So the truth. Everyone wants to know it, few people speak it, myself included. The truth about me is well plain and simple. I hate myself. I know what you're thinking, "I hate myself too," but it's different with me. See people say they hate themselves and laugh about it because to them they don't really hate themselves. They say it as a joke. With me I actually really hate myself. More than anyone in my life. I could list everything I hate about myself but that's too normal. Too boring. Nobody will listen if it's too boring. I hate myself so much that I can barely stare at my reflection in the mirror. I am disgusted at what I see. Despite what everyone else says, I don't find myself at all attractive. Sure that's normal. A 16 year old girl not liking they way she looks. But its worse for me. At one point I wouldn't even look in the mirror. If I did I would just think about things people would say about they way I looked. My flaws would be maximized. I hated that this happened. So why not just stop it? It's much harder than that. I wish it were that simple. It's so bad that it took a person to come into my life and show me that I'm not ugly. This person's name is Logan. When I first saw him I instantly had a crush on him. Not because he was attractive but because he was outgoing and could start a conversation with anyone. Basically the opposite of me. When I learned that he was a year older than me I thought "there's no chance for me." Then I heard he plays football and I thought "there really is no chance for me." Then I heard he had a girlfriend and I thought "yeah there is definitely no chance for me." Besides, who you want to date me, a 4'11, ugly, awkward, anti-social girl. A girl who couldn't even look at herself in the mirror. A girl who disappoints people. A girl who doesn't love herself. Well it turns out that not only did he also have a crush on me, he fell in love with me. I couldn't understand that. How can someone so whole fall in love with someone so broken. But I am okay now. I'm more than okay. I'm in love. I'm happy. More than I have ever been.

I really don't know why i putting this here. I don't even know if people are gunna read this. I just felt like i had to. Idk. I love you guys