TW- suicidal thoughts, self loathing, mentions of self harm.

37

vent.

tubbo's POV.

i jumped onto my bed, grunting as my side hit the bed. it felt rock hard.

throwing myself to the side, almost falling off the bed. i finally grabbed the notebook. and flipped to an empty page. 

'can't believe i'm wasting perfectly good paper just because i can't handle the feeling of loneliness'

i put the pencil down, barely knowing what to say. 

"i hate this feeling, this awful feeling like everyone is gonna forget you just because you were off for a day"

i scribbled over it, stupid.
flipping to the next page, i immediately wrote

"gross, freak, nothing, hated, forgotten, replaced." all over the page, i smiled.

"alone
alone
alone
alone
alone"
i repeated out loud.

smiling to myself, i flipped another page. 
"forgotten, alone, hated, deserves this."
all over the page, some big, some small.

tell me if i fucked up on anything

vote bc im desperate 😉

short chapter, sorry. i had no motivation and i have my things taken away, i'm not even supposed to be on. i'm so so so fucking sorry, i'll try making a part 2.