||Vishu||

"Her smile, those rosy lips, is my Nirvana"

Nandini holds her head low, her dark curls almost in condact with the floor as Radhika Chettathi (elder sister; usually referred to elder brother's wife) nags her right and left for her audacity.

It's comical to watch Nadini's countenance as it dominate pride in clouting me. It still hurts, but the whole incident was impulsive, my urges were beyond my control when I had her that close. But the feel of absolute contentment when my unscrupulous lips tainted those rosy cheeks, was undescribable, a gentle lash won't deprive it's worth.

"It was the mosquito" I finally defend her, having enough of the hounding.

Chettatthi's (brother's wife's) naggings come to a halt. Nandini shoot daggers at me for deceiving my actions, but Chettathi's (elder sister's) guise radiates bewilder. I dismiss them both by a nod. When Nandini leaves to heat the cold kanji (rice porridge) after the ruckus, Chettathi stops me behind.

"Achan (father), wants to see you"

I procced to his room, on Chettathi's (brother's wife; literally means sister) instruction. A solemn conversation with my Achan (father) was something I disregarded since my arrival. There was no aim in it. These talks only erected frustration in me, that concluded in severe physical injury.

His room pervaded the aroma of the Ayurveda medications he was on. Almost wrapped like a corpse in blankets and scarfs to keep him warm, propped against the bed frame was my Achan (father), he looked small, weak, shrunk, grey and all other tragedies. My loathe towards him and his sons slowly surrendered seeing him in devastation.

"Vishu" he recognise, opening his creased eyes. "Va, ente aduth vannu eriku (come, sit next to me)"

Obediently, I seat myself on the bed next to him. Wariness fill my mind, a feeling of protection, I never felt towards him is evoked. He caresses my head and slowly pats it. As he endearing take in my appearance.

"How are you, Acha? (father?)" the question packed in concern slip out my mouth.

His face beams with a smile. "Better that you are here"

That's a lie.

"Forgive me for all the immorality I did towards you, mone (son)" he breathes out "It was selfish and ruthless, Are you planning to leave soon?"

Yes I am.

"It's too late for forgiveness, Acha (father)" I respond looking away. "Ettanmar (elder brothers) won't be fond of my stay, I don't belong here, I've not thought about when, but I should leave"

Achan (father) sighs at my answer. "I pray you change your mind"

After tugging him confortabley in blankets I walked out of his room.

The more I stay, the less hospitable my ettanmar (elder brother) would be. Everyone in this household would be eagerly waiting for my departure gracing them with peace.

I stroll around the village, taking in the tranquility for the last time. Who knows when I'd return, maybe for onam (a festival in kerala). The rural villages, muddy poudles, I'd miss all those.

Advancing to the temple, I see Nandini there, impatiently waiting for someone just like that day. Her beauty doesn't fail to draw attention, few drunk men approach her with the usual tease. It's a shame that people get drunk during the day as well.

I can see her fiercely insulting them with mockery plastered on that sun-kissed countenance, it produces a smile on mine. Bold enough for a village girl. But soon those men indulge in physical outbreak.

"Leave her alone, Chettanmare (brothers)" I call out, walking towards them pinning up my Mundhu (Vesti).

"Who are you?"

"None of your concern" I retort. "You may leave this pretty lady alone"

My words wake aggression in them. But one of them put an end to their tease and desperse the gang revealing my identity of being a Nayanar. Only times I'm proud being a Nayanar.

"You should've entered the temple when they approached" I advise evidently establishing my pride in recusing the attitude maid girl.

She nods, her Jhimuki kammal (Jhumka earing) dangling. "Yeah"

Such attitude to gratify me. "Who were you waiting for though Leela?"

No answer. Her silence makes me persistent, I reiterate my query.

"I was waiting for the commotion to die" she answers being forced. "Though legally we are allowed to enter a temple, I can't stand their eyes" 

(Nandini belongs to a lower caste; Ezhava, they were not permitted in the temple in the olden days, when the constitution was established all these norms and vicious social norms were eradicated. But these practices and prejudice attitudes still prevailed in the society.)

Without much thought I grab her hand and lead her into the temple. She fights my hold, but slowly in the presence of people she starts confiding in my grasp.

Commotion of the people inside sets uneasiness in her. It affects my action, I halt infront of Garbhagriha (inner sanctuary that houses the deity).

"It's freaking 21st century, Nandini" I almost yell making her flinch. "Nobody cares"

Her eyes wander around the temple, unable to place a judging eye. Defeat consumes her countenance. Turning her to face the diety, I let loose of my mundu (Vesti) that I pinned in earlier, it falls to the length of my leg.

"You'll be fine, Nandini" my words spark a smile on her face.

That stretched pigmented lips takes my breath away. Her smile, that solacing, taunting chaps almost makes me drool.

Pujari arives from the chamber and hands her the prasadam (religious offering) in a palm lead, while I was still fawning over those rosy lips. He looks over at me with a raised eyebrow,but I was too busy fawning to be effected by his expressions.

She pivot to face me, and I forcefully shut my gawk. Standing on her toes she reaches my forehead and apply the chandanum (sandalwood paste) from the palm leaf, with her ring finger.

My heart beats in my ear having her that close to me. I hold my breath soaking myself in the moment. She smiles again killing me and strolls away as I watch her half saree dusting the temple ground.

Oh Devi (diety), that girl just stole my heart.

This feeling, I think I'm in love with the attitude girl. My decision is made, I'm not leaving this place, I'm not leaving her.

_________________________

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