---MATURE CONTENT AHEAD---

Ashton's POV

I had sobered up enough to know how completely fucking stupid I had been. What the fuck was I thinking, oh wait I wasn't thinking. She asked Jax to take her home and my blood boiled at the thought of what they could be doing or talking about. When I couldn't fathom my imagination running wild any longer, I picked up my phone and called him. I acted nonchalant on the call just asking him when he was coming but internally, I was the furthest thing from relaxed. I can't imagine how she must have felt when I told her what I did, would she ever trust me again? I teared up at the thought of losing her forever. I hear Jax open the door to our house and throw the keys on the kitchen counter. The jealousy I felt two minutes ago comes rushing back. I walk over to him. 

"Is she okay? What was she saying? What were you guys doing?" I ask him frantically. 

"No Ash, she's not okay she's hurt. She's not going to do anything stupid though, I think she realizes or knows that doing something dumb out of pain would not benefit her in any way," he says and I catch the shady remark he just threw at me. 

"I need to go to sleep and figure out how to fix this." That's the last thing I say before entering my room with the weight of my regrets hanging over my shoulder. 

- - - 

Evelyn's POV

I woke up with so much anxiety and such a bad hangover I ran over to my bathroom throwing up in the toilet, I flushed and brushed my teeth. I poured some cold water over my face and the back of my neck. I get a text message and I ignore it for a while as I stare at my ceiling. 

*Can we please talk*-Ashton. I close my eyes and make the decision that I will not be crying today. I hear a knock on my door as I tell whoever's knocking to come in. 

"You alright? When I got home, I heard you crying," My brother asked with a look of concern in his eyes, immediately I felt guilty because it reminded me of the look in his eyes that he used to have in the past. Ayden had sat down on the couch in my room. I sit up and look out of my window at the ocean and back at him. 

"Last night was a lot, Ashton's brother died almost a year ago. With his passing being so fresh and everything, well. Ashton's not taking it well, he did something dumb last night. I just feel betrayed, I wish he would've talked to me about it instead of acting on his impulses." I explain gently. Ayden's looking at the floor now and he sighs before getting up and sitting on my bed next to me. 

"When I thought, I was going to lose you, that you weren't going to open your eyes again, the night that Jax found you. I- everything went through my head Evelyn; I was already thinking of ten different things I was going to do that would've fucked up my life as well as hurt others around me. I didn't lose you that night thank God and thanks to Jax, but Ashton did end up losing his brother. Whatever he did, he needs to learn to come to you or talk about his feelings first. But try talking to him if you love him before walking away, trust me." He says giving me a pat on the back.

"Want to get breakfast together with Sadie? I'm sure you're as hungover as she is right now." He smiles and I laugh because he's probably right. I nod my head and tell him I'll be downstairs in a second. 

- - - 

A couple of days passed and after having an internal debate with myself on whether I should call Ashton or not I caved in and finally asked him to come and meet me at my dock. I was standing there now looking at the sunset, wishing I could fly away from the problems of this world. I hear footsteps behind me and my heart drops. I give Ashton a rather formal greeting and he looks hurt by it and honestly, all I want to do is hug him and kiss his soft lips and forget what happened. 

"Before you say anything, I want you to know that I'm sorry that you're hurting right now but if we're going to be together you can't ever push me away like that ever again. Talk to me, let me in the way you did when I met you and I promise to do the same." I say looking at his dreamy eyes that had the same expression of regret as the night of the party. He takes a step towards me, and I stay exactly where I'm standing. My breath caught in my throat. God, he looked so good in his grey sweatpants, white long-sleeve, and wet hair, he must have taken a shower and driven straight here. 

"I'm sorry Evelyn, I'll keep apologizing until my voice gives out if it means you'll look at me the same way you did when I met you." He says, whispering the last words. I smile at that because does he not notice the way I'm looking at him right now isn't much different?

I grab his hand and he caresses my face, running it past my hair. 

"Come on, I have a surprise for you," I say giving him a gentle smile. We walk towards the end of my dock and when he sees the paper lantern on the sand, he gives me a perplexed look. I reach into my pockets and hand him a folded paper and a pen along with a lighter for when he's finished. 

"Write your brother a letter, put it in the middle of the lantern, and when you're finished light the lantern and let it float away. It's like a mini memorial to pay your respects, I think it'll be healing for you." I smile. He looks at me astonished, speechless. 

"I don't deserve you," He whispers, I see his eyes water. 

"Oh, but you do, go on. I'll be right here." I say hugging him, I take a second to listen to his heart and thank God for helping me forgive. 

- - -

Once he was done, I stood beside him watching the paper lantern float away, it was beautiful and he let out a breath of relief like I thought he would. We sat there for a while until the sky darkened into different shades of blue. It was starting to get cold out and a slight breeze didn't help the goosebumps on my skin. 

"You're shaking," Ashton says. 

"Want to come inside? We can have dinner with my family and then watch a movie in my room?" I ask him, dazed by how much I missed him, emotionally and physically...

"Come on babe." He says, helping me up and pulling me into the side of his body as we walk back, he tries to shield me from the cold air with his arms. 

- - -

We ate wings and had chocolate mousse for dessert, Ashton had rolled his eyes at how the mousse had melted in his mouth and my parents were flattered at his compliments. Ayden seemed satisfied with my decision to forgive him and what I had done for Ashton and his brother. 

We made our way up to my room, and he closed the door behind us gently, locking it. Before I could say anything, his lips crashed into mine along with a tsunami of emotions. What we were together was everything I wanted to be to someone and more. His hands gripped at my rear, and I gripped at his neck. We wanted to climb into each other's skin and just stay there. 

"My parents are home Ash" I breathed. 

"Then I guess we'll just have to be quiet." He said without stopping.

 I moaned a little and he smirked into my lips, those dimples drove me insane. I pushed down on his sweatpants and pushed him on the bed. He took off his shirt, I took off my leggings in the process as well as my underwear. I climbed on top of him and started riding him as he thrust into me deeper. My body pressed on his as he removed my bra and squeezed my breasts. I moaned loudly at this, and he flipped me over. My eyes went wide with pleasure, and he told me to turn around. 

"What are you doing Ashton?" I asked with anticipation bubbling inside my stomach. That's when I feel a cool substance being placed in different areas of my back. It was chocolate syrup. 

"How did you manage to sneak that past the kitchen?" I chuckled. He laughs, "I have my ways."  

He starts licking the chocolate off my back in every spot that he puts it on, and I moan into my pillow as he starts licking elsewhere. 

"You like how this feels?" He asks in a tone of voice that makes my eyes roll back. I feel him press into me as he thrusts inside me not even giving me a second to catch my breath. I bite on my pillow to keep from being loud and he grabs a fistful of my hair tugging it gently, just enough for me to feel an undiscovered form of pleasure from it. I arch my back as he continues to thrust into me. I look back and he's smirking as he makes eye contact with my green eyes and that sends me completely over the edge. It had been so long since I felt this type of pleasure, nobody had ever made me feel like this, I've never had sex with someone like this. I stop moaning into my pillow. The pleasure, the love, the past, the heat, and suddenly I felt like I couldn't breathe. I'm staring at my hands begin to shake and I curse myself for the timing of it all. I don't know how Ashton noticed before I could tell him to stop but he pulled out of me gently and got beside me as I turned around. 

"Hey, hey baby what is it? Did I do something wrong?" He whispers rubbing my knee. I shake my head wiping my forehead. "No, you didn't, I- I just I don't know what happened I got in my head for a second," I say. I could see the guilt in his eyes, he thought I was talking about what happened with Nicky. 

"It's not about that Ash, I forgave you and I meant it. Everything just feels so good with you. I've never been touched like that before. I've never felt this way with anyone else, that scares me.

He pulls me into him gently.

"Whatever you ask for, I'll be that for you. Whatever you need, I'll go above and beyond to give it to you." He says as covers both of us in my sheets. I don't know what I was ever holding on to before him. I don't know how I ever breathed properly without him nearby. 

"I never knew how much I needed everything you are to me." He whispers. 

- - -