A sudden, sharp pain in the kidneys made Taylor wake up with a start. She immediately pressed her hand against her mouth, holding her breath and wincing. She looked all around her and noticed that the room was still plunged into darkness. Beside her slept John, lying on the side, with his mouth slightly open, snoring quietly.

Taylor felt a wave of tears taking hold of her eyes and did not even try to hold them back. What could she do right now? There probably was nobody at the reception, and she was in a city she did not know, how could she call a doctor? Moreover, worrying John was the last thing she wanted to do. Therefore, she was left helpless.

She lay on her back, staring at the ceiling, without removing her hand from her lips. The pain was so strong that she started to bite her fingers, making one of them bleed. She had to fall asleep, that was the only way she could not feel the pain. Suddenly, an idea popped in her mind. She silently got out of bed, making sure that she did not wake John, and walked on tip-toe to her handbag, on the table. She opened it without making any noise, and looked inside.

She had forgotten she brought pain killers. Obviously, it would never be enough for such a pain, for she usually used them for her stomach cramps, and it was not always effective. But after all, what was the better option between suffering like a dying horse and having a less strong pain? She grabbed two and sneaked in the bathroom, locking the door. She grabbed the glass in which she had put her toothbrush and filled it with cool water. She threw the pills on her mouth, drinking right after.

Taylor sat on the edge of the bathtub, massaging her kidneys as hard as she could, though she knew it would not work. It was not an ordinary pain. It was way stronger. An hour passed, but the pain did not. Completely hopeless, she switched off the light and got out of the bathroom. It was still dark outside, and she bent over John's bedside table to look at his watch. It was four in the morning.

For long and long seconds, she stared at the bed, wondering if she would go back to bed. She shook her head and quickly put her shorts, a t-shirt and her shoes on. She took her key of the room, gave John a light kiss and left the room.

Taylor wandered in the empty and silent corridors of the Tokyo Hilton, without switching the light buttons on her way. She usually would be terrified of such an atmosphere, prefering bright places and noisy conversations floating all around. At least she did since John and her got into a relationship. She was used to have Brian, Freddie and Roger around; sometimes Mary, Freddie's girlfriend, would come, and she would have interesting conversations with her. Though it also was the case with Suzy, Taylor felt relieved to talk about something else than shopping and clothes with another girl.

Trying her best to reassure herself and to calm herself, Taylor tried to think about the band, and all the good memories they shared. The first time she saw them on stage. Pain. The first time she had dinner with them all. Pain. The first time she photographed them on stage. Pain. The first time they went to a club all together. Pain. The time she comforted Brian after his girlfriend left him. Pain. The time she had to cheer Roger up after he got in a terrible fight with Brian. Pain. The time she tried to bring Freddie and Mary back together after an argument. Pain. The time they all prepared a surprise for her birthday, and she had no clue. Pain. When she called John from the corridor. Pain. When she walked up to the kitchen and saw nobody. Pain. When she went up to the dark living room and it suddenly lit up. Pain. When they were all singing Happy Birthday to her, smiling and jumping, holding flowers. Pain. When John and her went to Saint-Malo. Pain. The first time they kissed. Pain. The first time they met. Pain. When she moved to his house. Pain. When they got engaged. Pain. When they welcomed Malo. Pain. When they got married. Pain.

Even after remembering all those moments, those she cherished the most, the pain did not vanish. It did not even calm a little. She stopped walking and looked all around her. Did she get lost? She took a look at the closest room number and read 620. She walked three floors.

She sighed desperately and leant on the edge of a window in the middle of the corridor she was in. Tokyo was bright but asleep. Clubs and shops were closed, so were bars. She noticed that one restaurant was still open, but someone was wiping some dust out of it, so she guessed it was closing.

Taylor sighed and sobbed quietly, pressing her forehead against the cold glass of the window. The pain killers were not strong enough, that was a fact. She did not want to tell John she needed to go to a doctor or to a chemist's. She did not want to spoil all their honeymoon, and she knew that if she told him, he would not leave her for a minute, fearing that she might pass out in the shower, or anything like that. She remembered what happened when she simply caught a cold. Of course, John took good care of her, she could not deny it. However, he panicked every single time she coughed or sneezed, ready to call an ambulance.

She could not even imagine what he would do if he learnt about her kidneys.

Taylor managed to calm down and sighed. She pulled away from the window and got back to the third floor. In the stairway, every time she walked a step, her kidneys would burn, and she tried hard not to yell.

Once she reached the door of the room 354, she took her keys out from her pocket and unlocked it; she sneaked in and locked it again. Before she did any step inside, she stood still and caught her breath, wanting to make sure that John was still sleeping. Luckily, she heard loud snorings coming from the bed, and she could not help but grin. She removed her shoes but kept her clothes on. She sat on the windowsill, pressing her back against the wall, staring outside, doing nothing but waiting... Waiting... Waiting...

John yawned loudly, stretching his arms as far as possible, as if his purpose was to push the walls. He blinked slowly, rubbing his face with his hands and managed to open both of his eyes. Outside, the sun was bright, and it reflected on the windows of each building he could see. Therefore, the room got rid of its night-time darkness.

His hand searched for Taylor next to him, but as it did not find her, he looked up, and saw her sitting on the windowsill, pale, with dark circles under her eyes. He frowned lightly and sat up on the bed, catching her eyes.

“Good morning, darling” she whispered with a weak grin. “Did you sleep well?”

“Uh, yeah” John said in his morning voice, causing him to clear his voice and repeat. “How long have you been awake?”

“A few minutes only” she lied.

“You're already dressed.”

“Oh, I didn't want people to admire my bum, that's why.”

“You're right, this bum is mine.”

“Anytime.”

John chuckled and so did Taylor; but as soon as she started, she bit her cheeks to refrain from wincing at her kidneys pain. She gracefully stood up and reached the bed, crawling into John's open arms. She tenderly pressed her lips against his, stroking his neck and massaging his scalp. He smiled and gently rubbed the tip of his nose against hers.

“You should've woken me up, you know” John whispered.

“I didn't want to, and you were so cute, snoring loudly and all.”

“Oh shit, I did that?!”

“You did.”

“I must've disturbed you, then!”

“Nope. I didn't hear it.”

Taylor giggled and kissed him once again, taking his hands and intertwining their fingers. She made hers dance with John's, humming a song she made up in her head. After a few minutes, she kissed his forehead.

“Do you allow me to take my shower first?”

“Sure, darling” he whispered, kissing her cheekbone, “you don't need to ask.”

“Thank you, John.”

“Is everything alright, love? You don't look that great... Do you feel better than yesterday?”

Taylor blinked and smiled as much as she could. She could not tell him... She could not tell him... She could not...

“I feel way better!”

“You're pale, Taylor.”

“I didn't have much sleep this night. But it's alright, don't worry. I feel ready to go out today. Isn't that what matters? Of course, I'm also ready to love my dear John even more!”

John smiled weakly, looking at her suspisciously. He sighed and shrugged, squeezing her against his chest. Taylor abruptly bit her lip, as her pain came back. She could not blame John, he could not know. She still managed to grin, before standing up and gathering clothes she would wear for the day. She locked herself in the bathroom, after kissing John one more time.

As soon as the door closed, Taylor sat on the floor and buried her face in her t-shirt. She broke down into tears, shivering as the pain grew and grew. She knew she could not live forever like that without telling anyone, and right now, she felt like running back to the room and explaining everything to John. However, she felt too weak to do so. Instead, she removed her clothes and crawled up to the bathtub, turning on the tap and sneaking in. She moaned as she moved.

Like the day before, she turned the tap to make the water hot, waiting for it to reach a good temperature for her muscles to relax. She was standing up, but her knees were shaking, and her whole body felt numb. She held on to the wall, feeling her legs giving out. Suddenly, she felt like stars were dancing before her eyes. Her vision was blurred, and she could hardly breathe. She curled up and rested her forehead on her knees, inhaling and exhaling as much as she could.

When the dizzy spell vanished, she covered her body with hot water, rubbing her skin weakly with soap. She rinsed herself and turned off the tap, grabbing her towel and standing up. She was more relaxed, so it was easier for her to stand.

She slowly put on her clothes, wincing at every move. She lazily brushed her long blonde hair; as it hurt like mad every time she would move her arms, she would not tie them up this day. She brushed her teeth, struggling to stand still and not bend over the sink. She rinsed her mouth, let out a cry when she took her towel that fell to the floor, and hung it to the towel rail. She switched off the light and left the bathroom.

After breakfast, John and Taylor walked hand in hand to their bedroom, chatting about random stuff that came to their mind. Once they got in, John called Tomohisa, suggesting a destination, and it seemed like the taxi driver agreed. Taylor sat on the windowsill once again, feeling her head spinning. While John was talking to Tomohisa through the phone, she stared at her feet, trying to think about something else. When she heard her dear husband hanging up the phone, she looked up at him and smiled. He sat beside her, holding one of the books she bought, opening it at a certain page.

“I thought about bringing you to the Shinjuku Imperial Gardens. We all loved it when we went there between two gigs. We have to pay at the entrance, but it's really worth it. It's quite cheap, though.”

Taylor smiled wider and nodded, looking at the pictures he showed her. He patted the picture of a temple and got closer to her, resting his head on her shoulder.

“There's a temple in the garden. Remember, I showed you the pictures when I got back from Japan two years ago. It's not even a Japanese one. If I remember well, it's Taiwanese.”

She nodded, acting as if she listened to him. Actually, his voice sounded so far, and she could not even understand one or two words. John put a hand on her shoulder.

“Taylor? Are you alright?”

“Yeah, yes... I just feel... tired.”

“Oh, do you want us to stay at the hotel for the day? I must admit that we didn't get much rest for the last couple of days.”

“No, no, the visit is important.”

“We can go another day.”

“I really want to go.”

John sighed and tenderly stroked her cheek. He leant in to kiss her lips, wrapping his arms around her and hugging her. She closed her eyes, feeling safe in his arms, smelling his perfume, and listening to his heartbeats. Suddenly, her pain left her. Of course! How could she forget the most powerful medicine? No need to take pills, no need to stuff herself with things made up in laboratories. How could she had forgotten John's arms? After all, this is the place where she would always feel safer. Love was the cure. Only love.

Taylor sat up and wrapped her arms around John's neck, kissing him passionately, almost climbing on top of him – unfortunately, there was not enough space. Instead, she landed back on her feet, and John spread his legs to leave her some space closer to him. Then, he suddenly wrapped his legs around her waist, pulling away a bit with a smirk.

“Got you now.”

“But you always got me.”

“I'm the best hunter, then.”

She smiled sweetly and slowly closed her eyelids, feeling John's warm mouth landing on hers, stroking it with its soft lips. She grabbed his waist, making him grin, as he buried his hands in her hair. Taylor completely lost herself in the kiss, feeling like she was floating, far from everything. There was nothing else than her and John. Her John. Her lovely John. He came into her life so abruptly, even so tenderly. She wondered what she would have become without him. She would still be stuck in her crappy flat of Whitechapel, with an empty room full of empty frames, with the constant fear of Elenore coming back to murder her. Even though she claimed that she loved life all the time, hers was hell. However, she always believed that one day, things would be better. Never had she imagined that it was John who would change the lot. Even when she met him, she did not believe in such a thing.

And now, what was she? The happiest woman on Earth.

The telephone rang, making them jump and pull away from each other. Taylor briefly kissed John's lips, before walking up to it, picking it up. She pressed the handset against her ear, leaning on the table.

“Hello?”

“Good morning, Mrs Deacon, this is the reception. We would like to inform you that somebody is waiting for you in the hall. His name is Mr. Tomohisa.”

“Great! We're coming in a minute. Thank you, madam.”

Then, the receptionist hung up. Taylor cleared her throat and turned to John.

“Well, Tomohisa's waiting.”

John nodded and jumped on his feet. He bypassed the bed to take Taylor's backpack, putting it on the mattress. Taylor followed him and as she bent over her suitcase, the sharp pain in her kidneys came back, paralysing her. Her eyes widened, and she immediately held on to the bed. John noticed it and ran up to her.

“Taylor? What's going on?”

“I, uh... My back... It's gone.”

“Oh shit, is it your kidneys hurting again?”

“No” she lied, wincing. “I must've slept in a very bad position, that's all. Can you please take my purple cardigan in my suitcase?”

“Sure, let me get it.”

John knelt down beside her suitcase, opening it widely and looking for the cardigan. He took it and closed her suitcase, handing the cloth to her.

“Put it in the backpack, it's just in case. I know that we're going to visit temples, and it won't be very warm in there. Ah, shit!”

“Are you sure you want to visit the temple? We can stay here and call a doctor!”

“No, no, no, I want to go out! Don't make a fuss about it, it's not the first time that it happens to me.”

John nodded, trying to calm himself. He helped Taylor pack the stuff she wanted to bring along, and they were gone.

When they arrived in the hall, Taylor felt a bit better. Tomohisa was standing beside the counter, his hands joined in his back, as if he was looking after the customers passing by. When he saw the couple, he smiled widely and bowed to them.

“Good morning, Deacon-san! Did you have a good night?”

“We did, thank you, how about you?”

“I did too. Are you ready to go? Is it still okay for the Shinjuku Imperials Gardens?”

“Still is.”

“Let's go, then!”

The couple followed Tomohisa out of the hotel until they reached the taxi. Taylor and John sat on the backseat, as usual, and the driver sat where he was supposed to. He started up the car and drove away from the hotel.

However, Taylor's kidneys were still extremely painful. She tried her best to hide it. Perhaps she could take Tomohisa apart and ask him where she could find a doctor... That sounded good. She grabbed John's hand and unintentionally squeezed it hard. He winced, and Taylor immediately apologised. Instead of going mad, he shook his hand and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, chuckling, whispering “It's nothing, dear” in her ear.

Tomohisa asked John about the places he visited when he came to Tokyo with Queen. He also told the driver about the places he visited in Kyoto, Osaka, Nagoya, Fukuoka, and the few other cities he went to. When asked about the places she wanted to visit, Taylor could hardly speak. Her body feeling incredibly numb because of the pain, she felt like her jaw was anaesthetised.

“I... wou... would... liketovis... liketovisit...”

John frowned and cupped her face in his hands, staring at her right into her eyes.

“Taylor, you're not okay.”

“I'm on m... my pe... periods” she said, as it was the only excuse she found. “I too... took pain kill... killersthismorning, but it hu... hurts.”

“You're not lying to me, huh?”

“No. You know I... I've already been in tha... that state before.”

This time, it was not a lie. Almost every time she had cramps, the pain would be horrible and would leave her in this kind of state. It was easier to hide the truth for once.

“C'mon” John said, patting his arm “rest your head on my shoulder and try to sleep a bit. Tomohisa said we still have thirty minutes until we reach the gardens.”

Taylor nodded and obeyed to John. Rocked by the driving car, she almost immediately fell asleep, hearing the two men's voices fading away, more and more.

“Love? Taylor!”

John's voice was whispering in her ear. How long had she been sleeping? Where was she? What time was it? She slowly blinked and saw John, sitting right next to her, smiling at her.

“Wake up, darling. We're at the gardens.”

Taylor nodded slowly and rubbed her eyes with her fists. Tomohisa opened the door for her, helping her out by holding her hand. John got out too, looking all around him in amazement. Almost immediately, he grabbed the camera and photographed the landscape. Tomohisa led them to the gate, where two staff members were standing. They made the three stop, and spoke in Japanese to Tomohisa, who answered them.

“It's three hundred yens to enter the gardens” the driver translated.

“We foresaw that.”

John rummaged through Taylor's backpack, taking out his wallet. He tenderly kissed her hair.

“I'm paying for us both.”

He looked into his wallet and took out the right amount of money they needed. He handed it to the two staff members, who gave them tickets and guides in English. They thanked them, and the couple turned to Tomohisa.

“Are you coming with us?”

“No, I came here a thousand times already! But I'll be waiting for you there, in the taxi. If you don't see me, just stay there, it means that I went nearby to buy some food.”

“Alright. See you later!”

John and Taylor entered the gardens, and she widened her eyes. Though it was in November, many trees still had their leaves, and they lazily moved as a warm breeze blew over them. There was a long typical Japanese bridge, surrounded by flowers of many kinds, a path of pebbles, lying above a large pond. There was a French garden, an English one, and a green grove. Many people were walking there, looking at the old resthouses and at fishes in the ponds.

This was Japan at its finest.

The couple walked through the huge park, taking many pictures. When Taylor owned it, she would take a lot of photographs of John posing shyly in the middle of the beauty of the landscape. Little did he know that he was a beauty as well...

After an hour and a half of walking past the naked cherry trees and the proud oak trees, they reached the Taiwanese pavilion, which John mentioned earlier in the morning. Though it was open, Taylor took out her purple cardigan from her backpack, pressing it against her chest just in case she would need it.

They entered it, and John took a look at the guide the staff members gave them at the entrance. He read a few lines and explained to Taylor when and how the pavilion was built, and as he remembered many things from his last visit, he happpily talked about it.

However, Taylor could not hear him. She tried to focus on his voice and on his back, but she could not. Once again, the pain in her kidneys hit her. She had troubles following him, feeling her legs weighing heavier and heavier; she could almost hear her heart beating in her ears, and all the scents around her suddenly seemed stronger. Her vision was all blurred, she was lost. She had to follow the bright white shirt. But being too excited about the place, John was walking too fast for her.

When she wanted to ask him to walk slower, her voice got stuck in her throat, making an awkward gargle. She suddenly felt so small, surrounded by giants, talking in different languages. There was nothing she could hold herself to, no walls, no gates, nothing. This time, her legs were way too heavy for her to carry them. She stopped walking, seeing John walking further. Her whole body was numb, and the only thing she felt was her kidneys. Her goddamn kidneys. She was shaking, her muscles being more tensed than ever. She was trapped.

“...and that's why the pavilion is Taiwanese!”

With a proud smile, John looked on the left and on the right.

“Taylor?”

He spun round and saw Taylor, standing a few metres away from him. His smile immediately vanished. Even from where he was, he could see her shivering madly, staring into space. Her face was almost as white as his shirt, and her lips seemed to turn purple.

Taken aback, he felt like hhis heels had been nailed to the ground.

“Taylor! Are you alright?!”

No, she was not. And she could not get worse. Taylor slightly opened her mouth to answer, as his words were the only ones that reached her ears, though they were only coming through in waves. Her eyes desperately looked all around, trying to find something reassuring. Even though John was in her field of vision, she could not see him.

The pain in her kidneys hit her once again like a spear, and she tried to scream, but once again, her voice got stuck in her throat. Tears started to roll down her cheeks, and they felt so hot. They were boiling. She heard hurried footsteps coming to her, and she knew it was John.

But she was gone. Her eyes rolled upwards, and she felt her knees giving out. She lost her balance, and her arms followed the direction of her body. It felt like an endless fall, as if it was in slow motion.

A man shouted. John. The last thing she saw was the purple cardigan being thrown in the air.