Sarawat's POV
2 month ago.
Suffering is the not the appropriate word to describe how I feel right now. It's agony and torture. My heart is constantly in pain from the heartbreak but the rest of me feels numb. Two day after Tine left me to go on his plane, I cried myself to sleep at night. Seeing him in my dreams where the only times we were together and when I woke up, reality reminded me that he was gone and I'm not his anymore.

School has been the same for others but it still felt empty without Tine. Less Drama  and arguments at school now. Everything was in peace again. There was 2 and a half weeks left the last semester was over and next school term, I will be a senior in my faculty.

When I mean everything went back to normal, I mean everything. Khai told me the best way to get over my heart break is that I needed to live life without Tine. So my life without Tine was everything I use to do but before.

I hated going to bed alone so every night I had someone in bed with me. Sleeping with people became a routine but I didn't think getting back to that habit was hard. I never thought of having sex with anyone but Tine. After a couple of nights, I started to sleep with Women and then the men at the clubs.

I didn't care who's partner they belong too. I flirted and slept with anyone that was interested in me. If I saw them glance at me a couple of times a night, I was gonna make them my next bed victim. Because of that, I've been thrown into a couple of fights. It was the closest I was getting to feeling something in my body. The rush as a fist connected to my skin as the a bruise stained my body.

I didn't mind the feeling but matter how hard I was punched, my heart break pained me even more.

It was a Saturday night as I left the club early. I didn't feel like being in a crowded atmosphere. I was with a girl tonight outside my condo. I think I slept with her a couple of times.

"Wanna smoke?" She offered me a cigarette and I deny her. She took a couple of puffs as she finally dropped the cigarette on the ground.

We went back inside as she grabbed her stuff and bag off my room couch.

"See you later." She said as she gave me a quick kiss on the lips. I tasted the cigarette in her mouth.

I sighed as I flopped down on my bed. I don't know what else to do with myself. I'm a mess and I bet Tine is doing fine where he is. Or maybe he is suffering like me? I would like to believe he still cares about me and thinks about me from time to time but I doubt it.

My door banged hard and I bet it's another guy trying to beat me up again for sleeping with his girlfriend. I stubbornly walked to the door and prepare for another beating. I honestly don't care. If your girl really loved you, she wouldn't have come to my bed.

I opened the door but by my surprised, it was Tharn and Khai. I let them in as I went back to my bed.

"Oh no you don't. Get your ass up Wat. I'm tired of you looking like shit everyday."Tharn told me but I ignore him.

"Shit is not the word that describe him. He's gone off the deep-end." Khai said. "If Tine saw you like this, he would definitely have left you." Khai also added.

"I know what you're trying to do and it's not working. I don't care about Tine anymore. Me and him are through now and he made it very clear that he is never coming back. It's been two months and I haven't missed him." I lied. I'm lying so hard that I don't even recognize my own self.

Everyone knows my behavior is like this because of him. Tine broke me bad.

"Fuck you Wat. You're such a liar. You know damn well you're acting like this because Tine dumped your ass and left you to go all the way to America. Grow up and cut all this crap!" Tharn yells at me.

"Ai Tharn! Chill man. You know he's been through a lot." Khai tries to talk Tharn down.

"Yeah I know he's been through a lot but it's not an excuse for his behavior." Tharn told him and I finally stand up from the bed. I walk up towards Tharn.

"Instead of focusing on me, you should focus on your relationship. I can't imagine how it must feels like to be in a secret relationship with the most homophonic guy in school. It would be a shame if I let it slip and the let the whole school finds out about you and Type." I smirked at Tharn.

He pushed me hard until my back landed on the bed harshly.

"Ai Tharn!" I heard Khai yell at him.

Tharn picked me up by the shirt and raised up his fist. Khai stopped his fist from connecting from my face.

"You know Sarawat didn't mean it. He is hurt that's why he said it." Khai told him.

"So it's excuse for him to hurt his friends?" Tharn questioned him.

"It not but-"

"Fine, if you can't respect me as a friend Wat then I rather not be friends with you at all." Tharn finally said me as he pushed Khai out of the and slammed my door hard as he left.

"You've really gone too far this time." Khai lastly said as he shakes his head of disappointment and left my condo as well.

I ball up my fist as I grab the empty liquor glass bottle and threw it across the room as it shattered all over the floor.

********

Tine's POV
"P'type is dinner ready yet?" I whined as I try to clean up the living room.

"I'm cooking as fast as I can. I don't want to mess up." My brother told me.

"Tommy is gonna be here probably in any minute and I sort of promised him that you cook the best Thai food in the world." I admit to Type.

"You lied to impress your boyfriend?" Type questioned me and I can sense that he is smirking.

"He's not my boyfriend. He's a close friend that's all." I tell him.

I don't know why Type keeps saying Tommy is my boyfriend but he's not. He really is a friend even though Tommy has nice ocean blue eyes and sometimes it so beautiful to stare at for hours. I really only love him and respect him as a close friend. He's helped me a lot and he truly makes me feel good.

I never thought I would be able to survive at NYU. He's been super helpful.

A knock was at the door and I just finish up last touches on the apartment.

"P'Type, I'm getting the door!" I yelled as I scurry to the door and opened it.

I saw Tommy with one bottle of wine in his and another behind his back.

"Tommy! Please come in." I invite him and he walked in.

"Thanks for inviting me and this is.....for you." Tommy showed me a small bouquet of flowers. I smiled and accepted them happily.

"Thanks Tommy. You're very kind." I said to him. "My brother is almost done cooking but you can sit on the couch while we wait for him." I told him and he nodded.

"Please take your time. I'm dying to taste your brothers Thai food in the world." Tommy said and I chuckle a bit.

Tommy and I walked into the dinning room. He saw Type coming out of the kitchen with his robe on.

"Swasdi Kub P'type." Tommy greeted.

"Hello Tommy. Welcome to our home again. Did you travel safe?" Type asked him.

"Yes sir." Tommy told him "I also brought wine from home." Tommy pass the wine to Type and he took it out of his hand.

"Thank you Tommy. This will go well with dinner.  Please wait a tad longer. Food is almost ready." My brother told him.

"Kub." Tommy said and I drag him to the living room.

"I might have exaggerated just a little about my brothers cooking. It's really good but not the best in the world." I finally told Tommy. He laughed.

"I know you were just exaggerating. It's cute when you act like that." Tommy said and he goes to pat my head again. I flinch a bit as I move my head from him. "Oh sorry, I forgot." He apologizes. It's now awkward now.

"Dinner is ready?" I heard P'type yell out.

"Great, Tine let's go eat na." Tommy said as he grabbed my arm and took my to the dining table.

P'Type displayed all the dishes in the middle of the table as I helped set up the plates in bowls for all three of us. We are sat down and ate all the food till our stomachs were full. I love to eat so getting full was always rare but P'type did make a lot of food today.

"Thank you Phi. You're good is really amazing. It was the best Thai food I ever had. I hope to come over again to try when you cook more of these." Tommy said and Type smiled at him.

"Of course. I'll definitely make it again when you come around Tommy." My brother smiled and said to him. "I'll go clean the dishes."He said as P'type got up from the table.

"Oh Phi, let me help you." Tommy offered.

"No No, Tommy please don't help me. I can handle everything." My brother declined him as he went into the kitchen.

Now it's just me and Tommy left alone again.

"Let's go somewhere." Tommy said to me.

"But where?" I questioned him.

"You'll see." Tommy smirked as he grabbed my hand again.

"Um... P'type I'm going out with Tommy tonight. Don't wait up on me!" I yelled as I quickly grab my coat from the rack and ran out with Tommy.

It gets cold in New York at night so it's important to wear a coat always. The streets light were lit and everything just looked so beautiful. I love New York City the best at night. Tommy abs I hold hands the entire time as we walked down a park bridge. There were little cute boats in the river as we stand in the middle of the bridge.

The moon light shines in the water while their were millions of starts in the sky. It was beautiful and everything was perfect.

"Tonight is really beautiful." I commented.

"I feel the same way." Tommy agreed.

"I wish I could just stand here all night." I said.

"Me to." Tommy said and l looked at him. He was staring at me with his beautiful ocean eyes. He looked more beautiful in the night time.

I felt Tommy grabbing both my hands now as he force my whole body to face him.

"Tine you know I like you right and not just a friend. More than that. But every time I try to get closer and hit on you, you play so hard to get but why?" Tommy admitted.

I don't even know what to say. I already noticed that Tommy has been hitting on me but I always stop him from going too far. He shouldn't fall me for. He's too good and I'm not good enough for him. I really care about him and I don't want to make him feel bad.

"Can you just just tell me why you're so scared to try?" Tommy finally asked me.

And I wish he didn't asked that question. I wish he didn't have to put me on the spot and force me to tell him. I just want to enjoy the view tonight.

"Can I not tell you?" I asked him.

"I deserve to know. I want to know if I'm wasting my time and I shouldn't chase you." Tommy said and he's right.

I ball up my fist tightly as I prepare for what I am about to tell him.

"I dated a guy back home and we fell in love. Things got....complicated and we ended." I told him the short version.

"Is he the reason why you moved to New York?" Tommy questioned me. I shake my head no.

"My brother was moving here and I didn't want to be apart from him. He will be gone for too long so I decided to study here." I told him instead of the whole truth.

Sarawat is the reason why I'm here but I don't want to tell Tommy that. I don't want him to think that I am not fine.

"Do you....still love him?" Tommy asked me.

"I don't anymore. We are over for awhile now." I tell him.

"Good because I really like you Tine. Since the moment I saw you outside our university, I fell deep for you. I wanna take care of you." Tommy said and why does that line sound so familiar.

The only man that ever told me that they want to take care of me was Wat. I watch Tommy stepping closer to me as he leans down close to my face. I watch his lips widened a little as he was just inches a way from my lips. Before he could, I turn my head to the side.

"I shouldn't. I'm sorry Tommy." I told him.

"No, I'm sorry. I should have known you're not ready." He said to me.

"I should get going back home. P'Type is probably waiting for me." I said as I turned around quickly, not giving him a chance to stop me.

I came back home as I went straight to my bedroom. I shut the door as I placed a hand over my heart. My phone dig and had a notification on Facebook. I looked at it to see it was a notification that today is Sarawat's 21st birthday today. I flop down on my bed. I noticed Wat hasn't been active and he use to post about his music but now it's nothing.

My hand was on the button. I want to press his name and press call to hear his voice, to wish him after but I can't. I'm not supposed to hold on and still care about him anymore.

But I still hope. I still hope that Wat is happy and he has a good birthday.

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A/N:How do you guys feel about Sarawat's new change of ways?

Also do you think Tommy deserves a chance to be with Tine.

Please vote and comment if you are enjoying