Renata wasn't familiar with what death felt like as she had only heard many stories from people who never experienced it for themselves. She didn't know whether it was going to painful or whether it was going to be like falling asleep, but the mercy of the Killing Curse was that it was over so quickly. She had tried to fight her mother, but it seemed as though her best efforts weren't enough because right after the jagged arm movement, all she could see was a flash of green before her body gave way.

She had to admit, it was rather peaceful because the pain was suddenly gone and she didn't even feel herself hit the floor. Instead, all she was met was the darkness and silence that seemed to wrap her in a comforting blanket, letting her know that the fight was over. To think that her own mother would have pulled the Killing Curse on her, she was truly a fool not to see it coming. Alcina had been deemed insane and she was willing to go to any lengths to get her way. But seeing as Renata was not going to cave in, Alcina finally figured that she was going to be too much trouble.

For that, Renata was somewhat relieved, thankful that she didn't have to be bound by a vow to remain prisoner to her mother's torturous ways. She was also relieved that all the pain she had been fighting over when it came to pushing through the curse was suddenly lifted. She couldn't feel anything, not her fingers, nor her toes, but at the same time, she didn't feel pain either, at least, not physically.

Mentally though, she was devastated and she hated herself for not putting up a better fight because all she could see as she fell before the darkness overcame, was the look of pure horror on James' expression. Then she realised, that she had failed him, and not only him, she failed Adelmo, Harry, Sirius, and all the others that were counting on her to bring the fight to an end with her as the victor.

She thought she could do it, she thought she had the upper hand in the fight, even in the final moments where Alcina was fighting her back. But Renata had been caught off guard and it all ended so abruptly that she didn't get a chance to try anything again. To make matters worse, despite being wrapped in the comfort of the darkness and relieved of the pain, she found herself alone and she hated it. She tried calling out but no sound came out of her mouth as she just drifted along.

Was this the afterlife? The one that her mother and father promised would be so beautiful as long as she did "good" things with her life? Perhaps it was the afterlife, but not the one her parents spoke about, maybe she hadn't been good enough to reach that one. Perhaps it was her destiny to spend the rest of eternity in darkness, just drifting along like a lost thought.

I'm sorry, she whispered in her head, taking the time to apologise to all the people that she had let down. She was so sorry that James had to be the one to witness her fall, especially since they didn't even properly get to reconcile the way she wanted to. All she had wanted to do since the time she recognised him again was hold onto him with the plans of never letting go.

She wanted to go back with him to London, stay in his flat, leave out the days of flirtatious teasing in the kitchen, cuddling up at night, taking turns reading Harry bedtime stories, take Harry to the park or host more playdates. She didn't just want to go back to London, she wanted to go back to the family that she had discovered and never wanted to lose.

Adelmo would be there, him and Sirius holding hands, not worried about any judgement coming their way because it wouldn't matter as long as they had each other. They had fought like hell to be with each other, what difference was it going to make with someone making a snide comment or sending a dirty look their way?

Remus would come back from his work and he would be in awe of the tale that happened while he was gone. But he would be thankful that everyone was alright and he would embrace James and Sirius, vowing that nothing would ever come between them again. And then Sirius and Remus would take the time to apologise to each other properly for what happened, bringing the brotherly bond back to its former glory.

And Molly and Augusta would be there, with the Weasley children and Neville, bringing together the group into a full circle where everyone could always count on each other when they were in need. Harry would grow up with Neville and Ron as his best friends, sharing the same relationship that James had with Remus and Sirius, they would be his brothers.

Renata still hoped that the majority of those things would happen even in her absence. She knew that James was going to be sad, she could see it briefly on his face as he watched her fall. But she believed that he could get through it all, he was such a strong soul that if he could do it once, he could do it again.

She was going to miss him though, she was going to miss everything about him, from his messy hair and the mischievous grin to the way he laughed. The way he made her laugh by taking things so literally when he was drunk to how he acted as a gentleman, never rushing Renata or wanting to push her out of her comfort zone. The way he loved her so tenderly, she didn't need him to say it, she felt loved by him and that also offered her some peace. That she had experienced love, not in the sense of family, she had gotten that from Adelmo.

But now she knew how it felt to be loved as a sister, to be loved as a lover, and to be loved as a mother.

"Mummy?"

Harry's familiar voice called out to her and suddenly, she was given the ability to move as she sat up and saw little Harry standing before her. He had his hand out for her, a toy in his other hand and a bright smile on his face as he greeted her.

"Go plaaaay?"

He turned his head to look over his shoulder as if he could see something that Renata couldn't. But when he looked back at her, Renata gave a nod of her head as she wiped away the tears that had already formed as she came to the conclusion of what she was facing.

"Yes, Harry, we can go play. We have all the time in the world now to go play."

Pushing herself up, she grabbed Harry's hand and the two of them started walking, with Harry leading the way to go on an adventure. Her parents had been wrong about many things, but they were right about one thing :

The afterlife was nice.

For a moment, James was stuck in place, whether it was by the forces of a spell that had hit him or the amount of shock that had overwhelmed him in a heartbeat, he couldn't bring himself to move right away. He only could watch as Renata's body fell limp to the floor, lifeless, and without any sort of struggle as her arms had released their hold around her mother. It was as if the world around him had come to a full stop and he didn't know how to react. Renata couldn't be dead, not after the fight she had put up, not after she had outsmarted her mother in so many ways. Not after coming so close to having her actual freedom away from poisoned minds that only wanted to bring her harm.

No, it wasn't supposed to end that way.

James didn't even realising he had been yelling as he couldn't even hear himself for the longest time, but eventually, his own cries of pain resonated in his ears and he could suddenly feel the tears that had already streamed down his face. He had reacted too slow, he had been quick on his feet, and his delay in trying to help Renata had failed her as she ended up paying the ultimate price for everything.

No, it wasn't supposed to be like that.

Finally able to feel his legs once more, James bolted over to where Renata was, shoving Alcina out of the way and pulling Renata into his arms. He waited for the moment where she would wrap her arms around him and tell him that everything was alright, but even so, as he leaned his head down and pressed his ear against her chest, he didn't even get the sound of her heartbeat. Her eyes were closed and she looked incredibly pale, but at the same time, she looked peaceful.

He had failed, he had failed again and it ended in the same results with the woman he loved making the ultimate sacrifice in the end. What was there even to say at the time as James found himself spiralling back into the darkness where the guilt started to perch itself back on the familiar spot of his shoulders. It was all his fault, he kept telling himself. He had just come to terms about Lily's death not being his fault, but how was he supposed to explain Renata's?

How was he supposed to explain that he was right there and had not been able to think fast enough to take a plan of action that would have saved her life? Once again, it was a result of him not thinking things through properly and not acting quick enough.

No, that wasn't supposed to happen.

Since the moment he found her again in Italy, James had so many plans running through his head that he didn't even know where to begin. He was going to apologise until the end of time for telling her that she wasn't Harry's mother and remind her that she was a wonderful mother to Harry since the moment they had all met in the park. He was also going to tell her that he loved her because if he was capable of telling it to Dr Mullins, he was more than ready to tell it to her.

But he wasn't going to get that chance, was he? No, because he didn't have any time left and now all of his plans were ruined. He had been so ready to return home with Renata and have her greet Harry first so that Harry could see that she was home. However, it seemed Harry was going to have to go through his own sort of grieving process all over again. What was James supposed to tell him when Harry asked for Renata like he had been the past several days? What was he supposed to do when he caught Harry looking around for her but she didn't show up?

Renata was supposed to return with him and she was going to scoop Harry into her arms, after all, she had fought so hard and in so many ways, it was all for Harry. It was Harry that gave her so much strength to keep fighting, even during times where most people would have given in. And now, she wasn't going to be able to return to him. Just how Lily had sacrificed herself for the sake of seeing Harry live on and be happy, in return, she didn't get a chance to see him grow either.

No, they were supposed to be happy.

"I'm so sorry, Ren," he whispered into her hair as he held her close, " I'm so sorry. I tried and it wasn't good enough. It never seems to be good enough and I don't know because I try so hard and...and...please don't go, Ren. I'm so sorry. It's my fault you ended back here in the first place. I know I already told you sorry, but I don't think I'll ever stop being sorry for driving you away in the first place. And I'm sorry I was too late to help you and I'm sorry I didn't come up with a better plan. But please, I'm begging you, don't leave me. Don't leave us, we need you..we want you...we love you. I love you, I love you so much. You should have heard everything I told Dr Mullins about you. She wants to meet you...I want you to meet her...Ren?"

It should have worked.

Renata didn't respond, she didn't move, she did nothing but remain in James' arms as he held her. Unable to speak to her anymore as he began sobbing halfway through his pleas to get her to wake up, James just buried his face into her hair and remained in place.

Meanwhile, chaos was unfolding around him and Renata as he had left Sirius and Adelmo with the fight. Certainly not on purpose, but since James had severely wounded Davide and Sirius had left Gian with a mangled arm, it left Adelmo with an easier job to finally take the two henchmen out. He stunned both of them several times before tying them up with Sirius' assistance.

As much as Sirius wanted to go over and help Adelmo, he knew James needed him, by the sounds of the sobbing, he knew his brother had to come first. He had heard the Killing Curse be called out and he had heard James screaming, but he couldn't see anything behind the sofa where Alcina and Renata had collapsed before. Running over, Adelmo wasn't far behind him, attempting to move as fast as he could given the circumstances of what he had just been through.

"She's gone, Sirius," James looked up at him as Sirius approached, " she's gone. I was too late again, I was too late. I failed her and...and...it's all my fault. This is all my fault. If I hadn't said those things to her, if I didn't drive her away, she would have been okay. She would be okay right now. What have I done?"

Lowering himself to James' side, Sirius placed his hand on the man's shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze, which he used in order to hold his own tears back. He looked down at Renata as James had her loosely in his hold so he could look down at her face. It was odd to see her in such a still state, it was like she was sleeping, but knowing she wasn't made it less peaceful. James continued sobbing, apologising to Renata over and over, and Sirius wished it was a moment where a kiss would do the trick to wake her up but it didn't seem likely.

"What do we do?" James finally asked looking back at Sirius. "What do we do now? We can't fix this but I don't want to let her go. She can't leave me, she can't leave us. She can't leave Harry-"

"James, I-"

"What do we do?!"

Before Sirius could answer his friend's desperate and frantic cries with an answer, it was Adelmo, who spoke and gave James the answer he requested.

"We need to get to the hospital right now, " he said making his way over to where they were on the floor, " that's what we need to do before it's too late."

With a bewildered look, James looked at Adelmo as if the man had sprouted ten heads from his arse as part of a magical act. What was he talking about? Before it was too late? It was too late unless he was talking about that vile woman that was lying on the floor across the way from them. If that was the case, James was in no rush to get Alcina to the hospital, she could rot in place for all he cared.

She had shown no mercy with unleashing the Killing Curse on her own daughter, someone like her didn't deserve to be saved.

However, Adelmo ignored him for a moment as he reached out and touched the side of Renata's head before he got on his hands and knees to press his ear against her chest. James was about to tell him that she didn't have a heartbeat and that she wasn't breathing, but Adelmo quickly pushed himself up.

"Renata wasn't hit with the Killing Curse," he said as he motioned for James and Sirius to get up, " she was."

He pointed in the direction of his mother with a disgusted look on his face before turning back to them. "During the struggle, Renata must have been able to turn the wand back on her just as the curse was called out. Renata has a heartbeat but it's faint, her body must have shut itself down to relieve her of the pain. Just like earlier, what you witnessed and I thought it to be a seizure, you would be surprised with how the human body can work in order to protect itself. She's not responding to pain or anything in her environment."

"So what does that mean?!" James asked as he was up on his feet in an instant with Renata cradled in his arms. "Does it mean that she's going to live?"

Adelmo seemed unsure of that and didn't want to claim anything right away, a solemn expression taking to his face as he looked down at his little sister. He had to turn away for a few seconds to gather himself as it pained him more than the Cruciatus Curse itself to see her in such a state.

"I don't know. If I'm not mistaken, her body might have entered a comatose state, she needs medical attention now. Come on, we don't have much time to waste, every second is crucial right now."