NO.1 DADDIES WON 2ND PLACE! WOHOOO! THANK YOU GUYS! ILYSM 1437! 

__________________________________________________ 

Chapter 15- Sober

Five months later,......

(Zayn's P.O.V)

I have been sober for nearly two weeks now.

After what I did to Liam and Louis, I felt so disgusted with myself. I wanted nothing more than to hold them in my arms and apologize; but I knew that it was not that simple. Both Liam and Louis were passed out on the floor when I left them. And Niall,.....Niall was crying, crying for me. My baby was confused and scared; he was terrified of me. I didn't know what to do, so I just left, found the nearest bar and got drunk, again. My mind was in a terrible state, and I could feel the numbing pain in my heart, literally breaking apart. What has gotten into me? What have I become?

I promised myself, I promised Liam, I promised Niall, Louis and Harry; I promised them that I would never hurt them nor let anything hurt them. But I fucked it all up. All those promises was a big fat lie coming out out of my worthless mouth. Everyday, every single fucking day, I would hear Niall's beautiful laughs, feel Liam's soft lips on mine, see Harry's cheeky smile, sounds of Louis singing with his euphoric voice. I realize that I don't deserve them, I don't deserve happiness, I don't deserve their love, I don't deserve to be loved but, I NEED them. Their my life, my air, my everything. Liam is the reason I'm still a human and Niall is the reason for the smile on my face. I'm dysfunctional without them.

“Are you ready Zee?” Ed poked his ginger haired head through the door. Ed was kind enough to pull me out of the bar even though I punched him in the gut twice. He lets me stay at his place to sober up but that didn't last long; I drank each and every bottle of beer in his apartment and I would sneak out when Ed's asleep to got to the nearest bar.

Ed had to struggle with keeping me sober, and after a week, I finally told him what happened. I even receive a harsh slap in the face for that. He told me to man up and tell Liam everything, but I was too scared. Scared of rejection, scared of everything. I hid myself in Ed's apartment, no bothering about work but after a month, I decided that I should leave Ed's apartment, much to his displease. I stayed at a vacation cabin Liam and I bought beside a lake. We only used once, which was during our honeymoon. Liam didn't want to have a fancy honeymoon overseas, he just want to spend some private time alone with me at the cabin where we first exchange our ''I love you''-s. It was the most magical 7 days of my life. Liam and I promised that someday we would bring the three little angels And now, after five months, I finally ready. I was ready to face Liam and my three little angels; and begged them for forgiveness. I know that it won't be easy, but I have to try.

“Y-Yeah, I'll be out in a sec,” I replied hoarsely. Every single night for five months I had been crying. I don't even know how is it possible that I still have any tears left.

***

The drive to my house was silence and awkward. Well, silence on my part that is. Ed kept blabbering happily about me reuniting with Liam, and him playing with his nieces that he haven't seen in five months. I was a nervous wreck though, I mean how could I not be? They might not even open the door for me. I don't care if had to beg for their forgiveness, I will do anything for them to accept me.

Finally, after a three hour drive, we arrived at my house. But there was something wrong with it; Louis' bicycle wasn't on the front lawn like it should be, the kiddie pool wasn't there, and there is a huge sign that said “For Sale”. My throat felt like there were sands in them, and I felt like throwing up.

“What the....?” I heard Ed mutter. He parked the car on the driveway and I immediately got out of the car, making a beeline towards the front door. I burst through the front door without even knocking but the I was met with the sight that makes my heart shatter.

The house was empty.

Literally empty; the furniture, the pictures, my family,.....all gone. My knees gave out causing me to kneel down on the hardwood floor with tears were rapidly flowing down my cheeks. They left the house? Liam moved away with the kids? But where? I....I need them! They can't just leave me!

“Mate,...they're not here. Lets look for them somewhere else 'kay?” Ed puts his hands on my shoulder.

“N-no, th-they might c-come back,” I sobbed “I-I need t-to be here when they c-come back..,”

“Mate,...they're not-”

“No! Don't you fucking say it! They're coming back! They have to!” I helplessly sobbed.

“I hate seeing you like this Zee,” Ed mumbled “Come on, they might be at you parents house. Lets go yeah?”

Ed had to help me up because I felt physically drained. Liam left. Liam took the kids and left me here all alone. This is all my fault; I left them in the first place. Ed drove us to my parents' house which is not far away from mine. That was the whole purpose of them buying us the house; so that they'll always be close to me. Mum and Dad always wanted many grandchildren running around their backyard. So, whenever Niall, Harry and Louis visits them, they would spoil those three little angels rotten. It made Liam worries sometimes, he does not want Niall, Harry and Louis to be a spoiled brat, he wanted them to be grateful little kids, but whenever he saw how happy they are to visit my parents, he'll let it slide. After a 10-minutes drive, we arrived at my parents house, and luckily, it looks like it was still inhabited. Once Ed parked the car on the driveway, I got out and head for the front door, much like what I did when I was at my house. I knocked on the front door relentlessly until a familiar lady opened the door with a look of annoyance etched on her face.

“What- Zayn?!” Blood drained from her face when she saw me. “What,..what are you doing here?”

“Mum, where's Liam? Where are my kids?!” I asks her desperately, as tears began to form in my eyes again.

“You shouldn't be here Zayn, if your father sees you-”

“Mum! Where are my kids!?”

“Wait a sec,” She hold up her finger at me then went back inside the house. A few seconds later, she came out with a brown A4 envelope in her hands.

“Take this,” She shoved the brown envelope into my hands “And leave, if your father sees you, I'm not sure I can hold him back. Just leave Zayn. Everything you need to know is in that envelope. Take care, Zayn. And goodbye,”

And with that, she closes the door, leaving me dumbfounded on the doorstep.

Slowly, I opened the brown envelope and pulled out the white A4 paper. The black bold letters came into view and when I read them, I felt like vomiting; it a divorce letter. Liam divorced me. My hands shook vigorously as I read the paper over and over again; he'd hire a lawyer to divorce without me having to sign the papers. I flipped through the papers and my eyes landed on another set of papers.

Three warrants. Three Order Of Protection warrants. Liam,....did this? I have three OOP warrants in my hands against Niall James Javvad Payne-Malik, Harold Edward Payne-Mailk, and Louis William Payne-Malik. I could not believe Liam did this. How could he have the heart to put a restraining order on me against my own sons? How-How can I see them after this? I have to stay 500 feet away from my three little angels! As I read through the papers, my knees once again gave out, and the last thing I heard before I passed out,...

Was Niall's beautiful laughter.

***

(Liam's P.O.V)

“Niall put down that hammer! Where did you even get that?!”

“No Harry, you do not color on the wall. Even if your drawings are pretty!”

“Louis William, get out of the oven right now!”

Being a single father is hard. Especially if your not the strict one; Zayn is the strict one between us, and these three little angles listens to Zayn more. But that is not the case now; Zayn is out of the picture and we're moving on. A new house, a new job and a new attitude. Well, the last one, I'm not so sure; I still cry every night, thinking about Zayn. Where is he? Why didn't he come back for us? Is he eating okay? Is he sleeping okay? It's been three months and I haven't heard anything about him. When I said move on, I haven't moved on a hundred percent; I couldn't and wouldn't forget about Zayn. I do still believe that he's the love of my life, my other half. I guess fate had to step in and split our roads. Slowly, but surely, I'm learning to live without him, with El's help and my three little angels. On the first month, they kept asking when is Papa gonna come back, especially Niall, who would cry every night and ends up sleeping with me, but after three months, Louis and Harry stopped asking about Zayn, but Niall didn't. He kept asking for Zayn ever night and at some point, he would have terrible nightmares. If this thing continues, I might need to get some professional help for Niall. He might seem like a happy bubbly toddler during the day, but at night, he's usually grumpy, silent and distant. He even hates bath-time now, which used to be his favorite time of the day. I guess it must have remind him of Zayn. God, how I wish I could help Niall. Even though Louis is the eldest, Niall is my- out first child. He stole our hearts at the orphanage.

It's a normal lazy Saturday afternoon for us; spending the time inside playing around the house. It's also Juice Day for the angels, which means they can have their favorite juice for any meal of the day. The downside of Juice Day is that, they were really juiced up by the amount of sugar in their drinks. Hyperactive Niall, Louis and Harry will make you feel like you're actually taking care of ten kids instead of three. Especially when you're handling them alone.

“Daddy, more juice!!” Niall waves his sippy cup in front of my face. I was sitting on the couch, catching my breath after pulling Louis out of the oven.

“Say the magic word babe,”

“Daddy, more juice pleaseeee,” Niall giggled, dragging the word ''please''. I kissed him on the nose and took his sippy cup. I walked to the kitchen with Niall behind me.

“What do you want babe? Apple juice?”

“Nu-uh. Ki-wi,” Niall pronounced it slowly. Kiwi and apple are his favorites while Harry likes mango and lychee, Louis' fave are berries and pineapples.

“You got it babe,” I nodded, pulling out the kiwi juice from the fridge. Niall was waiting patiently for me to fill up his sippy cup; putting both hands behind his back, swaying back and forth. He was really adorable. After I filled up his sippy cup, and handed it to Niall, he took it happily and ran back to the living room, screaming “thank you Daddy”. I was about to walk out of the kitchen when something small attached itself to my legs. I looked down and say Hazzy, smiling cheekily at me.

“Daddy! Daddy! I koala,” To prove his point, he starts chewing on my pants, while giggling. I bent down and detached the curly ''koala'' from my leg, lifting him up. I nuzzled my nose with his causing him to giggle more.

“You're a very curly koala baby. Want more juice?” I asked him and Harry answered with a vigorous nod. “Where's your sippy cup?”

“Uhhh,...Uhhh,...Umm,” Harry looks around the kitchen, trying to find his sippy cup. It has become a habit for him whenever someone asks him a question that he can't answer, he will put his index finger on his bottom lip, pulling it down.

“Go find them, and I'll give you more juice yeah?” I kissed him and placed him on the floor. Immediately, he run out of the kitchen with his chubby legs, screaming for Louis to find his sippy cup. I heard my phone rang from the living room and I immediately ran to answer it. If it was El, I'm gonna force her to come here and entertain the kids; that way, I could have some rest. To my disappointment, it wasn't El, instead, it was Zayn's mother Tricia. She visits us all time and even is she doesn't call, she can always give us a surprise visit, like she always do. Why would she call now? I pressed the 'answer' button and placed the phone on my ears.

“Hello? Tricia?”

“Liam,” Her voice was a tad bit shaky. “How are you?”

“I'm fine Tricia, why are you calling? Are you coming over?” I asked her politely. Even though Zayn and I are now divorced, she is still the grandmother of my children. That will never change.

“No. No, that is not why I'm calling,” She answers nervously.

“Is everything alright? Did something happen to-”

“It's Zayn, Liam,” She caught me off. At the mention of Zayn's name, all the air in my lungs was forced out.

“He's looking for you,”  

______________________________________________________________

I'm evil, I know...... Rest assured, things will be explained more on the next chapter! Including Zayn's sickness :D

VOTE! 

COMMENT! 

FOLLOW! 

P.S The prologue for my new story My Boss My Hero (Ziall) is up. Mind checking them out? 

ILYSM 1437