Chapter 28: Confrontation

Looking at his expression, I am sure he didn't get what I meant by my offer. Neither do I. But I am certain that I want him to say yes. I badly want him to accept my offer, no matter how obscured it is.

"A home..." he paused and blew a breath. "You sure offering me a home?"

I nodded. "I am."

"Okay..." he nodded, but I could still say he didn't completely get it. "But... what is home to you, Lady Nathalia?"

"Home..." I grasped for words. "Is with me."

His lips slightly parted. Hindi makapaniwalang tiningnan niya ako saka mahinang tumawa. Tinanaw niya sina Erikson at Hestia na mukhang nakalayo na bago muling humarap sa akin.

"Maybe this is just one of those days." He exhaled and coolly slid his hands inside the pocket of his leather jacket. "Do you need some rest, milady?"

I felt embarrassed by his question. Pakiramdam ko ay inaasar na lang niya ako. Really? That's all? After I said the foulest words ever? Is he even aware of how risky it is for someone like me to say such? I bet no. Of course, he doesn't.

But I am not backing out with my words. Not now that I am certain, he's not becoming something to me. He's now something to me. But he's dumb.

"Shall we go now?" he offered.

I shook my head and stood still. "Just say yes first."

"I can't say yes about something I am uncertain about," he groaned and slightly pouted his lips. "Plus, you are asking here, right? I am not sure."

"Ang arte mo. Kung ayaw mo, e 'di huwag!"

I walked past him and immediately created a huge distance between us. When I noticed that he had difficulty catching up to my speed, I slowed down.

"You are fast..." He walked beside me. "I'm sorry, but I don't really understand."

He didn't get a response from me. Kung hindi rin niya ako sasagutin, wala akong nakikitang rason para kausapin ko pa siya. Ang simple lang naman ng sinabi ko.

He cleared his throat. "I'm sorry. But I need a few more details about this... uhm... home. Hindi naman kasi puwedeng pumayag ako agad."

"Bold of you to assume that slaves have options."

"Oh?"

"You are aware that..." Tumigil ako sa paglalakad para harapin siya. He was smiling while I was struggling. What a perfect contrast. "The slaves are not permanent companions, aren't you?"

He slowly nodded. "Maybe? I just found out now."

"Now you know."

"Uhmm..." Tumagilid ang ulo niya saka siya tumango kahit hindi na naman niya ako naintindihan. Nagseryoso ang mukha niya. "So... what's really your point?"

"You have been a good servant to me, Kristan," diretsong sagot ko sa seryosong boses din. "You are becoming better as time passes by."

He awkwardly smiled.

Lumunok ako. "Gusto kong ako lang ang pagsisilbihan mo. Gusto kong sa akin ka pa rin uuwi. Sa akin ka lang uuwi. Sa akin lagi."

I said it—another foul words.

I'm not sure why Oscar let go of Celeste, but one thing is sure. I won't do that to Kristan.

I am happy with him. I want him.

I said it before, and I will say it again. I am not like my family. I have my own decisions. My principles. My own life to live.

I am bound to no one.

I live for freedom.

"I will not allow anyone to get the best of you when I struggled with your worst." That would be the biggest insult ever.

He chuckled. "So... you are claiming me officially?"

"Ayaw mo ba?"

"Ikaw lang naman talaga ang pagsisilbihan ko. Sa 'yo lang din ako uuwi. Lagi..." sagot niya nang nakangiti. "Sa 'yo lang ako."

I looked up at the dark sky when it started to rain. As much as I love the snow, the rain will always give me the level of serotonin that can reach my deep layers. I love the gloomy feeling it brings.

The dark sky got covered by a black leather covering my head and halting the drop of rain.

Kristan was looking at me intently. The water was dripping on his hair and face.

"Is this right?" he asked in a hoarse voice.

We were too close, but the weather made everything more constricted. It felt like we were standing on the cliffside and against the wild wind. There's no other way but forward and fall.

I am falling into something I haven't ventured into yet.

"I don't think this is right," he whispered.

"Do you?"

He held my face and slowly moved his face closer. Niyapos niya ang pisngi ko pababa sa aking baba at saka hinawakan ang mga labi ko.

"What is not right, Kristan?"

"To wish for the impossible..." he whispered as he kissed my forehead. "To wish that I was more than who I am." He kissed the tip of my nose. "To wish that I was originally born as a vampire."

He finally claimed my lips as he wrapped the jacket on my back, pulling me closer to him. I put my hand on his nape and deepened our kiss.

No. I would say that it was not right for him to covet that kind of life. But I would also say that it was understandable for him to wish for that. I knew how frustrating it was to want something so bad, but you were bounded not to get it.

"To wish that I was originally born as a vampire," I recalled his words in my head.

That was his sweetest words. Hindi ko inisip na gugustuhin niya ang buhay na binigay ko sa kanya. He has every reason to hate me and my kind, but he choce to embrace it.

We spent a moment under the rain, kissing and touching each other. It felt so good to be wrong.

We had finally decided to go back. The supposed to be a ten-minute drive back to The Mansion became half an hour of walk. It's been a while since I stretched my legs that far. By the time we had reached the front of The Mansion, my legs were already numbing.

"You okay?" Kristan asked.

I pouted and shook my head.

Napansin niyang nakahawak ako sa legs ko kaya nilapitan niya ako. Inalis niya ang kamay kong nakahawak sa legs ko saka niya 'yon sinuri. Nakiliti pa ako nong pasadahan niya ng kamay.

I almost smiled but a memory of him caressing Kathlysse's sprained foot popped into my head and interrupted the emotion building up. Ganito rin ang ginawa niya sa kanya. Hinawakan nang maingat ang paa, sinuri... at binuhat sa sofa.

"Let's go inside—"

"Ouch!" Napaupo ako, pero hindi ko nadama ang sahig dahil mabilis niya akong nasalo. Tumitig ako sa kanyang mukha. "Oh, my gosh. Ang sakit, Kristan. I can't walk anymore."

I am a model, but I can do acting, too.

"Bubuhatin na lang kita."

It was hard to suppress a smile, but I didn't want him to feel weird. My legs were really hurting, but I could still walk. But why would I walk if he could just carry me?

He carefully carried me in his arms. I wrapped my arms around his neck while he supported my back and legs. My face was too close to him, so I just looked away.

"Do you feel comfortable?" he asked.

Napatingin ako sa kanya. Ngayon na maging siya ay nakatingin din sa akin ay napagtanto kong sobrang lapit pala ng mga mukha namin. Kaunting galaw ko lang ay mahahalikan ko siya.

Err— Fine. That was an exaggerated description of our situation because I would still have to purse my lips just to kiss him, but damn. I was fighting the urge, and looking away was just the only way.

I nodded. "How about you?"

"Of course." He smiled. "There's nothing more comfortable than being this close to you."

It was against my will to look at him, but I found myself in that situation— staring and feeling how close we were. Our hearts were beating rapidly against our chests. But he doesn't have his heart. The heart that was beating was my heart alone.

From his alluring eyes, I looked down at his lips. I love any shade of red, but the color of his lips was my most preferred shade. It was seductive, inviting, and... just mine.

Pinalaya ko ang isang braso mula sa pagkakalingkis sa kanyang leeg para mahawakan ang kanyang mga basang labi. Napakagat ako ng labi nung hinalikan niya ang daliri ko.

He just knew how to get me.

"How many girls have you kissed?" I asked in my low and breathy voice.

That unnecessary question made me mad. Although he doesn't remember anything, I still don't want to know the answer. I will just pretend he has not kissed a girl before me.

He laughed. "For all I know, only you."

Tumango na lang ako at iniba ang direksyon ng tingin. Tinanaw ko ang mansion sa hindi kalayuan. Napukaw sa isang direksyon ang atensyon ko.

I felt a lump in my throat when I saw my father leaning over the railing of his room, sipping on his wine, and staring at us with a blank expression.

He still terrifies me like no other.

"Would you like me to carry you up to your room?" Kristan asked.

"N-no..." I stuttered.

"Just on the entrance? Fine."

I looked elsewhere. Wala naman kaming ginagawang masama ni Kristan, pero pakiramdam ko ay nahuli kami sa isang malaking krimen. He was just casually carrying me on his arms as my legs were sore.

My father could see right through everyone. Hindi niya kailangang pasukin ang isipan mo para mabasa kung ano ang susunod mong hakbang. That's how he manipulates things just to go in his favor.

That's also why he has everyone in the palm of his hand, including my brothers. But not me. Matagal na akong tumiwalag sa kanyang pagkakahawak.

I hate being manipulated so much. He knows that.

Sa bungad ay binaba na ako ni Kristan. Naabutan naming pababa na ng hagdan si Papa. Sinenyasan ko naman si Kristan na mauna na sa itaas. Nagkasalubong sila ni Papa sa paikid na hagdan kaya yumuko sa kanya si Kristan bago tuluyang umakyat.

"Father..." I swallowed when he stopped in front of me.

Napasinghap ako nung bigla niya akong sinampal. Sa sobrang lakas no'n ay napaatras ako. Nakita 'yon ni Oscar na nakatayo sa pinakataas ng hagdan. Napansin kong gusto niyang bumaba pero mas pinili niyang umatras at manatili sa kanyang pwesto.

"I always thought you were a brilliant woman," his voice was as heavy as his slap. "Among my children, I didn't expect it to be you."

Napayuko si Oscar saka na umalis.

I stood still, fists clenched. Nakayuko ako at hindi makaharap kay papa. I knew that among us, I was the rebellious one. I even broke more rules than Brixton did in his life.

I am willing to break more.

"You know how much I love you, Nathalia. I gave you everything you asked for. Freedom for whatever you want to be. Anything. Everything. I am willing to give more if that will make you happy. Just not this."

Nangilid ang luha sa aking mga mata. Gano'n pa man ay hindi ako nakapagsalita. Punong-puno ng emosyon ang dibdib ko.

"Nathalia..." Naramdaman kong hinawakan ni Papa ang balikat ko. Saka niya ako niyakap at hinaplos sa likod. "I am just protecting you."

That's when my tears fell down my cheek. I sobbed as he hugged me tighter. I knew that he was right. The path I am taking is not an easy path nor something I should go through.

"You know that you are my favorite one..." he whispered as he kissed the tip of my head. "I don't want to see you hurt or worse... be like this."

I just nodded.

"I'm sorry..." he kissed my cheek before letting me go.

Mabilis akong umakyat sa itaas ng hagdan nang hindi lumilingon pabalik. Naabutan kong nakatayo sa gilid ng pinto ko si Oscar na nakayuko.

"Where's Kristan?" I asked.

Madiin kong pinunasan ang luha sa pisngi ko. Gosh. I hate crying so much. Pakiramdam ko ay nauubusan ako ng dugo sa katawan at kumukulubot ang balat ko.

It took him seconds to respond, "Pinagamit ko muna sa kanya ang kwarto ni Brixton. Doon siya nagbanlaw. Doon na rin siya kukuha ng damit."

I sensed that he wanted to say more, but he held back, as usual.

Tumango naman ako. Inambahan niya akong lalapitan pero humakbang ako paatras saka umiling sa kanya. Suminghap ako.

"If you were going to pursue the failed attempt of our father." I shook my head and held the doorknob. Before I went inside, I looked at my brother for the last time. "Don't mention anything to Brixton or anyone."

I locked the door and took off my clothes. Pumasok ako sa shower room at agad na nagbabad sa tubig. Malamig ang tubig na minsan ay nababahiran ng maligamgam.

I fucking hate it when I have to consider the rules before pursuing what I want. It frustrates me and makes me eager to go for it more. I might tend to break the rules often, but I never turned my back on the consequences.

Napahawak ako sa pisngi ko. Alam kong ang sampal na 'yon ay para malinawan ako. Nalinawan naman ako. Nalinawan akong walang saysay ang pagbabalik ko rito. Nalinawan ako sa nararamdaman ko.

Kahit papaano ay bumuti ang pakiramdam ko. Nagbibihis na ako nung pumasok ng kwarto ko si Hestia. She was wearing a pastle yellow dress.

"What do you think?" She spun around, showing me all the angles of her dress. "I love it so much. But I want to know your opinion."

I finished putting on sunscreen first before I gave her my opinion, "Have you seen Kristan?"

Natigilan siya saka sumimangot.

"Yeah. Kasama kanina ni Oscar." Umupo siya sa kama ko saka inayos ang sandals niyang mukhang maluwag. "So... how about my dress?"

"My father?"

She frowned. "No. Hindi ko siya nakita. Maganda naman dress ko, 'no?"

I sighed. Gutom na rin ako kaya tumayo na ako. Sa tingin ko rin naman ay umalis na si Papa. Umaga na rin kaya malamang na may ginagawa na naman siya.

"Nathalia. How about my dress?" pagalit na tanong ni Hestia.

"I cannot give my opinion to a yellow dress, Hestia. Do you want me to say that it looks awful?"

"What? You just hate the color!"

"Exactly! Saan ka ba pupunta?"

I noticed that my hair was now longer than my preferred length. Maybe I will have a haircut when I come back to New York City. I am also getting tired of the ash-gray color.

"I have a date..." Tila kinilig pa siya.

Natigilan ako saka humarap sa kanya. This place was just such a terrible place to look for a date. Sino naman kaya ang weird na lalaking nagustuhan niya?

"Not Erikson..." Inunahan na niya ako. "Mas lalong hindi si Resty."

"Si Mr. Billy?" bulalas ko.

"No!" she screeched. "Kadiri ka naman, Nathalia. Hindi naman gano'n ka-weird ang taste ko sa mga lalaki 'no. This one is something else."

Kung mandiri naman siya kay Mr. Billy parang hindi mas nakakadiri ang mga naging boyfriends niya.

"Whatever. Tara na. Gutom na ako."

Ngumiwi siya. "It's a date, Nathalia. Hindi ba dapat kami lang?"

Hinila ko na siya kaya wala na siyang nagawa. Ayoko ring kumain dito dahil baka biglang dumating si Oscar o di kaya'y si Papa. Aalis na rin kami mamaya. Mas mabuting hindi ko na lang sila makausap pa.

I swear, if possible, I will never come back here.

Naghintay kami ni Hestia sa labas. Mayamaya ay dumating na ang isang puting sasakyan. Nauna na akong pumasok sa driver's seat.

"Nathalia?"

My jaw dropped. "Braun?"

Bumaling ako kay Hestia na sumakay sa back seat. Nakasimangot pa siya dahil ako ang nasa tabi ng ka-date niya.

So... the man she was calling something else was another trash? Why am I still surprised? Minsan iniisip ko ngang nati-trip na lang si Hestia, eh.

"I didn't know you wanted to date me," he smirked at me. "What's up?"

Gosh. Nakakadiri.

"Makikikain lang ako. Drive now."

Gusto kong batukan si Hestia. Hindi ko talaga maintindihan ang tipo niya sa mga lalaki. Kung hindi bastos na walang pera, bastos naman na lasenggero.

I regret that I sat beside the driver's seat. Ininda ko ang amoy niya hanggang sa makarating kami sa restaurant. Para akong ilang taong natulog sa coffin nung makalabas ako ng sasakyan. It was a breath of fresh air.

I already endured being with Braun in his car for almost an hour, but I had to endure another hour of their corny conversations that didn't even make sense.

"You look so beautiful, Hestia."

"Thirteen..." I mumbled.

"What?" Bruan asked.

I smiled at him. "That was the thirteenth time you said that."

Gano'n pa man ay pangiti-ngiti pa rin si Hestia.

I really don't like this guy. He's such a flirt. I bet natikman na niya lahat ng babae sa bar. Isusuka ko talaga si Hestia kapag nalaman kong natikman din siya ng lalaking 'to.

Pagkatapos no'n ay nagpahatid na ako sa mansion. I need to look for Kristan. Ilang oras na rin kasi no'ng nagkita kami. I don't trust Oscar.

"But... I have booked us a hotel," pangungulit ni Braun kay Hestia.

"We have an early flight tonight," ani Hestia.

"Ihahatid naman kita agad—"

"She doesn't want to fuck you, Braun. Hindi ba malinaw 'yon?" pagsingit ko sa usapan nila. "Hindi ka ba nahihiyang na pinipilit mo siya?"

"I treated you!"

Oh, my feels.

"I can buy that restaurant, including you and your family," I scoffed. "Magkano ba ang nagastos mo at dodoblehin ko 'yan?"

I was ready to throw a punch if he still insisted.

"Fine. See you around, user bitches."

"Nathalia..." Pinigilan ako ni Hestia nung susugurin ko na ang antipatikong lalaki. Nginisian niya pa kami bago sumakay sa sasakyan niya at umalis.

I looked at my best friend. Mukha namang nagsisisi siyang sumama sa lalaking 'yon. Itatakwil ko talaga siya kapag pinatulan niya ang lalaking 'yon.

It was already afternoon when we came back to The Mansion. Ang balak ko ay maligo muna bago hanapin si Kristan pero nabigla ako no'ng maabutan ko siya sa kwarto ko. Pinapakain niya si Lilly.

"Hey..." I greeted him.

Umupo ako para hawakan si Lilly na kumakain. Sinulyapan ko si Kristan. Yakap niya ang kanyang mga tuhod kung saan nakapatong ang baba ng kanyang ulo.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Sa halip na sagutin ay tumayo siya saka umupo sa kama ko. Yumuko siya at hindi pa rin nagsalita kaya kinabahan na ako. Bihira siyang manahimik at kapag nanahimik siya ay alam kong may nangyari.

I sat beside him. "What happened?"

"I-I couldn't stop it..."

"What do you mean?"

He looked at me. Parang nanghina ako nong makita ang kanyang mga malungkot na mata. May bahid 'yon ng pangamba.

"I'm sorry..." he whispered.

I don't think I will get the answer from him. So, I stormed out of my room and hurriedly went into Oscar's room. But he wasn't there.

Did he go back here all by himself?

That really means something went wrong!

Why is he sorry for? What is he terrified of?

Pagkalabas ko ng kwarto ni Oscar ay pababa na ako ng hagdan nung makasalubong ang dalawang lalaking hindi ko kilala. Masama ang kutob ko sa kanila.

I blocked their way and confronted them.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

As soon as I recognized their uniform, I gasped and shuddered. I thought I saw my life flash before my eyes for a moment. My hands were shaking as I spread them on both sides and stopped them from taking the stairs.

"You can't go any further." I shook my head.

"We have a duty, milady..." one of them said.

"No."

"Nathalia..." My father's voice roared from up the stairs. He looked down at me and shook his head, looking more disappointed. "Let them do their jobs. Do not interfere."

"No!" I screamed as I abruptly appeared in front of my father. He didn't flinch, didn't even move. Nothing scares him. "Tell me, Father. What did he do?"

"I confronted a human..."

My attention darted at Kristan. Umiling siya sa akin na parang sinasabi na hayaan na lang sila. Hayaan na lang silang kunin siya.

"I broke his bike, showed him my fangs, and scared him away..." Napayuko siya matapos sabihin 'yon. "I'm sorry, milady. I failed you."

No. That didn't feel right.

Ang sabi niya ay hindi niya na-control ang sarili niya. Kristan has faced a lot of humans now. It was so unlikely of him to lose control of himself unless...

I turned to my father, which triggered my tears as realization struck me. It was the only valid reason I could think of. More valid than his love for me.

"Y-you compelled him to do that..." I whispered.

"Nathalia!" Napapikit ako sandali at halos mabingi sa pagsigaw ni Papa. "You cannot save him anymore. Let the rules work."

I was right. My father lured Kristan to do that so he could commit a crime. So that he could get rid of him... and act like he was my savior.

I smiled at him. "I used to look up to you, Father. But as time passed by, I realized that you are the worst. You are selfish and greedy of power."

"How dare you—"

"Slap me again, and you will lose your daughter right here!" I clenched my fists. "I will leave this clan and never come back anymore. You will never see me again."

His eyes turned bloody red as he struggled to hold back his anger. The legendary furious eyes of the king that could bring death to anyone were looking straight at me.

Not like I care enough.

"Please don't hurt her..." Napatingin ako kay Kristan na nakaluhod na sa harapan namin. "I will take all the consequences of my actions. She has nothing to do with my recklessness. I am just her slave."

I wiped my tears away as I faced my father. His eyes were back to normal and calm again. But I couldn't control the looming resentment inside me for what he did.

"Kristan was innocent and you know that, Father. You just used him. You controlled him. Therefore, you cannot punish him."

"I have the power to punish anyone—"

"And I have the power to turn my back on you and this fucking clan! Try me, Father. If you can hurt me like this, I can also forget about your existence!"

Tinalikuran ko na siya para puntahan si Kristan. Inalalayan ko siyang makatayo na ginawa naman niya. Hindi lang siya makatingin sa akin.

I faced my father for the last time.

"Spare his life and the life of the human involved. That's my last request, Father."