Nico had never kissed Will.

He desperately wanted to; He wanted to taste Will's chapped lips, to fill Will's nose delicately press against his own, to lean into Will's warmth while the air around them stayed fresh as they stood out in the open.

He wanted so badly to let a kiss be how he tells Will how much he cares, loves him, how much he values his boyfriend.

But... Nico was afraid. Which he found odd. Demigods only lived so long, you'd think they go right in for it, right? But it only made Nico shudder away more. He felt anxious, like he was procrastinating the most important thing in the world to him!

He kind of was.

Nico was thinking about this as he laid in his cabin, at around midnight with the sky darkly toned. He had his arms folded under his head, and he stared up at Cabin 13's ceiling. His cabin was plain, as to be expected from him, he likes simplistic living. It's very vacant, the only things being a small door, to the left from his bed that was in the right corner of the door, for the bathroom; besides that, a small dresser next to his bed, with nothing but an old-timey lamp, a photo of his family and another of Will, and a pen with paper for any thoughts he decided to write down; that just left him and his one bed, a plain wooden frame with white sheets, a black comforter and a yellow blanket gifted by Will.

Nico looked at the yellow blanket, holding it up over him with his fingers, and he couldn't help but think how close of a colour it was to Will's hair.

Nico wasn't the time to love people. Well, actually, he's quite a lover, but he wasn't the type to think about them 24/7. He knew he had them, and that's all that mattered. But Will... He's scared of losing him. He's scared of not being able to move on once he does. He understands loss... Will isn't someone he wanted to add to that pile--But not only that, Will was one of the few people Nico would do anything, at any cost, to avoid losing.

So why was he so afraid to kiss Will? Was it self-sabotage? He wasn't sure.

All he knew is that when Will knocked on his door, he couldn't help but smile, but also was afraid. Not afraid of Will, but afraid of what Nico had decided he would do the next time he saw Nico: Kiss him, effortlessly.

A high expectation he honestly wasn't sure he could meet.