Alex's POV

I take a deep breath as I stop in our driveway. I stop the time on my watch and slowly walk up to the front door.

It was a beautiful morning for running and I'm glad I decided to go now because it looks like it might get really hot today.

As I open the front door I am met with silence. When I left, Stephanie was just about to go drop of the kids at daycare and Maya was busy in the kitchen. So at the moment I'm not entirely sure where everyone is.

I walk to the kitchen and open up the fridge to get myself some water. I reach out for my iPad to look into some updates on my patients at the hospital. They should be done with the morning rounds which means the statistics would be logged in by now.

I lean over the kitchen counter and read through all my files, making sure I don't miss anything.

I know they're all doing fine but I wouldn't be able to carry on with my day unless I make sure.

I hear footsteps coming towards the kitchen and a few seconds later I feel two hands wrap around my waist.

"No baby, I'm sweating" I slightly chuckle but also feel bad for one of my wives who decided to hug me.

"I don't really care" Stephanie says in a low voice and I feel her stand up behind me. "It won't be the first time having your sweat on me"

I just laugh and shake my head at her answer as I continue with the last few pages.

However, my attention is drawn away from my iPad when her hands rub ever so softly over my ass. She lifts up my shirt, probably to get a better view and I let out a flustered laugh.

I feel her fingertips running down my ass and slip between my legs. My stomach does a few twists and I hold my breath as she runs a single finger over my pussy.

I assume the position I'm standing in and the tight fitting leggings gives her a clear outline of everything.

The thin material also makes it much easier to feel every inch of me.

I stand frozen in place as she plays around and my legs involuntarily spread a bit wider for her.

I don't even need to look back because I know there is a big smirk on her face. They both know how to control me and I'm not even ashamed.

I love the soft, teasing touches.

But only for a little bit.

Then I want more.

I feel my legs buckle a bit at her touch and the concentration towards my patient files is nonexistent.

"Oooh baby" I groan a bit and rest my head down on the counter. "I have to shower first" I say in a low voice hoping she isn't mad at me turning her down.

"Okay, I know. I'm sorry" she softly chuckles and her hands move back up to my sides.

"I didn't think you would be back yet." I smile and put the iPad down on the counter before I turn around. "How did drop off at daycare go?"

She doesn't answer my question right away and I see her eyes dipping down my body before she wraps her arms around my lower back. "I just threw them inside and ran."

"Hmm sure" I laugh and even though I'm still a little conscious about my sweaty body, I wrap my arms around her neck.

She gives me a smile because she knows I don't believe her. We both know dropping the twins off takes at least ten to fifteen minutes.

It's really hard to say goodbye.

"I dropped them off a little earlier because I wanted to have more time with my wives."

"Why didn't you just tell me, I wouldn't have gone for a run?" I slightly frown.

"The architects will only be here in about two hours." She slightly shrugs. "And now we have an excuse to shower with you."

"You don't need an excuse" I laugh. "I love showering with you."

"I know, but I'm talking about a long shower" she smirks and I bite my bottom lip with an excited smile on my face.

We tried having sex in the shower last night because we all love it but a soft cry came through the baby monitor and Jonah was in need of attention.

We kinda expected that to happen because he didn't have a great day and his afternoon nap was a little too short.

Since the twins were born, our shower time has changed a bit. We can't really enjoy our showers together like we always did because we need to be prepared if something like that happens.

And it happens more often than not.

So the last two years, our showers are quick but we definitely sneak in a few touches. We try to hold it together until we know they are both down for the night.

Then we continue in bed.

I feel her hands reach around for my ass and she gives it a soft but noticeable squeeze.

"Where is Maya?" I whisper with a slightly aroused tone and by the look in her eye, she definitely picked up on it.

"She's upstairs" she smiles and her touches on my ass get a little harder as she pushes my body tight against hers.

"Then let's go" I whisper and give her a quick teasing tongue kiss before I pull back and step away from her.

The walk up the stairs was quick but her hands never left my body. She wanted to kiss my neck but I kept pulling away because I didn't want her to get sweat all over her face.

We finally get to our room and she opens the door for me with a big smile on her face and for some reason I find myself blushing a bit.

"Maya honey!" Stephanie calls out into the bedroom and I see Maya coming out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her body.

"She already took a shower" I slightly laugh but enjoy Stephanie's hands roaming my body.

"No I didn't" Maya smiles, ripping the towel off and throwing it into the bathroom. "I was just about to get in" she shrugs with a slight chuckle.

I smile in amusement because I can see a few droplets on her skin which means she is definitely lying but my eyes are locked on her naked figure in front of us.

"She is ready for us baby" Stephanie whispers behind me and runs her hands over my stomach, up my body to squeeze my breasts.

"I'm also ready" I whisper back and Maya bites her bottom lip in a sly smirk before she walks back into the bathroom.

"After you my darling" Stephanie whispers in my ear and her hand reaches down between my legs, pressing right on my clit.

"Ah fuck" I moan out uncontrollably and stumble a bit forward.

She knows exactly how to turn me on and grabbing me unexpectedly like that is definitely one way.

We get to the bathroom and piece by piece our clothes drop to the floor. There were some struggles with my leggings but eventually everything came off.

"Can I just quickly wash myself?" I ask as their hands start with innocent touches here and there.

"You have three minutes" Maya commands and the tone of her voice makes me a little weak.

We get into the shower and as I get the water ready for us, I watch her pin Stephanie against the shower wall and start kissing her neck. Maya's hand immediately massages her one breast and my heart starts beating a little faster.

"I really don't mind just watching you" I whisper in a breathless voice and feel my mouth go a little dry.

They both just smile before they share a passionate kiss and Maya has her hand between Stephanie's legs, gently rubbing over her pussy.

I know she is just waiting for the right moment, getting Stephanie wet enough before she goes inside her.

And I am definitely waiting for that as well.

"Baby please fuck me" Stephanie moans out and I can see the frustration in her body.

My stomach does a few twists at her pleadings and I feel myself getting more aroused by the second.

Stephanie turns her head to me and smiles."You have two minutes lef-ahhhh fuck"

Maya cuts her off with two fingers sliding inside her and I feel my own pussy aching to be touched.

"Oooh fuck baby" Stephanie moans out with her head tilted back against the wall.

Maya moves her mouth down to Stephanie's nipple and I subconsciously bring my hand up to play with my own nipple.

I know what her tongue feels like when she flicks it like that and just like Stephanie now, I usually can't suppress my vocal reactions.

I have managed to wash half of my body but the sounds coming from Stephanie has me captivated.

I have no control at this moment and all I can think about is what they'll do to me once I'm done washing myself.

I love it how gentle they can be but I also don't mind it a little rough.

It's only been a few months since I've been fully satisfied with how my body looks and I can tell they really appreciate me being my old self.

It took me a long time but they were patient with me and I will forever be grateful for that.

......

"Alex"

I hear a soft whisper and a gentle touch on my shoulder. I slowly open my eyes and Maya gives me a sympathetic smile. "I'm sorry to wake you up baby."

"It's okay" I smile and cup the one side of her face. "What's wrong?"

"Karen and Steven are on their way over." She says with a slight sigh and my face falls.

"I'm sorry honey" she adds.

"It's okay" I say taking a deep breath.

I don't mind people coming over but it takes so much effort for me to get myself ready. Maya and Stephanie feel bad every time they tell me but we can't tell them no, everyone wants to meet the twins.

But I just fed them one hour ago and I actually had a good nap, it was just way too short. I am exhausted today and definitely not in the mood for company right now. I just want to lay in bed for a bit.

Just before I fell asleep, Stephanie and Maya were here with me. We were watching a movie and they had the twins in their arms.

That's all I needed.

I just wanted my whole family with me.

They waited with me until I fell asleep and then they probably went downstairs with the twins. I know Stephanie had some work to do. But I have no doubt that Maya was right there on the couch watching them.

"Brandon is really excited to meet his cousins" Maya says with a slight smile and I know it's her way to make me feel better.

"I know" I groan and roll over to her side. I wrap my arm around her and fake cry into her stomach.

"One hour, I promise" she whispers and kisses my head.

"Okay" I sigh and slowly sit up on the bed. "I have to take a shower though."

"Okay, let's go" she smiles and grabs my hand to pull me up.

I slightly groan from my aching muscles but I slowly walk with her to the bathroom.

It's only been two weeks since the twins were born, but my whole body is definitely still in shock and I haven't slept much either. Unfortunately for me, they wake up on different times during the night. I probably slept two hours all together last night.

But I wasn't awake, alone. My two lovely wives were there with me every time they made a sound. They took turns though, which I totally understand. They are running up and down the whole day, making me food or coffee. They change the diapers most of the time, just to let me rest for a bit.

I'm really grateful for them in times like that.

"Baby can you please get me some underwear from the closet?"

"Of course" she smiles and walks out.

I find myself in front of the mirror and I sigh and the sight. I really don't look good, my eyes are baggy and my hair is a mess. I look really terrible right now and it makes me depressed.

I reach down to pull my shirt over my head but as soon as I hear Maya walking back to the bathroom, I quickly cover my body.

"Are these fine babe?" She asks, holding them up.

"Perfect, thank you" I smile but I can see the confusion on her face.

"What are you doing?" She sighs.

"You know what I'm doing" I also sigh and take the underwear from her. "Can you please not-"

"Alex" she cuts me of in a gentle tone. "You don't ever have to feel ashamed of your body. You are absolutely beautiful."

"I don't feel beautiful right now" I whisper and look down at the ground. "Do you mind just waiting downstairs? I'll be down in a few minutes."

Just stares at me for a few seconds but then gives me a soft 'okay' before she leaves the bathroom.

I lean back against the bathroom counter with a loud sigh. I feel like an absolutely asshole because I know she means well and that she loves me no matter what but I don't have any self-confidence in my body right now.

My breasts are huge and actually painful, my stomach still has a little bump but it's hanging like a sack. I have stretch marks over my thighs and stomach which makes me want to cry a bit.

I know that it is normal and I've spoken to so many new moms about how beautiful it is to have these marks after pregnancy.

I had two beautiful babies inside me and I would do it all over again if it means to feel that much joy. I would go through all that pain again to bring them into this world.

But as of now I don't feel beautiful and sexy. I am tired and ashamed of my body. I just need a little more time to accept it.

One of these days I'll be back to my normal diet and exercise routine. I'm definitely getting back into shape as soon as I can.

I quickly hop in the shower and wash away the long night and day I had. I can feel my breasts starting to tingle a bit which means it's almost time to feed the twins again.

I'm still amazed about how connected I am towards them. I get a feeling in my body before they even make a sound.

It's so strange, but also so amazing.

I quickly put on some comfortable but also presentable clothing and quickly do my hair before I walk out the door.

As I come down the stairs I can hear Karen and Steven's voices in the kitchen. I put a fake smile on my face and walk around the corner.

"Hey you guys" I smile and look over at the couch where Karen holds one of our babies and Steven has the other one.

"Auntie Alex!" Brandon is the first to run towards me for a big hug.

I don't have the strength to pick him up for a hug but I hold him tight against my legs. He has gotten so big over the last two years but he will always be my little Brandon.

"Your babies are so small" he says with a shy laughter.

"Yes they are small huh?" I smile down at him. "But they'll get bigger, just like you"

"Yeah" he chuckles and runs back to Steven to look at them.

"Alex, they are absolutely gorgeous" Karen says with the biggest smile on her face as she stands up.

She reaches out her one arm for a hug and my heart beats a little faster. I would appreciate it if she could hold my child with two hands.

"Congratulations" she whispers as I give her a side hug.

"Thank you" I smile and give Steven a hug as well. "Thank you for coming by"

I look down at our babies and they are still asleep which makes me smile. They look so peaceful and they definitely look warm enough with their fleece blankets wrapped around each of them.

I glance up at my wives across the kitchen and Stephanie just smiles but Maya doesn't look very happy with me. Karen and Steven won't pick up on it but I know my wife.

She is upset with me and now I have to fix it.

I slowly make my way to the other side of the counter and quickly give Stephanie a kiss before I reach out to Maya.

I wrap my arm around her waist and she wraps her one arm around my neck but she is definitely not showing me the love I normally get.

"I'm sorry baby" I whisper so nobody else can hear me.

I'm one hundred percent sure Stephanie already knows what happened but this isn't exactly a conversation I want to have in front of Karen and Steven.

"Why don't we go sit in the living room?" Stephanie breaks the silence behind me and I feel her hand on my back.

I glance back and watch the three of them disappear into the living room. I lift my head to look at Maya and she takes a deep breath without saying anything.

"I'm really sorry for kicking you out" I whisper and run my hands over her hips.

"I'm not going to lie, that wasn't fun for me."

"I know" I sigh and cover my face as I feel the tears start building up in my eyes. "I'm sorry-"

I'm cut off by either Riley or Jonah crying. I close my eyes and take a deep breath to gather myself. Any moment someone is going to bring me a baby but I wish I could've just finish this conversation with Maya.

But it's time for them to drink so I'm not really surprised by their cries.

"Do you want to come with me?" I ask in a soft tone, hoping my invitation would soften her frustration towards me.

"Yeah" she nods her head with a small smile and I reach out to grab her hand.

I lead her out the kitchen and is met with Karen walking over to me. "There is mommy" she smiles down at Jonah.

"Hi my big boy" I smile as I take him from her arms. "I know you are hungry" I whisper and kiss his head.

I reach out to Maya's hand again and she holds it tight as we start walking. "We'll be in my office babe" I look at Stephanie and she gives me a quick wink and an air kiss.

We get to my office and Maya closes the door behind us.

From the day we knew I was pregnant we talked about if I wanted to breastfeed or not. Maya and Stephanie made it clear that if I were to, nobody else can see me do it. I can't even put a blanket over my body.

I've seen a lot of women breastfeed before and I don't think much of it but they are very clear on that.

So whenever we have people over and I have to breastfeed, I will always excuse myself. One of them always go with me if both of the twins need to drink.

But right now I want Maya to be here with me.

I take a seat on the couch and Maya helps me take the one side of my shirt off. "Thank you baby" I whisper as I sit back against the couch.

I pull the strap down and place Jonah over my nipple to start drinking.

I feel a little shy about being exposed like this in front of them as well but I can't take this away from my wives. These are their children too and of course they would want to see them drinking from me. It's a precious moment to witness and I can see how much it means to them every time.

I reach out my hand to softly lay on her thigh and she looks up at me. "I just need a little more time" I say in whisper. "I appreciate what you are trying to do, I really do." I smile. "But it's not something you can help me with."

"Why?"

"Because even when you say I'm beautiful or sexy or hot or whatever" I slightly chuckle. "I still don't feel like that."

"Alex" she slightly groans and grabs my hand. "You-"

"Baby" I cut her off and I feel the tears building up in my eyes again. "I know you love me and I love you more than ever but this is something I can't explain to you." I breathe out the last few words with a few tears falling down my cheek. "I need to see that beauty myself, I need to feel it on my own but it's going to take a while."

She shakes her head and looks down at our hands in her lap. "I wish you could see yourself through my eyes."

"Believe me, I wish that too" I smile.

"I'm serious baby" she says in a sincere voice "You are absolutely beautiful in every way."

"Thank you sweetheart" I smile and feel more tears running down my cheeks.

She sits a bit closer to me and reaches up to wipe the tears off my face. "I love you Alex"

"I love you too" I breathe out and close my eyes as the tears start to fall with a bit more emotion.

I lay my head down on her shoulder and softly cry into her neck. She wraps her arm around me and pulls me closer to her.

She softly lays her hand over mine which is holding Jonah over my breast and I feel a few kisses on my head.

Lately I have scheduled my crying sessions for when Maya and Stephanie aren't home or when they are busy with something.

Sometimes I would even cry in the middle of the night.

Everything is just a bit overwhelming and I am unbelievably tired. All my emotions are still going crazy and I hate that.

I just want to feel normal again.

But now, laying in the arms of my wife makes me feel so safe. It feels good to cry with her holding me and it feels even better that I had this conversation with her.

They need to know why I feel like this and why I need a little more time to accept my body as is it now.

.....