Haphephobia -
A morbid fear of being touched

NIALL POV:
I was put together with four other boys. Harry Styles, Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson, and Zayn Malik.

I also have haphephobia. A fear of being touched. Whenever someone touches me I scream and cry. I don't know why I act this day but I do and I hate it. Everyone I know, all my family and friends, are used to it by now. But, what will my bandmates think of this? I guess I'm finding out tomorrow when we move in together.

The Next Day
NIALL POV:
I'm outside the home, trying to remember everyone's name. Harry, Liam, Zayn, and... wait, Harry Liam Louis, and... Zayn!!! Ok, I have their names. Wait, I need their appearances then they'll say their name right? Why did I do that? Oh, whatever.

I knock on the door and it immediately opens.

"You must be Niall!"

I nodded.

"Come sit on the couch with us. We're waiting for Harry then we'll all introduce ourselves a little more."

I nodded but then looked at the couch. There were five cushions, perfect for five people. But, the boys were so close to each other they were... touching. I decided to sit on the floor.

"Not a couch guy?" someone asked.

"Uh, well, I-"

"It's alright, you can sit there if you want."

I smiled at him and nodded.

A few minutes later, there was another knock and someone opened the door.

"Harry, right?"

He nodded and stepped inside.

"Why is he sitting on the floor?" Harry asked, pointing to me.

My eyes turned worried, my breathing got heavy.

"U-um, well..."

"It's alright, just teasing," he said deciding to also sit on the floor, next to me.

The other boys chuckled.

"Ok, well I'm Liam," the one who opened the door started, "Why don't we just say our name, where we're from, and then we'll move on. After everyone's done we'll get into some conversation. Ok?"

"How long have you been planning this, teacher," Harry joked.

We all laughed, including Liam.

"Oh, and by the way I'm from Wolverhampton, West Midlands, England."

"So detailed," one of the other boys said.

We laughed again.

"Ok, ok, who's next."

Harry raised his hand.

"I'm Harry Styles from Redditch, Worcestershire, England. Figured I'll get as detailed as him. And, guess I'll pass it on to him," he said pointing to me.

"Oh, I'm Niall Horan from Mullingar, Westmeath, Ireland," I quickly said.

I pointed to Zayn.

"Um, I'm Zayn Malik from Bradford. That's all. Now, Louis."

"Louis Tomlinson, Doncaster."

"Ok, now anything that will affect your life like medications, hearing difficulties, mental stuff."

The way he called it mental 'stuff' made me not want to talk about it. Or my OCD. Or my claustrophobia. Or my colorblindness. I could speak about being leftie though.

"I'm left handed. I write leftie, and I kick leftie in soccer, but I golf right, and play guitar right."

"Cool. I have... anxiety and depression," Zayn said. (Not Very Accurate)

"What type of anxiety?" I blurted out, "I-I mean if you want to answer... um... Anyone know where the bathroom is?"

Liam looked very confused but told me the directions.

Except, when he was pointing, he put his hand on my shoulder. As soon as he did that, I screamed and started crying and ran away.

"What the hell?" someone said.

"Did anyone see him crying when he left?" I heard Liam ask.

"Yea," all of them said.

"Maybe you were taking too long and he wet himself," Louis said.

"Let's check on him," Harry said.

I was in the bathroom leaning against the wall, on the floor, crying with my head in my hands.

I heard footsteps coming and the door opened. I couldn't figure out the lock so I left it open earlier, not expecting this to happen.

"Niall? What just happened?"

"Uh, I-I... miss my family..?"

"Ok, it's only been a few days but you do you."

"Wanna hug?"

"NO!!! I-I mean no thanks."

The boys looked really confused. God, why I am so awkward.

"Um, how does the lock on the door work..?"

"Oh, you just push this button, and it locks," he said pushing the button on the door handle.

I mentally face palmed myself.

"Ok, thanks," I said walking back.

This time, without really realizing it, I sat on the couch. On the second seat. Liam and Harry were about to sit down next to me and as soon as I noticed that, I got up. I figured by now they probably thought I was weird and maybe even rude.

"Ok, I-I have something to confess..." I started.

The boys were now all sitting, and I was the only one standing.

I took a deep breath.

"I have... colorblindness-"

"That's not that bad," Louis said.

"Shh, let him finish," Harry said.

Then, I felt like I couldn't tell them.

"Um... can I tell you another time?"

"Nonsense, it can't be that bad."

Now I had to say it.

"I also have... OCD and... claustrophobia, and haphephobia," I finally finished.

"OCD? Oh that's fine. I could always use a tidy person," Louis said.

I wanted to punch him in the face after he said that.

"THAT'S NOT WHAT OCD IS!!!!"

Louis looked shocked after I screamed.

"Sorry, why don't you look it up if you don't know what it is," I said, sounding a little more rude than I meant.

"Ok, what's haphephobia though," Harry asked.

"Um, you can look it up..?"

"Nah, just tell us. You know what, I have a fear of... spoons," Liam said, sounding a little embarrassed, and even sad.

I wanted to hug him so bad but I knew I couldn't so I just nodded.

"It's a fear of being... touched."

"Touched? Ok, I thought spoons was stupid, but that's even worse," Louis said.

Why is Louis so mean?

"Look, I'm touching you," Louis said.

He poked me. Once, twice, three times.

My body broke down. I started crying and without really realizing it, punched Louis in the face.

My body went straight into a panic attack.

I had quick, small breaths and I was shaking and crying. I curled into a ball on the floor. At home, my family all knew how to calm me in this situation, but I knew the boys wouldn't know how.

After a few seconds of watching me suffer, they moved onto helping Louis. Liam brought him an ice pack but told him he deserved the punch.

"You deserved that punch Louis. But, we'll give you a second chance because we know you can't, and don't, always act like this."

"I'm sorry Niall, Liam's right, I deserved that. I'm just not used to being without my family, even for a few days."

"Can you turn on Friends?"

"Huh?"

"TV."

"Oh," Harry said, turning it on.

I didn't really like the show but it distracted me from everything else going on around me.

After a few minutes, I was calm.

"Just wondering... will that always work to help you calm down in a panic attack situation?" Zayn asked.

I nodded.

"Cool. Let's get on with our day now, yea?"

I nodded.

Now, the boys all help me with all my mental (and physical) health whenever I need it.

1224 Words