dear,

your petals are soft like fine silk, and your colours have grown evermore vibrant. your leaves have braved the worst thunderstorms and your peduncle knows strength and stillness. you have grown into a thousand miracles within a lifetime and now I can let you go to sleep. I will tuck you in my warm embrace for these last moments I have and I will rub your edges and finger your cold stilited thorns.

I will now take a blade, and cut you off from my very being. if you want to reach places to grow, places to fly, I must let you go and you must let me let you go. it isn't easy for me, because like you know pain, it pains me very much, but it's inevitable and all inevitable things has to come to end one way or the other. endings are never sought, unlike the beginnings. but all beginnings come after an ending and so I am ending you. you have to begin on your own and I have watered you enough, for you to know how to grow even in darkness, when there wouldn't be the sun, but only darkness, and darkness.

I will never forget you. because while I nurtured you, you taught me too. to water the right way, to differentiate between textures and understand which was the best and which wasn't, for you, while you grew. and you my dear, you are my firstborn. the evergreen in the thickets and the silver of the moon. you are my light, and you taught me to brave the darkness. you taught me to not fear darkness because after all we are the darkness in the world of dark souls and we cannot fear ourself, if not love.

and while I tell you all this, I can see you withering under my stare, but don't. please don't. if you are withering in anger, I understand. if you are withering in sadness, I understand. anger and sadness has a place because I have always been partial to you. and it's understandable that you feel put out when I am letting you go, when I should let go of other flowers first. but I am not ready to let them go. they will find their ending when their time comes and I will give it to them when I know it in my heart.

but, I will make sure to end all of you before my ending hangs boldly from the horizons. I don't fear my ending because like I told you, it's inevitable. know this, know me.

I know you.

goodbye, my dear flower. I have written enough on you and the petals have run out.

come back to me when you've done enough. when you've left me for enough.

I need you after my ending, for the wreath with which they would wrap around my dead heart.

yours lovingly,
your light

______

©VioletEden

25thApril2017