20th➳

The men started approaching us, each with different weapons at hand. I was still standing in front of Joshua, trying to protect him with all I could but who would protect me? We would run, but we didn't want to see how far we were able to go on foot. They might have an even greater stamina than us so I didn't really want to risk anything. 

But was that a smart idea as well? To just stay here in this position, waiting to see what these men were capable of? Obviously, it wasn't, but neither of us were doing anything. Our feet were just glued to the ground and our minds completely disconnected as we panicked to find another way out of this mess we just got tangled in. 

"Why are you doing this?" The words came out of my mouth without my approval and the men immediately stopped, turning around to look at my dad. That's when it hit me—I needed to stall. 

Dad stopped playing with the metal rod in his hands and looked at me. "Why am I doing this? Didn't I made myself clear? I said revenge, didn't I? God, if I knew you were this useless from the start, I wouldn't have gotten married to that wench and made you."

My fists tightened. Despite ignoring and despising my mom, I still wouldn't stand to hear another word he said about her. "If only I knew when I was younger what you were actually like! Look at you. It's horrible to actually think I once respected you and looked up to you."

"Oh, you're really trying me now, Kwon Nari. What? Do you want to know what kids who went through child abuse feel like? I'll help you feel it if you want," Dad said, barging up to me. 

I had tears in my eyes but did my best not to bawl. I didn't want to appear weak, when I already looked horrible with tears streaming down my eyes, blinding my vision. "Appa, can't we go our own ways? Just leave already! If you hate me, why do you still keep coming back? You're not a hater, you're a fan. Because you're back here."

"Fan?" The man scoffed. I wasn't sure if he deserved the right to be called my father. He was better off named a thrash. "You're as delusional as your mother, Kwon Nari. Love? You think that's real?" He pointed at Joshua and told me with fiery eyes, "You think that boy is any different from I am? He's going to hurt you, Kwon Nari. And if you don't know what that will feel like, let me help you."

He raised the metal rod up, ready to strike but before I could feel any pain from the it, I heard Joshua fall onto the floor in front of me, letting out a painful groan. My mind only registered what just happened seconds after Joshua fell on the floor. 

I let out a loud gasp and crouched down, worriedly asking, "Jisoo! Are you okay? Omo!"

Dad scoffed and spit on the road, not at us, but near Joshua's head. "He protects you now but remember one thing, Kwon Nari. Love is a weapon. While love can heal and protect you," he pointed at Joshua, "it can also hurt you."

"Shut up!" I screamed at his face. "Shut up! You don't deserve a right to talk! You don't even deserve a right to breathe! What? Just because love hurt you— no, just because you never fully embraced love, doesn't mean I'm going to go through the same stupid fate as you! I'm not you. I'll never be you, appa. You're just as delusional as my mother."

Words can backfire, Dad. 

Dad let out a hysterical, maniac laugh that was probably forced as he tucked his hands in the back pockets of his pants. "Oh, you think I'm lying? I see. You don't understand or know the pain now. Tell you what, I'll do you a great favor. How about I let you feel the pain using all the items my men are holding, yes? It's to train you so that when the actual pain comes, you won't feel as painful as whatever you felt now."

The tears couldn't stop rolling down my eyes by now. I said to him, "You're a horrible, horrible father. You're a monster—you aren't even human. Why don't you go hurt yourself, huh?! Would you like that? If you say something to someone, make sure you do it first!"

He violently threw the metal rod on the floor but his eyes never lifted or looked away from mine. "Kwon Nari, you're really trying me, aren't you?"

"Why do you keep repeating useless words? Gosh, had I known you were some broken CD player that only replayed the same words over and over, I would have just stuck with my phone's music," I continued to provoke him. 

"You think this is some game you're going to win, Kwon Nari? I never knew you were this childish. You're no Peter Pan, girl. Stop trying to lie to yourself. Grow up already. I'm guessing your fear is being an adult? If we were to talk about you mimicking Peter Pan, that has to be. Well, guess what? You will never and I really mean never get your childhood. You have a horrible childhood, Kwon Nari. And I'm thankful I was part of the reason your childhood was like that."

I screamed in his face, which made him call his men to move and probably hit us, for all I knew. But they couldn't even lay a single finger on a strand of my hair because all of a sudden, a police whistle was heard. My dad exchanged glances with his men, gave me one last glare before they ran away like the cowards they are. 

"Idiots," I muttered, swiping the tears away with my arm and helping Joshua sit up from the floor. "Jisoo, are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere? Any—" I paused in my words when I saw a tint of reddish purple under his left sleeve. Immediately, I lifted it up and sank deeper on the floor. "Jisoo..."

There on his left arm, slightly covered by the sleeve of his white t-shirt, was a bruise that I was guessing came from the metal rod Dad used to supposedly hit me if it weren't for Joshua coming into the scene to protect me. 

I knocked his chest with my fist and muttered, "Pabo-yah. Why'd you jump out in front of me? I should have gotten hit, not you. Now you're hurt."

Joshua lightly chuckled and caressed the side of my head, trying to meet my eyes. "Now, why would I let my Nari get hurt? That wouldn't be nice of me. As long as you're not hurt, I can smile."

I continuously slapped his chest. "You're an idiot, Hong Jisoo. I'm not a kid. I could have taken that hit."

That was when Joshua protested, "Not a kid? Those are different words from the ones I always heard Kwon Nari say."

I ended up smiling a little before I continued to rub away the tears from my eyes. I turned back, wondering where the police were, since I heard their whistle. Only to find that they weren't real police after all. I immediately stood up with my mouth hanging wide open. "Ji... Jihoon?"

He had the whistle in his mouth, which eventually dropped onto his chest since it was tied around a string that he wore over his neck. He looked away, pretending that he was checking something out, but I was his friend. I knew his habits. 

"Who's Jihoon?" he pretended to ask. 

Right, I forgot it was Woozi I was talking to, no longer Lee Jihoon, my friend from when I was younger. The same friend that ran away and killed his parents, though unintentionally. Clearing my throat, I corrected, "Lee Woozi. T-thank you for saving me— us."

"No problem," he said but with an uninterested voice. 

Joshua slowly got up from the ground on his own. He covered the bruise with one of his hand and stood behind me. "You're the one who blew the whistle? Lee Woozi, was it? Thank you so much. I'm forever indebted to you."

Ignoring Joshua as of the moment, I took a step forward so I could get closer to Woozi. "Lee Ji— No, Woozi, don't look away from me that way. What's wrong with you now? We both know what it means when you look away that way. There's always an emotions running through your mind when you do that."

Woozi snapped, "What? Am I not allowed to turn away like this? You think you know me so well, Kwon Nari? It's been years since we last saw each other! Do you think I'm still the same naive boy from back then? Well, I'm not! So don't pretend you know me when you obviously don't!"

I was about to put a hand on his arm when he vigorously shrugged me off and walked away, ruffling his hair in a distressed manner. I wanted to call him, to hold him back but would he listen to me? Of course, he wouldn't, so I didn't try to waste my breath. 

"Are you okay, Nari?" Joshua asked behind me, in a soft and calm voice. 

I looked down and nodded, breathing in a sharp breath of air. "I'm fine. We should get going. I think it would be best if you went home now, Hong Jisoo. Your arm..."

"Okay, okay." Joshua then looped his arms around me, giving me a back hug. "Get home safely, okay? I don't want to see you hurt in any way tomorrow. I'll see you at school. Good night."

The fact that he was really close while whispering all those words into my ear made my body feel really warm. I tried not to stutter as I said, "Y-yeah, y-you too. G-good night."

So much for not stuttering as I talked. 

Since Joshua actually lived in the other direction, we parted waves by smiling and waving goodbyes to each other before our backs turned and we continued on our own way. What Dad said to me tonight was actually slightly bothering me. 

"He's going to hurt you, Kwon Nari."

No, he's not. He's Joshua Hong Jisoo, a gentleman who would never do such a thing. Sure, he did at first but that was because I continued to provoke him until... yeah. 

"He protects you now but remember one thing, Kwon Nari. Love is a weapon. While love can heal and protect you, it can also hurt you."  

I'm pretty sure he was talking about himself on that one. He used love against himself and ended up hurting himself. He probably didn't like how love made him really weak so he decided to leave both Mom and I. As if that was the courageous path. 

Back at home, Mom was laying on the floor with, once again, an empty soju bottle in her hands. I discreetly stepped on the floor, so I wouldn't step on her and wake her up. I stopped in my tracks in front of my door and turned around to look at my mother's passed out state. 

"At least you're better than Dad," I mumbled before I shook my head and entered my room, closing the door behind it. I jumped into my bed and stared at the ceiling, exhausted from the tears I cried tonight. I rubbed them and felt tired. 

Stupid Dad... Stupid words he threw at me. I won't ever let it get into my head. They were just words thrown at me to provoke me, the same way I did to Joshua on the first day of school. It was the same tactic. 

My phone suddenly rang as I was about to go to sleep and saw that Joshua had sent me a text message.

Joshua: Did you get home safely?

Nari: shouldn't you be worrying about yourself? how's your arm?

Joshua: I asked first, Kwon Nari c;

Nari: yeah, i did. now tell me about your arm. your noona didn't scream at you and asked you what happened... did she?

Nari: or did your mom did? dad? maids?

Joshua: Stop worrying, Kwon Nari. No one asked about it since they didn't see it :) 

Nari: what why 

Nari: did you sneak into your room? like, climb the window or something??

Joshua: No, I did not. I'm not buff enough to :( 

Nari: true

Joshua: Wait, what?! Did you just admit that was true?! 

Nari: uh, yeah, why?

Joshua: OHMYGAWD

Joshua: I'm going to work out more from now on

Joshua: So I'll become more handsome in Nari's eyes and protect her from more danger to come ;)

Nari: keep your cringe worthy pickup lines to yourself hong jisoo because they don't work on a kid like me 

Nari: :)

Joshua: Alright, alright 

Joshua: You should go to sleep now, Kwon Nari. Dream of me! Good night!

Nari: mmm... nah, i won't dream of you. it isn't worth it 

Joshua: D:

Nari: kidding, kidding. i'll go to sleep now. i'm reallyyyyyy tired. good night, joshy-poo 

Joshua: Good night! I love you! 

Everything in my body stopped processing. He said he loved me. Great, how was I going to sleep properly at this rate? My body was already heating up like an oven. 

Putting my phone aside, I slapped my cheeks and told myself to just go to sleep.

♥

As I walked into school grounds, I couldn't help but feel like there were a pair of eyes on me. I looked around the area then noticed someone staring at me from behind the tree. Though he wasn't peeping at me like what you'd imagine he would be, I knew he was staring. And I already knew who it was. And he was now pretending he didn't just stare at me. 

Biting the lower part of my lips, I clutched my backpack strap tighter before I walked towards that direction. He stood by the tree, like he was staring at its leaves and pretending I wasn't there standing in front of him. 

"Yah, will you move it? You're ruining the good air here," he said to me. 

I scoffed and folded my arms over my chest. "Mwo? Yah, Lee Woozi, is this seriously how you're going to act from now on? Wae? Because of those emotions running inside your head, you're seriously going to push away your one and only friend?"

Woozi stood up and scoffed, tucking his hands into the pockets of his shorts. "Mwo? My one and only friend? Weren't you the same girl who said that I was her friend, not am? Or was I hearing things at that time?"

This time, it was my turn to look away as I pretended it wasn't me who said those words. I've said meaner things to him, but that was because he could handle them far greater than I could. I have cried enough from last night. Crying early in the morning? I was not up for that. 

"Now leave. I don't need you here," Woozi roughly told me, shoulder bumping me before he left. 

My lips quivered before I abruptly turned around and yelled, "Yah, Lee Woozi!"

He stopped in his tracks but he didn't turn around. His head that was lowered, slowly lifted up but we didn't face each other. 

"I'm sorry, okay? I was just mad then that you suddenly appeared but you know what? I'm also glad you came back and are alive. But I guess you're leaving me again." I let out a dry laugh. "I guess history has a tendency to repeat itself over and over again no matter how hard you try to avoid it from happening. There must have been something wrong I've done in the past to cause this. A butterfly effect, most probably."

Woozi continued to stand there without walking away or turning around. That meant he was still listening to whatever I was saying and—hopefully—was thinking about it? When he turned around, my eyes that stared at the ground lifted with a hopeful expression, only to hear the words, "It was a horrible mistake to come back."

"Lee Jihoon! Lee Jihoon!" I shouted, louder with each call. He didn't turn back nor slowed down as he continued to walk away. I muttered, "Jerk. He's really leaving me this time."

I walked away, my head hanging low as it continued to shake. I tried to erase yesterday and today's event, wishing it never happened but it did. And there was nothing I could do to undo it because once something in the past happened, it stays that way forever. You can't change it, no matter how hard you try. 

Inside the class, I sat in my seat with my head on the table. I wanted to rewind and change this horrid fate but will that ever happen? Obviously, it won't. I was so occupied that I didn't even hear Joshua calling me to greet me good morning. 

"Huh? What?" I lifted my head up from the table and blinked, checking if this was a dream or reality. 

Joshua laughed, his eye smile giving me energy for the day and patted me on the head lightly. "Already daydreaming for the day?"

I shook my head and pouted, flicking my pen around on the table. I patted the sides of my head and closed my eyes, letting out a frustrated sigh before resting my head on the table again. 

"Nari, is something wrong?" 

I lifted my head and leaned my back against the back of the chair and stared ahead of me with a dazed face. "Yes, something's wrong. Everything has gone wrong."

Joshua then turned concerned as he turned to the side so that his body would face my direction. "Did something happen?"

"Yes," I replied, but I blankly stared ahead. 

"What? What's going on? Did your..." Joshua looked around cautiously before leaning in closer to continue in a whisper, "...dad come back? To your house? Did he hurt you?"

"No, it's not about my dad," I replied, but I didn't feel like telling him what was going on. I didn't have the energy to. With every event I was facing, I realized I slowly grew up and started to act like my age. The wonderful beauties of being seventeen. Ha! You mean, the things you start to lose once you're seventeen. 

"Then what is it about?" Joshua took time to think it through. "Is it about your friend? What was his name? Lee Woozi?"

Admitting defeat, I nodded and let out a sigh. "Yes, it's about Lee Ji— Woozi. He's gone, Jisoo. I made a stupid mistake and now it has led to this. Stupid, butterfly effect!"

"What do you mean he's gone?" Joshua sounded alarmed. 

I glanced at him and saw his shocked expression and laughed to calm him down. "No, not gone as in he left this life, Jisoo. What I meant was that he's gone, as in, he's not my friend anymore. He left me. I—" I choked and took a moment to calm down before I continued, "I just don't know what to do, Jisoo."

Joshua gave me and encouraging smile and told me, "Nari, some friends, they come and go. And if they ever come back after leaving, they're the type of friends who are going to stay with you forever. Trust in Woozi and hope he'll come back."

"Y-you think so?" I choked back on my tears. They weren't helping me or anyone right now. 

Joshua's hand smoothly ran down my hair and nodded. "I know so."

I just wished I could believe in his words as easily as he said them. 

"Yah, no dating in class," In Gain, no. 1 in class— no, wait, no. 1 Miss Show-off, said, her eyes darting towards our direction. 

I stuck my tongue out playfully at her before sitting back comfortably and letting a smile curl onto my lips. "You're just jealous that you don't have anyone, In Gain. I mean, glasses boy behind you stares at you a lot. You could probably get together with him."

Glasses boy showed a great sign by blushing and lowering his head, pretending to be writing something in his notebook. 

Gain glanced back—but not fully—at him before glaring at me with an uninterested expression. "I can understand why you're always getting in the top ten lowest in class. You spend too much time wasting your life with stupid love and your childhood. Still want to be a kid, Nari? If you're a kid in high school, will you only become a high school student in college?"

"I don't know, you're no. 1 in class and all knowing. Predict my future for me," I told her, grinning. "Do you see me riding on a unicorn in the future? Do I live in a castle with a prince? Are you my step-sister that turned into an ugly toad?"

"Be quiet before I send you to the principal's office," she warned me. 

"Yah, just because you're no. 1 doesn't mean you have the authority to send me there. It's like you trying to arrest a criminal when you're not even a police," I told her, shrugging. "Isn't that about right?"

"Kwon Nari," she called in a warning voice. 

"In Gain!" I called as well. "We're calling names now? Okay, let's do this! Kim Jang Soo! Minah! Oops, I forgot what her name was. Umm... Kim Jang's squeaky two friends. Glasses boy. Tteokbokki kid. Boy who wets himse—"

"Enough, Kwon Nari," In Gain said in a louder voice. "Do you want suspension? I can have that arranged."

My smile disappeared from my lips as I stood up, hands over my chest as I continued to stare at In Gain—a girl who's almost Miss Perfect. She got good grades, got a good body but her face... it's not on the top 10 lists. 

"Yah," I called her, standing in front of her table, which was obviously in the front row. The noisy class then hushed down, probably curious to what would happen between Kwon Nari and In Gain. Busy bodies with nothing better to do with their lives. "You think you're that great? With that personality of yours, I don't think so."

"You better sit down, Kwon Nari, or I'm calling the teacher," Gain warned. She didn't even bother to look at me in the eye. 

"See? You're so stuck up. You tell me things like I'm childish. And you call yourself smart? Funny how you're pointing out things I already knew," I told her. "In Gain, let me tell you something. No. 1 in academics isn't everything. If you spend your time on it in your youth, you're going to regret it in your future. Where are my high school memories? You're going to ask yourself that and realize that you did nothing, absolutely nothing. You're going to regret it, too."

In Gain's eyes looked up to meet mine as she also stood up so our eyes were of the same eye level. "You think your youth is that precious, too? When you graduate out of this school, you'll live as nothing, Kwon Nari. Nothing. You didn't get a good education and who are you going to blame then? No one but yourself. What's so great about memories now, huh?"

"You have a sad life, In Gain," was all I said. 

"You're wasting yours, Kwon Nari," she replied. 

A smirk formed on my lips. "But knowledge isn't everything. In fact, to others, it's probably just a waste of time. After all," I picked up one of her textbooks on her table and let it fall, creating a loud slap against the wooden table, "most of these subjects won't even be relevant to us in the future."

Gain's eyes followed the fallen book and then glared at me. "Detention." 

"You know you don't have the au—"

"Detention!" Gain screamed at the top of her lungs. 

The smirk on my face was wiped off my face as I stared at her with a scoffed face. "You're pathetic." 

"Kwon Nari." Joshua immediately stood up from his seat and wandered next to me, unsure whether to stop me or Gain. His head moved from the both of us before he decided to speak to me, "Yah, don't do this. You'll get into trouble."

I ignored Joshua and stood closer to Gain's table. "Go ahead. Give me detention. Add punishment points. But all of those... do you think I'll care? Do you think that will do anything? They're all futile, In Gain. Stop being delusional. You're no. 1, so stop it."

Gain only screamed in my face and that was when a teacher entered the classroom and stared at the three of us. 

"What's going on here?" he asked. I couldn't tell which teacher it was since I never bothered in the first place. I didn't recognize his face. 

"Teacher! Kwon Nari is bullying me!" Gain complained like the teacher's pet she was. 

Obviously, since she was no. 1, the teachers will always be on her side. 

He barged into the classroom and made eye contact with me, sternly. "Kwon Nari. You. Detention after school."

I scoffed before I smiled at him. "You teachers must really like me, huh? You can't get enough of my face so you give me detention, right?"

"Don't even think about escaping this time around," he warned. 

Oh, so it was the teacher from before. The same one who gave me detention which I escaped from. "Yup, you teachers like me too. It's not only In Gain who gets all the attention. You guys just can't get enough of my face."

His eyes moved from me to look at Joshua and also said, "Detention."

Now the whole class was murmuring. 

I eyed everyone and said in a stern voice, "Yah, shut up! Shut up while I'm still asking you to. Watch when you move those lips of yours or I'll cut them off for you as a gift. Do you want that to happen?"

Everyone in the class fell silent. 

The teacher was not pleased at this. "You two. Principal's office. Right now."

I snapped my head back at the teacher and glanced at Joshua for a second before my full attention fell on the teacher. "Don't drag Jisoo into this. He did nothing wrong."

"I don't care—"

"Wow." I clapped sarcastically. "A teacher doesn't care. We, as students, are the mirror to your actions, saem. And if you don't care about who's wrong and who's right, why would I care, too?"

The class began murmuring again and I snapped my head at their direction, giving them glares which immediately made them shut up. They better be careful with what they say. They do not want to mess with a girl like me. 

Even the teacher was silent. Only after a while, he said to the both of us, "Detention for a week and that's final."

~Author's Notes~

Here's another update! *^^* I ain't kidding when I said I wanted to end this book before August, haha! :) Hoped you enjoyed this chapter :)))) 

xoxo 

Byun Sang Kyung