours when it might affect the band's reputation?!"

"Have you finished?!" Harry bellowed, making me jump and cutting off my rant. "Why are you bringing those rumours up again?! I thought we'd moved past all that and you believed me? You can't just throw it in my face everytime you're feeling hormonal and want to pick a fight!"

"We're not getting anywhere," I sighed. "We're just going round in circles."

"Finally, something we agree on."

There was silence from both of us, apart from our rapid breathing.

"I think I should go," Harry said, his voice devoid of any emotion. "The others are in the next room. We need finish filming this sketch."

"You're in the middle of filming?"

"We've barely started," he said flatly.

"Fine. Say hi from me."

He laughed shortly. "Yeah. Will do."

"Bye," I muttered.

"Yeah bye," he muttered back, and he was gone. I pulled my phone away from my ear and stared down at it numbly, wondering what the hell had just happened. I saw a DM notification and I opened it up.

From: @Louis_Tomlinson: For the record, I don't "skip"

I couldn't bring myself to reply. I didn't have the energy to think about anything after that row with Harry. I couldn't even cry. I set my alarm and turned the light out, and lay in the darkness staring up at the ceiling.

Where had it all gone wrong? I couldn't blame the argument. The whole conversation had been awkward from the start. It felt like we were strangers.

I thought back to the fun we'd had in LA, and our last night together where I'd felt so in love with him I would literally have done anything for him. I didn't know how to get those feelings back. I could feel every single mile stretching between us, and every single minute that would have to pass before I would see him again. That was if we even would see each other again. If that conversation was anything to go by it was looking unlikely.

I sighed and closed my eyes. I still hadn't told him how I felt about him, not properly. I'd said I was crazy about him but it had been lost amongst jealous jibes and cross words. If this was the beginning of the end, it would be the biggest regret of my life that I never admitted I was in love with Harry Styles to the one person who needed to hear it.

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Hi :) I've entered this book into the Wattys2015 so if you are enjoying reading, please please vote!!! And votes on previous chapters would be amazing also.... :)

If you want to message me and ask me anything at all, please feel free! I absolutely love feedback and questions. Inbox messages are easier, as other messages get lost on my profile, and I promise to answer as quickly as I can!! (I work full time though so I can't talk during UK office hours.)

Thank you for reading :) xxx Oh, and follow me on Twitter if you're bored @scooby_snacks94 :)