After one other month of intensive chemotherapy, the doctors announced Taylor and John that she finally could go home. Taylor burst with joy, eager to be with her son again, and with Malo. However, despite her treatments that helped her lungs getting better, she still had to carry an oxygen tank, as the risks of having her lungs filled with water again were considerable.

What a relief for her to leave the Royal Marsden Hospital after two months of imprisonment! The white walls and floors would disappear to be replaced by more colourful rooms, such as her son's. Robert... Oh finally, she could see Robert...

One morning, John came early to the hospital to help her pack her stuff in two different suitcases. The doctors gave her back the clothes she wore when she arrived, all wrapped in a plastic bag. With John's help, Taylor removed those awful hospital clothes and felt the softness of a t-shirt and the comfort of bell-bottoms for the first time in forever.

When all her books, magazines, drawings and other things got packed in a bag, Taylor raised her middle finger to the room, leaving it forever. So long, room 539.

John had to sign some papers at the reception desk, and she was free. Like the first time he took her home after being hospitalised, she started to sing I'm Free by The Who, but this time, she could not jump everywhere like she did. She carried the lighter bag to the car, dragging the heavy oxygen tank behind her. Her nose itched because of the cannulas, and she sighed.

She had hoped they would free her from them too.

John opened the trunk of his car and put the two suitcases in it. He made sure they would not slip of anything, and added Taylor's bag. She stepped back when he closed the trunk, and looked at him lovingly, as if he was the Messiah. In a certain way, he was, for her. After all, he changed her whole life only for the better and saved her many times. Furthermore, he was crazy about her, and he did not even leave her when she started to be sick. He always took good care of her, bringing her books or other things when she got too bored, buying her chocolate when she was in a terrible mood, helping her move when her limbs refused to, and helped her take her showers or dressing her up.

Jesus could totally crawl back to the hole he came out of.

John turned to her and tenderly took her hand, a broad smile appearing on his face. She had not stopped grinning, when he was there she could not anyway. He closed his eyes and leant in, pressing his warm lips against hers, giving them all the reassurance and the love they longed for. His hands carefully slipped on her cheeks, avoiding the cannulas. She got closer to him, making the wheels of the oxygen tank squeal on the pebbles.

Even during all the time she was at hospital, John did not kiss her like he was at the moment. His main goal was to look after her when the doctors were away, and distracting her for a while. He did kiss her, but the pecks on the lips were more regular than real kisses. Now, she was not the weak chick anymore; she could go home. This kiss was like the medal he was giving her after so much time of suffering and getting mad.

Best medal ever.

When John pulled away, he stroked the tip of her nose, kissing it. He looked at her hair and realised that there were many spots where she had none. How many times did he have to pick all the hair remaining on her pillow, on her clothes or in the bathroom? However, he had not realised earlier about how much hair she lost.

Yet, even though her hair was gettting thin, she still was the gorgeous woman he married almost one year before. Even if she was going to turn bald, she would remain this gorgeous creature.

Taylor coughed lightly and cleared her throat, before resting her hands on his chest. She kissed his neck and smiled at him.

“Time to go home, huh?”

“Definitely time to go home!” he grinned. “I changed a few things there so you'll feel more comfortable.”

“Oh? Like what?”

“I bought a new couch, which is longer and larger. And it's softer too. Then, I bought a new bed with a better mattress for you, and you'll have some extra space to put your oxygen tank. Then, huh... I changed the decoration of the bedroom. But if you don't like it, I'd like you to tell me.”

“Okay. I can't wait to see those changes!”

“I bet you can't” he smiled, pecking her on the lips. “Okay, now, let's go!”

She grabbed his hand and let him lead her to the passenger seat. He pushed back the seat, helped her sit on it, and wedged the tank between her knees. When he closed the door, she fastened her belt and waited for him to get in. He started up the car and drove away from the hospital.

Twenty minutes later, the blue car parked in front of the Deacons' house. John smiled at Taylor and got out of the car, closing the door behind him. Suddenly, Taylor felt anxious. She nervously clutched the handle of the oxygen tank, feeling her heart beating faster. She could not even dare looking at the house, though she had been waiting for that for so long.

John bypassed the car and opened Taylor's door. She still had not unfasten her belt. When he saw her face, he frowned and rested a hand on her shoulder.

“Taylor? Taylor, are you okay?”

“I don't know if I should go in.”

“What? But why, my dear?”

She gulped and turned to him, her eyes getting all teary. Her bottom lip started to tremble, as she held back her crying.

“What if Robert doesn't recognise me? What if I'm just a stranger to him? What if he doesn't want me around?”

“Oh, darling, of course he'll recognise you! You're his mother! I bet he missed you a lot, way more than you can think!”

“But I'm not a good mother, John...”

“Hey, it's not your fault if you're ill! How can you even blame yourself?” he said, kneeling down beside her so he would face her. “Stop me if I'm wrong, but you didn't choose to have this tumor in your kidney, you didn't choose to have this pleural effusion, you didn't choose to have this lung cancer, you didn't choose to have metastases, you didn't choose to have your other kidney infected!”

Taylor sighed and felt the tears rolling down her face. She did not want her son to see her as a stranger. She had not been there for him in the first steps of his life. What mother could even miss such a thing?

“I can't even see him grow up” she hiccupped. “All I can do is try to remember my baby and imagine what he looks like now.”

“I have a picture in my wallet. Would you like to see it? Or do you prefer to keep the surprise for when you see him?”

“Keep the surprise.”

“Very good. Come on, my love. Robert loves you, and he knows it's not your fault if you can't be there.”

“He's only two months old, how can he know?”

“He can feel it.”

She sighed once again and stared at her white knuckles. She nodded and unfastened her belt with a trembling hand, under the tender look of a smiling John. She carefully got out of the car and took her oxygen tank. As she started to make her way to the trunk, John stopped her.

“I'm taking care of all your stuff. But there's something you can do, and I know you won't refuse.”

He rummaged through the pocket of his jeans and took out a big bunch of keys. He grabbed the right one and handed it to her. With a wide grin, he whispered.

“Now, go find your baby.”

Her lips stretched into a broad smile, as she took the key with a trembling hand. John kissed her forehead and stroked her soft hair.

“Do you need me to walk you to the door?”

“No, I think I'm okay.”

“Tell me if you need any difficulty.”

“Okay.”

She took a deep breath and spun round to walk slowly to the front door. The soles of her shoes met the pebbles of the long path leading to it, making her feet bend a bit from time to time. Whereas she used to not pay attention to this path, this time it had a whole meaning to her. It was this of freedom and it felt as if it was whispering Robert's name to her.

She reached the door without any difficulty, lifting the tank from time to time when it got stuck in the stone. She gasped for breath silently and slid the key in the keyhole. She slowly pushed the door, making it squeak pleasantly.

Oh, finally she could smell it! The delicious scent of her home. Oh, she could tell that John ate cheese on toasts recently. She could smell the talc for the baby. She could smell the few candles they had in the living room. She could... smell the relief.

She stepped in hesitantly, feeling the wooden floor under her feet. She dragged her tank behind her, peeking in the living room to see the couch John told her about. Indeed, it was larger and longer. However, she wondered where he put the old one. She loved the old couch. She walked up to her empty room, keeping the suspense for her reunion with her baby.

When she opened the empty room, she saw the old couch at the opposite, right under the window. The sun was shining everywhere, and the pictures in the frames seemed to be alive for a second. She saw that new frames had been filled, and she slowly walked up to them. There were some pictures of the day Taylor got home from the hospital months ago, and some of Robert when he was born. Her lips stretched into a smile, and she struggled to hold back her tears.

“Miaow.”

She jumped and turned round to see Malo on the old couch. She gasped with joy and sat beside the cat, who was stretching her back and paws. Malo happily jumped on Taylor's lap, rubbing herself against her stomach, and miaowing endlessly.

“Oh, I missed you too, Malo!” she giggled, stroking her back. “Don't miaow like that, you're going to wake Robert!”

Too late. She heard muffled noises coming from the baby's bedroom. She gulped as she heard a soft crying coming out of there. She carefully put Malo down, kissing her between her ears, and dragged her oxygen tank to the door of the bedroom.

Taylor could feel her heart beating like mad. She could hear her son crying. But what if she got in, and she could not calm him because he would not recognise her?

She took a deep breath and held it as she opened the door. Through the bars of the bed, she could see Robert... her baby. His face was red from crying, and he was shaking his tiny arms and legs. Gasping and covering her mouth with her hands, she slowly got closer, the warm tears soaking her t-shirt. She stopped near the bed and leant over it.

“Hello, Robert” she whispered in a shaky voice.

At the sound of her voice, Robert stopped crying. He blinked and looked at Taylor, as if he was mesmerised. He started to chew on his fingers, and she burst into tears. She let go of the handle of her tank and carefully picked up her son. She gently pressed him against her, weeping with all her heart and soul, rocking him gently at the same time. Behind her, John appeared in the room and leant on the doorframe. He was watching the scene with a wide smile and tears invading his eyes.

Taylor pulled away lightly and looked at Robert's face. Just like Brian told her one month before, he had brownish hair and green eyes. It was quite hard to tell if he looked more like John or her. But now she could tell that what Brian, Freddie, Roger and John said was true: Robert was handsome.

Feeling tired of standing with the weight of the baby, Taylor grabbed her oxygen tank and dragged it closer, so she could sit on the armchair. Robert was staring at her with a smile, making her heart leap inside her chest. She was still sobbing, looking at her son she had not seen for so long.

John sniffed and silently walked in. Taylor noticed he was there, and reached out a hand for him to take. He grabbed it and knelt down before her, admiring their son.

“He's... He's... Very handsome” she whispered. “I can't believe this lovely thing came out of my stomach.”

“Lovely women give birth to lovely babies!” John smiled. “It looks like you've taken your own eyes and given them to him. His eyes are not like mine, and the guys agree.”

“But the hair is definitely yours!”

“Perhaps.”

“I'm blonde, darling” she laughed.

John chuckled and craned his neck to kiss her tenderly. Between them, Robert seemed to be peaceful. He could not take his eyes off her. There was the woman who spent a lot of time with him what seemed to be a long time ago. He had been wondering where she went, and if he did something wrong. But no. She came back to him, and he knew that she would not let him down again.