"Miraa.. how long until she comes back?" Pink haired boy whined at the bar of the guild. His head hanging low and a pout visible on his face.

White haired mage glanced at him with a sympathetic look, smiling weakly.

"I already told you, Natsu. It's a week long job and she's only been away for four days." She said, continuing to wash dishes.

"I know but it feels like eternity.." he sulked.

"Thanks anyway, Mira. I'll head home. See ya tomorrow!" He waved her goodbye and walked outside alongside Happy.

He had an odd gait. It was slightly lurching as he went, perhaps he was leaning too far forwards, it was hard to tell. It had the effect of making him stand out in a crowd, and in a good way.

As they reached their destination he twisted the doorknob open.

"Hey, Natsu.. how come we're at Lucy's since she's not here?" Blue cat looked up at his best friend.

"Why not? We can snoop around for a bit." He laughed as the cat jumped up with excitement.

- time skip -

"Natsu! Look, look! I found Lucy's erotic panties!" Happy yelled while swirling them around in his tiny paw.

He noticed there was no reaction from the dragon slayer what so ever. He glanced over and noticed him reading something on the piece of paper.

"What's that?"

"O-Oh.. It's nothing, don't worry about it!" Natsu spoke as he scratched the back of his head.

"C'mon Happy, it's already dark outside, we should head home."

-

"Mira, listen. Turns out this job is gonna take a while longer." Blonde mage spoke from the lacrima while all kinds of noises came from the background.

"Lucy... are you fighting someone right now?" White haired mage asked while concerned expression smattered all over her face.

"Maybe. Anyway, I need you tell the others not to expect me in two days. Can you do that for me?" She asked while coughing out some blood.

"Yes, yes of course. Don't worry about it. And, Lucy?"

"Huh?"

"Please be careful."

"Always."

-

"Mira!!! Are there some news from Luce?" Fire mage yelled as he and his blue partner entered the guild hall.

Mira heard him, oh so very well. But she kept her look down, not knowing how to tell the already impatient guy that he has to wait even more.

Natsu noticed white mages look and became even more on the edge. His anticipation was a nervous kind of energy. It tingled through him like electrical sparks on the way to the ground, gathering in his toes.

"She called this morning.. um.. the mission is gonna take a while longer." She spoke sadly, knowing that's the last thing the boy wanted to hear.

"W-What..? Did she say how long?" He panicked a bit.

"No.. unfortunately." She sighed.

"Mira, I can't let this happen, I gotta go and get her! She might be in trouble!" Natsu yelled, it was a bit louder than he had expected it to be.

"I don't think that's a good idea. I know you're worried about her, believe me, I am too. But imagine how she would feel if you just came there and wrecked everything up. She needed to go on this job by herself. She told me herself that she wanted to prove to all of us she is capable of taking care of herself." She explained.

"But doesn't she understand that we all know that already?! I wouldn't go there to mess this up for her, I want to help her! Be there for her!" He spoke back.

"I understand how you feel. Let's handle this another way. You can go there if she's not back at the end of next week. Sound fair?"

"No! She could be... hurt by then." As he said those words it was as if he had a lump in his throat, he didn't even want to think of a scenarios where he couldn't help her.

"Natsu... don't do this for me or you, do it for her." White haired mage said calmly, causing the boy to hesitantly nod.

After the Fire mage left the guild hall he went to his house. For the first time in a while he took a route that would take longer, and he didn't mind. He might have seemed like a simple and straight forward guy, but no one really knew what was going on in his head.

All the what if's he imagined, all the scenarios and all the things that would never be spoken if Lucy didn't return.

- a week later -

"Still nothing..?" He lowered his head down to the bar table, sulking. Mira looked to the side almost shamefully.

"Actually-" White haired mage was interrupted by the master's voice echoing through.

"Attention, please. I have news in regard of our guild mate Lucy Heartfilia. Yesterday she announced to Mira that she successfully fulfilled the job she was assigned for." The old man said as he stood at the first floor.

The smile on Natsu's face grew as this must've meant she was already on her way back home. But it soon faded as the master continued.

"Unfortunately, while doing so, she didn't... make it. We lost an important person in our lives, our friend and one of my children, yesterday July 1st, what would've been her 19th birthday. We will hold the ceremony in her honor tomorrow. I beg of you to go home now and rest..." he finished as few tears rolled down his face.

The guild fell silent. They felt as if he'd been speaking a language they couldn't understand, that moment his words stopped was the moment their hearts broke.

Some didn't say a word, some bursted into tears and some sobbed violently. It was obvious no one was left phlegmatic to the situation.

Natsu's gaze lowered, his hands were shaking uncontrollably. The pain crushed him - it left him incapable of anything. It left him broken - in and out. The tears wouldn't roll down, and the screams wouldn't escape past his quivering lips.

The boy slowly turned around and walked away. Erza and Gray tried to stop him but he scared them away with his voice alone. They thought it would be for the best if they left him alone for now.

Death wasn't kind. Natsu knew that. It snatched where it could, taking people who were far too young, far too good. It didn't pretend to care, it didn't pretend to distinguish.

The hooded vale of death had hung over the world for a long time, always threatening. It had never touched the Fire mage quite so close before. Death had ripped away a part of him that day. The part most important to him.

He sat in her apartment just staring for hours. The silence was painful, when he sat down and couldn't hear a noise. He could hear the delayed ticking of the clock that hangs on the far side of the room, and the beating of his pulse against his skin. His face was sunken and haunted, his mind cold and empty.

The boy slowly glanced over at Lucy's nightstand, he noticed a picture of her, himself and Happy. They were all hugging and happy then.

His heart shattered completely at that moment, the anger rose inside of him. He punched into the wall so many times he lost count. He acted out of despair, despair he's never felt to this extent before.

The feeling of him not being there to save her, or at least help her was tearing his soul apart. He sunk down to his knees and let out a long and agonizing scream.

After a while his sobs turned into sniffles. He didn't have any tears left to cry. Now, all that was left was the emptiness in his heart, the numbness pounding his brain, the salty tears that flowed unchecked from his eyes, the shear nothingness that now took hold of his soul threatened to engulf him entirely.

"I'm so sorry, Luce..." he stuttered, his voice full of guilt that weighed him down.

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i'm back!! i missed you! i missed writing!! oh it feels so good to be back!

thank you all for being so patient lol

hope you liked this one!