Dear diary-

Today I adopted a baby Flip Phone. You know, those old phones that literally haven't been seen since the time dinosaurs were everywhere? Yea, so I felt bad for the little thing; so alone, so sad.

Anyways, I decided to name him Lspqirjnf. I tried Breast feeding Lspqirjnf but I just don't have the boobies, T~T. So I kidnapped Haku and am currently keeping her In my basement. I wonder how long it will be until Teto notices...eh, Flip phones only take 600 hours and 35 minutes to mature, so I'm fine.

I'm going to work on teaching Lspqirjnf how to swim. If he's going to be surfing the World Wide Web, he has to know how to swim. Wait, I don't think Flip Phones can access the Internet...Nevermind then, I'll teach him how to "Flip the Bird" at people, or should I say, "Flip the case"? Ha, I'm hysterical.

-Neru