Sarawat's POV
"Don't you wanna fuck me?" The girl beside me asked but I just lay and ignore her. "Gosh Wat, I didn't think you were a fucking tease." She sat up and put on her clothes.

This was the 4th girl I brought over to my room this week but I couldn't go through with it. I couldn't have sex with none of them.

"I'm sorry for waisting your time." I apologize to her and I heard her scoff and slam my door hard. I sighed really heavily and just closed my eyes.

I really have lost myself and I didn't expect things to turn out like this. I heard my door knocking and I grunted and got off my bed and opened it. I saw Tharn, Khai, and Third surprisingly. Tharn and Khai had a two large plastic bags in their hands and I can instantly smell the food from them.

"Let us in Wat. The food will get cold." Khai said and I give them way.

"Ai Wat, your room is so dark. No sun light." Tharn said.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked them but I kind of already know.

"For dinner. We thought we'd come to your room and eat." Khai said and I watch him setting up the small table in the room. He laid out all the foods.

I sighed and got myself to sit in front of him while Third sat beside him and watched, he also helped a little. Tharn sat beside me but not without him sending a text with a huge smile on his face. He was showing teeth as well.

"Was that from Type?" Khai asked as he dropped a fork in front of him.

"Hmm, he told me he is going to do homework after he finished his dinner." Tharn says and he put his phone down.

We began to eat together and Khai has been telling me and Third what happened this week at school. Third doesn't go to our university. He goes to a more prestigious one and the tuition is hella expensive. Third does film making and he works with the drama club as well. He writes the scripts and screen plays.

"Ai wat, Me and Tharn can't keep covering for you for attendance. You have to come back sooner or later. We have tons of homework assignments." Khai told me and I heard him.

"You don't have to cover anymore. I'm going on Monday next week. I just needed some time off that's all." I told him. I watch all the worried faces that everyone is giving me. I roll my eyes at them. "What?" I questioned them.

"There is.......something that we've been holding off to tell you" Tharn began to say.

"What is it?" I asked him as I take a bite of my rice.

"Tine.....was hospitalized yesterday. He didn't show up to school." Tharn broke the news and I stop chewing. I just force swallow all of the rice as hard as I can.

I literally had no idea. My first intention was to jump up out of this seat and go see him but Instantly restrained myself from doing so. He is not my boyfriend anymore and not my responsibility to care.

"Oh." Is all I could muster up to say.

"That's it? Is that all you have to say?" Khai asked as he sort of yells at me.

"What do you expect me to say?" I questioned him.

"I don't know maybe is he okay? Is he hurt? What happened?" Questions like that. " Khai said.

"I'm not his boyfriend. I have no right to ask about that." I told him.

"Cut the crap Wat. You're acting like you don't give a fuck about Tine anymore. It's clear that you still do and you need to stop acting like a bitch. This whole....sex tape bullshit is over and dealt with." Khai told me as I just slam my fork down.

"What the hell are you trying to say" I questioned him.

"Tine wanted revenge, he wanted to break and humiliate you but that was all before. People change their minds." Khai admit to me.

I understand what he is saying but I just can't forgive him. I sound selfish but it's not just that situation of why I can't forgive Tine. It's everyone that wants us apart. It's best if Tine and I are not together so no one will get in our way. It's for his protection.

I got up from the table as I gather my plate and all my trash.

"I'm done eating. You guys can leave when you're done. I'm going to bed early." I announced myself to leave.

Three days later.....
I was at my faculty while I await for Pam. I'm not sure what I'm doing is the right decision but it's to keep everyone from having false hope. I felt a tap on my shoulder and I turn and saw Pam with a smile on her face. I gave a smile back but it wasn't as big and bright as hers.

"I got your text. What do you want to talk to me about?" She asked me.

I was balling my hand into a tight fist. Trying to prepare myself for what I'm going to say.

"Let's.......be together." I told her. I watched Pam eyes expand. She was surprised.

"As in...."

"As in boyfriend and girlfriend." I told her and this time her mouth began to open.

"Sarawat, are you wanting to date me now because you and Tine just broke up?" She asked me and I force a laugh.

"Tine? I'm over him. I'm asking you to be my girlfriend because I miss our relationship. I thought about it and I've been unfair to you. I broke up with because I had a silly crush on some....guy." I say to her.

"So....you're over Tine. Really?" She asked me again and I nodded and I watched her smile happily. I pet her head but I slowly stopped when I realized it didn't feel right.

I don't know exactly why I pet her. I normally never do that to her but only to Tine.

"Sorry Pam. It's just....a reflex." I apologize to her. Pam grabs my hand and puts it back on her head.

"That's okay Sarawat. I miss your touch." She told me and she smiled again.

I watch Pam grab ahold of my arm as she lay her head onto it.

"I'm glad we are back together. I feel more safe now." She said.

"I'm glad to." I told her but I'm not.

I'm not glad that we are back together. It doesn't feel right. I don't feel love. Not the love that I feel towards Tine. She's not Tine and she will never be.

**********
Dr. White returned to our class today by surprised. It's been several months since we seen her. She brought in a human size manikin of a pregnant belly. It looks like we will be learning about pregnancy. I'm wondering how many times are we will see Dr. White this year?

"Class, I hope you remember Dr. White. She's here again to talk about another lesson. Now we are just waiting for our guest students to arrive first and then we will get started." Our professor said and as soon as he said that, the door knocked. "Come on in students." He said and a bunch of students came in.

It was the law students and again the only student that seem to stick out the most was Tine. He stood their innocently like before but this time he was a bit sad and not very lively. His happy spirit is gone. Tine looked around the room until he spot me. This was the first time we made eye contact since last week and oh god I missed it. I missed looking at his beautiful face.

Tine looked away momentarily and I did the same.

"Please sit with your partner from last time." Dr. White said to the law students.

I felt Tharn's hand on my shoulder as he gave me a faint smile and left, leaving me alone. I watch Tine walking towards my desk.

"May I.....sit?" He asked carefully.

"Do whatever you want." I said to him. A bit cold. Tine nodded and sat beside me. I looked beside him to see his wrist bandage up on him.

So it's true. He really was hospitalized a few days ago but what happened?

"I'm passing back your project reports from a couple of weeks. I've graded them and I was very impressed with a lot of them but I was most impressed with Tine and Sarawat's report. Everything was well explained and written. You both are well experienced." Dr. White praised us and I heard a bunch of laughs.

It's fucking embarrassing to here Dr. White say that to us. I watch Tine slowly picking up our report but I angrily snatch it from him and crumbled it.

"What are you doing?" Tine asked me.

"It's garbage. It's worthless." I stated to him.

"But I just wanted to re look at what we wrote." He complained but Ignore him. "Asshole." I heard Tine insult me and I began to forcefully grab him by the arm.

"I'm not in the mood for your insults Tine. You really don't wanna make me angry right now. It's bad enough that I have to be sitting by you." I warn him.

"Is it really that hard to be seated next to me? Do you hate me that much?" Tine asked me but I don't hate him. I can never hate him. "You can't say it, can you?" I saw a hopeful look in his eyes. He was questioning me. He's hoping that I don't hate him, despite everything that happened between us.

"Don't be arrogant. If you think I still care and love you, you are wrong because I don't." I let go of him and I watch Tine's sad face reappear back on his face.

"Who do you love now? Pam?" He questioned me.

"Hmm, we got back together." I admit to him as I pay attention to the board.

"C-Congratulations" I heard Tine stutter and I look at him. He was staring at me pretty hard. "I hope you're happy, Wat." He said and he finally looked away.

I can feel his heart shattering into pieces by him just looking at me. What I told him really hurt. Tine wanted to cry but he was holding it back. He was trying to act like he was fine.

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