Judge: Monal

For: Desi Lihaaz 2019

Cover and Title: How will the combination of the two reflect upon the plot of your story?

The cover is simple and elegant, however eye pleasing it doesn't give any hints on what the book must be about especially since the title is in Hindi. As an Indian, I may be able to derive some clues from cover and title but do keep in mind, any reader who may not know Hindi, they may find it mildly aloof. I would highly suggest the writer to use the 'story details'/ summary section to may be provide the definition of Deewani. It would help broaden the audience pool.

Summary/Prologue and Chapter 1

The summary is quite short; to the point. It would be definitely helpful to help more to your summary; especially some twist or turn that makes your plot unique otherwise, it sounds like any other historical love story out there. Think of what may appeal to your potential reader that will make then think, 'aha, this is something different. I want to read it right away' and not store it in their reading list for future.

Excellent strat! With the way summary is shaped, I honestly didn't expect such detailed introductions. The chapter mainly focuses on introducing the two main leads and I absolutely love how the writer's words fluently paints their contrasting life. Safa's life with her background and Aahil's present as the king. Even though the writer does not focus on his past as much as she did with Safa's it is easy to paint his life as a whole so kudos for that!

Writing level: How proficient are you with your language and grammar?

Even though I understand what I am reading, the writing level is quite poor. Not trying to be brutal but just grammatical errors makes me cringe and it's not just rare instances. It's almost every other sentence. Also, simple italicizing if Hindi words is sufficient. Adding bold format to your writing diminishes the quality.

Indian Culture: Whether it is old-school, contemporary or 500 years in future, how well does your story spread the theme: Being Indian.

Considering this is historical royal fiction, the book has rich culture reflecting through every chapter! It's not just about Indian culture it's goes in depth as the author takes Islam within India, letting the reader know how the culture in history is heavily influenced with the religion one follows.

Chapters 2/3/4

The chapters are slow paced, in a manner that the main leads get a first glance of each other with the end of 4th chapter. That does not mean, the author has written filler chapters up till that point. This book without a doubt has more to provide than just romance, with the way each scene unfolds a little about the history, characters and potions future influencing triggers. I sure am excited to read more!

Plot Delivery: How well do you balance the genre and element you are trying to address?

There is tremendous work to be done on plot delivery. Where the plot hold potential the delivery lacks. Such as, the short scenes jumping back and forth between narration and character thoughts. Maintain a balance where each scene provides both the narration and feelings/thoughts that go along with that narration. Some scenes takes up majority of the chapter and some chapters have multiple scenes which break apart with in 1-2 short paragraphs. This, dear author, is what makes a reader cringe, not having a solid moment to disappear our reader minds into.

Element: How well does your story reflect the element of your choosing, no matter the overall genre?

As for the element, History Repeated is nailed to almost near perfection. I say "near" perfection because I would like for the novel to explore more than just prostitution in the times of Mughal history. Writer tried to add Eid celebration or court proceedings but did not focus on it. It was more of a touch and go and as I said this interacts with plot delivery. There is a lot more readers can be exposed to and educated upon if the writer goes deeper with the narration.

Chapters 5/6

This is almost hilarious because usually I am complaining about the slow pace of the novel. With Deewani, I am about to say the opposite. Everything is going by too fast. Almost as if the writer is giving us a lengthy summary of the novel. Please, slow down just a little and give your readers a moment to enjoy the chapters. I must have stated this before, there is a lot of potential to the plot so work on it, play with it and add moments. For example, there are rarely any character interactions shown. You can play with your characters a little!