So. Many of you know I am 100% pansexual. I've come to terms with that, my family's (well my mom I haven't fully come out yet) fully come to terms with it, my friends have fully come to terms with it. But that's not what this chapter is about. It's about the struggle with GENDER.

Now, gender is different from sexuality. Sexuality is sorta like preferences in dating and such, but gender. Gender is how you appear. I know some non-binary people, and most of the people I know are completely female or completely male. Then there are androgynous people who appear as both. But I digress. That's what gender is.

I don't know if I feel comfortable being female. I'm still trying to figure out what that's all about. Believe me, I'm still trying to figure out who the hell I am. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a boy, sometimes I'm glad to be a girl, sometimes I'm a mess of the in-between. Does that make me gender-fluid? Am I confused? Am I just reaching? Because, as a part of the community, reaching is an offensive measure. I don't want to reach, but I want to find out who I am...

And then pronouns! Oy. That's a whole other genre that's barely scratching the surface of figuring out your sexuality!

Then there are the demi categories and the ace categories and the bi categories and AJCKENXNS THERE'S SO MUCH!!!!

There needs to be a book about all the different sexualities. Like a dictionary, but for sexualities. God knows how long that one is.

But anyway, that's my rant! Have an amazing New Years everyone! It's almost here! 😁

**JAE**