Chapter 5: Runway

I stood whole naked in front of the full-length mirror as I traced the pendant on my neck. The second I took it off my body, my reflection in the mirror slowly faded until there's nothing.

Sometimes when I don't wear this, I forget what I look like. I've been living for centuries now, but my memories of the past were still crystal clear in my head. That's the only thing I hate about myself. I remember everything.

Huminga ako nang malalim bago umupo sa kama at sinandal ang likod sa ulunan nito. Hubo't hubad pa rin ako habang nakatingin sa cell phone ko.

I scrolled through my photos. Napangiti na lang ako habang pinagmamasdan ang mga litrato ko. I have been through a lot of things, but I like my life better now.

These photos will become memories someday. I don't age, but everyone does. Just because I don't age doesn't make I can stay who I am today. The changes in my life were forced.

I know one day, I will be forced to take a different path to create a different identity.

Umangat ang tingin ko kay Kristan na nakatayo sa pintuan ko. Naka sweat pants lang itong puti habang hawak si Lilly. The bitch gets thicker everyday. It's been just a week!

"Ayaw mo bang mag-lunch?" tanong niya.

"Are you offering me your cat?"

He shook his head. Napansin kong humigpit pa ang pagkakahawak niya sa pusa. Iritado pa rin ako sa pesteng 'yon, pero hindi ko maipagkakailang malaki ang naitulong niya kay Kristan.

"Just a wine will do," I said.

Binalik ko sa screen ng cell phone ang atensyon ko. Lilly has been unusually cool with me. Hindi na niya ako gaanong naasar dahil tahimik lang siya. But there's something about her that's bothering me.

"I will get you one," I heard him.

Pinatong ko sa kama ang cell phone bago nag-inat ng katawan. Binuksan ko ang kurtina. Mataas na ang sikat ng araw. Today is my free day. Wala akong ibang gagawin kung hindi ang manatili sa bahay.

I pulled myself a comfortable robe and went out of my room. Naabutan kong nagsasalin ng wine si Kristan sa kitchen. Umupo ako sa stool at tinitigan si Lilly na nakaupo sa ibabaw ng lamesa.

"Meow," she whispered as she scratched the back of her ears.

I glared at her. She suddenly stopped scratching her ears.

"I don't want to hear their thoughts again," dinig kong sabi ni Kristan. Humarap siya sa akin saka nilapag sa harapan ko ang wine glass.

I sighed. "Then, don't."

"Paano?" He sat on the chair across from me. "I didn't want to hear their thoughts, pero bigla ko na lang naririnig. It's bothering me."

I sipped on my wine. I seriously don't know the answer to that. Hindi ko alam kung kailan ko natutunang isarado ang isipan sa iba at huwag basta-basta pasukin ang isipan nila. It just happened.

He pouted his lips while rubbing his palms against Lilly's white fur. I could tell the bitch loved it since she leaned her head on his hand.

"I want to go for a jog," Kristan said.

Hindi ako kumibo. Nakatingin lang ako kay Lilly habang umiinom ng wine. Pilit kong iniintindi kung ano ang nagtutulak sa akin para tuluyan siyang magustuhan.

"Just for ten minutes," he added.

I didn't respond. Malawak ang likod ng building at wala gaanong pumunta roon. Doon madalas na nagj-jogging si Kristan tuwing umaga o kung gusto niya lang magpahangin.

"I will be back in ten minutes. Ikaw muna ang bahala kay Lilly, ah?"

Naubos ko ang wine ko nang nakatingin lang ako kay Lilly. Nakahiga na siya ngayon sa lamesa at sa tingin ko'y nakatulog na.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked Lilly.

Narinig kong tumunog ang front door kaya malamang na nakalabas na si Kristan. Hinila ko ang buntot ni Lilly para ilapit siya sa akin. Hindi naman ito umalma.

Her fur was as white as snow. Masarap iyong hawakan.

"Lilly..." I called her name. "I think you need a make over."

Napangiti ako.

Binuhat ko ang pusa saka dinala sa kwarto ko. Kinuha ko ang mga cosmetic products ko saka inayos sa kama. Mahimbing pa rin ang tulog ni Lilly.

Mahaba ang mga kuko ni Lilly hindi hindi ako nahirapan na kulayan ito ng pula. Napangiwi pa ako nung tila makiliti siya kaya dinilaan niya.

"Stop!" Tinulak ko ang ulo niya. "See? Nagkakulay ka tuloy sa dila. Stupid."

May maliit akong mga alahas na pinasuot sa kanya. May anklet siya at necklace na pula. Kinulayan ko rin nang kaunti ang kanyang labi. Pumunit ako ng tela sa damit ko para mabigyan siya ng damit.

"Done!"

Pinagmasdan ko si Lilly. Napangiti ako at sa sobrang tuwa ay nayakap siya.

I think I like her now.

Para pambawi sa kanya ay pinakain ko siya. Natawa pa ako dahil kapag nakikita ko ang dila niya ay nakikita ko rin ang kulay pula roon na dumikit.

"I'm here!"

I took her a picture on my cell phone. Good thing her eyes were wide awake and they were even lazily staring at me. She looked... fabulous!

"Have you seen Lilly?"

Nakangiting humarap ako kay Kristan. Bumaba ang tingin niya sa kama ko. Agad na nagsalubong ang kanyang mga kilay nung makita si Lilly.

"Isn't she lovely?" I giggled.

"W-what did you to her?"

"Just a slight make over."

He looked stunned. I know it's because of his pet's biggest glow up. Naisip ko tuloy na simula ngayon ay ako na ang mag-aayos kay Lilly.

"You painted her nails," he noticed.

I nodded. "Yeah. Blush red."

"Her lips..."

"I kind of messed up in that part. Masyadong manipis ang mga labi niya kaya pati sa bandang ilong ay nalagyan ko. Kaunti lang naman. Did you like it?"

Kristan looked at me in disbelief. Pagkatapos ay binuhat na niya si Lilly at nilabas ng kwarto ko. Susunod pa sana ako sa kwarto nila nung sinarado niya ang pinto.

I was about to knock when I heard my phone ring in my room. Tamad na pumasok ako sa kwarto para sagutin ang tawag. Of course it was my annoying manager.

"Your dresses have arrived here," he said.

"The fashion show is tomorrow." I yawned.

"I know. I am just telling you just in case you want to try them today. Or do you want me to send them in your place?"

"Okay..."

After the call, my finger unconsciously went to my private gallery where I stored the scandal of Kathlysse. I watched it for the second time. Then, I found myself calling someone.

"Hey! What's up?" Dylan asked.

"Does Wilson have a girlfriend?"

"Oh, shit. Are you seriously asking me that?"

"Just answer me!"

"I'm on recording studio right now. Let's just meet later—"

"Does he have one?"

He sighed. I was getting annoyed.

"Yes. Why, Nath?"

I ended the call.

I went to my phone browser to check who Wilson is. He's a Hollywood celebrity who is currently engaged with his long-time girlfriend, Evelyn.

"A bitch..." I chuckled. "And a jerk."

That suddenly urge me to ignite a scandal, but I managed to stop myself. No. Not today. I know I can use this one better for my future plans.

Kinabukasan ay maaga akong nagising dahil maaga rin ang fashion show. Dumating na kahapon ang mga dress pero hindi ko na rin nagawang isukat pa.

I spent an hour inside the shower room. Nagpapatuyo ako ng buhok nung makaramdam ng uhaw. I put on my robe and went out of my room.

"Holy shit!" Kristan gasped. "You startled me."

I arched my brows. Nakatago sa likod niya ang mga kamay.

"I'm hungry," I told him.

"The food has arrived. Nasa kitchen," nakangiti niyang sabi.

Tumango ako at aktong maglalakad na palayo nung bigla ko siyang inikutan. Hindi niya nga napansin na nasa likod na niya ako.

"Oh, my feels!" I gasped.

"Shit!" Mabilis na umatras palayo sa akin si Kristan. "It was my fault!"

Inagaw ko sa kanya ang isa sa mga dress ko. Gusto kong maniwala na siya ang salarin pero nung makita ko ang mga maliliit na kagat ay alam kong hindi talaga siya.

"I'm sorry, Nath."

I swallowed. Hando will surely scold me for this. I have three dresses for the fashion show today and these are the most important clothing of the show.

I bit my bottom lip. I was frustrated that one of my dresses was damaged, but I was even more upset to see such a stunning dress in this mess. I really hate seeing fancy things wasted like this.

It's that damn cat. I was about to run into his room because I knew she's sleeping in his bed, but Kristan blocked my way in. Halatang kabado siya habang nakatayo sa harapan ko.

"It's just a cat..." He looked like he would beg for his pet's life any moment now. "I'm really sorry, Nath. You can punish me instead."

"Let me in, Kristan."

He shook his head.

Tutulak ko na sana siya nung biglang tumunog ang doorbell. Pabagsak na inabot ko kay Kristan ang sirang dress saka siya inutusan na itago 'yon sa kanyang kwarto.

Nakangiting pinagbuksan ko si Hando.

"Good morning, Miss Cardinal!"

"It's Nathalia."

"Right..." He gave me a tight hug. "Nakaayos ka na ba?"

Dumiretso si Hando sa sofa at agad na tumutok sa kanyang cell phone. Napansin ko namang lumabas ng kwarto si Kristan. Gaya ng sinabi ko ay hindi na niya hawak ang nasirang dress.

"I'm almost done. Sinuot ko lang ulit 'yung dalawang dress para mamaya," sagot ko.

In my peripheral vision, I saw Kristan looking at me.

"Get us some wine, Kristan," I told him.

He was hesitant at first, but then he entered his room. Paglabas niya ay buhat na niya si Lilly saka sila magkasamang pumunta ng kitchen. He was probably making sure I won't touch his pet.

"Wait..." Hando looked up at me. "Dalawang dress?"

"Yeah. I think I like my hair in bun style this time. What do you think?"

Hando stood up. "Nathalia. There were three dresses for this fashion show!"

"Three?" Kumunot ang noo ko. "You only sent me two!"

Natigilan siya. Alam kong napaisip siya.

"Seriously, Hando? Baka naman dalawa lang talaga?"

"No!" Kinalikot niya sandali ang kanyang cell phone. "I'm sure tatlo ang dress na 'yon. Wait. Let me contact the designer."

"Sure. Mag-aayos na ako."

Pagpasok ko sa kwarto ay bumalik ang inis ko sa pusa. Sana lang ay hindi mapaghalataan ni Hando na nagsisinungaling ako.

Akala ko pa naman ay bati na kami ng pusa na 'yon. She just raised a war against me. I can't deal with her yet. Baka mamaya na lang pagbalik ko.

Kristan entered my room. Binigay niya sa akin ang isang red wine. Uminom ako roon habang nakatingin sa kanya. Agad siyang umiwas ng tingin.

"I'm really sorry—"

"Hush! Don't mention it."

I sat down in front of the vanity mirror. Kinuha ko sa isang maliit na box ang kwintas ko. Sinuot ko 'yon habang nakatingin sa salamin. I waited for my reflection to show up before I stood up.

"Anyway, ngayon na pala mag-uumpisa ang driving lesson ko," ani Kristan. "Don't worry about me. Ayon kay Hando ay isa rin itong bampira."

"Who says I'm worried about you?"

I smirked as I turned to him. His eyes didn't show any emotion.

"You are my slave..." I walked towards him. Pinaragasa ko sa kanyang katawan ang aking kamay. "You are here to serve me, Mr. Admiral. I think you should get a grip on yourself and start acting one. My patience is wearing thin."

Before I even stepped out of my room, he said words that struck me.

"If I can't be your friend, no one can."

I immiediately shrugged his words away when I saw my manager's face. Namumula na ang mukha niya habang nakatingin sa akin.

"What?" I asked.

"I sent you three dresses." Then, he showed me the picture.

I sighed. "Nasira ang isa. Ano ang magagawa ko?"

"How careless—"

Hindi niya natuloy ang sasabihin nung hawakan ko siya sa leeg saka sinandal sa wall. Naramdaman niya sa kanyang leeg ang tulis ng aking mga kuko.

"I am not in the mood to argue right now, Roman Hando. Choose for me. Do you want me to attend the fashion show or not?"

Madiin siyang napapikit. Umagos na sa kanyang leeg ang dugo nung tumusok sa leeg niya ang tulis ng kuko ko. Namantsahan tuloy ang itim niyang suit.

"Fine!" He pushed me away. Saka niya pinagdagan ang kanyang sarili. "Where are the dresses?"

"Here..." Nilabas ni Kristan ang dalawang dress.

Nagkita ang mga mata namin, pero ako ang unang umiwas ngayon. Nagkunwari akong abala sa pag-aayos ng buhok habang nakatingin sa ibang direksyon.

"Thank you. Darating dito mamaya si Elvis. Siya ang magtuturo sa 'yong magmaneho. Kung may iba ka pang tanong, sasagutin din niya."

"Okay. Please take care of her."

Huh?

Hando chuckled. "Sure."

Ako ang unang lumabas at hindi na muling lumingon pabalik. Sumunod si Hando na may hawak sa dalawang dress. Napansin kong nakangisi siya.

"Hestia won't make it there," sabi ni Hando pagkapasok namin ng elevator. "May emergency raw siyang pupuntahan."

"How about Kathlysse?" Inayos ko ang hikaw ko dahil nakalimutan kong i-lock. "Oh, I'm sure she's going to be there."

"She's really a hard working woman. Sa tagal na ng career niya, isa pa lang show yata ang na-cancel niya. She will attend no matter what."

"As she should," I smirked. "She's easy to replace."

Hando sighed but didn't say a word.

Si Hando ang nagmaneho papunta sa venue. Sa labas pa lang ay marami ng photographer. May mga guard na pumalibot sa akin habang papasok sa likod ng venue. Agad akong pinasok sa dressing room.

"Good morning, Gorgeous Nathalia!"

Natigilan ako nung mabosesan siya.

"Lady Merryl!" I exclaimed.

"Oh, my dear. I missed you!"

We shared a warming hug. Lady Merryl was the one who taught me about fashion . Yeah. I suck at fashion back then. She became my mentor. Pero nung sumikat na ako ay mas pinili niyang bigyan ako ng laya.

"I missed you more," I whispered.

Hinarap ko siya. Hindi ako emotional pero naluha ako sa mga sandaling ito. Sobrang dami nang nangyari simula nung iwan niya ako ilang taon na ang nakakalipas.

"Are you back for good?" I asked.

"You can say that."

"Oh, my feels!" I wiped my tears.

"How are you, Nathalia Cardinal?"

"I'm good." I smiled.

She sighed. "Anyway. Shall we start?"

It's been a long time since I felt this kind of comfort while preparing for the fashion show. Iba talaga kapag si Lady Merryl na ang nag-ayos sa akin.

"The show will start any moment." Pumasok si Hando. Napangiti siya nung makita ako. "You look okay now."

"Why? What happened?" Lady Merryl asked.

Hando chuckled. "Nothing, Lady Merryl. I'm just taking care of Nathalia."

Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay, pero tinawanan niya lang ako. Lumabas din siya ng dressing room para daw puntahan si Kathlysse.

The show has started and I am still in the dressing room. Sa last pa naman ako kaya okay lang kung mamaya na ako lumabas. Kathlysse opened the show.

"Oh. She's gorgeous!" Lady Merryl said.

I stared at Kathlysee as she hit the runway.

"Yeah. She really is..." I murmured.

"But my baby is far better!"

I giggled like a baby.

Hindi ko maalis sa screen ang tingin ko. The audience looked starstruck at her beauty. That's why I have been so skeptical about her. Sa ganda niyang 'yan ay dapat sa kanya ang spotlight. Unfortunately, I exist in her world. She could only wish.

Pagkatapos niyang rumampa ay sinalubong siya ng ibang mga model. Niyakap nila ito nang nakangiti. Everyone looked pleased to meet her.

"If I can't be your friend, no one can."

Napasinghap ako nung marinig uli ang mga salita ni Kristan. Well... that's the downside of being famous. Hindi lahat ng pumapalakpak sa 'yo ay masaya para sa 'yo.

"She's friendly huh?" Lady Merryl noticed.

That's when I stood up. I can't take watching her anymore.

Lumabas na kami ni Lady Merryl. Sinalubong ako ni Kathlysse na nakangiti.

"Nathalia!"

"Well done, Kath," I smiled at her.

"Your dress..." She looked shocked. "I get it. The dress looks perfect for you!"

I chuckled. "Of course. That's why they gave it to me."

"I know!"

"Lady Nath. You are next!"

"Good luck, Nath!"

Nginitian ko lang siya bago humilera kasama ng ibang models. Ang mga babaeng nakangiting sumalubong kanina kay Kathlysse ay hindi man lang makatingin sa akin ngayon.

"Hey. You look gorgeous," I complimented the girl in front of me.

She just smiled at me and looked away. I couldn't tell if she was stunned to see me or just shy to respond. But one thing is for sure... they are not comfortable being around me.

My fists clenched. Of course they are not. They are friends with that fake bitch Kathlysse. Baka nga nag-usap-usap ang mga ito na huwag akong pansinin.

I smirked. Let me show you how it's done.

Wearing my first dress for today's show, I stepped into the spotlight. I confidently stood in front of all the flashes of the camera before walking to the long runway.

"If I can't be your friend, no one can."

The loud claps, blinding lights, and smile they threw at me— it didn't feel enough for me. I want something just exclusively for me. Something the rest of the models won't ever get.

It seemed like the world moved upside down and I heard everyone gasp. At first, I was looking at the camera in front of me, and then it switched to the messy electrical stuff and lightings above me.

"Are you okay?" A model asked me.

As if that kicked me back to reality. Mabilis akong bumangon saka tinapos ang aking lakad. Nung makabalik ako sa backstage ay nag-aalalang mukha ng mga model ang sumalubong sa akin.

"Nathalia. Are you okay?" Kathlysse asked.

Pumasok ako sa dressing room saka kinandado ang pinto. Umupo ako sa sofa saka pinikit ang mga mata para hindi maalala ang kahihiyan na nangyari.

"Nathalia?" dinig kong tawag sa akin ni Hando sa labas. "Are you okay? Let me in!"

That was live on international TV. Alam kong lahat ngayon ay nakatutok at nakita ang pagdulas ko sa runaway. Alam kong trending na ako ngayon at pinagtatawanan.

Kinuha ko ang cell phone ko.

I need to do something, and there's only one thing I can do right now. That's to transfer everyone's attention to something else. Something... more scandalous than what happened to me.

I did it.

I finally uploaded the video.