CHAPTER EIGHT || BEGINNING OF THE END

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A few days had passed since Hershel's accident, and Alex had been checking in on him almost every hour Ensuring he was healing, and infections were kept at bay. the sadness that had lingered between the group was slowly fading as Hershel began to recover and regain his strength. For the first time in days, Alex stepped outside the walls of the prison, being more than just a  few rooms away from Hershel.

she could feel the tension in the air as Axel tried to negotiate with Rick. She didn't trust the prisoners, and she could tell that Rick was feeling the same way. she didn't particularly want to send them away to fend for themselves especially considering the fact they had little to no experience dealing with walkers. but they were prisoners, she didn't know what they were capable of and around Lori.. carl, she didn't want to risk it.

As Rick locked the gate behind Axel and Oscar, Alex watched as T-Dog expressed his displeasure. She understood where he was coming from, but she knew that Rick had made the right decision. She took a deep breath and tried to push her doubts aside. They had come this far, and they couldn't afford to let their guard down now.

"sending them out there might as well execute them ourselves" T-Dog argued looking around the group for anyone who agreed, his caring side showing as he tried convincing the group not to send the two men out knowing they wouldn't last long.

"I don't know, Axel seems a bit unstable," Glenn stated, Alex nodding agreeing. In Alex's mind, Axel didn't seem the type to survive a day but she also didn't trust him around Beth and Carl. they had to think of the whole group, not just one man.

"after all, we've been through, we fought so hard for all this. what if they decide to take it." Carol explained looking at T-dog, desperation laced her voice as her eyes flickered to Rick.

"It's just been us for so long they're strangers. it feels weird all of a sudden having other people around" Maggie explained, Alex just wanted to be done with it and clear the rest of the walker's bodies from the yard and prison and finally start to make this place safe enough for her cousin, her family.

"you took us in" T-dog countered looking over at Maggie whose arms were crossed over her chest, agreeing with Alex. wanting this over with so she could tend to her injured father.

despite morals, despite humanity. the safety of the ones she loved would always come first.

"but you turned up with a shot boy, didn't really give us a choice" T-Dog scoffed in response to Maggie's words. The whole conversation was pointless, the decision had already been made, and Rick was done with it.

"I get guys like this. hell, I grew up with 'em. they're degenerates, but they ain't psychos. I could've been in there with them just as easy as I'm out here with you." Daryl explained, Alex looking over with him wondering if he had now changed his mind and agreed with T-Dog.

"so you're with me?" T-dog asked looking at Daryl, hoping the gruff man would agree yet Daryl shook his head with a grunt., his arm swinging as he shook his head, the crossbow on his shoulder almost falling.

"hell no. let them take their chances out on the road like we did."Daryl scoffed securing the crossbow on his shoulder as his eyes met Alex's and they shared a mutual look of agreement. Rick went on to explain about a kid he arrested when he was a rookie cop, about a kid who stabbed his girlfriend but suckered the jury, to only shoot another girl two weeks later.

"Our deal with them stands" Rick stated looking at T-Dog before he and Daryl walked off.  the rest of the group followed as Alex locked eyes with Glenn, he noticed the very subtle sadness that lingered behind the girl's bright blue eyes, that almost matched Rick's.

"move the cars to the upper yard. they'll be out of the way but ready if we ever need to bail" Rick stated, Alex watched as Glenn ran ahead, his hair falling back in the wind. Rick fell behind to speak to T-Dog, Alex walking with Daryl. the two shared a mutual look agreeing this was the right thing to do with the prisoners. a mutual understanding stood between the two. protect everyone at all costs. Daryl and the rest of the group walked out of the gates retrieving their cars, And Daryl's motorbike while Alex and Glenn stood by the gate to open and close it once they had driven in.

"you think we're doing the right thing?" Glenn asked looking out seeing the two prisoners still stood by the gate as the cars drove into the yard. Alex watched as Glenn closed the gate once all the cars had made it inside, thinking over the decision.

"Lori is days away from having the baby.  we can't have people we don't know. especially prisoners around that baby, or Carl. I don't want your or anyone else's blood on my hands" Alex stated as the two began walking back up into the yard not looking back at the prisoners watching them. Glenn nodded, he agreed. but that didn't mean he had to like it, he wanted to save everyone. he wanted everyone to live.

"you can't save everyone. that's something you have to learn Glenn" Alex stated as the two walked, Glenn looked over at her, his mind immediately going to the people he lost, his parents, Andrea, Jackie, Sophia... Dale.

"I know that. but keeping your humanity is important.." Dale's voice popped into Glenn's head as he spoke those words. reminding him of all the losses they'd faced. and how he so desperately didn't want to lose anyone else, it had been such a close call with Hershel.. almost a wake-up call reminding them of how careful they truly had to be.

Alex and Glenn grabbed weeks' worth of food, making their way over to the prisoners hoping that would at least give them a chance, Handing it over to Axel one of the Prisoners Glenn looking over to Alex stood beside him as he closed the gate, his jaw clenched as he tried to come to terms with the decision they'd made...

"thank you bro" Axel stated as Alex and Glenn turned to walk away, but Glenn turned back. Alex sighed, knowing his kindness might get him into unnerving situations at some point. trusting too easily being too nice.. people take advantage.

**

Glenn, Rick and Daryl had slipped out into the woods to collect some firewood while talking about starting to go on runs. after slipping back through the gap they'd originally made in the fence after finding the prison. relief flooding through their bodies as they looked up into the prison courtyard, immediately dropping the firewood, smiles coming to their faces.

"Alright, Hershel!!" Glenn exclaimed happily a big smile on his face, relief flushing through his veins. he was really okay. grinning ear to ear Glenn watched as Hershel walked with the support of the crutches. Alex stood beside Hershel with a smile, ready to help support him if needed Lori on the other side of him Doing the same as Alex.

Carl stood next to Alex with a smile, disbelief rushed through the group happiness radiating through the air, Hershel was okay, really okay. his energy was back, his strength was back, at least enough to get to his feet. things were finally looking up. Until Carl's panicked yell filled the air, and any happiness fizzled out in seconds.

"walkers!" he exclaimed pointing behind them, Alex immediately turned to see the group of walkers heading right toward them. Automaticallyalex reached for the pistol tucked into her jeans. adrenaline filling her body as she raised her gun. Lori did the same as the pair tried to control the group of walkers... but they barely even made a dent.

"Go!" a string of panicked yells filled Alex's ears. Rick, Daryl, and Glenn ran as fast as they could to the group from the other side of the yard. Hearts raced as Alex's eyes darted from the walkers to Maggie and T-dog.

"Maggie! over there!" Alex exclaimed pointing to a secure area so the girl could get her family to safety as Alex focused on Carl and Lori. Shooting more walkers didn't make a difference. sweat beading on Alex's forehead as her eyes scanned the area for a way to escape. she had to get them to safety.

Beth and Hershel Rushing to a closed gated area, where Alex had pointed to. Maggie followed as they closed the gate behind them. they were safe. Maggie shooting any walkers close by. before her attention turned to Alex as she shot the walkers surrounding the family.

"Lori! Carl let's go!" Alex Yelled signalling for them to run to the Door of the Cellblock. Carl and Lori rush over to Alex. She lead them to what she believed to be safe. her lungs heaved as she slammed the door behind them. Alex's heart raced, she needed to keep them safe. She had to. She could not let Rick down. She'd keep them safe. for rick.

Alex turned the corner into their cell block only to see more walkers, startled she raised her gun  automatically shooting one of them before turning on her heel ushering Carl and Lori through another door. Closing the door behind them, her heart raced. she had to keep them safe.

Alex led Carl and Lori further into the prison, her stomach churning with unease and adrenaline. her gun held high as she searched for a way out or a way back to the group, safety in numbers. The dark, damp corridors were confusing, and Alex had a nagging feeling that they were lost. An Alarm blared, the sound causing a rush of memories to spiral through  Alex's mind as she tried to stay focused.

"Now what the fuck is that?" Alex huffed her nerves on edge. She tried to keep her cool. the loud noise was unsettling, reminding her of combat. taking a deep breath she had to stay composed, she couldn't let it happen right now. She looked over at Carl, who was copying her every move, her heart racing as her worry for the young boy increased.

A pained groan made Alex turn, anxiety flooding through her body as her eyes laid on Lori. leaning against the wall, gripping her stomach. "Shit, you gotta keep up," Alex said, assuming that Lori's pregnancy was making it difficult for her to move quickly. moving to her aunt's side, she pulled Lori's arm over her own shoulders before wrapping her arm around Lori's waist. they needed to keep moving.

"What's wrong?" Carl asked his expression one of pure panic. Adrenaline pumping through their veins as the echoing Alarm filled them with anxiety.

"It's nothing," Lori said, trying to catch her breath. "I just need a minute."

Alex looked around, trying to figure out where the alarm was coming from. She motioned for Carl and Lori to follow her, and they started rushing down the hallway. Alex helped Lori move as fast as they could, her muscles flexing as she supported half of Lori's weight. As they ran, Alex could feel her heart pounding in her chest. She had been in dangerous situations before, but this was different. She was with Lori, Carl. and they didn't know what was going on. What about the others?

"Something's not right," Lori groaned, pain consuming her lower stomach. Alex felt a rush of anxiety through her body as realisation washed over her... the baby.

"What? Are you bit?" Carl panicked, rushing toward his mother only for another pained groan to leave her lips. Alex's eyes widened as she looked at Lori, while trying to support her weight.

"No, no, no. I think the baby's coming," Lori turned to face Alex in a panic as she escaped Alex's grasp leaning against the wall. Carl's face dropped as he realized what was happening, the alarm still blaring. Now the gruelling sound of walkers getting closer took Carl and Alex's attention.

"No. There's no time. Come on," Alex took Lori's arm over her shoulder as she led her and Carl in a different direction as another group of walkers followed them. Cursing under her breath, Alex's heart raced, bile rising in her throat. She couldn't do this. she needed Rick.

"In here!" Carl exclaimed, opening a door. Alex helped Lori into the room. Panic flooded through her veins. Hershel was supposed to do this, not Alex. She wasn't trained for this. She couldn't do what she wasn't trained to.. she needed Eli, he should've been there... not her.

"Lock the door, Carl," Alex ordered. Carl did what his cousin said, following them further into the room. Alex led Lori down some stairs into the room, which seemed to be some kind of mechanical room. Lori leaned against the wall, groaning in pain. Alex took a deep breath, running a hand through her hair, trying to mentally prepare for what was about to happen. she had to be okay, Lori had to be okay...

"What are those alarms?" Lori groaned, trudging further into the room, Carl and Alex following. Lori's pain-filled groans filled Alex's ears, her chest constricted with worry as Carl looked up to her for answers for a solution...

"Don't worry about it," Alex stated, looking Lori up and down, worry clear in her eyes as she took a deep breath trying to control her own emotions.

"We have to get back to our cell block and have Hershel help us," Carl stated in a panicked state as Lori leaned against the wall, taking deep breaths in an attempt to control the pain.

"The baby is coming now," Lori stated through gritted teeth, the excruciating pain consuming her. Alex looked at Carl and shook her head as Lori's breathing became more frantic.

"Alright, you've gotta give birth to this baby here. Let's get your pants off," Alex ordered as she composed herself. Lori nodded, consumed by pain. Alex helped discard the womans pants. she could do this. she had to.

"You gotta help me deliver this baby, Jelly Bean. Can you do that for me?" Alex stated, sitting between Lori's legs as she looked up at her cousin, the fear in his eyes, one look Alex never wanted to see upon the young boy's face, she just wanted to protect him.

"Yeah," he nodded, panic etched onto his face. Alex moved to take Lori's underwear off while she tried to compose herself. She only knew the basics of this, if that. She tried to remember, thoughts rushing through her mind as she tried to remember everything Hershel had said, everything Carol had said, everything Eli had taught her.

"I gotta push... I gotta push," Lori's voice was strained, pain clear in her voice as she sat up slightly against the cold floor, the thick tension throughout the room only growing with each second that passed.

"Okay, Lori, you can do this. Just breathe and push when you're ready," Alex said, trying to keep her voice calm and reassuring. Lori needed her to be strong, and so did Carl. Alex looked up at her aunt and nodded with a smile in an attempt to reassure her. Lori Stood up again gripping a metal pole against the wall, Alex stood behind her holding her aunt steady rubbing her back as she strained in pain pushing.

"You're doing great, Lori," Alex reassured her aunt as she pushed again, groaning in pain, tension thick in the room. Lori kept pushing, groans and screams of pain leaving her lips as Alex tried to coach her through it. the sound of Lori's pained shrieks causing the hairs on the back of Alex's neck to stand tall.

"Lori, stop! Don't push! Something's wrong," Alex exclaimed, seeing the blood pouring down Lori's legs. A scream of frustration mixed with pain slipped past Lori's lips as Carl watched in shock. staring down at the blood that coated Alex's hands she froze a  wave of panic washing over her as she tried to figure out what was going on. Alex lowered Lori back down to the floor, laying her aunt down Carl rushed to his mother, holding her hand.

"Mom?" Carl questioned, fear rushing through his body upon seeing his mom like this. His heart was racing as he looked to his cousin for an explanation. but she didn't know... and there it was, that helplessness again, the same feeling she experienced all those weeks ago with Eli.

"I'm not gonna make it...I know what it means, and I'm not losing my baby. You've gotta cut me open," Lori's voice was weak, the colour draining from her face as she stared up at Alex. her words shot through Alex's heart as she shook her head in disbelief, there had to be something.

"Lori, no. I don't know how," Alex's voice trembled slightly. Lori was one of the only family members Alex had left. She'd just gotten her back. She couldn't do that, not to Lori.

"Alex, you have to do it. There's no time. I trust you," Lori said, her voice barely above a whisper yet laced with desperation, despite the blaring alarm the room was silent, blood pulsing in Alex's ears as tears sprung to her eyes.  Alex took a deep breath, trying to steady her hands. She knew that this was going to be the hardest thing she'd ever done, but she had to do it.

"Carl has a knife. My baby has to survive. Alex, you are one of the kindest people I know. I trust you to protect my children.... You have a heart of gold, and I know you will do everything in your power to give my baby a chance at life. I believe in you, Alex... You're going to beat this world just like carl... you have a future ahead of you. I've seen the way Glenn looks at you, and I know you're going to do great things. That's all I want for Carl and this baby." Lori's words took Alex by surprise, as tears streamed down her face, her words broke Alex's heart a deep pain in her chest grew as she looked down at Lori.

"I love you, Alex. Please. look after my children.." Alex looked down at her aunt, wiping the tears from her eyes, and nodded. something in her heart breaking so violently, she swore it could be heard from miles away. the pain in her chest almost paralysing as she watched Lori turn her head toward carl.

"Carl?" Lori looked over at her son, tears brimming in his eyes as he sat beside his mother, gripping hold of her hand, Alex's hands trembled as her eyes flickered down to her blood-coated hands, waves of grief washing over her almost as if feeling the loss of everyone all over again.

"I don't want you to be scared. This is what I want. This is right. Now, you take care of your daddy for me and your little brother or sister." Lori's voice pained as she looked up at her distraught son, the atmosphere in the room was cold as Alex's eyes remained fixated on her hands...

"you don't have to do this" his voice breaking as tears escaped his eyes running down his cheeks, squeezing his mom's hand desperately wishing this wasn't what had to happen. there had to be another way, the young boy's body entangled with grief as he clutched his mother's hand, he wasn't ready for her to leave yet...

"you're going to be fine. you are gonna beat this world too, I know you will. you are smart, and you are strong. and you are so brave. and I love you." The emotion in Lori's voice was raw, causing an ache to emerge deep in Alex's chest as her face contorted from the pain that soared through her body.

"I love you too" Carl's voice trembled as tears spilled down his cheeks, guilt washing over him from how he'd spoken to his mother in the previous days. grief already pouring through his veins, unable to fathom how this was happening...

"you've got to do what's right baby. you promise me you always do what's right? it's so easy to do the wrong thing in this world.... so if it feels wrong don't do it. alright? if it feels easy don't do it. don't let the world spoil you. you're so good." Lori's voice broke as she held back tears, wiping carls from his face tears evident in Lori's eyes as she tried to stay strong for her little boy.

"my sweet boy, the best thing I ever did. I love you" Carl hugged his mom, crying into her shoulder as tears slipped down Alex's cheeks as she tried to keep her composure, but she'd already lost so many people.  Lori Sobbed as she held Carl in her arms before she broke the hug, tears spilling down her cheeks.

"Alex when this is over. you're gonna have to do it" Lori stated, Alex immediately knew what she was talking about and more tears welled up in her eyes, wiping her cheeks she nodded. how desperately she wished she could go back in time and hold her aunt for just a second longer...

"I know..." Alex's voice was weak as Carl handed her the Knife, Looking at Lori, Alex felt bile rising in her throat at the task at hand, nausea clawing at her stomach. guilt already rolling in as she attempted pulling herself together but the grief was nauseating.

"goodnight love" Lori's voice was soft, quiet as she looked at the ceiling. Alex looked down at the knife tears in her eyes Blurring her vision. the thought made her chest tighten as she stared down at the knife.. First Eli.. Now the woman who'd taken on the role of Alex's mother. How was she supposed to live with herself?

"I'm sorry.." Alex whispered placing the knife against Lori's skin, pressing down slightly she slowly sliced Lori's stomach open careful not to go too deep and harm the baby. pained screams leaving Lori's lips, made the tears stream down Alex's cheeks as she repeated her previous words.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry" Her voice was barely above a whisper as she sliced through the next layer of muscle in order to get to the baby her blurred vision and trembling hands making the task difficult. Another pained scream left lori's lips as Alex sliced open her uterus, blood covering Lori's skin. and Alex...

a sob threatened to leave Alex's lips when Lori fell silent. the silence making her feel sick. she grimaced, Reaching into Loris's stomach, the bile in Alex's throat rose higher as she felt the baby. Carefully Alex tried to get a good grip on the baby, slowly pulling it from Lori's stomach. she couldn't stop the tears in her eyes from falling as she held the baby in her arms gently rubbing its chest trying to urge the baby girl to breathe...

"come on. please..." Tears spilt down Alex's cheeks as she rubbed the poor baby's chest desperately needing to hear a cry come from its small body, but it didn't come and she felt her heart skip a beat.

"please" her voice cracked as she turned the baby so she could gently pat her back, desperation clear in Alex's eyes her face contorted by grief, then she heard it. the baby girls cry.

Carl pulled his flannel shirt from his body handing it to Alex, the baby's cries flooding the girl with relief, filling the painfully silent room, as she wrapped the baby in Carl's flannel. standing up Alex cradled the baby in her arm, she stared down at the baby, blood covering its pale skin as she cradled her in her own arms... she was beautiful...

"We have to go," Alex whispered, pulling her eyes from the baby as she looked down at Carl, his blue eyes glued to the body of his lifeless mother laid on the floor. alex's breath caught in her throat as she swallowed the bile rising in her throat.

"We can't just leave her here. she'll turn" Carl stated his voice trembling as he tore his eyes away from his mother, Alex nodded looking down at the baby. she had to do it, she had to be the one, she could not let Carl... she couldn't even let him see it.

"Carl wait up there." Alex nodded toward the door they came in, Alex looked down to see his gun in his hand. tilting her head to the side as she shook her head. he was a child. he needed to be protected.. and so far, she wasn't doing a good job at that... but lori's words.. lingered in her mind.

"Carl go now." Alex's voice was stern, he did not need to do that, he's a kid he needs to be safe. the stern look on her face sending Carl over to the door. Alex took a deep breath looking down at her Aunt the crying baby still in her arms. as she shifted the baby in her arms so she could pull the pistol from her waistband.

"I'm so sorry Lori... I love you, I'll look after them" A tear slipped down Alex's Cheek as she raised the gun, taking another breath as she pulled the trigger sending a bullet through Lori's skull.

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an // icl im editing this first half of the book and i still don't like it 😭😭

it feels really rushed I promise you it does get better

I am now re-writing! if you're a new reader, I hope you are enjoying it, please do leave feedback and comments they motivate me to write lol.