NIRUPAMA

(Some Secrets May Better Remain Secrets Forever)

'I cannot bear this', 'I want to pluck my eyes out' only these two sentences were the clues which the late girl Nirupama left in writing one on a wall and one in a book quite unintentionally and involuntarily to know about the reason for her committing suicide. Her father Ranganath, detective Smaran and his niece Menaka along with Nirupama's friend Sukanya pretty well understood that Nirupama did not want the said secret to be known to anyone else. But since her father Ranganath hell bent upon knowing about the said secret, detective Smaran and his niece Menaka ruthlessly investigated the matter only to unearth the said ghastly, shocking and astounding secret which the dead girl terribly wished to keep only with her in her grave forever.

x x x x x

"I see." Niranjan nodded his head. "You heard Nirupama saying so. Why you are thinking it was not a dream?"

"It was so real, that is why I am not thinking that it was a dream."

"You were not sleeping then? Was it all happened while you were awaken?

"No. I was sleeping at that time." Sukanya said irritatingly.

"You were sleeping? That means it all happened in your dream. How do you say it all real?"

"I was sleeping alright but as soon as Nirupama started saying something I woke up. I did not sleep for a long time afterwards."

"Can you tell me what Nirupama said to you at that time?"

Sukanya told him what Nirupama said to her.

"You still remember exactly what she has said to you at that time?" Niranjan said.

"Yes." Sukanya said.

Niranjan smiled again. "It was not your dream then. At the same time it was not really happened either."

"I cannot understand what you are saying." Sukanya confused.

"You have imagined all that while you were awaken in the middle of night."

"No. It is even more preposterous! How do I imagine something like that without knowing I am imagining."

"It may be surprising but it is possible. You are so much obsessed with thoughts about Nirupama. So you have started imagining like this about her. Don't feel surprise! Sometimes we do imagine like that and think it is really happening."

"You are right. I can say I am obsessed with thinking about Nirupama. I just cannot get rid of that thinking. Mostly it is all useless thinking. Once there is no chance that Nirupama comes again, there is no use of thinking her so all the time."

"I agree with you on that." Niranjan nodded his head.

"But still I cannot agree I have just imagined all that. It is preposterous!"

"I already said. Sometimes it happens like that." Niranjan said.

"Alright. I agree with what you have said." Menaka nodded her head. "But even more big problem to me is I just cannot stop thinking about her. What should I do with these obsessive thoughts? Can I stop them by force?"

"If you try to do it like that with them they do become even more strong. We should never try to stop our thoughts by force?"

"What should I have to do then?" she once again irritated.

"Before you know about how to deal with thoughts, it is important that you should know the type of thoughts. Thoughts are two types. Intentional thoughts and unintentional thoughts. Intentional thoughts are those which you do intentionally. You shall have control over the intentional thoughts. There is no necessity to worry much about them. The next are unintentional thoughts. These unintentional thoughts do come all the time. You need not do them at all. Whatever you may be doing, they just pop into your mind all the time. These unintentional thoughts consist pleasant and unpleasant thoughts also.

The main problem is, whenever thoughts unintentionally pop-up into you, you think that you are doing those thoughts intentionally. Then you become irritated. You are doing something important and want to do that with all the concentration but these unintentional thoughts trouble you coming from nowhere. Sometimes you stop and try to clear these unintentional thoughts but they do become even fierce and their strength would become even more. Whenever you try to clear the unintentional thoughts and remove them from your mind, it happens like this."

"You are absolutely right. It is interesting to hear. I never have known thoughts as intentional and unintentional." Sukanya beamed on hearing that.

"Yes. They are like that. And there is a solution also for this. Just don't bother about these unintentional thoughts. Gently remind yourself that you have no business with these unintentional thoughts. Treat these unintentional thoughts just like you treat the outside disturbances. Once you stop worrying about these unintentional thoughts and stop fighting with them, they do weaken. Either they do become disappear or even they are there, they don't bother you anymore.

Sometimes there may be some useful tips also are available in these unintentional thoughts. So, don't try to run away from those thoughts and whenever you find some useful thing in them note it somewhere.

It is not going to be possible just in one day or one week to learn to deal with unintentional thoughts in this way. At the same time it is very difficult to find the difference between intentional and unintentional thoughts. But practice wins every time. If you are persistent you sure do get control over unintentional thoughts." Niranjan concluded.

"But I have a problem with imagination also. I am imagining quite irritative things sometimes. How this imagination stops?" Sukanya worried.

"Your imagination depends on your thinking. Once your thinking comes under control of you, your imagination also stops. Don't think too much about these thoughts or imagination. Just let them come and go."

"What should I do next time I start imagining like this?"

"Follow the same technique that you do follow for your unintentional thinking. Just remind yourself that it is all your unintentional imagination and not real. If the imagination persists, let it go, don't try to stop it. Just observe the imagination as it is happening. Soon this imagination weakens and you stop doing that."

"It is really very interesting to know about it in this way."

"Our mind itself is a very interesting thing. So whatever relates to our minds also would be interesting."

Sukanya nodded her head. There was silence between them both for sometime.

"It is very sad that Nirupama ended her life so. I think it is even more hard on you. You both are that much good friends, you both came here always together."

"I still could not digest what happened indeed. I never have expected something like this."

"No one can expect something like this."

"We both have shared lot many things between ourselves. We did not conceal anything from each other. Why Niru did not prefer to share this something with me I cannot understand."

"It may be of such magnitude. She said everything almost to me too. She did not even refer remotely either that something bothering her that much." Niranjan said.

They talked some more time on that.

"I am feeling really very happy coming and talking with you like this. Now I go and come again to you." Sukanya said and got off from the chair she sat.

"I really love it." Niranjan said. "I am having a feeling that Niru came to me by your coming to me here."

***

"That Niranjan is really a very interesting personality." Sukanya said to Menaka. Early morning at 9 of that day Menaka came to Sukanya's home.

"Really? I did not talk with him until now and I am planning to have a session with that Niranjan."Menaka said.

"You sure do love talking with him." Sukanya said. She explained what happened between Niranjan and herself.

"You really felt like that in the middle of night? Why it happened so?" Menaka asked her.

"I don't know the reason about it at all. It appeared quite real to me. To discuss about it particularly I went to him. Nirupama and I quite often visited on him many a time in the past. Everytime he was interesting and entertaining. I might have told you that he was the reason why Nirupama chose psychology in her post graduation."

"I think you mentioned that to me." Menaka said. "I now come to the point again. Are you really thinking that you have heard the voice of Nirupama?"

"Not now. Not after I have a discussion with Niranjan." Menaka said. "As he has said I possibly imagined all that." She said.

"But I too have had an experience recently." Menaka said and explained to her what she experienced in Nirupama's room.

"Your experience is even more livid and real than mine." Sukanya said. "What you are feeling about it? Are you thinking really Nirupama is there?"

"My uncle said just what Niranjan has said to you." Menaka laughed. "No I am also not thinking that it had really taken place. It was all also just my imagination. I am compelled to think like that"

"What else it could be? Nirupama died. How she would be in existence now?" Sukanya sighed heavily.

"Is there no chance that her soul is present?"

"First tell me. Do you believe in the souls or devils, etc.?" Sukanya asked her.

"No. I don't believe in any of them like that." Menaka replied to her.

"Then how do you expect her soul or something like that present anywhere at all?" Sukanya said.

"You are right." Menaka nodded her head. "Oh, I almost forgot. How I have forgotten to say this important thing to tell you until now." Then she explained to her what has been found in the library book.

Sukanya sat straight in the chair. "Interesting! Is it is so?" she asked surprisingly.

"Yes. Hundred percent it is so. It is really becoming very difficult to understand why she had left messages like that." Menaka said.

"It was not a voluntary act of her at all." Sukanya said. "She did that quite unintentionally, I can say." She became thoughtful.

"You are right." Menaka said.

"I am certainly right. By her behavior it can be understood that she did not want to tell about that main thing to anyone else. She particularly kept it from everyone else even from close and intimate people also. Then why did she leave any clue at all about that?"

"I must agree with you on this." Menaka nodded her head.

"But why she wanted to pluck her eyes out? What really made her to wish like that?" thick frowns gathered on the forehead of Sukanya.

"I too cannot understand anything about it. So you also have no idea about why she has written like that?" Menaka asked.

"Certainly not. I am not having even a vaguest idea why she has written it like that." Nodding her head in negation Sukanya said. "What all I can say is she has got perfect and beautiful eyes. She never needed to wear even eye glasses also."

"One interesting thing here. I just forgot to tell you." Then Menaka said to her what Nirmala said when she talked about Nirupama's eyes with her

"It is even more disturbing. It does mean only one thing. That Nirmala certainly can say why Nirumpama wrote like that." Sukanya frowned.

"I think you are right." Menaka nodded her head.

"Can we get any information about it from Nirmala?" Sukanya knitted her brows together.

"I am not thinking like that. When I talked about it Nirmala appeared shocked! Saying like that was just automatic from her at that time. I am afraid that she may become more agitated and shocked if I talk any more about Nirupama's eyes with her or mentioned what she has written in that book."

"Then don't do so." Sukanya said.

After that both the friends talked some more time together.

***

"It is very nice that you have come to our house again." Seeing Smaran in their house Nirmala said.

"Seeing you again I am also feeling very happy." Smaran said. "Anyhow how my niece here is? Is she troubling you people for anything? She is a naughty girl."

"Troubling? What you are saying? She is really a very nice girl. I love her a lot." Nirmala said.

"Then it is so that there is no problem at all."

"No problem whatsoever" Nirmala laughed and said again "Your friend just went out. He may come home at any moment. Please make comfortable yourself. I do bring some coffee to you."

"That is absolutely not necessary. Where is Menaka now?"

"She went to that Sukanya's home. That girl has become a great friend to her."

"No surprise. That Sukanya also just like this Menaka."

Then without bothering with the protests of Smaran that he did not want any coffee like thing then, Nirmala went into the kitchen.

Suddenly Ranganath and Niranjan entered into the house.

(..........to be continued)

(I hope you enjoyed it so far. Please don't forget to rate and review it. I update the next chapter as early as possible.)

#investigation #detection #psychology #hypnosis#hypnotism #love #romance #romantic #suspense #thriller #sentiment #family#suicide #psychology #hypnosis #self-hypnosis #psychiatry #psychiatrist