Toward the Stars Above Me (poem)
Based on that photo I drew
We blot out the sky with black ink
Covering the stars with our handwriting
We color over galaxies
Full canvas of our own indecency
They colored over your hands, your thighs
Took their red pen to correct your blemishes
Just as red lines burn into the side of the trees
Marked for destruction
A river runs down the side of my body
Almost like it's crying my tears
Smearing their writing on my face and arms
Black river runs into oblivion, constantly devouring
Owls swoop, talons open for a living meal
Crickets line up for sport on its banks
Dive, ready to die in the hungry waves
Welcoming the cold kiss of death
I scream my lungs until raw
Sound absorbed by forest
My fleeting life abhorred by its creatures
Mocking the trespasser in the river
Humans are no better
Writing eulogies as if they'd known you
Scattering pieces of tears like flowers
Wilting daisies over your grave
In front of all I cried you
And still they wrote on your casket
They drew over my speeches,
Humans, like crickets, lined up for sport
They'll have a contest, dive into pools of ink
Reciting poems they've written on your skin
Except no one wins, I've already lost you
Maybe the river can wash away their paint
I miss the stars, I miss your face
Both blotted out by their consuming eyes
If only then I'd known how much
The weight of living cost you
Frogs and creeping things chant your voice
A chorus of crickets singing your elegy
Stars dance you away into the heavens
Requiem echoes through the forest
Dark arms of Thanatos enclose again,
As the embrace of mud and weed enclose me
They tried to color in all your flaws
Written pillory snuffing your existence
I saw you laughing through the tears
As you slowly slipped away
The river carrying your carcass to Sheol
And still they scribbled on your remains
Glance at my arms, where marks outline
Frantic creations of my mind
Maybe they write my eulogy too
Preparing for the river to devour another
Ripples run, my blood runs faster,
Knees dig into mud, water reaching higher
Justice fill my nose and mouth
Glance under water, I can't breathe
Everything went south the day you left
Town haunting me like ghosts
Mocking the one I held so close
Pillaging my treasured memories
And still crickets die, fish swim, woods sing
They still write over lives, write over stars,
I can't breathe
Drawings on our faces from their marker
It keeps going even as they furiously erase
Try to replace nature, writing all over
I can't breathe
Hand through dirt, pulling
Sweet goodbyes they'll utter
As if they didn't color over my life
Smothering it with paper
All their corrections they'll remember
Splash of river, face goes under
I can't breathe
I can't breathe
I can't breathe
Foolish hand, reaching out
All I catch is a glimpse above
Unfettered with the designs of man
I wish I couldn't breathe
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