seventeen.
Mars watched Zaine run ahead on the grassy path of the park, his little legs kicking excitedly as he tried to catch up with Shark. The big, gray dog ran in playful circles, making sure to stay just a step ahead of the boy, his tongue lolling out as he enjoyed the crisp autumn air. Mars trailed behind, her hands stuffed into her hoodie pockets, feeling a strange mix of emotions that she hadn't had time to process.
It had been a whirlwind morning—picking up Zaine, explaining to him who she was, and now figuring out what the hell to do next. She still couldn't believe it. One day, she was Mars Tosin: actor, musician, and lowkey recluse. The next? Mars Tosin: a whole-ass parent.
But she hadn't wanted to overwhelm Zaine, not right away. So, she'd decided to take it slow. A day at the park with Shark seemed like a good place to start.
Mars sat down on a park bench, watching as Zaine collapsed into the grass, giggling as Shark flopped beside him. The little boy scratched the dog's head, and Shark leaned into it, enjoying the attention. Mars smiled despite the knot of uncertainty tightening in her chest. This kid was going to change everything.
Zaine looked up from the dog suddenly, his bright eyes filled with curiosity. "Am I going to be living with you?" he asked, his small voice filled with both hope and a hint of worry. "I'm gonna miss Gran Gran and Pop Pop."
Mars exhaled slowly, not wanting to make any promises she couldn't keep. "If you want to," she answered carefully. "I know we just met, so it's okay if you need time to figure things out."
Zaine tilted his head thoughtfully, like he was considering it. "Gran Gran said it's okay. She said I can be with you if I want to. But I miss them a little already."
Mars felt a tug in her chest. "I get that, buddy. And you know what? We can visit them whenever you want."
That seemed to make Zaine feel better, and he gave her a small, satisfied smile. "Okay."
Mars leaned back on the bench, watching Shark roll in the grass beside Zaine. She wanted to ask him a million questions, to fill in the gaps of the years she'd missed. But she didn't want to rush anything, so she started with something simple.
"Tell me about your mama," she asked gently.
Zaine's face lit up instantly. "She was the best!" he exclaimed, sitting up straighter as if he were about to tell the most exciting story in the world.
Mars smiled at the enthusiasm in his voice. "Yeah? What made her the best?"
"She made pancakes with chocolate chips and whipped cream! And she let me sleep in her bed when I had bad dreams." Zaine's voice softened a little, his eyes clouding over with sadness for a moment. "I miss her a lot."
Mars swallowed the lump forming in her throat. "I bet you do, kiddo."
He looked down at the grass, picking at a blade absentmindedly. "I asked her why I don't have a daddy once," he said quietly. "And she told me my daddy is out there being a superstar."
Mars let out a small laugh, though it was tinged with sadness. "A superstar, huh? Crazy."
Zaine smiled at her, clearly proud of the idea. "Are you really a superstar, Mars?"
Mars shrugged, trying not to let the weight of her fame feel too overwhelming for the little boy. "Something like that."
Zaine's eyes widened with excitement. "Does that mean you can be on TV whenever you want?"
Mars chuckled. "I guess so. But I think hanging out with you is way more fun than being on TV."
Zaine beamed at the compliment, and Mars felt her heart soften in a way she hadn't expected. She still had no idea how to be a parent, but in that moment, she realized she didn't have to figure it all out at once. They just had to take it one step at a time.
She glanced over at Zaine again, curious about him in a way she hadn't been earlier. "How old are you, Zaine?" she asked.
"I'm this many!" Zaine held up four fingers proudly. "My birthday is in November, and I'll turn five!"
"Five, huh?" Mars grinned. "That's a pretty big deal. What do you want for your birthday?"
Zaine thought about it for a second, his face scrunching up in concentration. "I want a big dinosaur toy. Like... a T-Rex! And a cake with lots of sprinkles."
Mars chuckled. "I think we can make that happen."
Zaine's eyes sparkled with excitement. "Really?"
"Really," Mars confirmed. "We'll throw the best birthday party ever. I'll even get you a T-Rex if that's what you want."
Zaine gave a little cheer and clapped his hands together, clearly delighted by the idea. Then he turned the tables on Mars, his curious gaze locking onto her. "How old are you, Mars?"
"I'm twenty-four," she replied with a small smile.
Zaine's eyes went wide. "That's a big number!"
Mars laughed, the sound light and genuine. "Yeah, I guess it is."
"Do you know everything?" Zaine asked seriously, as if twenty-four was the age where people became all-knowing.
Mars shook her head. "No not really, kiddo. I'm trying to figure things out, just like you."
Zaine seemed satisfied with that answer, and he leaned against Shark's side, petting the dog's head. "I like you, Mars," he said softly.
Mars felt a warmth spread through her chest. "I like you too, Zaine."
For a while, they sat there together—Mars, Zaine, and Shark—all basking in the calm of the park. It was a rare moment of peace, a chance to breathe and enjoy the present without worrying about what came next.
But in the back of Mars's mind, she knew there were still questions that needed answers. How was she going to explain this to Billie? What would people say when they found out Mars had a kid? And how would Billie handle the news?
She glanced down at Zaine, who was now lying on his back in the grass, giggling as Shark licked his face. Whatever happened next, Mars knew one thing for sure: she wasn't going to walk away from this kid.
Zaine was hers, and she was going to do everything in her power to be there for him. Whether that meant learning how to braid hair, reading bedtime stories, or just being the person he could count on, she was all in.
And no matter what the future held, she wasn't going to let anything—or anyone—change that.
As the sun dipped lower in the sky, casting a warm glow over the park, Mars stood up and brushed off her pants. "Come on, buddy," she said, holding out her hand. "Let's go grab some food. I know a place with the best fries ever."
Zaine scrambled to his feet and took her hand without hesitation. "Can Shark come too?"
Mars grinned. "Of course. Shark goes everywhere with me."
Hand in hand, they walked out of the park, Shark trotting happily beside them. And for the first time all day, Mars felt like maybe—just maybe—she could handle whatever life threw her way.
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