9th✯

"Aerim, we have something to tell you," Mom said with a serious tone as she softly looked into my eyes. 

I looked from Mom to Dad then back to Mom. "What's this about?" 

This only happens when something serious happens, like, really serious. So I was kind of hoping it's nothing related to what I've been up to in these past few days. Especially after my little fight with the members. I wasn't sure whether I should apologize or use it as an advantage to get out of whatever I got myself into. 

Dad stepped closer, putting his hand on the chair's back as he shook his head from left to right, looking at the floor. "Your brother..."

My eyes widened as I kept silent. The thought of Jeonghan missing sort of slipped my mind ever since that day of various phenomenons happened. The scarf, the fainting, the fight, the man with the scarf. 

Shakily, I asked, "What... about my brother?"

Mom coiled her hand with Dad's and looked down at the floor. I was kind of mad knowing the both of them were avoiding eye contact with me right now. 

"He's gone. Missing. I already reported to the police, visited his friend's place. They have no idea where he is. They last saw him only last week," Dad finally told me, inhaling sharp, painful breaths. 

"No..." It felt as if someone dropped a mirror; I could hear it breaking into smaller pieces, and even smaller ones after that. "That— That can't be possible! He's still here. He's just at Sungcheol oppa's place. He's only there. Yeah. He's just hiding from you, that's all."

Mom's eyes switched from blank to sadness when she heard me speak denial. Her grip on Dad's arm tightened. 

"We checked the place and everywhere he could be and everywhere he couldn't. He's... gone, Aerim," Dad repeated, giving my hand a small squeeze. 

"No!" I stood up from the chair by the dining table, my eyes glassy as my vision slowly blurred with unwanted tears. "That... that isn't possible! He couldn't have just left us like this!"

"The police are doing everything they can so we just have to wait—"

Mom's hand that wanted to reach out and hold mine I immediately dismissed, looking away with angered tears that flooded my eyes. 

"Aerim—"

"No! Don't touch me!" I screamed, moving away. "I... I just need to be alone."

At least my parents understood my flippant attitude right now and left me be as I angrily entered the room, slamming the door behind me. 

There was no freaking way Jeonghan would have ran away from us! He's loyal; he would never just leave his family this way—especially me. So what was this about him being missing? 

Still in denial, I picked up my phone from the bedside table and tried calling oppa's number, thinking that his phone just died that night and he couldn't pick it up because of it. 

"Your call is being forwarded..."

I immediately pressed the end call button. Jeonghan's voice was what I wanted to hear, not some lady's voice. I tried again, hopeful that Jeonghan will pick up this time. But after the fifteenth call, I gave up as my vision blurred almost immediately. 

I threw my phone on the bed and grabbed my pillow to bury my face in it. That jerk. Leaving us all like this. Even if we fought at times, I still love him to death because in the end, he's still my brother. He's still the first ever friend I made ever since I existed in this world. Not even my best childhood friend, Ayoung, could compete with our closeness. 

I grabbed the teddy bear Daeul gave me as a birthday gift when I turned thirteen and imagined it was Jeonghan. Thus making me say to it, "You're a jerk, you know that? Why did you leave? Was it because of Sanha and the show? Was it because of me? Did you hate me that much you left me? Was our fight so painful you left just like that? You jerk. You could have apologized. No, I should have apologized. It's all my fault, after all."

The teddy bear didn't reply, as I expected it to. I guess I imagined it being Jeonghan a little too much that I even expected an answer from him.

I punched it in the face. "Jerk."

✯ ~ ✯ ~ ✯

In the end, I couldn't fall asleep worrying about Jeonghan's whereabouts. I checked my phone for the time and saw that it was only 11:17 pm. It wasn't safe for me to head out this late at night but I found myself still doing so. 

Carefully slipping into a pair of sneakers, I sneaked out of the house in the least obvious way and pulled my hood up, hiding my face away. I just hoped that they don't mistake me as a thief in the middle of an almost sleepy night. 

I found my way to the small garden below my apartment and took a seat on the bench. I pulled the jacket's sleeves out more, feeling the cold surround me helplessly. Gosh, why did I have to come out with a thin jacket? I was such an idiot. 

"Aerim?" 

I flinched at the sudden voice calling me out at this time of night in the dark garden. How on earth did they figured out it was me? I had a hoodie on and everything and plus it was dark at this time you could barely make out my face. 

"Not, it's not Aerim. Try again." Maybe it was stupid of me to have spoken words because if they recognized me, that meant they could have recognized my voice. 

"Aerim, is that you?" 

This time, learning from my mistake, I kept mum. It was better not to respond to someone calling out your name when you were pretending not to be yourself. 

Although, whoever was calling me was stubborn because the next moment, I found someone sitting next to me on the bench. I almost screamed for help and punched them in the face if it weren't for them whispering, "I'm sorry."

At that moment, I almost hugged the person sitting next to me because my mind was delusional, thinking it was Jeonghan and that he finally came back home. But the moment I snapped my head, my smile faltered as I found myself staring at Sanha. 

"Sanha? What are you doing here?" I looked at the skies and added, "At this time of night?"

"I could ask you the same thing." Sanha gave me a smile and I immediately found a reason to shut up. 

I turned away and just began trying to let the cool air seep in so it could relax my overwhelming thoughts. This year might not be such a good year for me. When I imagined my second year in high school, I clearly didn't imagined it being as hectic as what I was going through at the moment. All the drama. Horrible. 

"I wanted to take a walk," Sanha said all of a sudden, scaring me because I had forgotten he was sitting there next to me. He was too quiet for the whole two minutes it must have slipped out of my mind.

"Oh," I replied soullessly. Unless Sanha had forgotten, we weren't exactly on good terms right now. He just apologized but I was still mad at him. 

"I couldn't stop thinking about you. You have that charm, you know?" 

I craned my head at his direction. "What charm is that supposed to be? The charm of always pissing people off?" I let out a dry laugh. 

Sanha didn't waver from my comment and just smiled. "You have that charm of always making people worry about you. From the first day I saw you, I just wanted to take care of you."

"What, is it because I'm tiny?" I skeptically asked. "I get it, my height's smaller than Infinite's Sunggyu's eyes—they're still adorable though—but you don't have to point it out so much."

Sanha laughed a little. "That's not the reason why, Yoon Aerim. Like I said: there's a charm in you. That special charm of wanting to take care of you. Do you have any idea how jealous I am over that charm of yours?"

"Very jealous, I'm guessing," I sarcastically replied.

"If you had this charm and that every person you met will be able to see it, I get jealous. Because that would mean that other people would want to take care of you too. I want to be the only person, you know?"

"Then stand in line," I teasingly said. "If that charm is true, then everyone I have met until now must want to take care of me. You might as well be the 50th person—or 100th!"

"Aish, at least let me be the first one who has ever been your pretend boyfriend," Sanha said with a smile. 

"You're the eleventh," I answered with a straight face. I only said that to get some kind of reaction from him. 

Which I did, because Sanha's eyes widened so big they looked as if they were going to explode any second. "Mwo?! How many pretend boyfriends did you use to have, Yoon Aerim? Why are there so many?"

I cracked up so loudly I knew my stomach was twisting and turning because of this. I was lacking oxygen because of this laugh. "You— you should have seen your face!"

Sanha's tensed face softened as he rolled his eyes, failing to hide his smile. "Ha, ha. Very funny indeed."

"Very funny," I echoed, letting out the remaining bit of my laughter escape my lips. Wiping away a tear from laughing too hard, I clutched my stomach to calm it down. It hurt badly. 

Sanha didn't say much but he smiled. After a while, he knowingly pointed out, "This is the first you've laughed so much ever since I met you." 

I let that thought ponder in my mind. It was true. I've never really laughed so much around him, mostly because he made me want to pull all my hair out. The whole situation was what I despised but if I let everything melt away, it just looked like me hanging out with six fun boys. 

"You're right," I ended up answering to his statement, "I've never laughed this much around you—around you guys. It feels... okay."

The thought of Rocky telling me we weren't all just part of a plan—a show came to my mind. We were really friends and I must have missed out the sincerity in his voice that time to have believed his words. Now I wished to take everything back. 

"Do you have the guys' number?" I asked Sanha all of a sudden.

Sanha raised an eyebrow and nodded. "Of course I would have their numbers. I'm their member and little brother, after all."

Hearing him say little brother instead of friend made me think of how close they were. "Can you give me their numbers? I need to apologize to them. I was acting all rational and I feel stupid for letting everything get into my head like that."

"You don't have to apologize, Aerim. The boys won't hold a grudge against you," Sanha spoke with confidence. 

"Still..." Then I had an idea pop up in my head like a blinking light bulb hovering above it. "Give me your phone."

Sanha looked overprotective with his phone. "Why?"

I guess one can't help but feel anxious when they were hiding something. Insert secret smug grin here. "I'm not going to stalk anything, I just want you to record an apology video for me for the boys. Would that be okay?"

Sanha was surprised from the determination on wanting to apologize to the boys. In the end, he took his phone out of his pocket and tapped on the camera app. "Should I press the record button now?"

"Not yet," I replied, fixing my face up so I didn't look like some black virgin ghost in the dark. "Okay, you can do it now."

Sanha tapped on the record button and that was when I began my apology video. 

"Hi guys," I awkwardly greeted with a wave. "Look... I'm really sorry for what happened. I let everything get into my head and felt kind of stressed. I'm sorry if I hurt any of your feelings, especially you, Rocky oppa. I didn't mean to blurt out trivial and useless words like that. Hope you guys forgive me and hopefully we'll be better friends?"

Sanha finally tapped on the stop button and gave me a warm smile. "You did great. I'll show this video to them tomorrow."

"Okay," I answered. 

Sanha stood up and said, "I should go. My manager wouldn't like knowing that I sneaked out of the dorm to take a walk. He'll kill me if he finds out."

"Who's fault is that?" I asked with a teasing grin as I stood up as well. "But I guess we're on the same level because I also sneaked out of my house just to calm down."

"Did something happen?" Sanha decided to ask. 

We weren't close enough to talk about deeper things like the fact my brother was missing. I would never know if he disappeared, ran away or something worst happened. I really hope he's actually safe and that he's just avoiding us and not what Dad said earlier today. 

When Sanha noticed my silence, he nodded understandably. "You don't want to talk about it, I can see that. Well, your prince is going back home, princess. Are you disappointed that I'm not staying with you longer?"

"I don't need a prince in the first place so just continue slaying dragons. I hope you get married to a donkey since it compliments your handsomeness," I said in reply, teasingly rolling my eyes. 

"At least you complimented my handsomeness, right? Be glad because not every girl meets someone as handsome as me, Aerim."

"Please, I don't need to meet more guys who look alike with the donkey from the Shrek movie," I replied. 

Sanha pinched my cheek. "You still love me."

Flinching in my place, I immediately slapped his hand away from touching my cheek. Who knows where those hands have been? "Ew! Why would I?"

"Fine. Maybe you don't love me now but I know you'll eventually love my Puss in Boots eyes. We even have a song related—"

"Stop your shameless promoting and head home already." That was when I decided to push him away but in a playful matter. "I need to go home too so just go already."

Sanha smiled and waved. "See you tomorrow, my princess. Recordings are back to normal."

"I know that." I did my best not to sound sarcastic. "I'm going. You should too. See you."

✯ ~ ✯ ~ ✯

After we finished recording the next episode for the show, Sanha brought me to the boys. I had to admit, I was really scared on what would happen. Has Sanha shown the apology video to them already?

I forced myself not to look at them and their expressions or I'd get disappointed in case I saw a face I didn't want to see. Like the look of disappointment. 

"Aerim!" 

"We've missed you!"

"And of course we forgive you!"

Before I could even mutter up words, they were throwing sudden words at my direction and I was surprised. Sanha wasn't kidding when he said they would never hold a grudge against me, especially after throwing words like that their way. 

Why are these boys so lovable the more I got to know them?

Rocky stood up from his seat and pulled me into an abrupt hug. "Pabo-yah! You think I'd let those words get into my mind?"

"Yah, hyung! She's mine so if you could just let go..."

Rocky didn't, though. 

I was beginning to think Rocky was more than just a stranger. He was like a close friend I could easily open up to now. I appreciated that. 

Eun Woo approached me next as he extended his pinky out. I only stared at him oddly, wondering why he was showing his pinky to me. He explained, "We need to make a promise."

"What promise?" I asked, bewildered. 

"Promise us that whenever you're having a hard time, you would come and cry into our arms? You could even punch us if you're feeling mad," Eun Woo said, wiggling his pinky. 

I intertwined our pinkies together. "No take backs?"

"Maybe you should have leave out the punch part, hyung," Rocky said, chuckling lowly. 

"Yeah, you're right," Eun Woo said, realizing his mistake a little too late. "Oh, well. No take backs. Just... don't damage our pretty faces, Aerim?"

I smiled. "Wouldn't think of it."

The beginnings aren't always pleasant to some, just like it was to me. Yet, coming to this point, walking this far in life, I realized there are more things to be grateful for and we shouldn't take it for granted. 

And one of them is friendship. 

~Author's Notes~

School's starting in two days and I might not update as much by then ;-; asdfghjkl why is school always ruining our fangirling lives? We perfectly made a schedule but school be wrecking it like our bias wreckers wrecking our list. 

Also, I got tagged by ErikaBracamonte2 :) 

These are the questions left for me to answer: 

Have you published a book here in Wattpad?

; Yes :>

Are you planning to publish? 

; There are other stories in my drafts that I'm hoping to publish soon so yeah?

Are you a K-Pop fan?

; I'm too deep in this world and I still keep going deeper. 

Are you planning on writing stories here in Wattpad?

; The Kimichies know the answer to that ;>

Have you ever encountered a sasaeng fan?

; Gladly, nope 

Are you reading English or Tagalog books?

; I wouldn't understand Tagalog books anyway even if I'm half Filipino xD

What country are you from?

; A Southeast Asian country HEH ;>

How old are you?

; I'm YOOUUUUUNG WILD AND FREE— Uh, I meant I'm turning 15 this year

How many books do you read here in Wattpad?

; I don't know the exact number but A LOT 

Are you an ARMY?

; Stop slaying my life like thiseu BTS my hearteu can't handle it

Are you a high school student?

; Yes :> 

Are you always busy?

; Ehh, not so. Busy reading books and updating, yes ;>

That's all for this chapter, Kimichies! See you in the next! :)

xoxo

Byun Sang Kyung