Hey, sorry this took so long. I promise I'm still keeping this up but I had a lot of shit going on this year. But here you go! I won't be addressing what happened with Kuroko's gran as much after this because it's honestly really hard for me and I honestly nearly scrapped this because I cried during it. But here you go - it's a heavyish chapter so just be careful. Also new chapter title font because my membership on picmonkey ran out.

CW: Accidental-ish deadnaming, familial transphobia, binding unsafely, misgendering, dysphoria.

"So how've you been doing? Are you okay staying with Kagami?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." Kuroko leaned against the hallway wall, looking up at the patterns on the ceiling. "I like staying with him so I don't mind."

"You're sure? Have you got everything that you need?"

He managed a small smile. "Yeah, I've got everything. Thanks."

"Your grandmother is leaving the day after tomorrow. Will you be coming home then?"

Kuroko's shoulders relaxed. "Yeah. Yeah, I'll come home once she's gone."

"Alright." His father paused and tension swelled in Kuroko's throat. "She's been upset since you left."

"Oh." He tried to sound as interested as he had been in the conversation up until now. He tried to sound like he cared. He tried to sound like his heart wasn't doing somersaults down in his stomach.

"Look," he sighed after a long pause, "I know that this is tough on you. But it's not easy on her. You know that."

"I know." A lump swelled up in Kuroko's throat. It sure seemed easy that night. She had found it so easy to blame him for everything going wrong in their lives. "But it being hard on her doesn't make it any easier on me."

"I know..." His father sighed again. Kuroko ran his thumb over the volume buttons on his phone, pressing one or the other every now and again in a slow, repetitive pattern. "Look... She'll be leaving on Sunday and you won't need to see her again for another few months. Why don't you just come to brunch with us to send her off? You can bring Kagami if you want."

No. Don't do it. It would only end badly - not just for him. For every single one of them. His parents, his gran, Kagami. He closed his eyes. "Can we talk about something else for a little bit?" He whispered. His breath caught in his throat.

"Yeah. Sure," he agreed. "How did that test go the other day?"

"I think I did okay in it," Kuroko hummed. His shoulders began to relax a little again as the conversation wore on. The brunch escaped his mind as he caught his father up on the practice matches against the third and first years, and his classes. But of course, that had to end at some stage. "Can I talk to mom?"

His father hesitated. "She's sleeping at the moment," he admitted after a second. "I don't really want to wake her. She hasn't been sleeping well the last few nights." Kuroko's stomach dropped. Probably ever since he left. Maybe he was making her worse. No, her entire life didn't revolve around him. "But if you come out to brunch with us on Sunday, you can talk to her then."

Right. Brunch. Kuroko cleared his throat. "Dad, I-"

"I know it'll be tough, but please." There was a pause. "Don't let it end like this, Tetsuya."

Kuroko closed his eyes and took a slow, deep breath. "Alright," he murmured. "Where is it?"

"We'll be at the restaurant by the park at about twelve."

"Okay." He nodded, to himself. "I'll meet you there."

"Good girl." Kuroko winced and his father paused before correcting himself. "Good lad. I'll see you there, okay?"

"Okay," he mumbled. "Bye."

"Goodbye. I love you."

"You too." He let the phone drop from his ear and hit the end call button with his thumb. He took a few seconds to ground himself - it wasn't his fault, he didn't mean to call him a girl - before trudging back to the couch.

Kagami was still engrossed in his video game and didn't even notice that Kuroko was there until he sat beside him on the couch. "You said you'd stop doing that," he muttered, eyes flickering to the blue-haired boy.

Kuroko shrugged. "You just need to pay more attention. I can't work on my lack of presence and make sure you know where I am in the room." But something was off. Kagami usually didn't notice him until he spoke - he never felt him sit.

"How's your dad?" Kagami looked back at the television screen in time to save his character from death by falling into a barrel of water.

Kuroko watched his character, fiddling with his thumbs. "He's okay." He paused as Kagami killed one of the guards. "He wants me to go for a meal with them before my grandmother leaves."

Kagami's head snapped towards him and he nearly dropped the Xbox controller. "He what?" On screen, his character was stabbed by a guard.

Kuroko pointed. "You died."

"Forget the game." Kagami set the controller aside and turned to properly face him. "You're not actually going to do it, are you?"

Kuroko looked down at the couch, picking at the fabric. "I am." If only there was a loose thread or something that he could pull for something to do. "It'll make them happy. And he said you could come too - if you want."

"This isn't something that you need to do for them." Kagami shook his head. "Kuroko, she's an absolute fucking bitch."

"Don't say that." His teeth clenched. Kagami was right, of course, but that didn't make it easy to hear. Your grandmother's a bitch. He wouldn't have said that if he were in Kagami's place. Then again, there were a lot of things that he wouldn't have done if he were in Kagami's place.

"It's true." Kagami reached out and placed a hand over Kuroko's, surprisingly gentle. "Don't push yourself to make up with her after what she said to you just because it'll make them happy."

Kuroko's gaze flickered to Kagami's hand. "I want to," he muttered, "go to brunch and make sure that the same thing doesn't happen next time she comes down."

Kagami huffed and withdrew his hand. "Alright. If that's what you want." He stretched his arms above his head and Kuroko wrinkled his nose. "So is this brunch place fancy?"

"You should wear a nice t-shirt at least," Kuroko confirmed. He leaned over and poked Kagami's arm. "And shower. You stink."

"I do not!" Kagami dropped his arms and scowled at Kuroko. "We only had an hour of practice today."

Kuroko nodded in agreement. "I know. But apparently Assassin's Creed is a very strenuous game. Go shower."

Kagami rolled his eyes but pushed himself up off the couch. "This is my apartment," he called over his shoulder.

Kuroko forced a small grin for Kagami's benefit. "If you really didn't want to have one, you wouldn't be going to the bathroom." Kagami flipped him off over his shoulder. Once the bathroom door was closed, Kuroko's grin dropped and he curled up on the couch.

Kuroko was still avoiding the boys' changing rooms. Since Monday, he had been using the wheelchair access bathroom to change into his basketball clothes. It wasn't bad. It was large - and it had its own shower too. He never used it though; the mold growing all over the drain worried him. And he could lock the door and no one could wait for him just outside the stall, still out of view of the security cameras in the hall, because there was no stall. Just the one room with the toilet, sink, and shower.

No one ever waited for him outside the door except for Kagami - he suspected the latter had scared them off. The cleaners had managed to sort out his locker, but he didn't want to risk going in. Not yet. He tugged his shirt down over his binder. He wasn't meant to wear it during practice, but he couldn't handle the sports bra. Not today.

He glanced in the mirror. Okay. That looked okay. He turned sideways. His chest wasn't flat. He frowned and reached down. He tried to ignore the fact that he actually had breasts as he adjusted them in his binder, pulling them up and out towards his armpits. Once he was done, he pulled out his shirt, away from his chest, and released it. He waited until it settled to check again. His chest looked exactly the same.

He squared his shoulders as he turned to face the mirror again. From the front, he looked fine. He would be fine. Realistically, they were going to be shitty to him anyway, so why was he doing this? Why did wearing a binder instead of a sports bra matter so much when it wouldn't change anyone's mind and would, in fact, badly affect him.

He closed his eyes and turned away, pulling open the door. Kagami looked up at him and gave him a grin. "Ready to go?"

Kuroko nodded silently and followed him. He didn't notice. Did that mean the sports bra was sufficient for binding, or that his chest looked too big in the binder? Was his binder too loose? No, he only got it over the winter break. It was fine. It was fine. Kagami was probably just distracted by the thought of practice. He always got like that.

He took a deep breath as they pushed their way through the doors to the gym. It was fine. Riko glanced up as they walked in and waved them over. One of the first years was with her. His eyes looked red, and he was favouring his left leg.

They both started to walk over, but Riko shook her head and pointed at Kuroko. Only him. "You go start warming up," he mumbled to Kagami. "I'll be over in a minute."

Kagami hesitated, but Kuroko was already walking over to their coach. "Is something wrong?"

"In a way." Riko's eyes were narrow and cold. She looked at the first year and Kuroko followed her gaze. He recognised him now. "Fujimoto."

Fujimoto's eyes flickered to Kuroko and away again. "I was the one who trashed your locker," he mumbled. He had a bruise forming around his left eye. It was already purple.

Kuroko blinked slowly. Then again. "Excuse me?"

"I wrote that shit on your locker," he huffed, louder this time. "I was held back by a teacher that day, and everyone was already in practice, so I had a chance and I took it. I found your name on your Facebook."

"That's not his name," Riko snapped. Kuroko couldn't breathe.

Fujimoto glanced at her, and away again. "Yeah, well, that's where I found it."

"I changed it on Facebook four years ago," Kuroko managed to force out. The day before going to middle school. The day before joining the team. He had spent more time online under Tetsuya than his deadname.

"Yeah. It was tough to find." Fujimoto shrugged, shoulders slumping. "But what do you expect from me?"

Kuroko swallowed. "What did Tachibana do?" Riko and Fujimoto stared at him. "What did he do to make you do this?"

Fujimoto scoffed. "I don't know what you're talking about. I did it." He met Kuroko's gaze. "And I would again." Kuroko didn't doubt that he would do it, given the chance, but he didn't.

Riko grabbed his arm. "Get out of my gym," she hissed. "Go to the sports coordinator and tell him you quit. I'll be checking after practice, and if you haven't done it by then, I'll tell him what you did."

Once she released him, he stumbled towards the doors. Kuroko turned to her. "He didn't do it. You know he didn't."

Riko folded her arms, watching the first year leave. "He admitted to it."

"He didn't do it," Kuroko insisted.

Riko sighed and turned to him. She looked tired, and a pang of guilt hit him. All this stress was his fault. All his. "Why are you standing up for him? He was an asshole to you. I thought you'd be glad to see him go."

Kuroko turned and glanced around. Tachibana was stretching in the far corner, and their eyes locked. Kuroko looked down again. "Not when the person who did it is still here."

"I know you think it was him." Riko dropped her arms. "And I trust your judgement. I do. But we don't have any evidence against Tachibana, and Fujimoto confessed. I didn't have a choice but to let him go, and I'm not that sad to see the back of him. He was a sub-par player who wouldn't put in the effort, and he was all kinds of problematic. We'll get there with the others. Okay?"

"Yeah." Kuroko stared at the floorboards, at one specific black mark, probably from Kagami turning too quickly. "Maybe."

Riko patted his shoulder. "Go warm up. I'm going to tell Hyuuga what happened."

Kuroko stood perfectly still for a moment, even after she left, still focusing on the skid mark. Finally, he raised his head and searched out Kagami. He jogged over to him, standing near the door, stretching. He stood up out of a calf stretch when he saw Kuroko nearing him. "What happened?" His brows were furrowed.

Kuroko forced himself to look at him. "Fujimoto was kicked off the team. He's the one who did that to my locker."

"You're kidding." Kagami's eyes flickered to the door. "I thought he just pissed Riko off."

"He did." Kuroko shook his head and began stretching his arms. "But he's off now."

"Do you think it was him?" Kagami's eyes landed on him.

Kuroko gave a small shrug. "I don't think it matters."

Kagami's leg was jogging under the table, up, down, up, down, up down up down updownupdownupdown. Kuroko frowned. "Please stop."

"Stop what?" He didn't even seem to notice what he was doing.

Kuroko reached out his leg and tapped the top of Kagami's heel. "It's bothering me."

"Sorry." The jogging began to slow. "How long left?"

"A few minutes."

"Kagami," the teacher called from the top of the room. Kagami jumped. "I'm aware that you're eager to leave, but can you please pay attention for the last few minutes? I'm sure it wouldn't hurt you that much."

Kagami's face burned as a few people around him giggled. "Sorry."

The teacher shook her head and turned back to the board, finishing writing their homework. Kuroko scribbled it into his journal. Okay, so he finished maths at lunch, and Kagami helped him a little with English. That just left him with history, Japanese, and geography. He let out a slow breath. That should take two hours. It was doable.

He glanced over the other subjects. Wait no, he had a business project to finish too. Okay, he had until Tuesday for that so- the bell rang and Kagami shoved his books into his bag. Kuroko sighed and closed his journal. He would figure it out later.

"You ready?" Kagami leaned on his desk.

Kuroko packed his books into his bag, neater than Kagami had. He liked to have all of his books together in sections. "Yes." He zipped up his bag. "Getting there sooner doesn't mean we get to play sooner."

"It's still better than being in class." Kagami grinned and speed-walked to the door. Kuroko had to jog to keep up with him as they made their way towards the gym. "Who do you think we'll be up against this year?"

Kuroko chewed his cheek. "Probably similar schools to last year. We won't be against any of the others this early anyway."

Kagami grinned, clenching his fist. "I hope we're against Midorima first. I want to knock that smug little smirk right off his face."

"You can't. You'd be taken off the court," Kuroko pointed out. He hesitated as they reached the changing room hall and he picked up his gearbag. "Back in a minute."

Kagami didn't fight him on it. This period of complacency wouldn't last long, but Kuroko savoured it. It was nice not to be rushing to change in a shower stall every other day. He took a slow breath and coughed as he pulled off his binder. He had gone home- no, back to Kagami's the last day with his chest aching. He hadn't been able to breathe properly all night. He wasn't risking that again.

He winced as he pulled the sports bra over his head. He didn't remember it being that hard to exercise in. Maybe because he wasn't used to it anymore? So theoretically, he could work himself up to wearing it during practice. But that could mess up his chances of getting top surgery. He wore two baggy t-shirts this time - one tank top and one regular top to offset the slight bump.

Kagami was waiting for him outside again. "You okay?" Kuroko rubbed the bottom of his chest and nodded. It still hurt. Kagami narrowed his eyes. "Maybe you should leave your binder off tonight. You've been wearing it a lot."

"I'll think about it." They both knew it wasn't going to happen, but Kagami didn't push it any further. When they pushed through the door into the gym, everyone was already stretching in a relatively tight circle. No one was talking, but they were all watching the door expectantly.

Kuroko and Kagami joined them at the edges. By the time Riko arrived with her clipboard in hand, even the end of the first years were warmed up. She smiled at them. "The preliminaries are here." Instantly, she was surrounded. "Relax. We're up against Jitsuzen High first, and that won't be much of a challenge. We beat them in the second round last year."

The defeat still hovered over their heads, unspoken. They won the Winter Cup; they had to win the Interhigh. Tachibana was frowning. "Jitsuzen High?" Riko nodded. "One of my old teammates went there this year. He was really good - they might be harder to beat this year."

"They weren't much trouble last year." Kagami waved him off. "One good player isn't going to change that."

Tachibana frowned at him, but quickly replaced the distasteful expression with one of neutrality. "I just think that we shouldn't underestimate our opponents."

"We won't." Riko nodded at him. "But equally, we shouldn't overestimate them. We need to keep our energy and new tactics for the harder matches." She blew her whistle, and Saruwatari winced, a little too close to her for auditory comfort. "Come on. It's time to start getting serious with practice."

By the time practice ended, Kuroko's muscles were aching. He leaned against the wall, swallowing half a bottle of water, as Kagami stretched. "Want to go for a burger?"

Kuroko glanced around. Most people had left. Tachibana was jogging around the gym - an obvious break, but he seemed intent on practicing some more. Saruwatari was hanging back as well, a little further away, hesitant to get too close. Kuroko gave him a small nod. "I think we should practice a little more. If Tachibana's worried about this teammate, we should be prepared."

Kagami scoffed. "He's an ass. Why should we listen to him?"

"Because he's arrogant and if it's enough to worry him into extra practice, I'm worried." Kuroko glanced up at him. "Come on. We can do a practice match." He glanced at Saruwatari. "You're staying too, right?"

Saruwatari hesitated. "I- yeah, probably."

"Great. I'll tell Tachibana."

Kagami caught his wrist before he could move. "I can-"

"I want to." Kuroko fixed him with a small glare before pulling away and crossing the gym.

Tachibana looked up at him and frowned as he neared. "What do you want?" He wasn't as ready to take the offensive without anyone to back him up.

"Kagami, Saruwatari, and I are staying back to get some extra practice." Kuroko shrugged. "Do you want to practice with us? We can do a practice match."

Tachibana's eyes flickered from him to the other two, standing side by side now. "Sure," he finally said, "but you and Kagami aren't on the same team."

Kuroko hesitated. "Okay. I can-"

"I want you on my team. We haven't been on the same team in practice for a while and I want to get used to your passes," Tachibana insisted.

Kuroko paused. There was no way Tachibana could hurt him without the other two seeing. It wasn't like he was with Shougo's team again - in the midst of a match with the referee's eyes focused elsewhere. It was just the four of them. "Okay." He waved the other two over. "So if we do warm-ups again and then a practice match? We can work on technique after."

"Sounds good to me." Tachibana smiled, and a shiver ran down Kuroko's spine.

"So what are we doing?" Kagami folded his arms.

"Practice match - you and Saruwatari are on the same team," Kuroko told him. Kagami's eyes widened. "If that's okay." He almost wanted one of them to object. But Kagami was still in the period of complacency - a time Kuroko could almost curse now - and Saruwatari looked too nervous to object.

"That's fine."

Tachibana's smile grew and he picked one of the basketballs out of the basket. "Then let's go."

Kuroko stood outside the restaurant, just out of view of the windows. He had almost doubled back twice, and now Kagami was holding his hand to stop him doing the same thing again. "I can't do this..."

"Yes you can." Kagami gave his hand a small squeeze.

Kuroko closed his eyes. He should have bought the damn dress. He had even gone to UNIQLO and tried one on specifically for this. Kagami had tried one on as well for his sake. Instead, last minute, in a fit of 'fuck this', he had bought a black shirt instead, and was wearing it with nice jeans.

Kagami had worn his only shirt to make him feel a little better. He gave Kuroko's hand another squeeze. "Come on. If she says anything, I'll cut her off, okay?"

Kuroko reluctantly nodded. He already said he would. He had to - he didn't have a choice. He took a slow breath and pasted indifference over his face. "Okay." He moved first, releasing Kagami's hand and leading him into the restaurant.

His family were already sitting at one of the tables near the window - his mother and grandmother on one side looking at the menu, and his father on the other watching the door. He smiled as they walked in. "Here they are." He reached out and shook Kagami's hand once they were close enough. "Good to see you again."

"You too." Kagami returned the smile with a grin. He reached a hand towards Kuroko's grandmother. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Kagami, Kuroko's friend."

She chuckled and shook it. "It's nice to meet you too."

"Sorry we're late." Kuroko sat next to his father, with Kagami at the head of the table. "We just missed the train and had to wait a few minutes."

"That's alright." His father clapped his shoulder and passed him a menu. "Take a look and decide what you're going to eat."

His grandmother looked up at him over her menu and smiled. He quickly opened his own and scanned the options. "You look good. Is that a new top?" Kuroko managed a small nod. "Did you like your birthday present?"

He had gotten it over the summer and given it to his therapist for Reo. A black dress with long sleeves and a skirt passed his knees with silver sequins. "Yes, thank you."

His father cleared his throat. "How about we order now." He called the waiter over and let everyone put in their orders ahead of him.

But when the waiter left, his grandmother turned back to him. "Why didn't you send me a photo of you in it?"

Kuroko's nails dug into the back of his left hand. "I didn't wear it."

"Why not?" She looked hurt now, eyes wide behind her glasses. "I got it for you in black and everything. That's your favourite colour, right?"

It was actually red. "I don't like wearing dresses." He pursed his lips in a tight smile.

His grandmother frowned. "Why not? You loved them when you were younger." His nails dug deeper. Yes. When he didn't know that he was different and wasn't a girl and that boys weren't meant to wear dresses.

Kagami coughed. "Well, most boys don't like wearing dresses."

The table grew very silent for a moment. Kagami found his hand under the table and gave it a squeeze as his grandmother gave an awkward laugh and turned to his mother. Kuroko's shoulders tensed as he heard his father sigh, and he looked away. The rest of the meal was relatively uneventful. They chatted about the inter-high preliminaries and who Seirin were going to be playing first, his grandmother's bingo games, and his mother's treatment.

When she was leaving, his grandmother hugged each of them in turn - even Kagami. And when Kagami left, after trying to pay for his portion and thanking them profusely when they paid for all of it, they piled into his father's car.

His mother reached her arm back to hold his ankle - an old gesture they used to do when he was small and wanted a hug, but she was in the front. It did little to quell the anxiety bubbling up in his chest.

"You shouldn't have run off without telling us where you were going," his father eventually said. His knuckles were white against the steering wheel.

Kuroko swallowed. "I know. Sorry, I won't do it again."

"Good." His father nodded. That should have been the end of it but his mother pulled her hand away from his ankle.

"Why did you even run?" She asked, looking at him through the mirror. "She didn't do anything."

"Yes she did." He looked out the window. "She was saying that you being sick was my fault."

His father's shoulders slumped and his eyebrows arched in the mirror. "Are you serious?" He pulled into the car park of the apartment block. "You know what she's like. She wasn't being serious - she's just worried about your mother."

"She was being perfectly serious." Kuroko's nails dug into the back of his hand again. That glint in her eye, the way she grabbed him. She was fully serious.

"Well you should know better than to listen to her," his mother cut in. "You need to be bigger than her."

Kuroko's eyes burned and his throat tightened. "I need to go." He ignored his parents calling after him as he clambered out of the car. He ran up the stairs, ignoring the lift, used his own key to get in and sprinted down the hall to his room. He locked the door as his parents followed him into the apartment.

His father knocked on his door. "Kuro, come on. Open up."

"Please just..." His eyes were burning. "Leave me alone."

"This is ridiculous. Open the door."

Kuroko sank to the floor, back pressed up against the wall. He could barely breathe.

"You're only upsetting your mother."

He squeezed his eyes shut.

"You need to man up."

His eyes opened again and he stared at the locked door.

"Man the fuck up, Emi."

The footsteps left. Kuroko bit his lip hard and tried not to let the water suddenly pooling in his eyes escape, but the more he tried to blink them away, the more they came. Maybe he was overreacting. Maybe what she said wasn't that bad. He bit back a sob and pulled his knees up to his chest. Maybe he was killing his mother.

No. No, it wasn't true. His grandmother was just trying to scare him as always. She was superstitious and old. She was scared. But she was right; his mother was getting worse.

Man up. You need to man up. But all he could do was cover his mouth to try and hide his sobs, curled up in the corner of his bedroom, shoulders shaking, body aching. Man up, Emi. He didn't even deserve to be called his name, even in his head. No, that wasn't true. But the words stung, imprinted on the back of his eyes as if he had seen them emblazoned across the night sky in stars.

Man the fuck up, Emi.

Takeda looked up with a smile as Kuroko entered the room. "Morning Tetsuya."

"Good morning." He gave her a nod and sat down in the empty armchair. The room was stifling, and Takeda fanned herself with a folded paper fan.

"Sorry about the heat. The switch for the heating broke, and it's been on all day." She shook her head and set the paper aside. "How's school and everything been going for you?"

"Okay." Kuroko nodded. He squeezed the arms of the chair. "I... yeah. The preliminaries for the interhigh came out. It looks good so far."

Takeda slowly nodded as well. She was frowning slightly. "You don't seem like everything's okay. Did something happen?"

"Um..." Kuroko scratched the the arm fabric. It was flowery and made of that one material that every therapist couch seems to be made of - the one with the thick threads that he could never remember the name of. "Well... Someone drew things all over my locker. I'm not really sure what because Kagami and the others... hid it from me, but I know they wrote my deadname on there, so now the whole team knows that..." He swallowed.

Takeda was staring at him. She seemed surprised, even though it was nothing she hadn't heard before. Maybe because it was from him. "Really?"

Kuroko nodded. "A first year said he did it, and he was kicked off... I don't really think it was him. He's... He follows everyone rather than coming up with his own things. Maybe I'm wrong."

Takeda shook her head. "You're a veteran when it comes to judging people. I trust you." She leaned forward, elbows on her knees. "Did you talk to any of your friends about it? Or the coach?"

Kuroko nodded. "I told Kagami who came forward. And Riko knows that I don't think it was him, but she had to get rid of him. If I went to the school about it and they heard someone came forward and she didn't do anything, she could be taken off as coach."

Takeda hummed, bridging her fingers. Her two pointer fingers were pressed together, above the others, in front of her lips. "Maybe he did do it." Kuroko glanced at her. "Maybe he was the one to actually write the things on your locker but someone else told him to do it. He has a story to back up how he did it, and you said he was a follower. Maybe he was doing exactly that - following."

"Maybe." Kuroko picked at a loose thread until it came free. "But I'd rather the one who organised it be gone than him."

"I understand that." Takeda nodded. "Maybe if you tell people who you think it is, they can keep an eye on him for you. It might be easier to catch him out like that."

Kuroko hummed, looking down. "Maybe." The carpet had a lot more loose threads than the armchair, and he wanted to pick them all out now.

Takeda watched him. "That doesn't seem to be what's bothering you though. Do you want to talk about it?" Kuroko shook his head. Then nodded. Then shrugged. "Okay. What do you want to talk about?" Another small, feeble shrug. Takeda fell silent, waiting for him to take the initiative.

"I want it to go away," he finally mumbled.

Takeda raised an eyebrow. "Want what to go away?"

"Everything." He closed his eyes. "I just wish that I could put everything on pause so I could process what's going on around me. Everything's going too fast and it feels like five new things are happening and need my attention once one is gone and-" He squeezed his eyes shut. "And I don't know how to handle it. Everything's just- it feels like it's overflowing."

Takeda hummed, lips pursed. "What's causing things to overflow?"

Kuroko shifted in the seat, less relaxed back into the cushion and now perched forward on the edge, taking up less and less space. He curved inward, almost hugging himself. "My grandmother came to visit last week without telling any of us and I just- I panicked. I didn't really have warning so I couldn't prepare myself for it and she said something and- and I ended up running to Kagami's and spending most of the week there."

Takeda's eyes narrowed. "That doesn't sound like you. Even without warning, I thought you'd have just avoided her as much as possible." He'd had one or two conversations with her about his grandmother in the past.

Kuroko shrugged, twirling his thumbs. "She was there when I got home and I just- nothing was really happening, we were just setting up for dinner and she said something, and it just... set me off, I guess."

"What did she say?"

He shook his head. "It doesn't matter. It wasn't that big - I just overreacted." Man up. Man the fuck up.

"I've never known you to overreact." Takeda crossed one leg over the other. "In fact, you're more likely to under-react to everything. And even if you weren't, it affected you badly enough that you literally left home for a week to stay away from her. You're allowed to talk about it."

He swallowed. "She, um... she told me that I was killing my mom." He blinked a few times. Takeda wasn't saying anything. "She pulled me over and said we needed to focus everything on her and that I was just distracting from her treatment, and that if she got too stressed it could kill her and that I was causing that stress." He shook his head. "So... I don't know. Maybe she didn't say that I was actually killing her - not directly, but- but when I reacted, she said that I attacked her and she denied ever saying anything and-" His words failed him.

"What the fuck?" He raised his eyes to see Takeda staring at him, jaw slack, eyes wide. "She said that to you?" Kuroko swallowed again and gave a shaky nod. "That is completely out of order and where did she even hear that? Gods, if that were true, every parent would be dead before our kids turned five." She shook her head. "Tetsuya, you didn't overreact at all. If I was there, I probably would have screamed at her."

"I nearly did," he admitted, looking down. "I might have. I don't know. I don't..." He couldn't remember properly. Maybe he was exaggerating now. Maybe he had made half of what she said up. He didn't think he had, but maybe.

"Did you talk about it to anyone?" She shook her head.

"Yeah." He picked at the dry skin around his nails. "I told Kise, Kagami, and Saruwatari."

She paused. "Saruwatari is... one of the first years, right?"

Kuroko nodded. "Yeah. He's nice." He sniffed. "But uh... I didn't really want to talk about it to them. I didn't want to drag the mood down."

"Tetsuya." Takeda moved forward in her seat and offered her hand. When Kuroko took it, she gave his hand a squeeze. "You're not a burden. Friends are there to talk about things like this with. They wouldn't have minded."

"I know." His eyes were stinging. "But still- I didn't-" His throat closed up. He didn't want to lose them over something like this. He didn't want to drive them all away.

"So you didn't have anyone to talk about this with?" She clarified. "Did you tell your parents?"

"I tried," he whispered. "They- uh, they were having brunch on Sunday and wanted me and Kagami to go because it was her last day, but Kagami- when she said something, he called me a boy and they didn't like that and they just got angry with me in the car on the way back." Man up. "They said that I should have known better than to react the way I did."

Takeda shook her head. "From the sounds of it, you reacted fine. I'm surprised you went to brunch with her after what she said. Did any of them bring it up?" Kuroko shook his head. "Do you think they know what she said? Because that seems very unlike them."

"They were in the apartment." Kuroko shrugged. They had to have heard. She had been loud enough for his mom to come in. "They had to but they just... brushed it off." His vision was blurring, and as a tear dropped down his face, Takeda passed him a tissue. "Sorry." He dried his eyes. He never cried. Never. But it was all coming out over the past week - all the pain and humiliation and anger that had built up.

"Don't be sorry." She shook her head. "This is one of the first times I've seen you like this. Usually it seems like you're trying to be the perfect client, but this is good. It's good to let things out."

Kuroko sniffed and shook his head. "My dad told me that I needed to man up afterwards," he whispered, eyes covered by the tissue. "I just... he's always said that I should let things out and now..." He bit his lip. "I'm sorry."

"What are you apologising for?"

"Everything."

"Not everything is your fault, Tetsuya. This isn't your fault. Your grandmother is an old bitch who can't see further than her own front nose."

He just shook his head. "It feels like it's my fault." And then the tears started all over again. Takeda moved closer to him and gently asked if he wanted a hug. He shakily nodded and leaned into her as she wrapped her arms around him. She used a similar perfume to his mother, and that only made him cry harder. He missed her. She was only in their apartment but he missed her.

Eventually, he began to calm down and Takeda returned to her seat. For the rest of the session, they tried to talk about slightly lighter things, but Takeda was frowning when their time was up. She eyed him a little warily. "I'm honestly a bit worried about sending you back into school now. Do you really think you'll be okay? I can ring your teachers and explain you going home if you want?"

Kuroko shook his head. "No, it's okay," he insisted. "I'm fine. Really." He felt hollow.

Takeda nodded. "Okay, you know best." She scribbled his name onto an appointment card and handed it to him. "I'll see you next week. Your sterilisation procedure is around then so if you need to postpone, just let me know. Okay?" He nodded and pocketed the card. As he stood up, so did Takeda. "And Tetsuya, if anything like that happens again, just ring me. We can set up an emergency appointment - you don't need to go through things like that alone."

Kuroko forced a small smile, though they both already knew that he had no intentions of doing anything of the sort. "I will. Thanks, Takeda-san."

The whistle blew as the ball flew over the out of bounds line. Kuroko pause, doubled over, sweat beading on his forehead already. It wasn't as tough as playing against the Generation of Miracles - not by far - but it was more difficult than he had planned for, especially for their first game.

Tachibana's fear smiled at him, a wild mess of black curly hair and brown eyes. Minamoto. He wasn't bad at scoring or running, and was average with dribbling, but he stole balls faster than they had anticipated, and his teammates made up for the rest.

"Are you doing okay?"

"I'm fine." Kuroko wiped his forehead on his sweatband, standing upright again. This wasn't as bad as it could be, but he would have done more beforehand had he thought it would be this difficult.

Man up. He grimaced and closed his eyes. Calm down.

"Kuroko!" The ball flew towards him. He barely managed to pass it to Kagami, who darted down the court and slammed it through the hoop. Good. They were ahead by a few points, but it was a struggle to keep the lead.

Kuroko turned and ran back to his mark. He did his best to focus on the game, but his mind kept slipping - back to Takeda's office, back to his room, back to brunch, back to the living room.

By the time the bell rang for the end of the first quarter, he was struggling to make his regular passes. Riko's lips were pursed as they returned to the bench. She wasn't quite happy, but they had enough of a lead so far for her to be vaguely satisfied. "Kuroko, are you okay?"

Kuroko nodded. "I'm fine."

"You don't seem it." She tapped her pen against her clipboard. "You're too distracted out there today. I'm going to need you to come off."

Kuroko bit the inside of his cheek, but he couldn't say that he hadn't seen it coming. He was hardly even playing. Kagami tensed. "But without him we don't have any surprise passes or points."

"We've made do before and we'll do it again." Riko glanced at the clipboard. "Tachibana, you can go in his place. Mark Minamoto." Tachibana nodded, but he wasn't grinning like when he played in the Kaijo game. His jaw was set and eyes fixed straight ahead. "Koganei, Hyuuga, you stay in. Fukuda... you take Tsushida's place, and Saruwatari, you take Mitobe's." She glanced up as the whistle blew. "Go. Same format."

Kuroko sank onto the bench, pulling on a hoodie so he wouldn't cool down too much. Minamoto smiled at Tachibana as he walked onto the field, and the latter returned it with a small nod. When the ball flew into the air, Hyuuga managed to grab it and throw it to Tachibana. Kagami was free down at the end of the court, but Tachibana went for a two-pointer anyway, with Minamoto coming up behind him. He just managed to get it in.

Kagami scowled at him. "Learn to pass."

"I thought I had the better shot." Tachibana shrugged and moved back to his place. He tried the same tactic a second time, but Minamoto managed to steal the ball from him and one of the other players scored a three-pointer. By half-time, Tachibana was grinding his teeth and trying to get every point for Seirin just to spite his old teammate. Kagami was the only one who hadn't given up trying to take the ball from him.

Riko glared at them as they neared. They were behind by two points. "Tachibana, pass the ball. You can't carry the team on your shoulders, and you're letting Minamoto get too many."

Tachibana looked away, grimacing. "Sorry. I'll do better."

"Make sure that you do." Riko was still glaring at him as they made their way back on.

Minamoto raised an eyebrow, smile ever-present on his face. "Were you told off?"

"Piss off," Tachibana hissed, eyes narrow.

"You never could share, could you?"

The whistle blew, and the ball was thrown up. Kagami hurled it down to Saruwatari, who scored a three-pointer.

Minamoto's eyes glinted under his fringe. "You could never stand sharing the spotlight, could you?" Tachibana tried to ignore him. He caught the ball as it was thrown to him, but Minamoto stole it. "It's what'll lose you the spotlight entirely."

"Shut up!" Tachibana twisted and knocked the ball out of his hands, towards Hyuuga. The captain seemed surprised but scored another three-pointer. They had regained their lead in the match.

Minamoto just chuckled. "I think that's the first time I've ever seen you pass." His eyes narrowed, head tilting. "I wonder how long this will last."

"You won't be in the games long enough to find out," Tachibana spat. He moved back to his place, passing Hyuuga on the way. "Pass to me."

Hyuuga gave a short nod. Sure enough, the ball bounced towards Tachibana, and he twisted it away from Minamoto. He sprinted down the court, leaving his opponent behind, and passed the ball to Saruwatari.

The other caught it and scored another three points for Seirin. The next time, Tachibana passed to Koganei, who managed a regular two-points. By the final quarter, Minamoto had only managed to steal it off him a handful of times.

Tachibana was grinning again. Kuroko had been subbed in again, replacing Koganei. They weren't just maintaining a steady lead anymore. With Fukuda in the back with Saruwatari, few points were going to Jitsuzen, and Kuroko's passes made it even easier to score. Point after point, Tachibana passed to one of them.

When Minamoto picked up a pattern, he changed it and threw the ball down to Saruwatari. The other first year's range made him fantastic for high throws to other players, and Kagami had grown far more adept at catching anything coming his way.

Tachibana's speed also made him hard to keep up with, even for Minamoto.

The last score was his. Minamoto managed to steal the ball off Kagami and was running up the field, but Tachibana moved in the opposite direction. Kagami caught up to Minamoto and blocked him, and while the latter was distracted, Kuroko managed to knock the ball out of his grip. Saruwatari caught it, and suddenly, it was in Tachibana's hands. He turned, leisurely, and jumped.

One of Minamoto's teammates almost stopped him - almost. But the ball sailed through the net, and a few seconds later, the buzzer sounded. Minamoto was scowling as he made his way back to Tachibana. "You haven't changed," he hissed, even as the small crowd cheered or clapped politely. "This is just another way for you to steal the spotlight."

Tachibana threw him a smirk. "Absolutely." His eyebrows arched. "But it worked, didn't it? Or did you not just lose?" Minamoto opened his mouth to respond, but turned away instead. When Tachibana glanced behind him, Saruwatari and Kagami were there. But that didn't matter, he told himself as he walked to the benches. With the crowd, they probably hadn't heard.

Riko was grinning as they returned to the benches. "Good work. All of you." Her eyes landed on Tachibana. "And it's good to see you're learning to work in a team."

Tachibana smiled and rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry. Minamoto and I never really got on. I guess I let him rile me up a bit much."

Riko shook her head. "It doesn't matter - we won. Let's get changed and go."

Tachibana glanced back and smiled at Kagami. "Sorry for the trouble. Thanks for working with me towards the end." Kagami just nodded. His eyes flickered to Kuroko. "I'm glad you were able to come back in."

"Thank you." Kurko met his gaze. "You did well." Tachibana hadn't done or said anything since the four of them had started practicing together later. Maybe he was learning. Maybe he was getting better, and just hadn't understood.

But Kagami hadn't been grinning as he came off the court - an unusual thing for him. Neither had Saruwatari. "Are you okay?" Kuroko mumbled as they made their way towards the changing rooms.

"Yeah." Kagami's gaze was fixed on Tachibana's back. "I'm fine."

Kuroko chewed his lip. It was Friday, so they had a break. "Do you want to go to the cinema when we finish?" He asked, looking from Kagami to Saruwatari.

For a moment, the latter didn't respond, not knowing the question was also directed at him. When Kagami nudged him, his face lit up bright red. "Um... Yeah, sure! Sorry."

"It sounds like a good idea to me." Kagami shrugged. "What film? And please don't say you're going to invite the other two assholes."

"Nah. Just us today," Kuroko promised. "We deserve it after the match. Besides, they both have games tomorrow." Kagami nodded. "So what do you want to see?"

Saruwatari grinned. "The new Jurassic World movie is meant to be good."

"Nah." Kagami shook his head. "They don't make the dinosaurs with fur or anything."

Saruwatari frowned. "They- what?"

"Look, dinosaurs look terrifying because they're all scaly and their fat is based off bones, which doesn't make sense. A featherless swan is horrifying." Kagami paused and looked at him. "Dinosaurs had fur and feathers. So when they make a movie with accurate dinosaurs, I'll watch it."

Saruwatari's frown only deepened, but he shrugged. "Okay then."

"Hurry up!" Riko called. The rest of the team had already disappeared into the changing rooms.

"What about Love, Simon?" Kuroko suggested. His eyes flickered to Saruwatari.

The first year gave a small grin. "Sounds gay." Kuroko's heart skipped a beat. "I'm in."

"Me too." Kagami stretched. "I've been meaning to watch it."

"Really?" Saruwatari seemed surprised. "It's a romance movie."

"Yeah? And?" Kagami scowled. "I like romance and history movies."

"That- I- Okay." Saruwatari chuckled and shook his head. "It just didn't strike me as your type of film."

"Why?"

"Don't be mean." Kuroko elbowed him and Kagami laughed, clapping Saruwatari's shoulder hard enough to make the first year wince.

"Alright, you're fine."

Kuroko paused as Kagami and Saruwatari pushed into the changing rooms. His mouth felt dry. The bathroom was a little further down the hall - the hall didn't have a wheelchair access bathroom. The door closed in front of him and he turned to leave, but it opened again and Saruwatari slipped out.

"Hey."

Kuroko turned to face him again. "You should go inside and get changed."

Saruwatari smiled. "I will, but you need to change too. Come on."

Kuroko hesitated, glancing down the hall. "I can just use the bathroom. It's easier."

Saruwatari reached for his hand, stopped, and dropped his arm. "Look, they don't know what you're going through. That doesn't excuse what they're doing, but they don't understand. You can't let that stop you from being who you are." His smile softened a little. "Just come in and change. Don't let them scare you off."

"I don't want to start any trouble-"

"You won't. If they start something, Kagami and I will stop them, right?" Saruwatari shrugged. He reached up and pulled his hair out of its ponytail, shaking it loose. "Come on."

After a second, Kuroko released the breath he had been holding. "Thanks, Saruwatari-kun."

"No problem. And you can call me Hernan if you want." Saruwatari chuckled. "It feels weird being called my last name all the time."

"Okay." Kuroko nodded. "Thanks, Hernan. You're a good friend."

Saruwatari's cheeks darkened a little, and his smile grew again. He pushed open the door and walked back into the changing room, with Kuroko just behind him.

Hope you guys enjoyed! Please review and I'll try to get the next chapter out soon!