*Warning* This may be a bit gay and may be a bit emotional. Proceed with caution.

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I'm Pansexual.

Congratulations to myself, I just came out to Wattpad!

But yes, I'm Pansexual. After years of confusion with my sexuality and who I am, I have realized it.

Now, here is my definition of Pansexual that I tell people when they ask: "What is Pansexual?"

Pansexual: The sexuality where you will date literally anyone.

But that's only my definition of it.

Anyways, like I said, it took a lot of time to realize my sexuality. It all started back when I was five and I moved into my first, and only, house with my parents. We used to be pretty poor and we lived in a trailer house for the first five years of my life until my dad got a raise and we were able to buy a house in a fairly quiet neighborhood. I still live in that house to this day.

When I was little, I would go outside a lot. Which is very surprising since I never go outside nowadays... One day, as I was riding my bike around the neighborhood, I accidentally crashed my bike into this other girls bike. Her name was Peyden and she was my first friend as well as my first gay crush. We were best friends until she moved out when I turned nine. My crush on her didn't surface until I was about eight. I started to have one of those old school crushes. Like... The butterflies in your stomach and blushing face all the time crush.

I had no idea why that would happen to me, I just thought it was just some random emotion that would go away. And eventually it did. When she moved away and I didn't see her anymore that is...

My next gay moment in my life was when I was nine. I did girlscouts for a long time. I just quit this year, sadly. I went to girlscouts with my friend Ana. My mom would pick up Hannah and drive her to the building we did girlscouts in and then her mom would pick us up from the building and take us home. Well, one meeting, Ana asked me if I had ever kissed a girl before and I said no. She asked if I wanted to kiss her, and I said yes. So while we were in her moms car, we made out in the back seat.

But, I was a very stupid kid and this was around the time ebola was a thing, so I told my mom that I kissed Ana because I was scared that I could've gotten ebola from her.

So let's just... completely forget about that situation and move on to my next topic. My first girlfriend!

Well...my first online girlfriend to be exact...

This was so long ago that I honestly can't even remember her name...gosh. I think this was when I was about ten when I met this girl on Instagram. We chatted back and forth in DMs until eventually she introduced me to an app named Skype where she added me to a group chat called 'The Fictioner Army Group Chat'. It was basically a group chat that had a bunch of fangirls and fanboys in it. I met a bunch of really cool people there. Sadly, we don't talk much anymore.

Eventually we started dating, and it was a lot of fun while it lasted. It helped !e realize that I was, at the very least, a little into girls. We broke it off after...three months I believe.

My next girlfriend was a girl named Mina...and to be honest with you, I'm not exactly her biggest fan. She is very openly gay to everybody, which is a good thing, but the problem I have with her is that as soon as she realizes that you're even a little gay, she'll imeadiately ask you out. With my situation, she asked my friend for information about me and basically stalked me for a month before she actually asked me out. But, I accepted and we started dating.

She was probably one of my more intimate relationships though. We would kiss and hold hands and all that gay shit. She had two moms, actually. They were pretty cool, but her step mom was SUPER Butch and she was kinda scary. She was like the overprotective dad. But eventually we broke it off. We're still friends to this day.

My next girlfriend was a girl named Ona. Ona was sweet, but she has serious self harm problems that I could not fix no matter how hard I tried. She also would text her best friend every single thing I texted her, which was annoying. The most interesting part about her was that she said she could sometimes see demons. She says that her mom's Friend hung herself in their house and so now their house in haunted. I don't know, I didn't know if I should've believed her or claimed that she was crazy.

Eventually I broke it off after I found out that she tried to ask out another person while we were dating.

That person was a guy, and I don't know why it feels a lot worse when your girlfriend tries to cheat on you with a guy than with another girl.

Me and my next girlfriend, her name was Hannah, only lasted for a little bit.  There's a reason for that. Me and Hannah dated for about a month, and by the end of that month I realized that I had started crushing on a girl in the Drama club with me. Her name was Chloe and my friend Brooke introduced me to her.

She was gorgeous, and still is, she loved Musicals as well as a musical I love a lot called Hamilton. I'm sure a lot of people know what that is... She also is super into aesthetic shit like I am. And as soon as I realized I was falling for Chloe, I felt guilty. I felt like, though I wasn't, I was cheating on Hannah. And I wanted to be with Chloe since I hadn't felt this gushed up over anyone in my life. So, a week before our play at the drama club was supposed to show, I grew some balls and broke up with Hannah. We're still friends though.

I had planned I would ask her put after one of our shows. We played through the play three times on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. I honestly really wanted to ask her out Friday, but then I realized something. I have no idea if she even likes girls at all. I was scared that if I asked her out on Friday, and she denied me, it would be super awkward between us on Saturday. So instead, I decided to do it Saturday so that if she denied me, we wouldn't have to see each other again and I wouldn't have to deal with the guilt.

So...it's the night of our last preformence of our play. We finished, and we're all standing on the stage taking our bows. After a bit of waiting, we're released from the stage to go say hi to family members and take photos with fans. After I met up with my mom, I asked anyone from the play if they saw Chloe. Eventually I found her, but she was with my friend Brooke and her mother. I didn't want to interrupt and make a fool of myself, so I waited for her to be done by walking around and congratulating everyone. Which in turn, gave me super anxiety. I was scared that she would leave before I asked. Eventually I couldn't find her, so I panicked and asked around again. Apearently she was back stage in the area where we got ready for the show.

I walked up to her, summed up all my courage with the help of some of my friends, and I asked her out.

She was already crying before since this was the last play we were doing this year, but when I asked that, she smiled so brightly with tears falling from her face like crazy before basically picking me up and saying yes.

That was probably the happiest day of my life.

I was now dating a super cool and hot girl.

And we still are dating.

We've been dating for four months now. In fact, today is our four months anniversary.

Yes, we've had done bumps along the way. She moved away and now that it's summer we never see each other...

But we're still together and I'm still super in love with her.

So yay!

Pic of Chloe↓

But this is my gay Adventure through life. I thought it might have been nice to enter it into the #Wattpride thingy since I've used this app for almost four years now and I've never entered into any Wattpad contests or story entery thingys.

I've still got a lot of things to do and a lot of things to learn. Plus, I'm still young. And, I'm glad that I can say that I'm pretty happy with my life right now.

I just can't wait to see where it goes next.