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The past shapes the present.
MJ
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The girl whose brain I literally fried, will live. My ability is getting better and her being alive is proof of it. She will make a good soldier and she won't be brainless, which is an improvement. So many people have paid the price for my recovery, but since I am the only one able to tame the wolf inside the host, their fate is inevitable. Had my husband be here things would be different, but he is not. The survivors from our realm must remain hidden whatever the cost. I rub my front line. Each improvement takes me closer to the day, I will be reunited with my family. I look at the footage of my two kids on my way back while the driver takes me back.

I sigh,
"Julie and Luc."

It's been a little over three months since I last saw them in the flesh and 7 since I saw Annie. It was just before her birthday. They've grown, but I couldn't be at peace with myself knowing that by remaining I was to harm them. My episodes have been erratic and impossible to predict as time passes by. I couldn't keep them safe when I was the menace. This was the only choice.

I kept my promise in a way, they are safe, there are no tutors, only Mom and them. It isn't me, but a staff wearing my face with a spell. She stays with them full time and is the mother I can't be for now.

"I am too unstable." 

I had wished for Annie to be with them, but she proved to be a clever girl and noticed the switch between her mom's. What a failure, I failed her. Neuronally and physically I am not the same, I am weaker after each episode and need close attention. My crises are killing me slowly and painfully, but I can't lose hope. Each crises is the reminder that he is alive and fighting. The mate bond is a curse and a gift sharing every joys, but also the hardships. One day, my husband will find his way home and we will find peace again.

In the screen, I see Richard entering the house. He kisses them on their forehead and Isabella2 hugs him welcoming him back. Joy and sorrow builds inside me at the same time, this was the best outcome.

They play the happy family eating and laughing. Walking in by a secret door, I get to my room. Richard doesn't admit it but he is growing fond of my kids. Somehow this is an opportunity for him, he is filling the void left by his family.

The one Tom destroyed, as Richard likes to remind me and complain, but I know this is just his way of pushing aside the guilt of losing his mate. He just can't bear the guilt and pushed the blame on his kid. Since the event, he has been making Tom suffer, as often as he can. Sometimes I wonder if he forgets he is still his child.

I lay back on my chair as I look at the screen.

◁◁ ◁◁   (Flashback) ◁◁ ◁◁

Tomas was 17 just like Annie is now. I came to find him in a ravaged house and a soulless mate. The total opposite of how it was when Riana was there. Richard's mate was taken. He asked me not to erase Tom's memories, I was only to switch a few. It surprised me at first, but I owed him so much. It was his child after all and he knew best or so I thought. Time thought me that I was so very wrong.

Still the other dimension needed to remain a secret and has seen too much and his mother's kidnapping was but a drop of a bigger wave. This was a tragedy that couldn't be avoided since his security team was incomplete due to Tom's unplanned absence. The remaining Security was outnumbered turning the evening into a tragedy.

In the end, I complied, Tom was to believe that a group of investors were against his company and with his father's refusal to join their mafia, they decided to retaliate ending with his mother's and sister's disappearance.

As a result, Tom hoped for a ransom for weeks until the bodies were found. Richard used it as punishment, he wanted him to suffer as much as he was suffering, but I had to cut it short. I couldn't spend my nights letting him feel the same anguish I was feeling. Tom had suffered enough, he was a child and needed closure. I was the one to bring the news to him. It was one of the hardest things I had to do.

Later, in a morgue stood a men, young Tom and me. I explained everything, but Tom's hope wouldn't quiver.

"No. Dad, it can't be them. Please," he said his voice breaking into a plea. He was shaking while looking back and forth between the corpses and his dad. Even with a visual, a part of him refused to believe. Was it the wolf inside him telling him that it was just a spell? The thought hunted me, but he was too young and it was unlikely that his wolf persona would appear at such age.

The father unmoved looked at his son with deadly eyes.
"Its them, look at them and remember, this is all your fault. It should be you in that coffin."

▷▷▷▷ (Time elapse) ▷▷

"You have mourned enough, it is time for you to become a man," Richard added after a few months of mourning. "Isa suggested sending you to a training camp. There you will make yourself useful."

He got closer to him and pulled him by the neck. I could see his wolf asking to come out, willing to destroy his son's flesh as retaliation for the past events. The hair on his back was growing, but Richard manage to prevent it from harming him even more.  "You will protect our community even if it means giving your life in exchange," he roared throwing him to a wall.

Hearing the sound of Tom's body colliding with the wall, I crossed over the open door and gently guided Richard to the side.

"Come, Tom." He looked like a scared cat. He was shivering with fear.

He had bruises over his body and face. I was told he was being abused, but I didn't know how bad it was. I came because I was aware he asked for healing potions often, so I gave Richard an alternative.

Poor kid. This was his only salvation.

He didn't make eye contact with me, as if his soul had left him, but he wasn't frightened by Richard's aura yet he looked frail and tired. Slowly I moved to him and grabbed his hand. I didn't bother looking for clothes, I only knew that he needed to get out now.

To my surprise Tom followed until he froze next to his dad's side. Richard slyly growled at his son, not even bothering to give him an eye.

Switching my body, I shielded him from his alpha aura and I pressed Richard's shoulder until his head sank.

"Go" he said in a breath. " I don't know how long I can keep my wolf on check, even if it is you." Then he moved to the window.

Tom finally complied and followed me out of his prison, his room. The red moon was now disappearing behind the edge of the forest behind his house. I could only imagine what occurred in the previous hours before my arrival. Richard's wolf was at its worst, meaning he failed to compel Tom into acknowledging his Wolven genetics. Tom had reached the age months ago, but refused the change. I knew that for a fact since his father wouldn't stop complaining about his son's weakness. I on the other hand just knew how smart it was since it protected his soul from his father. A thing he wouldn't be able to escape had he chosen that path.

Once in the car, he didn't break into cries as I expected him to do. He was dead in his eyes with no light in them, he wasn't like the kid that use to fool around my kids.

"You know your father is a werewolf." He nodded without looking. "Your mother was a werewolf too." His breathing stopped for a second.
He turned and looked me in the eyes but added nothing.

"We don't know what your ability is. You see, It wasn't your mother's wish for you to find out. She wanted a human life for you, but your dad was against it. I sealed all your magical traits when tou were a child as a middle ground between your parents." He gulped and his eyes became wide open at this statement. "Now we need to find out what you are. I have to unseal your magical heritage." I said as slowly and calmly as I could.

" You mean that I am a werewolf? I won't be able to fight it back after you rid me from the spell?" He asked in a fright.

Pressing his knee with my hand, I tried to reassure him. "We don't know it yet. Your mom was a witch before she became a werewolf. We don't know which one you will keep."

"If I become a werewolf, kill me." He added with a broken voice.

The conversation brought memories of my own, I rubbed my head pushing them aside. "let's see what you are first."

▷▷ (Time forward)▷▷

In the end, Tomas wasn't a werewolf, he fought nails and tooth against it and never became one. He made his choice and buried the wolf within him. That choice was his to make and no one could force it on him.

In fact, he rejected the idea of the supernatural all together, refusing to learn magic to his dismay. This school was meant to teach how to use all magical or supernatural abilities and Richard wouldn't let him go so easily. Everything was getting worse, I had worsen his physical pain. Under his father's watch, he was a target for the wolfs at the station.

Every time I came, he was getting a beating and he took it without a flinch. He had no purpose and welcomed every beating as if he had deserved them. What was I to do. At that rate, he would die in a matter of time. He was often humiliated and his food was thrown.

Desperate to save him, I sent him to the archives. He was to learn the history of our world. It was classified, but I needed time for him to find a new goal in life and I needed to keep him away from the training grounds. I owed that much to his mom.

Riana helped me when my mate was taken and I was in pain. I couldn't let her kid like this.

▷▷ (Time elapse) ▷▷

Next time I came back, he was fighting back.

His gifts were amazingly unique. His teleportation was sloppy and since he was often matched to higher ranked opponents he was likely doomed to fail.

A 20 year old Alpha charged him, changing form in a blink of an eye. Philippe was a promising subject, his morphing habilitation was quicker with every change. This time, he switched to his wolf mid air just when Tom was about to catch him by the neck. Tomas wasn't as fast, failed to teleport himself away and ended on the ground. Jumping on his rear paws, he charged for shoulder impaling his canines deep. Tomas barely pressed a scream tightening his jaw.

As Philip kept pulling Tomas ripping the flesh and bones, I couldn't remain in my sit any longer.
"Enough! Aren't you seeing that he can't fight anymore why are you dragging this?"

Even now, Richard still wanted Tom to suffer for his mother's disappearance. In the end, Richard stopped the fight. The teen had no choice, he needed to learn and fast if he was to survive. I wasn't happy with it, but Richard is his dad after all and I had already overstepped the boundaries in that family.

The next time I saw him there, he had gained control over his gift and used it as an advantage.

Again, Tomas got paired with Philippe after several wind. Looking at him with deadly eyes, I could only wonder what was pushing him to beat Tomas so willingly.  A command from a stronger alpha wouldn't give the host such a trill. No, there seemed to be a hallway story behind.

When the signal sounded, Philippe was the first to attack on a hand to hand combat. His straight being fuelled by his wolf, he kicked Tomas multiple times, but Tomas never flinched and did as much damage without his magic. Tomas finally moved around Philippe's waist and knocked a sensitive spot earning an animalistic roar from his assailant.

The wolf took over, teleporting away, Tomas held his ground on both of his feet and the next time he moved his arms, a blade and a shield appeared ready to be used. Dodging major attacks, his stamina was lowering with every move. Spitting blood, the wolf licked his canines showing them wide for everyone to see.

Philip was charging again, Tomas took a second before running to face him. As the wolf jumped to bite him, Tom threw his shield over the wolf's head. Too high in the air, the beast didn't cared until Tomas disappeared and reappeared just above him were his shield was, Tomas fell on top of the wolf and impaled his blade on Philippe's wolf back with all his might. The wolf attempted to roll and crush his rider but the beast found a carpet below him. It screamed in agony.

Tomas made a flip on the ground and got up safe and sound. Everyone applauded. The wolf whined out of pain, Tomas got to him, took back his blade and began to set the animal free revealing a web of wires and silver stings.

When Philippe turned human, he met his eyes for the first time and made a little reverence. Soon the pack acknowledge him too. The alpha had surrendered himself to Toma's wits. It was a unlikely sight.

Richard wasn't as impressed as I was, when Tom turned to meet his eye, but he had already left.

▷▷(Time elapse)▷▷

After a little while I arranged a visit to the facility. Creatures seem to respect him, he had earned his place among our society, the hard way.

His eyes though, they looked dead, he had no spark.

I had to fix him.

I convinced Richard to grant his son access to different missions, to reinstate him to our supernatural world. Maybe then he would find his spark back.

▷▷ (Time elapse) ▷▷

He became ruthless, he was A good soldier. His eyes were not dead anymore. Actually, they had anger in them.

He completed every mission. Even those I pleaded Richard not to send him. Like picking up unstable kids, sending people to the disposable facility. He was even asked to be there to restrain people while I performed the memory's modification procedure. He witnessed all the unglamorous side of the magical world.

I expected him to react, but he never said a thing, he never questioned a thing.

Yet his eyes did. He was coming back.

▷▷(Time elapse) ▷▷

Then there was Annie's kidnapping.

We went back to the sacred point. The moon light beamed into the altar. The time and weather was perfect.

The psalms vibrated around me, filling me with magic. I scanned her memories with the sacred water within the bowl carved on top of the altar.

She was taken to the other dimension for the second time and she transitioned into a werewolf. Davon was behind it all, my worst nightmare became a reality.

Luckily, she got away. Hiding, until creatures attacked her in the morning letting the wolf out. It saved her. My comrades found her, exhausted from the shift. They drugged her and took her back to me.

Opening my eyes, I can vividly see the events from that night.

Her wolf was strong. It kept  fighting against my magic. I pressed forward, erasing each one of them. Annie being drugged, there was only the wolf and me.

The mind cage I created for her, was unsealed due to Annie's fright. That allowed her to morphed into a werewolf overtaking Annie's body like a parasite. Otherwise she couldn't get out, she could only address her, the inhaler was there for that purpose, to keep her quiet. Now, all I has to do was to push her back inside long enough to lock it all.

"My husband was so stubborn!  It was his fault! He made her strong," I say out loud in my empty room.

Seeing the wolf's memories as I fought to weaken her by modifying details in her head, it was clear that the creature was a devious one taking advantage of my broken soul.

It chose to show me my husband talking to her wolf in the meadows by using his wolf.
It send me into an inner turmoil, I was too late to discover her presence. Her wolf forged a bond to her soul and protected by the bond to my husband it was now a hazardous task to take back her will to live.

The worst was that he hid her! He hid the wolf from me.
My magic weakened as I dwell on that image.

He knew I never wished for them to be supernatural only to be tracked and chased like animals by Davon.

A second image blew in my head as I weld my powers to her, knowing my longing for my husband, she showed him leaving with a black back pack and dressed in black. Me silently crying again, he was leaving for another mission.

Tears began to fall, when it involved only him, I didn't oppose him. He kept going back and forward. Bringing more people, spreading the word, exposing himself and exposing us to be caught.

"The hero syndrome. That is why he was taken, and I was left behind to make the impossible choice.'

Now the beast inside my precious daughter needed to be gone.

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