It's hard-fought, but we win the World Cup. It feels as though the stars have aligned for it to have happened, because a weakened team with no previous trophies seemingly conquered everyone, despite our camp self-destructing.

Daniel kisses my head before I can escape his celebration, and I find it easy to run off with Salma to swim in the confetti decorating the pitch.

"I can't believe it," I shout in Salma's ear above the noise. We watch England crumple in front of us, but it does not matter much to my teammate. For me, it might be a little awkward next season. "After all that has happened."

Salma throws herself on top of me with a squeal. "We get a gold medal!"

"Another medal," I giggle. We have both come off an extremely successful season, too. "Now I will have a good choice of clubs."

"They are going to fight over you."

I am awarded the Young Player of the Tournament trophy.

Jenni is awarded a sexual assault claim.

━━━━━━━

The party is slightly soured but the girls are adamant to not let the RFEF ruin anything more. They will already overshadow the achievement with their incompetence and cruelty. Rubiales tries to congratulate me in the hotel lobby, but Alexia pulls me away from him before slipping away to presumably meet Fleur. I haven't spoken to my ex-teammate recently, knowing that my secret will spill out the minute our conversation starts. So far, only Alexia, Daniel, Vilda, and I know about what happened.

With the alcohol almost finished and the music still booming out of the speakers, most of the girls dance wildly. It is a wonder we still have the energy, and I expect our flights home to be very quiet tomorrow.

A hand swipes me away from my own group of friends, dragging me into a huddle of my cousin's. Laia, Irene, and Jenni all look at me with a smirk. "She's with Fleur, no?"

"Of course she is," I say.

"Well, good. That's good." Irene nods and then leaves us to seek out her family.

"How you feeling, mini Ale?" continues Jenni. "It's a big thing to win a World Cup, you know. Especially in such a terrible environment."

"Has Alexia told you?"

Laia and Jenni glance at each other.

"Only us," says Laia softly. "You are so brave."

"Jenni is brave."

The mentioned barks out a laugh. "Yes, I am. I should have punched him though. He really deserved it." Where Laia grows pitiful, Jenni grows bolder. "I don't know all the details of what happened to you, Talia, but I think you should do something about it. For the future generation, and for peace of mind." It is horrifying that Daniel gets to celebrate with us.

"What would I say? I don't want to make a fuss."

"I am going to make a fuss. In the most dignified, mature way, I am going to make noise. They shouldn't be allowed to get away with it, don't you think?"

"You have had a good career," I reply mournfully. Both are amused, and Jenni pats my shoulder. "I know it is pathetic, but I am terrified of them all."

As light-hearted as they may seem, Jenni's determined gaze lingers, awaiting my actual response. I feel a lump forming in my throat as I grapple with my choices. The weight of responsibility tugs at me, and I calculate the possible outcomes.

"I get it, Jenni, I really do," I confess, my voice barely audible over the music. "It is just that I am absolutely powerless, and they are not. I have fifteen years left to play. I do not want them to be fifteen years of scorn and whispers behind my back. I know that there is the noble thing to do and then... the other option. What if what you want me to do backfires completely?"

Laia interjects with a gentler tone, "Talia, we're here for you, no matter what you decide. But sometimes the right thing to do may also be the hardest."

Jenni nods in agreement, blue eyes filled with a mix of sympathy and outrage. It is a common way for them (her, Alexia, the like) to look at me. "Listen, I'm not saying you should jeopardise everything, but staying silent allows these things to happen again and again. We were quiet for years and squads have been broken because of it. Change is not something you can achieve by being passive. We owe it to everyone in this room – those of us with medals around our necks despite what we have had to jump over – to at least try, don't we?"

The reality of the situation sets in. It becomes more than a kiss. I feel, for a moment, compelled to share my history. The relationship with rape and assault that I already have, however unwanted it may be. But Alexia makes her way back into the room, hair ruffled and a distraction enough to pull me away from the cliff's edge I am about to jump off.

"I need time to think," I admit as my cousin begins to make her way towards us. "Let's enjoy tonight and celebrate. But, Jenni, I promise you, I'll seriously consider what you've said."

She squeezes my shoulder, offering me a supportive smile. "That's all I'm asking for, mini Ale. We've got your back, no matter what."

━━━━━━━

I sit next to Alexia on both planes home. We share her airpods, on the phone to her lawyers.

With her convincing, I send Mamá a voice message explaining the situation, just in case anything is leaked to the press. Mamá does not reply (it is too late in Spain) but I know that she will break. I resolve to sort things out before I see her next, just to give her peace of mind.

History seems to have repeated itself, but I will not subject my mother to the torment of it a second time. She will not have to suffer the brunt force of it if I place myself in the way.

"We will email them, it is decided," Alexia finally concludes, just as we land in Madrid.

There have been a plethora of emotions on this flight. Olga's haunting cries and Jenni's family's outraged shouts have underscored Alexia's search for a solution. She says that she does not care if the world is in her inbox to congratulate her. "The most important thing," she says, "is that you are safe. It is the most important thing to me, always."

She treats me as though I am her little sister. Alba and I have bonded over how patronising she can be.

"I am an adult," I remind her as we begin to disembark, entering our country as champions and welcomed as such. There is no time to change, and we go straight to the stage set up in the city. Alexia wears sunglasses to hide the bags under her eyes from hours spent forgoing sleep in favour of dealing with a mess created by a man who could not keep it in his pants.

I wonder what I will tell Clàudia.

"I'm grown up, you know. I'm going to email them myself. You were not the one who was assaulted."

"Yes, but–"

"Alexia." She checks her phone as microphones are handed out to us on the stage. "Alexia, it's really silly for you to involve yourself further. If they prickle, they will only damage your reputation too." She scoffs with her typical arrogance, and mutters something about how impossible that would be, but it is easy for me to slip away from her and into the arms of Salma before she can argue with me further.

"You look far too serious," Salma whispers in my ear as they bring out Fargo to sing for us. Her performance is quickly commandeered by Eva and Ona, who should never be given any form of microphone ever again, and I notice how everyone else is jumping up and down. Both my feet are firmly planted on the floor. "Would you like a shot? I have one of those little bottles of tequila. I stole it from the plane."

She flashes it to me, opening her palm quickly. "Can I have the whole thing?" I ask.

"Would you like some gin, too?"

Her cheer when I do not even wince is enough to get me in the winning spirit after a hellish journey home.

My headache afterwards thanks me for not joining everyone in Ibiza. I am going to stay in Madrid in a poky hotel room, away from Clàudia and my mother, and I am going to do what I need to do to fix this. For myself and by myself. Just Talia Segura, and no one else to ruin things even more. 

notes: 

short and to the point.

merry christmas eve from england at least!! i've escaped celebrations to update as much as i can before i spend the 25th to the 28th absolutely shit-faced (guess whose birthday is the 28th 😉😉😉)

the next chapter is gonna be funky icl. this fic is nearly finished and then hmc resumes!

thanks for reading xxx