I published a chapter like two days ago (not on a Sunday wth😳) but don't forget to read that if you haven't bc I know you weren't expecting an update lol

Warning: Mature Actions Are Discussed

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"What does this mean!!?" Sowon exclaimed as you were biting your lip trying to contain your smile.

There was only fifteen minutes left until the carnival closed. You had sold most of the stuff you had, which was really great and you had barely any ice-cream left in the machine.

Most stalls were closing up now as it was unlikely anyone would come. Plus most people had gone home, but the small few were still making there way around the grounds.

You came back from your small break away from the stall about half an hour ago and ever since the two girls have been pestering you as to why you were so quite and why you were smiling so much.

You basically just said that you met Jimin and you have covered over your broken bonds.

Sowon of course squealed and Chaerin just smiled, happy to see you happy.

You glanced over at Jimin's stall to see him smiling back at you with a cheeky wink to which you blushed profusely at.

"See! I'm always right" Sowon said cockily with a smug smile.

"Well you're not exactly right" you admitted.

"What do you mean? you're back together aren't you?" She asked.

"...define together"

"As in you and him in a relationship" Chaerin answered.

"Oh yeah, then no" you said and Sowon nearly had a fit.

"Then what are the both of you?"

"Friends" you said and she rolled her eyes.

"You had to go with Chaerin's advice" she sighed.

"Hey, you called me smart after I suggested it" Chaerin pouted.

"Yeah but that was all theoretical, I want them back together in real life" he whined.

"We will be at some point, just baby steps at the moment. Yeah?" You said and they both looked up at you and nodded.

"Yeah" they answered with a smile.

You began to tidy up a bit before a voice was heard.

"Am I too late?" You turned to see your dear friend.

"Hey Hongjoon" you smiled.

"One ice-cream with strawberry syrup please" you nodded and got the ice-cream ready for him.

"So why are you so late? The carnival is nearly closed" You asked curiously as you whirled the creamy substance around the cone.

"Well I got caught up" he shrugged his shoulders.

"You got caught up with something or someone?" You quirked an eyebrow as you moved onto the syrup before handing it to him.

"Well if you must know, I met this girl at one of the booths on my way here" he began. "She had lost her phone and started to panic so I helped her search all the places she has been around the carnival and then it turned out to be in her back pocket" he smiled at the memory, a deep chuckle leaving his lips. "One thing led to another and we went on like ten rides of the Ferris wheel and I landed myself a date tomorrow night at six" he smirked and you as well as the two girls behind you who suddenly popped into his vision to congratulate him.

"I'm so happy for you!" You ran outside the tent to the front to give him a hug which he gladly accepted. "Where are you meeting her tomorrow?" You asked, wanting to know all the details.

"Grub n' stuff" he murmured and you looked at him with a face of disbelief.

"Why? Of all places in the world why would you choose-"

"Because I'm nervous! And this way you'd be there if I do something stupid" he explained and you nodded in understanding.

"Alright, Fine!" You rolled your eyes.

"Thank you, I owe you one" he thanked.

"No I'm pretty sure we're even now" you assured him.

///

"Okay I'd just like to say thank you to everyone who worked hard at all of these stalls! we've raised over four thousand and still counting for the local children's hospital. You should be so proud!" Amie announced over a microphone on a small podium.

Everyone around started to clap and as you were doing so you felt a new presence beside you. You turned to see Jimin and Jungkook beside you. Jimin turned and winked at you before turning his attention back to Amie.

I guess winking is his new thing.

"I won't hold you guys here any longer I know you want to get home. So once again thank you! And safe home!" She said before stepping off the small podium.

Jimin turned to you with a shy smile. "So do you want to go to that Thai place down the street from arcade?" He asked. "You know, as friends" he nudged you and you chuckled.

"Yeah I'd like that" you smiled.

Of course everyone else in the group was listening in and left before you had to tell them you were leaving with Jimin.

"Shall we?" He asked and you nodded with a shy smile.

"Wait up Jimin!" Amie hollered and ran up towards the both of you, her eyes trained on Jimin the entire time.

"Do you by any chance wanna go grab a coffee with me?" she asked.

"Oh, sorry Amie But I'm actually going to go get a bite to eat with y/n" he politely declined. "Thanks though" he said and you looked at her sympathetically.

But she looked at you with jealousy.

///

"Come on, just take a bite"

"No, I still want my taste buds thank you very much" you sniggered.

You were now at that Thai restaurant that Jimin suggested. It was a small place that wasn't very busy, but the atmosphere was pleasant.

"It's not even that spicy" Jimin complained.

"The three chilli pepper drawings written beside it on the menu say otherwise" you laughed and he shrugged his shoulders.

"Suit yourself" he gave up and you went back to your food, but he couldn't help but feel the need to ask you a question. "So there are something's that have happened between us that we both either don't understand or didn't get the chance to explain everything" he said and you nodded as you took another bite of your food. "So do you wanna do a game of twenty questions?" He asked and you raised your eyebrow.

"Twenty questions?"

"Yeah, but if there is a question that you'd prefer not to answer you don't have to" he assured and you nodded.

"Alright, you first" you said and he smiled.

"Fair enough" he began. "When did you find out about me smoking," he asked with a hint of guilt in his voice.

"It was that time you were supposed to walk me home from work but you never showed and then I walked into your dorm to make sure everything was alright and found you sleeping. You were still wearing a jacket so I took it off you and threw it onto a chair and in the process of doing so, the packet slipped out of the coat pocket" you explained and he nodded.

"I can't believe I left you there like that. I can't believe I mistreated you in all the ways I did. I mean, who the hell did I turn into? I don't do that, I would never do that" he said having an inner quarrel in his head.

You reached across the table and took his hand into yours.

"Stop that, you weren't in the right headspace it's not like you did everything in the right state of mind" you explained.

"It doesn't matter what state of mind I'm in, I shouldn't have done anything to make you feel like anything less than the entire universe. I didn't have a reason to act that way" he was avoiding all eye contact with you.

"You have every reason to not feel like your best all the time. Jimin you had a very tough time a few months ago with your dad and you never got to properly take out your anger and frustrations because you were being an amazing son and only had your mothers wellbeing at heart but then you came to college and your mother couldn't see you everyday and you got to take your frustrations out somewhere" you told him and he made eye contact with you. (Finally might you add).

"The cigarettes" he whispered in realisation.

"And the parties" you added and you could see something click.

It made sense to him.

He quickly shook his head. "I still shouldn't have taken it out on you along the way" he said and you nodded.

"Well no, you shouldn't have, but you weren't thinking straight and you are now. Yes?"

He nodded vigorously.

"Good" you replied.

"How did you figure all this out?" He asked full of curiosity and astonishment towards you.

"Well I had a lot of time to think and considering all my thoughts practically swirled around you, it brought me to that conclusion" you admitted and his eyes sparkled as he watched you speak.

"Your astounding, you know that?" He smirked. "My brain was practically on overdrive about you and yet I didn't come up with any mind-boggling conclusions to anything. I just sat and thought about how sorry and guilty I was and still am" he admitted honestly.

"I know you are" you whispered with a gentle squeeze to his hand.

"But I still want to show it to you, prove to you, just how sorry I am" he said and you smiled.

You didn't say anything, just gazed at him with a grin.

"What?" He asked.

"You're really back to being you" you noted to him and he blushed.

"I shouldn't have stopped being me" he said and you shook your head.

"You can't exactly control that" you reminded him and he nodded. "Okay, my turn" you said and he shifted in his seat, preparing himself for the question. "When did you start smoking?" You asked. "Also did you do anything else other than smoking cigarettes?"

"Well I started smoking a few weeks into when we started college. Minho's the one who first suggested I have one after I had a bad dance practice, telling me that "it would help forget all my worries" which is true, it did, but it also caused a lot more problems" he said feeling a sense of relief talking to you about these things.

"I hate that guy" you murmured and he chuckled. "Like, not to be that shit girlfriend, but please don't hang around him anymore" you said, not noticing you slipped a word.

"Girlfriend?" He quirked an eyebrow and you looked at him in confusion until it hit you that you said it and then you blushed furiously.

"Sorry, it just slipped. I'm not used to you not being my boyfriend still" you explained trying to account for what you had said.

"Nothing to be sorry for, it's quite adorable really" he chuckled and you smiled. "Anyways, I'm not friends with him anymore so there's no need to worry about that" he reassured and you made it obvious to see the relief in your eyes. "But then on the question about if I did anything else, I'm ashamed to say I have.  Obviously you know about the excessive drinking, but I also smoked pot a few times but I did that because I was drunk so" he admitted, you were shocked, yet not shocked.

You didn't have a response to that statement, scared that if you opened your mouth, you weren't sure what words would come out.

"So my turn to ask you again, yeah?" He said and you looked up at him.

"Yeah" you responded.

"Well I know the question I want to ask, but I completely understand if you don't want to answer it. Please don't feel like you have to answer, because you don't. Just remember that if you do decide to answer, it's only me that you're telling and you know me, I won't judge you for anything. You'll still be my muffin forever and always" he said and you looked at him with a small smile and you nodded.

"I know" you answered and he smiled gently and you rubbed your thumb over his hand.

"So, remember when you were at my dorm after you through the cigarettes out the window?"

You nodded.

"And then I found a cigarette and I lit it and I paraded it around like a literal dumbass" he scolded himself at what he did before. "And then-"

"I had a panic attack?" You said getting to the point, knowing he would ramble on.

"I didn't want to call it that because-"

"Because I snapped at you and told you it wasn't a panic attack?" You continued with a knowing smiled.

"Well I wouldn't say you snapped-"

"Well I did snap at you, you're just too sweet to admit it" You interrupted him for the third time. You sighed before you continued. "Somethings happened a long time ago and it affected me in every way possible. It started to affect me too much, so I decided to forget it and constantly just push it to a dusty corner in the back of my mind and forget it. But that day, when I had the panic attack, my eyes were blurry from tears so I couldn't see anything and it just sounded like something that happened to me a long time ago. A loud noise, a door slam, then the scent of smoke and then rushed footsteps coming towards me, it just felt like it was all happening again" you said shivering at the thought.

"You don't have to continue if you don't want to" he reassured and you smiled.

"No, you deserve some answers" you admitted softly. "As you know, my father has gotten himself into a lot of debt over the years, but there was one time in particular were the person he was in debt with was furious with him. Because of that that man sent men to my house when my father was gone to work, back in the days when he did work, and it was just me and my mother alone in the house and that didn't happen all that often so we cherished those moments. We would always have a fun girls night whenever we had the chance, we would sit down and have a Disney movie marathon" you laughed at the memory.

"But when we heard pounding at the door, we knew the night wouldn't continue to be the fun night we had planned for it to be. Before we could even get up to answer the knocks, the door busted open and a man walked in with two other men behind them. They took my mother into a corner while I sat on the couch crying and screaming-..." you paused for a minute trying to keep strong as you told the hard part of the story. "And they raped her and abused her right in front of me, but I couldn't watch. One of the men began to get angry at me for crying so he came over to me at he kicked me and beat me over and over again And then he would stop for a few moments to catch his breath and take out a cigarette before he would come back and do it all over again" your eyes were blurring from the memory. Jimin brought his chair closer to you and pulled you into a hug. "The loud, sudden noise of the knocks, the door bang, the cigarettes and a blurry figure coming towards me as I was crying, it was like I travelled back to that day when I was in your apartment" you admitted softly. "But it had nothing to do with you" you promised him. "I mean I was crying because of the cigarettes, yes, but the memories coming back is just something to do with me" you said seeing his guilt-ridden eyes.

"Then what happened?" He whispered with a scratchy voice of guilt.

"Then they got up and left once they were finished with my mother and she was left on the floor, her own blood and tears surrounding her. She crawled across the floor after awhile and went to take out a cigarette from her bag" you remembered. "I remember her hands shaking as she lit it and she told me they would help her" you scoffed and rolled your eyes. "Pathetic" you murmured.

Jimin began to stroke your hair softly.

You weren't crying, you had done so much of it for the past while it felt like your body wouldn't let you.

You were too sad to cry anyways.

"Then my father stumbled home around an hour later. Me and my mom were still in the same places, he walked inside and saw us and he knew what had happened and he he still just stumbled up to bed and left us there. And that's the day I lost any bit of respect for my father" you told him with a poison like honesty in your voice and Jimin nodded.

He kissed your temple, knowing it relaxes you.

And it did relax you.

"My mom died because from the cigarettes, yes, but she also died a little bit that night. She was never the same after it" you told him.

"I'm so sorry" Jimin whispered.

"I know you are, even though you shouldn't be" you told him. "But without that happening I wouldn't have met you and not meeting you would be like my version of hell" you told him and he smiled.

"I know we are just friends but I'd like to take the time now to tell you that I love you so damn much" he gazed into your eyes.

"I've missed you saying that" you placed your hand on his chin.

"Do I have permission to kiss you? As a friend of course" he asked and you chuckled with a slight nod.

He placed his lips against yours and that feeling of ecstasy came back from a long vacation. He was sweet with the kiss there was no rush, no tongue or teeth, just gentleness and a sense of longing for one another.

You pulled away slightly. "I love you too" you whispered.

"I must be the luckiest man in the world then" he answered and placed his lips back on yours.

TBC

A/N: sorryyy if this was too long and boringggg

thank you for 5k🥺

Stay safe everyone!!

Lots of love xx