Chapter 43: 700 Dollars

Kristan told me to take some rest before he left my room to look for Lilly. But before everything that, he caressed my cheeks and smiled at me. Now I couldn't stop feeling his cold touch on my cheeks as I imagined him smiling down at me.

What have I become as a woman?

I heard footsteps approaching so I shut my eyes and pretended to be resting. Bumukas ang pinto at bahagyang humina ang mga hakbang na tila tinitimbang ang bigat nito para hindi ako maantala.

Oh, my feels. I could feel my lips stretching on both sides for no damn reason.

The footsteps came to a halt beside my bed. He had his gaze fixed on me. No. He was staring down at me. I suddenly felt conscious, for I forgot to retouch my makeup. I just know that the mascara was all over my face for crying.

"I prepared you some drink," he said. "Mas mainam kung inumin mo muna ito. Baka sakaling hindi mo na kailanganing magpanggap na nagpapahinga."

Napasimangot ako saka minulat ang mga mata. Ang unang bumungad sa akin ay ang malamig niyang tingin at ang harapan ng buhok niyang basa.

I was right. He was staring down at me with his wet look.

"You look better now," he noticed.

I sniffed when I smelled the familiar aroma coming from the wine of glass on his hand. Tila nasabik ako nang husto kaya mabilis akong umupo para kunin ang alak sa kanya.

"Take it easy," paalala niya.

I took a sip and as soon as I tasted his blood, I almost moaned in pleasure. Mabilis kong naubos ang laman ng baso. I wanted more but didn't want him to think I missed him that much.

"How's the taste?" he asked.

"It's okay," I lied. It's the best.

Napansin kong nakabalot ng puting tela ang kanyang isang kamay. Sigurado akong wala 'yon kanina. At sigurado rin akong imposibleng sugat 'yon.

"What's that?" tanong ko tungkol doon.

"This?" He showed me his hand covered with white cloath. "Hindi na kasi mabilis humilam ang sugat ko katulad ng dati. But don't worry. It will also heal any moment."

"Damn. Really?" It had to be one of the drawbacks of being a heartless vampire.

I suddenly felt guilty for drinking his blood, despite the fact that I had not asked for it. Perhaps one glass was sufficient for the time being. Yeah. That was all for now. After all, I don't think he would still go away.

Sumandal ako sa ulunan ng kama habang nakatingin pa rin sa kanya. Kinuha niya sa akin ang baso ng alak saka nilapag sa nightstand.

"How is she?" I asked. "I mean, Lilly."

"I just fed her. Baka paliguan ko siya mamaya para makapaglaro kami. I missed her so much," nakangiti niyang tugon. Kumuha siya ng unan saka pinatong sa kanyang hita. "About Kathlysse, she's still not okay with you. But rest assured that she is not plotting any revenge against you."

"She's not that kind of woman," I said sarcastically.

"She really is not," he agreed. "How about you? How have you been, Nathalia?"

I shrugged. "I've been so busy lately. Sa sobrang busy ko ay wala na akong panahon para isipin ang ibang bagay. I even almost forgot about your existence."

"That's harsh. I have been trying my best to remember you."

"I mean, that's not my job," I smirked at him.

Oh, my feels. I was so sure that I was about to pass out earlier. But here I am, arguing with him in my most stable condition. It just felt like arguing with him was my way of regaining energy.

There was complete silence after that. Humiga sa paanan ko si Kristan, nakatingala habang nakapatong sa kanyang dibdib ang unan.

I had one question that I couldn't ask.

"Bakit hindi ka na tumutuloy sa dati mong tirahan?" tanong niya.

"Don't even talk about it."

"Why?" he asked, tilting his head toward me. "Was it because of me? Did you despise me so much that you abandoned even the house where I used to live?"

His statement was too long and bold just to be wrong.

I exhaled a sigh. "What has been done is done."

"Does this mean you've already forgiven me?" Tila nabuhayan ang kanyang boses dahil napangiti pa siya. "Are you giving me another chance, milady?"

"I don't give second chances, Kristan. If you can still stay this close to me after what you have done, that just means that whatever it is, you are yet to cross the line."

Gumapang siya sa aking hita habang nakatingin sa aking mga mata. Tinukod niya ang mga braso sa magkabila kong panig habang ilang pulgada lang ang layo ng mukha namin sa isa't isa.

"I'm not that shallow," I whispered.

"You are not." He smiled. "You were a sin that even the worst person in existence wouldn't dare to commit, for losing you was like losing your purpose. You are the purpose of my existence."

Bumaba sa kanyang labi ang tingin ko. Pinagmasdan ko ang mga 'yon habang nagsasalita siya. Everytime his upper lip touches the bottom, I wish I was in between.

"I've learned a lot while I was away..." Hinawakan niya ang baba ng ulo ko para kitain ang aking mga mata. "Ngayon ay mas nauunawaan na kita."

"Really?" My brows arched. "Kung naiintindihan mo na talaga ako ngayon, sige nga. Ano ang pinakagusto ko ngayong gawin?"

"You said that you have been so busy lately."

I nodded. "That's right."

"You must be stressed."

I gulped. "I am..."

"I know how to relieve your stress."

I bit my bottom lip.

"Tara shopping!" aniya.

Natahimik ako. Parang nablangko ang isipan ko.

What did he say?

"Can I bring Lilly with us?" Umalis na sa kama si Kristan na malawak ang ngiti. "Hindi pa siya nakapuntang mall, eh. Papaliguan ko na siya!"

Saka na siya nagmadaling lumabas ng kwarto ko.

Naiwan akong tulala, hindi makapagsalita, at tila nawalan ng malay.

Gano'n ba siya katanga?

Fuck you, Mr. Admiral!

It's my preferred stress reliever, but I'd rather be relieved in bed this time. But I didn't want to be the one who was desperate for it. I'm good with shopping for now.

Kinapa ko ang cell phone ko sa kama, pero nakalimutan ko pala itong kunin sa likod ng sasakyan ko. Bumangon ako para lumapit sa telepono.

I entered the contact number, and as soon as they picked up the call, I said, "Empty the mall. I will be there in an hour."

Nasa kalagitnaan na ako ng pag-aayos nung mapagtanto kung paano ko sasabihin kay Hestia ang tungkol kay Kristan. Ayoko namang ihalingtulad niya ako sa kanya na marupok sa lalaki. Saka hindi naman katulad ng mga naging lalaki niya si Kristan. He did nothing wrong.

I was in the mood to dress up extravagantly. Even without seeing my reflection in the mirror, I was confident that I looked better than usual in my red dress.

Kinuha ko na ang pouch ko para lumabas ng kwarto. Naabutan kong naglalakad si Kristan palabas ng kusina. Buhat niya si Lilly na nakapulang damit din.

"Isn't she the cutest?" he smiled.

"Y-yeah..." Pinasadahan ko ng tingin ang suot niya. Alam kong guwapo siya kahit na anong suotin, pero hindi man lang ba siya mag-e-effort? "How about you?"

"I'm good."

I was dressed expensively and extravagantly in my favorite red dress, while he was only wearing a plain brown leather jacket he just maybe stole from the thrift store.

"Let's go?" aya na niya sa akin.

I suddenly felt awkward dressing like this. He couldn't even match my mood!

That's not even the worst that happened that day.

Si Kristan ang nagmamaneho habang ako ay nakaupo sa tabi niya at kandong-kandong si Lilly. Halos manlumo pa ako dahil halata ang mga puting balahibo niyang dumikit sa pula kong dress.

I had to remind myself that Lilly had already once broken my heart when she failed to recognize me after she went missing. Throwing her outside the window of the car was not the wisest thing to do.

"Why are you frowning?" tanong ni Kristan.

"I forgot to bring cash."

"Hindi ka naman nagdadala no'n, hindi ba?"

"Naiwan ko rin ang cards ko."

Humalakhak siya. "I got you!"

"What?"

"Hindi ba nagkatrabaho ako? I got paid!" masaya niyang tugon.

The idea that he got paid for doing his job was obviously made him this happy. That was not something I could relate to. Throughout my modeling career, I paid little attention to my wealth. But for someone who doesn't normally earn money, that's a big deal.

I swallowed and cleared my throat. "How much did she pay you?"

"Hindi ko na binilang, pero sabi pa niya ay may bonus daw 'yon." Bumuntonghininga siya pagkatapos. "Ayoko sanang tanggapin, pero pinilit niya."

"As you should. Your service shouldn't be free. Know your worth."

"Are you proud of me?" he asked as if that's the validation he needed.

Napatikhim ako. He suddenly sounded like someone who had been craving validation. Did I even ever praise him every time he does something good?

"You did well living on your own," I said. "I had no idea you could do it, but you did it anyway. Aside from audacity, you also have guts."

We've finally made it to the mall. Walang laman ang parking lot kaya napansing kong nagtaka si Kristan. Tinanong pa na niya ako kung okay lang bang pumasok ako nang ganito lang.

"What if someone recognizes you?" he asked, frantic.

"Not when we are all alone here." Kinuha ko sa kanya ang leash ni Lilly saka na naunang naglakad sa loob.

"What? Tayo lang dalawa rito?"

"Three. Can't you count?"

Bumaba ang tingin niya kay Lilly. "That still doesn't make sense. Unless..."

I shrugged.

Pagkapasok namin ay tila abandonado ang mall na ito. Bukas ang mga ilaw, mga stalls, at stores. Pero walang tao, walang bantay, at walang guard.

"Holy shit. This is so cool!" he cursed. "Pero paano tayo magbabayad?"

Binigay ko sa kanya ang leash ni Lilly nung pumasok ako sa isang clothing store. Nung makita ko ang mga damit ay tuluyan na akong nawala sa huwisyo.

Oh, my feels.

Blood and dresses are what keeps me alive.

I've got busied looking and picking dresses that I just realized that Lilly and Kristan were not around all this time. Nakuntento naman na ako sa mga binili ko kaya nilagay ko 'yon sa isang pulang cart saka na ako lumabas ng store.

I found them inside the merry-go-round ride. Nakasakay sa laruang kabayo si Kristan habang hawak niya ang leash ni Lilly na nakaupo sa lapag.

Humalukipkip ako habang pinapanuod sila. Mukhang nahihilo na si Lilly pero hindi 'yon pansin ni Kristan na halatang tuwang-tuwa sa ginagawa.

"Nathalia!" He waved at me.

Lumapit ako sa kanila. "Nahihilo na si Lilly!"

"What? How to stop this?"

"You started it. Why would you ask me how to stop it?"

Ngumiwi ang kanyang labi. Napailing na lang ako. Para akong nagdala ng bata sa mall.

"You need to press something, I guess?" he said.

Hinawakan ko ang isang pole saka pwersahang pinigilan 'yon. Muntik pang mahulog si Kristan dahil sa biglang pagtigil. Bumaba siya saka binuhat si Lilly bago lumabas.

"That was so fun!" he exclaimed.

"Really?" napangiwi ako. "Umiikot lang naman."

He looked at me in disbelief. "Hindi ka pa nasakay riyan? It's so fun!"

Tumingin ako sa ride na sinakyan nila. Sinubukan kong hanapin kung ano ang nakakatuwa sa mahinang pag-ikot ng bagay na 'to. The design was for kids.

"You should try it!" Mahina akong tinulak ni Kristan sa loob.

"Ayoko."

"Isa lang!"

I pouted. "Fine!"

Bigla akong nangilabot nung sumakay ako sa laruan na kabayo. Masyado itong mababa kaya sumasayad sa lapag ang aking mga paa.

"You broke it!" Kristan said when he tried to press the button.

I was not into this kind of childish game, but the moment he said that, I suddenly got frustrated. Hindi ako bumaba kahit na mukhang hindi talaga iikot 'to.

Napasimangot ako.

Mayamaya ay biglang umikot ang sinasakyan ko. Paglingon ko ay nakita kong si Kristan ang mismong nagtutulak sa sinasakyan ko para umikot lang ito.

I don't remember it spinning this fast when I was watching them from afar, but Kristan turned it in a way that I might enjoy it, which I did. I was finally enjoying it.

A smile formed on my lips as I finally felt the fun part of this ride.

It was too fast that everything began to blur. All I could feel was the wind blowing on my face, the sinking feelings in my chest, and the happiness I thought was gone.

I looked around and realized the only thing that was not blurry was Kristan's face smiling at me.

We had no intention of stopping until we noticed a spark of light on the wheels beneath the ride. Kristan stopped the ride before it started a fire from spinning too fast.

I got off the ride and ran toward him. I was dizzy, and I had to hug him before I even hit the floor. Naramdaman kong niyakap niya ako pabalik.

"I told you it was fun..." he whispered.

"It was."

Pagkatapos no'n ay hinila ko si Kristan sa store dahil gusto kong bilhan din siya ng damit. Binuhat ko si Lilly habang nakasunod kami kay Kristan.

He's been looking around the store for ten minutes and still hasn't decided which one to buy. Sa mukha pa lang niya ay halatang hindi siya interesado rito.

"How do you do this?" he turned to me, confused.

"Ganito..." Kinuha ko ang isang polo shirt saka pinakita 'yon sa kanya. "Imagine yourself wearing this shirt. Imagine how it fits on your body, how people will look at you."

He just stared at me.

"Just take this," irita kong sinabi saka binigay sa kanya ang polo shirt. Lumapit pa ako sa isang long sleeve naman. "This one, too. There's a section for leather jackets. Let's go there."

I wanted him to decide for himself, but I ended up picking everything for him.

"You're really good at this," he said. "How do you do this?"

"Easy lang..." Nakangiting hinarap ko siya saka binigay sa kanya ang belt. "Ini-imagine ko kung ano ang suot mo habang katabi ako. That's how I do it."

That was the most stressful I've experienced while shopping for clothes. Kristan had no idea about fashion. He even had the audacity to tell me that fashion was not for him.

Fashion is for everyone. It doesn't have just to do with the way you dress. It's also how you stand, smile, talk, act, and walk. The way you express yourself. Everything you do involves fashion. Some may say that it's subjective, which is partly true. But some are just really bad at it.

The trend also has a significant impact on fashion. But trends don't stay long. At the end of the day, you should wear what makes you comfortable and confident.

"I don't think I have enough money for all these," nag-aalalang sabi ni Kristan habang tinutulak ang cart na puno ng mga paper bags na pinamili namin.

"Sabi mo you got me?" kunwari ay nagtatampo kong sabi habang kumakain ng ice cream.

"Ibabalik ko na lang 'yung mga akin—"

Hinawakan ko ang kamay niyang nakahawak sa cart pigilan siya. Napalingon siya sa akin.

"I can pay for all of these..." I said, licking the strawberry ice cream while staring at him. "And you can repay me in another way."

"In what way?"

I put the ice cream on his lips as I leaned forward to lick it while still staring at him. Naramdaman kong dumausdos sa bewang ko ang kanyang kamay at hinila ako palapit sa kanya.

"I don't think I can repay you for something I've wanted to do as well," he said quietly, moving his face closer to mine. "It just feels completely wrong."

"If you really want something, nothing is wrong."

He bit his bottom lip. Hinila niya ako sa pinakamalapit na kama. Hinawakan niya ang batok ko saka ako siniil ng halik habang dahan-dahan na hinihiga sa kama.

I intentionally put the ice cream on his leather jacket.

"Oops..." I smirked.

He chuckled and took it off.

The price of this bed caught my eye.

He was about to kiss me again, but I put my palms on his bare chest to stop him.

"What?" he asked, frustrated.

"This is 700 dollars, sir..." I winked.

He harshly grabbed my hands and put them on both sides. Napatingala ako nung isiksik niya ang kanyang mukha sa aking leeg.

"Just include it on my debt to you," he whispered.