"Thank you for coming, I seriously appreciate it" Jeonghun said sincerely on the other side of the phone. He wasn't one to talk much about feelings, but you knew he was at his absolute limit when he opened up.

"It's alright, Jeonghunie" you replied sweetly before rethinking your next few words for the umpteenth time. "I was wondering if you'd mind me bringing my boyfriend along" you muttered unsure.

Your brother had told you about all the things your mother had been talking about anticipating your visit and you were fed up with her. No matter what, you were never good enough.

She had all these expectations about how you should look and you were sure she'd be disappointed you hadn't dropped any weight, hadn't hung out with more people, weren't friends with everyone at work, didn't have the widest circle of friends.

Maybe, just maybe, if she saw someone did actually want you for you, she'd get off your back and leave you alone. So after Jimin asking day and night if he could come along, you had finally given in. Shutting your mom up and being comforted by him? Two birds with one stone.

"Oh, sure. Look at you, I didn't know you were seeing someone. I'm happy for you!" he answered enthusiastically. In your family, your brother was the only one who always truly was happy for you and not for your personal achievements.

"Yeah, just tell mom I'm coming with Jimin, she'll know" you said bitterly. If she was shaken to the core by the revelation that Jimin was actually a man, she had to shut up for sure.

"You've told mom about him?" Jeonghun questioned you, it would be unlike you to tell your mom more than she needed to know.

"Not exactly. She doesn't know we are together. Or that he is a man."

"Oh" he didn't know what to say, not being sure of whether this was a good idea to begin with, but he opted to not give his opinion on it. Knowing you, you'd surely thought about it carefully.

Friday night finally came and you'd taken the day off to pack and get ready. It probably had been a bad idea, since you'd had all that time to think about what was going on this weekend. You gave up trying to eat when you lost count of how many times you were sick.

Maybe it's for the best, mom won't see you bloated at least.

You were in a really dark place right now, you knew you had gained weight eating more frequently and she was bound to comment on it. The last few days that had gone down the drain though and you were secretly pleased even if your body was paying for it.

Hobi and Jimin were going to pick you up after work. They had sent a message to your group chat about an hour and a half ago saying that they were on their way to the dorms and were going to grab their bags and shower before heading to your place.

The doorbell rang and after letting them know you were coming, you grabbed your carry-on and made your way to the elevator. Your legs were shaking and you couldn't tell if it was the anxiety or the lack of calories anymore. It was impossible to hide, surely it would be noticeable and you were nervous.

As the doors slid open, you looked up and met Jimin's wide smile from the distance as he waited on the other side of the main door. You couldn't help but smile back, in the end you were glad he was coming with you and would stay by your side so you didn't have to face your mother alone.

Your dad was going to be there too, he wasn't necessarily a bad man, but he was just never there for you. He had no clue about anything that went on when he was not around, you barely knew him and he barely knew you.

"Hey aegi" Jimin said pecking you and hugging you happily. He was clearly thrilled about you having let him and his hyung join you on your trip. Now you'd be well taken care of, he'd make sure.

He furrowed his eyebrows when he felt you shaking in his arms, you were freezing. Pressing a gentle kiss to your cheek, he rubbed your back with one hand for a little bit trying to warm you up a bit.

"You haven't eaten, have you?" he asked sounding sad and your heart ached.

"I keep getting sick, I'm sorry" you said pulling back to look at him with glassy eyes. It hurt to disappoint him, he'd be upset if he knew the kind of thoughts that you were having these days.

"It's okay, I'm here now" Jimin said and hugged you tighter. He knew he was comforting to you, just not how much. You squeezed his waist and buried your face in his chest, needing his warmth, his love, his embrace.

"If Hobi asks..." you began and he looked down at you seriously, "I get motion sickness."

Jimin pressed his lips together and nodded. He hated lying to his hyung, but he could understand why you didn't want to have to explain yourself. You were already mortified about him having been around you being sick and now Hobi would most likely witness it too.

As you got in the car, you greeted Hoseok with a small smile and he grinned brightly at you through the rear-view mirror as he pulled out and drove off. You had over two and a half hours ahead and he hoped to get to your destination before midnight.

"Hob-ah" you called him after a while with a small voice. Jimin squeezed your hand which he held tightly on his lap since you got in the car.

"Yep?" Hobi answered glancing at the mirror and saw you looked pale. He kept looking ahead and then at you concerned until you talked.

"Please, pull over" you blurted out and he immediately steered to a side of the road and turned on his hazard lights to warn drivers.

The moment the car came to a stop, you yanked your arm out of Jimin's hold and darted out of the vehicle. You ran as fast as your wobbly legs would allow to make sure the guys couldn't hear or see you and fell on your hands and knees and heaved on the grass.

This was so incredibly humiliating, even if you were with friends. You felt so pathetic, why did things have to affect you so much your body just couldn't take it? If only you didn't care, if only you didn't mind. But how could you when people constantly pointed it all out?

Jimin watched from afar with furrowed eyebrows to make sure you were okay. He would be there in a heartbeat if he didn't know better, but you didn't want him to see you in that state so he refrained.

"Is she okay?" Hobi asked with a little involuntary pout turning around to look at his dongsaeng.

"Yes, it's just motion sickness" the younger one mumbled.

"Shouldn't you go check on her?" Hobi waved his hand urging him to get out of the car, but he didn't move.

"She doesn't like me being there when she's sick" his voice was monotone and he hoped his hyung couldn't see the pained expression on his face now that it was dark out.

You came back shortly after and Jimin handed you a water bottle, he had brought a few just in case. So you'd stay hydrated. You nodded to thank him and he saw your hands shake on your lap before he took one and stroked the back of it with his thumb.

When you looked up at him he was biting hard on his lip and looking away at the dark silhouettes passing by the window. He was hurting because of you and it was heartbreaking. Why did he want this? Why did he want you? You wanted to curl up in a ball and cry, but now was not the time.

"Do you want some crackers?" Hobi offered softly holding the packet over his shoulder.

"No, thank you, Hob-ah" you rejected them immediately and you could see out of the corner of your eye how Jimin ran his hand down his face in frustration. He was trying so hard to bite his tongue and not comment on this and make it worse.

Sighing, you looked down at your lap filled with shame and guilt. Your eyes watered, but you quickly wiped the tears that threatened to fall and sniffled. Your boyfriend turned to you with a little pout when he heard and held your head to kiss it sweetly in a comforting gesture.

You thought of taking something to knock yourself out during the road trip, but ultimately decided against it. The effect would last longer than the drive and your mom was going to have enough to talk about without you looking puffy after being woken up.

Hobi had to pull over three more times before you made it to Gwangju past midnight because of the delays you caused. By the time you found yourself in front of your childhood home, you were afraid you were going to pass out from how light-headed you felt.

"You guys have a good time, I'll text you to pick you up on Sunday evening" Hobi said as you two got out of the car. You laid your back on the side of it with your face in your hands, trying to stop everything from moving while Jimin took your bags out of the trunk.

He threw his duffel bag over his shoulder, pulled your carry-on with him and safely wrapped his other arm around your waist to help you feel more stable on your feet.

"Eat something before bed!" Hobi yelled from the car as he waved at you and you nodded halfheartedly looking over your shoulder.

"I'm not ready, Jiminie" you said in a broken voice as you approached the house feeling your stomach turn. He pulled you closer to him protectively and kissed your head once more.

"I'm here with you, aegi. I won't let them hurt you" Jimin said resolutely and you smiled weakly. It would be nice for him to actually be able to do that, but he couldn't fight the intangible. Your parents had never laid a hand on you, they had never insulted you or treated you unkindly.

They were just as toxic as you were.

You stood on the porch sweating as you waited for someone to open the door. Would it be your mom? Your dad? Your brother? It was late, maybe you'd get lucky, it would be Jeonghun and you wouldn't have to see your parents until the morning.

Much to your dismay, your mother had stayed up late excited to welcome you and your best friend. She was smiling widely.

"Good evening, girls. How was the drive?" she asked before the door was wide open, seeing you first and then looking to your left expecting to see your girl friend.

Your mom's face dropped and she brought a hand to her chest looking at your boyfriend with wide eyes. Whatever she was going to say slipped her mind in that moment.

Jimin thought you had told your parents he was coming and was just as shocked as her. They stared at each other for what seemed like forever to you. Your heart started racing in your chest at the sight.

Please let this weekend go well, you begged to whatever higher power was listening, if any.

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