John coughed and turned on the radio to keep himself up. Taylor and him had left their house for a few minutes already, and they were now in the car, heading for Doctor Maylor's office. On the driver's seat, Taylor was holding her x-rays, carefully resting in a sleeve, on her knees. She was watching the landscape passing by, trying not to think about what the results could be. She wanted to tell John about how nervous she was, but she knew that it was worse for him. He did not need more pressure.

The car stopped at traffic lights, and John stretched out his arm to rest his hand on Taylor's, anxiously looking at her. She smiled tenderly and kissed his cheek, patting his shoulder.

“Don't worry, my love, everything's going to be alright. There's no need to worry.”

“I hope you're right.”

“I am.”

Taylor smiled sweetly but winced a bit, feeling her pain slowly waking up. John sighed and kept driving in the streets of London, even more nervous than before. As he finally reached the doctor's office, he parked the car in front of it. They both got out of the car, and Taylor made sure that she took her x-ray with her. John led her to the front door, keeping it open for her.

They got in the waiting room, and saw that nobody was there. As soon as they sat, a man appeared, with a white coat covering a blue shirt and black trousers. His hair was short and black, and some white hairs were growing. His eyes were green, and his jaw was square. He looked very strict at first, but as he recognised John, he smiled politely.

“Good morning, Mr. Deacon! You're late!”

“I'm sorry, sir, I fell asleep this morning. Let me introduce to you my wife, Taylor.”

The doctor's eyes moved on to her and he smiled even more widely, probably wanting to reassure her. He stepped forward and stretched out his arm, which she shook.

“Nice to meet you, Mrs Deacon. I am Dr. Maylor.”

“Nice to meet you, sir.”

The doctor waved at them to follow him through the corridor. They reached the door of his surgery. When they entered, they saw a long wooden desk with a few piles of paper, pens here and there, a calendar, a frame, and a book about anatomy. Behind it was a big painting of an old American diner, which made Taylor smile lightly. The room was divided in two: the office, where they were, and the auscultation room right next to it. The two were only separated by a space in the wall, instead of a door or a curtain.

Taylor and John sat on the two chairs before the desk, behind which Doctor Maylor obviously sat. The doctor took his Anatomy book and put it into one of his drawers, taking out a note from it, which he put on the desk. He cleared his throat, and let his hands meet on the wood. His smile was still there, and he looked at his two visitors.

“It's weird to see that nobody's there today” John broke the silence.

“I wasn't supposed to work today, honestly. But when you called me yesterday, I told myself that I could do an effort. The surgery's closed, but not for you.”

“Thank you very much” Taylor shyly stuttered. “I know that you're the only doctor John really trusts, and it's a relief to know that it's you who's going to take care of me.”

“No need to thank me, madam, Mr. Deacon is an adorable man, isn't he? I know his family as well, so... They're like mine!”

John chuckled and looked down at his knees, nervously waiting for the problem to be mentioned. Taylor sat up a bit, crossing her legs and wincing, handing the x-ray to the doctor.

“I guess John told you on the phone about my problem.”

“He did.”

“Here's the x-ray the doctors in Japan did, so you can have a look.”

“First, I'm going to ask you a few questions. On the note, right here under my hands, I have every symptom Mr. Deacon told me about on the phone. I would like you to describe every detail of your situation, mmh?”

“Sure.”

“First of all, do you remember your weight before your wedding?”

“Around sixty kilos.”

“And do you know your weight now?”

“No, I didn't think about weighing myself.”

“Let's do that. Did you eat this morning?”

“Yes.”

“When?”

“Around eleven.”

“Alright. Don't pay a lot of attention to the result, then, it'll be quite... approximate. Follow me to the auscultation room.”

Taylor nodded and followed Doctor Maylor to the auscultation room, throwing worried looks at John from time to time. The doctor showed her a scales, and she removed her shoes, standing up on it. She stood still, closing her eyes, fearing the result.

“Fifty-three kilos? This is a huge loss in so little time!” Doctor Maylor exclaimed, surprised. “Do you eat more or less than you're used to?”

“Uh...”

She tried to remember it, but could not. Her mind was full of thoughts, but none were about food. They were away, in fact. Seeing that she could not find an answer, John cleared his throat and did.

“Less.”

“Alright. Can you please sit on the chair, Mrs Deacon?”

“Sure. But please, call me Taylor, I would be way less nervous if you did.”

Doctor Maylor laughed lightly and removed the cardigan she was wearing, carefully folding it and bringing it to John, who pressed it against his heart. Taylor sat on the auscultation chair, sighing. The doctor took a stethoscope and listened to her heartbeat, frowning as he focused on it. Taylor breathed by her mouth like she was asked to, and stared at the ceiling. The doctor coughed and removed the cold stethoscope from her skin.

“Lie on your back, please.”

Taylor obeyed without a word and turned her head to John. She was looking at him like a terrified puppy, and so was he. But at the same time, he was falling asleep, still exhausted as he did not rest that much. The doctor pulled up her t-shirt to her bra, freeing her stomach. He palpated it, adding more pressure at some points, waiting for her reactions. She could not stop quivering when he did that, a bit surprised. But she did not feel pain at all.

“Alright, now, lie on your stomach.”

She nodded and moved, wincing again, biting her lip to avoid moaning in pain. She crossed her arms and buried her face in them, waiting for the doctor's examination to continue. Doctor Maylor pressed some points on her spine, lower and lower; then, he reached her waist and let his fingers run on her kidneys spots. He pressed them on each, making her quiver harder and moan loudly. He frowned and palpated the space with his thumbs, and Taylor bit her wrist, feeling tears of pain rolling down her cheeks.

“There's something in one of your kidneys. It must be big, because it's a bit swollen inside. You can sit up, let me help you.”

The doctor stretched out his hand and helped her up, taking a tissue and wiping her tears away. He lightly palpated her shoulder, before checking her temperature, and her mouth and throat. Then, she stood up from the chair, feeling a bit numb again. The doctor helped her walk to her seat, where she was welcomed by John, who wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

Doctor Maylor sat behind the desk and took the sleeve that the couple brought. He opened it, took the x-ray and disappeared from a moment with it. Taylor rested her hand on John's shoulder, sobbing silently. He kissed her hair, holding her against him.

“It's over, my dear, it's over.”

“This hurts like mad.”

“Don't worry, love, he'll give you the good pills to calm the pain. You'll feel way better, I promise. You'll feel better.”

Taylor nodded weakly, taking a tissue and blowing her nose. She threw it in the paper basket, before drying her eyes. John kissed her lips tenderly, stroking her cheek. The door of the office opened, and the doctor appeared, closing it behind him. He walked back to his desk and sat behind it, clearing his throat.

“It looks like a cyst. It is quite large, and it looks hard to remove. We still can try. What you're going to do is going to the hospital. Go to the Royal Marsden Hospital. Here is the name of the doctor you must meet.”

Doctor Maylor scribbled something on a sheet of paper, followed by the name of the hospital.

“I'm going to prescribe you several examinations that you must do this week. This is quite urgent, otherwise your state is going to get worse. Then, the doctor I'm recommending you wil ldecide if your cyst will be surgically removed or not.”

“Is it possible to do all that today?” Taylor asked. “I want all this to end quickly.”

“I understand. It's possible. I'll call my colleague once you're gone, and tell him to leave a space in his schedule for you.”

John nervously grabbed Taylor's hand. She tenderly stroked the back of his hand with her thumb, looking at him with a smile.

“Here is the prescription. I could ask you more questions, but my colleague will ask you the same ones, and I don't think that you want to do the parrot.”

“Thank you, sir. Can I still take the painkillers the doctors in Japan gave me?”

“Show me the box.”

Taylor nodded and rummaged through her handbag, taking out the box of pills, on whose label it was written in Japanese and in English. Doctor Maylor frowned and read it entirely, before pouting.

“You can. But not more than two per day. They're quite strong, and if you take more of those, you can get an overdose. Did you take some today?”

“No.”

“Don't take them now, wait for my colleague to tell you. He must see where it hurts and all, and taking painkillers may distort the verdict. And you mustn't eat.”

“Alright.”

John grabbed his wallet and paid the doctor, taking back the x-ray and the prescription. The couple stood up, shook Doctor Maylor's hand, and got out of his surgery. Once they got outside, they walked hand in hand to the car. They got in it, and John immediately started up the car, driving away from the surgery, heading for the Royal Marsden Hospital.

Taylor and John did not say a word at all until they reached the hospital. Each of them was anxious because of what Doctor Maylor said. It was actually serious.

When John parked in front of the Royal Marsden Hospital, he cut the engine and kept his hands on the steering wheel, staring into space. Taylor frowned and noticed he was pale. She did not really know what to do, taken aback by his sudden expression. She lightly quivered, as he finally opened his mouth to speak, but he closed it almost immediately. His lips started to tremble, as he looked down at his hands.

“John...”

Taylor's voice got stuck in her voice. As for John, his shoulders were moving up and down, and she immediately understood what was going on. She undid her safety belt and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him close to her. His shivering hands searched for her hair and back, and when they reached their goal, they held on to it. John was loudly sobbing on Taylor's shoulder, his face buried in the fabric of her coat. She held her tears, too busy comforting her beloved one. She stroked his hair and rocked him tenderly.

“Don't cry, sweetheart” she whispered “the doctor said it's possible to remove the cyst, it's not that serious.”

“He also said it would be hard to remove it! I don't want to lose you, Taylor, I don't want to! What am I going to be without you?”

“John, John, you won't lose me. It's only a cyst! And if they have to remove one of my kydneys, well it's fine. You can still live with one kidney left.”

“I can't even imagine a life where you wouldn't be” he sobbed harder. “I was actually born when we met, I don't even remember how my life was before, and I don't care, I don't want my life to change! I want you every single day of it!”

Taylor shook her head and rubbed his arm tenderly, kissing the top of his head and whispering how much she loved him. After a while, he sat up and sniffed, wiping off his tears and apologising to Taylor. She leant in and pressed her lips against his, kissing him with all the love she could gather. He placed his hands on her cheeks, burying his fingers in her hair.

When John pulled away, he yawned lightly, covering his mouth with his hand. Taylor stroked his hand and cocked her head on the side.

“You really need some rest, treasure” she said “don't you want to go back home and have a nap? I will call you as soon as my examinations are over. And if you don't answer, which I can understand, I'll call Roger, mmh?”

“I want to be near you.”

“But you're going to fall asleep. You won't make it. I'd prefer you to stay home, and actually, it even worries me to know that you're going to drive home. But that would be better.”

“I can rest at the hospital.”

“John, you need a quiet place. Here you'll get disturbed all the time.”

Seeing his sad, pouting expression, she sighed and kissed his cheek, pressing her forehead against it.

“Don't believe that I don't want you near me, you know I do. It's just that you haven't slept a whole night for so long.”

“I slept one hour this morning.”

“This isn't enough, and you know that. Don't worry, I'll tell you everything when I get home, mmh? I'll call you, or Roger. I have his number, he gave it to me.”

“Roger's at the band's appointment.”

“Oh, right. Well, I'll call you. And don't force yourself to stay awake because of my call. I can wait until you wake up. Or I can take the bus.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, darling. I am.”

John sighed and nodded. He tenderly pressed his lips against hers.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Taylor.”

Taylor smiled at him and poked the tip of his nose, before getting out of the car, with her handbag and the x-ray just in case. She closed the door and waved at John, who waved back before driving away from the parking lot.

She entered the hospital and waited at the reception, behind four other patients. When she reached it, ten minutes later, she asked for the doctor recommended by Maylor. The secretary showed her the way and gave her a form to fill in, with basic information about herself. She walked in the corridors leading to the right department.

She sat in one of the many chairs of the corridor, filling in the form. When she did it, she waited, waited, waited, worrying for John. She hoped he would not have an accident on the road, as he often took a nosedive while driving.

A doctor came up to the secretary office and looked at the names. He put on glasses and frowned, reading the names of the list. Then, he looked up at the few patients sitting in the corridor.

“Mrs Taylor Deacon?”

“It's me.”

“Good afternoon, madam. I'm Doctor Campbell.”

“Nice to meet you, sir. It's Doctor Maylor who sent me.”

“I know, he called me.”

The doctor smiled and led her to his surgery, before closing the door behind him. She sat at a desk, pressing her handbag against her like a cuddly toy. She looked at him nervously, as he sat in front of her.

“Well. Doctor Maylor told me that you had something looking like a cyst in your kidneys. Is that right?”

“Yes.”

“Do you have x-rays?”

“Oh, I forgot it in the car!”

“It's not a problem, we can do it again together. Don't panic. I'm going to ask you a few questions before we start any kind of examinations. First of all, when and how did you feel that something was wrong with your kidneys?”

“During my wedding, I felt a light pain in my kidneys. But I thought it was only because I was nervous and all...”

“When was your wedding?”

“One week ago.”

“Alright. Did you lose blood through your mouth or anywhere else?”

“No.”

“Did you lose weight?”

“Doctor Maylor weighed me earlier and said that I've lost seven kilos.”

“Seven kilos since when?”

“My wedding.”

Doctor Campbell's eyes widened, but he kept asking her some questions.

“When you were in Japan, did you have troubles sleeping?”

“I did. Actually, I slept less and less, I had cold sweats all the time. And the night before I passed out, my pain woke me up. I wandered in the hotel, I took painkillers, the ones I usually took for my cramps. But it didn't change anything. When I came back, I couldn't fall asleep.”

“And during the trip?”

“I didn't.”

He scribbled some things on his clipboard, frowning and nodded at all the things she said. She kept explaining all the things that led her to her current situation, mentioning her nauseas when it came to eating, the hot water she used to try to relax... Everything got written down.

Doctor Campbell brought her to a sort of tiny room, where she removed her jeans, her cardigan and her t-shirt. There was a tiny mirror nailed to the wall, in which she finally saw herself. The few curves she had were starting to disappear. She still had some, but they were not as important as before. She sighed and removed her necklace and wedding ring. There was another door in the room, at the opposite of this she walked to get in. She opened it and saw the big room for x-rays. There was an iron table in the middle, with a big machine above it. There were plenty of other things she did not know, and a small cabin in which Doctor Campbell was getting ready.

Taylor shyly walked in and Doctor Campbell smiled at her.

“Are you ready?”

“I think so.”

“Let me help you get on the table.”

He got out of the cabin and carefully picked her up, laying her down on the iron table, on her back. The sudden coldness made her jump at first, but as she got used to it, it actually eased her pain. She followed the instructions given by the doctor, staring at the ceiling, as he settled the machine. Then, he got back to the cabin and pressed a button, which activated the x-rays.

After a few seconds, the doctor got out of the cabin and allowed her to go back to the tiny room she found herself in before. She quickly dressed up, putting on her wedding ring first. Then, she got out, waiting for the doctor outside. He went up to her a few minutes later, with a bottle of water.

“We'll have to do a sonogram to see your kidneys in full details. You must drink the half of this bottle, and then wait an hour without going to the toilet. There is a cafeteria in the next corridor, you can sit there. Meanwhile, I'm going to see your results with another doctor, I'll tell you when it's time.”

Taylor nodded and followed the direction the doctor showed her, already drinking. If only she knew that she would wait all this time, she would have brought a book along.

An hour later, Doctor Campbell came to the cafeteria and found Taylor asleep on the table she was sitting at. He gently woke her up, telling her that it was time for the sonogram. She followed him and removed her t-shirt, lying on her stomach on the long chair. There was a big machine next to it, and a small screen on which the doctor would see through her body. He grabbed a tube of gel, which he spread on her lower back.

Taylor almost fell asleep while the doctor was examining her with the ultrasound. Ten minutes later, he lightly shook her, and she looked up.

“It's over.”

She nodded and put on her t-shirt again. Feeling the urge to go to the toilet, she slowly walked up to it. Before she locked the door, Doctor Campbell called her. She opened the door and saw him handing her a tiny plastic cup with a silicone top.

“I know it's not pleasant at all, but we need to analyse your urine.”

“Alright.”

She grabbed it and locked the door, pulling a disgusted face before filling it. She closed it and washed her hands in the small sink next to the toilet, before going out. She handed the cup to the doctor, who grabbed it and left the room.

Taylor sat there, exhausted and nervous about the results. The fact that the doctor did not say anything was more than worrying. Perhaps he only did not know about them yet. Of course, he could not snap his fingers and have all the answers.

Doctor Campbell came back and smiled at Taylor.

“You can go back to the cafeteria, but still stay around. You'll already have some results today, and you urine is being analysed in our laboratory right now. I'm afraid you'll have to wait a lot, but at least you'll have your answers.”

“Alright. Thank you.”

“I'm going to give you painkillers, so you'll be able to have a nap.”

Doctor Campbell rummaged through his pocket and opened a box, putting two pills in the palm of his hand. He gave them to Taylor, who swallowed them with water. She gathered her stuff and went to the cafeteria, nervously waiting for her results. She wanted to call John and talk to him, just to hear his voice. But he needed some rest, and so did she.

Taylor slowly opened her eyes. She did not remember that she fell asleep in the cafeteria, but she felt better and relaxed. She took a look at her watch and saw that it was already five in the afternoon. She sighed and stood up, rummaging through her wallet to find a coin. She walked up to the coffee machine and asked for a tea. She waited for her cup and took it once it was ready. She smiled at some people who were waiting like her in the cafeteria, some with their family, some without. She sat at her table again, sipping her tea.

“Mrs Deacon?”

Taylor jumped and turned her head, seeing another doctor looking at everybody in the room, looking at his clipboard. She nodded and stood up, gathering her belongings and walking up to him slowly. Fear started to grow in her chest, and it took hold of her whole body. Her hands were shaking, as they brought her cup to her lips again. She painfully swallowed the beverage, suddenly wanting to throw it away.

She followed the doctor to an office a few corridors away. Silently, she sat before the desk, waiting for him to tell her the results. A clock was ticking loudly in her head, making her mad. The doctor sat before her, clearing his throat.

“I saw the results of your x-ray, sonogram and urine test. I'm sorry that you had to wait that long.”

“It's alright, sir.”

“What you have in your kidney is not a cyst.”

“What is it?”

Taylor's fingers clenched on the handle of her handbag. The doctor spoke; she nodded; he paused and spoke again. Taylor nodded again and turned her head thoughtfully to the window, staring at the raindrops crashing against it.